greenie35

Hmmm? Sister or lover? First off, are you sexually attracted to this girl? If so, I would suggest not referring to her as someone you consider a sister. Just a thought. But I don't know what you're "in to" so I won't judge. But, basically I would just be up front with her right away if you get the sneaking suspicion that she wants more then friendship.

SHe may seem not interetsted, because she doesn't react favorbly to your flirtations...for example..she might try to avoid you because she gets nervous around you or she may avoid making eye contact with you, for the same reason. But like a previous poster said, some outgoing girls become shy around their crush, so that just makes it even harder to tell...damn, sometimes I'm glad I'm not a guy.

I'm tall (5'9)and I find that guys that are interested in me are usually my height or taller. However, I did have a friend who just so happened to be a "little person" come on to me, and say..."you know, I've always had a thing for tall women" LOL.

I guess I'm toying with the notion of getting to know someone very very slowly...as in...he won't know my ugliness and I won't know his for a long time...that's waht happens when things get serious...we have to start to accept the things about the other person that don't mesh with us if there is to be a future together. There are things about myself that need working on, I realize this, which is why I don't want to get too serious with anyone. However is it considered poor self control to want a semi-intimate and friendly relatinoship with someone else while working on this "me-stuff". I really do like him and am extremely attracted to him. Catch my drift..basically I'm trying to figure out how i want to proceed with this guy...do I want to send out signals that I'm reaally into him, or do I just want to be casual yet inviting...I'm leaning towards the latter.

How true...especially with guys. Guys only like to talk about their feelings when they want to talk about their feelings. When pressured by women...it can get ugly and sometimes the answers you get aren't how they really feel...guys generally need a lot more time adn space to sort out what their thinking.

C'mon Metallicaguy...you already know.. Actually a lot of things girls do when they are shy but interested could be interepreted as being not interested...thre's a very fine line and it sucks for you guys. She might play with her hair or look down a lot when talking to him. I know for me it was the eye contact thing. I couldnt hold his eye contact for more than a second, but I would always look up to see if he was still looking, and he was then i would look down again. It's like instinct, not something we think about we just do it. I would catch myself biting my lip alot...or if I had to pass by him I would rub my chin or ear (it's a defense mechanism like hiding your face/feelings). Then there were times where we would pass where I would concentrate on not looking at him at all for fear of geeking out big time. So it's probably pretty hard to tell. Just make yourself seem harmless...do someting stupid in front of her...like trip over your own feet...lol..might make her feel more comfortable.

Do you think it's possible to extend the honeymoon phase...like you're not getting real serious, no obligation to call one another, just hang out like once a week...if that...have a good time with each other...etc..how long do u think that could go on? I mean if we both like spending time with each other but there's also the need for space. Do you think things could carry on this way for say 6-8 months if not longer?

First off I want to say that I have never been so unsure about a man's intentions with me in regards to dating. I have always been the one pursued and have never wondered, "should I call" "does he like me". I've always known from the start I guess. This time is different. So this guy gave me his number, and we hung out for the first time last thursday. I keep thinking that I made a giant HEE haw out of myself, but I'm probably just overanalyzing the situation. Regardless of all that, I feel like I should give him a call. We work together, so it's not like I'm not going to haev the oppurtunity to talk to him if I don't call. My question is, when should the girl call the guy? Our time together was fun and we got to know a little bit a bout each other, but I still don't know what he's thinking, I can't say I ever really did...only that he obviously found me attractive which he made clear by checking me out from head to toe every freakin day...but he never went as far as to ask me out...he just showed up where he knew I would be...which indicates that maybe he didn't want to "officially" ask me out because that might imply something, or maybe it's because he's just shy with girls. So when's a good time...I don't want to come on too strong. HE acts really timid, but I'm not sure if he's really timid or just not REALLY interested. [/b]

I'm not sure really...maybe it's the attention you're getting from this other guy, you want to be sexually appealing to him, and it's kind of a challenge or a turn on for you...I don't know really I can't possibly know what you're feeling or thinking. If you know your boyfriend is better for you in so many ways, I say don't try anything with this friend. It would just end up hurting your boyfriend, which you said you don't want to do. You say your boyfriend is the love of your life, well treat him that way and don't disrespect him by jumping into to something with someone who is only mildly appealing to you.

I'm not sure quite what your asking about your "friend". Your saying you talk "sexual"....so are you saying that if you were to get involved with this friend, it would be for sex and pretty much nothing else?

You're having these feelings because you are finding yourself and experiecing new things. No, you're not crazy, but it is far to early to know that you want to marry someone. You're only 16...alot of things are going to happen in your life before that day comes, you may be a completely different person by then. But, who knows maybe you can talk to your boyfriend and tell him that you want to date other people, but you love him and hope that if it's meant to be you will get back together someday. If he feels the same way about you, he may be very upset,but if the feelings you have are strong about dating this other guy, then you should definitely go for it. Who knows what could happen, you might realize that you are more compatible with other guy, and if not then perhaps you and your boyfriend can continue seeing each other again. I say go for it, but have a good long talk with your boyfriend first. If he loves you he should understand, just don't expect him to be waiting in the wings for you...he needs to feel like he can date others too.

We are both on the rebound

Can it work...has it worked for you...I understand the problems that can arise from dating on the rebound, I'm just curious as to whether anyone has had success with dating on the rebound...did you take it really slow...wait it out till it felt right? Lemme know...

Do you think it's possible for two people with distinctly different tastes in music to date each other and have a good relationship. I mean the guy in question lives for making music and it is really kind of heavy rock. Which is cool...I like it. But, I dont' think he would like a good portion of the music I listen to. More often then not people's sense of style tends to revolve around their taste in music. This is the case here as well. I'm more hippie and he's more punk. Do you think this could work? I don't really buy into the whole you are what you listen to idea, but I know alot of people do. What do u think?

It probably has a lot to do with the fact that he's not sure if you like him so he doesn't want to come on too strong.