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sukerbut

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  1. sukerbut
    hey silvercloud mine to came from a broken home..her motehr cheated on teh father whith the next door neighbor and got caught..they divorced when she was 13..from day one her mother preached you dont need to depend on men..be independent..the mother is abit of a wack job..and since my ex has a decent relationship with ther dad..all her mom does i think is hate on her..always never good enough..never allowed to realx always making her do things around the house meanwhile the little sister gets all teh love and forgiveness and does not lift a finger around the house..and her relationship with her dad is not as strong..i have broken all this down...my ex is 23 she has slept with well over 22 guys that i know of..dont know how many i dont know about...the thing is she is not even sexual she is not a nypmh or anything like that! she is i think insecure, and does not love herself thats why she goes looking fro acceptance...do you know how hard it was for me to sit last year at a table during her b-day with 2 ex lovers that are now her so called friends...she still talkes to all her exe's , when i met her 5 yrs ago..she cheated on her b/f with me..i was 26 she was 17..do you know that ehr mother at first was excited that ehr 17 yr old daughter was going to go out with a 26 yr old man while she was still dating someone steady..i mean that is just bizarre...after her mom saw that i was getting serious with ehr she finally intervined...that started the whole saga..5 yrs of on and off dating and me giving her all teh love warmth and support just to continously get ossed by some one of this disgusting caliber is very demorolizing..but you cant help whom you fall in love with and i fell for her 5 yrs ago...this last time around even knoiwing about ther disgusting past in college..which she sees nothing wrong with i swallowed my pride and let love take over..and this is what i got....i mean male friends from jail calling , e-mails from exes in the army stationed in korea reading cant wait to come home and make love to you..of course that e-mail was sent to her 5 days before we became official b/f g/f//her goping to miami before again we were oficial and sleeping with some dude becasue she thougtbh it was going to work out..and int eh end..i was the crazy and insecure one..i right this stuff so ic an heal and inform everyone here what mystruggles were and as to why i wish nothing but bad to her...good luck babe these people are always going to live a sad miserable existence..becasue unfortunately that is all they know..
  2. sukerbut
    and this was the guy you keep telling us about..how even though you guys broke up you just want him to be happy..thats my story only i was with a woman with a bad reputation...even her cousins boyfriend whom is my cousin told me..pete dont do it again..she burned you twice shell burn you again..and guess what ..she did AGAIN with no remorse, after she reassured me that she would not get in this relationship again with me if she was not sure i was the one..what a joke...she used me ..sucked the love out of me..and then tells me..well i tried also...i mean come on..july im you favorite person and aug you dont want to be with me any more..thats just not noraml..im sure another guy came in the pic..like it has happened in teh past and she dropped like a sack of potatoes...so you knwo what..i dont want the best for her..i want her to hurt and hurt..and yes i am bitter .. becasue i fell in love with a self centered manipulative selfissh attention hoar! so pelase dont want this guy to be happy..he used you..chew you up and spit you out..just like that..as soon as they got bored they bolted..these people are parasites...i ma not saying this for all the dumpoers out there, but in our situations dealing with trash like these two..i would disagree and say i want nothing but the worst for them. and the best part..leeches like them will never know what they missed becasue they are iompervious to feeling and needs...just parasites..good luck hun..i have been very upset latly .. i am healed but very pissed as to someone that was shown so much love can just toss a great relationship in teh garbage because in her words "i know this is going to bight me in the * * * one day, but right now ITS ALL ABOUT ME!!" YEAH I WANT THE BEST FOR HER.,..I HOPE SHE GET FAT REALLLL FFAT HAHA
  3. sukerbut
    foolish..please! foolish is running into your ex in a club and making a drunken fool of yourself in front of her friends..foolish is still sending her poems, b-day gifts and lsot jewlery you found in your pockets to her with "im still your biggest fan notes" not too long ago after she has reassured you that its over and made you feel like a complete asss ..haha dont worry bout being foolish..it does not matter what you look like to her..who cares...worry bout fixing yourself and finding the next one that is going to rock your world...put her in the coffin and send her 6 feet under cause she dead to you bro...she had no problem putting you in cement shoes and throwing you in the river..!!! now feel foolish for feeling foolish becasue she is not even worth one more emotion from you...(by the way im feeling stong today lol)
  4. sukerbut
    what an excellent post roy!!!and so on the money. well done kudos to you
  5. sukerbut
    dude please staw away from her....you still want this girl..i dont care what you say..the only reason you want to hang wiht ther is becasue you have hope to make things work...dont regress any more..i know the way your feeling TRUST ME i do...what has her answer again ..oh thats right "we will see" does not sound very reasuring to me...why keep her as your friend, why try to coerce her into trying again if she does not have any feelings for you..i mean do what you want and i wish you the best of luck , ir eally do but i think you are just digging a deeper hole for you to get out of with the healing process, maybe i am just a bitter man but i know your intentions..so dont sit there and tell us you dont want her back becasue she has been with someone...anways good luck we will be here for you
  6. sukerbut
    cool lady i feel your pain..i should of dumped her also..she was not good to me..i was emotionally abused as well..i gave her my heart, my money, my time and my support..she was not for me..we both have very diffrent values..i mean a wolamn that sleeps with well over 20 guys by the time she is 22 and see's nothign wrong with it..has issues..i cought her lying to me but i wanted it our relationship work so much..i overlooked it..so yeah i know were you are coming from...it hurts..but the pain should make you determined and stronger to fight and win..and yes 3 motnhs ago..i could of not said what i am saying right now..and even if i did i would of not whole heartedly meant it..but at the same time i was working..working hard to better myself...this is the best i ahve ever lokied and felt in ym life..because of her...that terminology of what does not kill you only makes you stronger..is so true..i was so confident before she came back into my life..but sure enough she bought me down, made me feel bad about myself..made me feel insecureabout the relationship..AND i was the crazy one..do you know how hard it is to sit at dinner with her during her b-day and having to share the festivities with 3 other dudes that she was romantically involved in teh past.(that are now her so called friends) .she would get calls form her so called friend from jail (armed robbery adn heroin addict) that was just realesed in aug just so she can hang out witrh him.(of course as friends).eventually she made me into a lunatic i did not know if i was coming or going...i cant believe i loved this girl so much..she did me the biggest favor ever!! and i was the insecure and crazy guy in her eyes..i tried to heal her with my love instead i was thrown to the curb..things happen for a reason...now i know why..she was the cancer in my life..she bought me down..and i just fed of her rejection..looking back i still love her, but i never ever want our paths to cross again..i will not aloow myself to be toyed around liiek that ever again...one day she will pay the price, maybe not now, but in teh future she will realize what an awsome man iw as and regret it every day..i on the ohter hand will never have regrets..i will only be thankful to her..thankfull for bettering my life..thank you cris
  7. sukerbut
    i have been on this web sight for nearly 5 months...i was so fortunate for finding it..i can clearly remember how my world was rocked and turned upside down early october...i was betrayed and rejected by the only woman i ever loved enough to want to marry..the feeling of emptiness, new found loneliness, and worthlessness consumed me daily...but it was not my fault!! my biggest hurdle in getting over this was trying to search for answers as to why this woman that i loved so much would reject me not once, not twice but 3 times...well my friends as you know i am not on here to vent but to help now...I WANT EVERY dumpee to know it was not your fault...dont beat yourselves up..the pain will subside and when the blinders come off you will realize that its probably for the best this happened...i am so tired of reading posts about soul searching and bettering yourself becasue you were dumped by some one...I know i was the prize in this realtionship..i was the one with the values..so please folks as hard as it is ... pick up the pieces and better yoorselves becasue you have a new found freedom, not because youw were rejected..there is no reason to soul search..you are still the great person you were when you guys met...use the rection to fuel your fire..go to the gym..say to yourself next time she see's me her jaw will drop..make that network of friends you have bigger and stronger..dont quit..work throught the pain, aggrevation, frustration and use it to your advantage..its not goign to be easy but when you finally get there..you will be greatky rewarded..so get off your soory asss and start making moves..i dont care how hard it is...become better becasue you want too, not becasue someone that probably was not worth your time rejected you...living a good life is the best revenge ever...the only person that is stopping you is you...so lets go!!!
  8. sukerbut
    Dako thank you..it has not been easy..these past four and half months have been very taxing...my self worth was completely destroyed..i could not understand how i can be so easily thrown to the curb by the same woman not once , not twice , but three times...how easy it was for her to move on, after she falsly made me believe that this time would be for real. how cruel she was to me when it wazs all over.how mercylessly took my happiness away from me .but after many hours of torturing myself..questionis been replayed in my mind over and over..searching for answers that did not exist...i was also working .. working hard on myself and my body.. rebuilding the network of friends that i had and creating new and long lasting friendships..it took time and persevirance..there were days and night that i just wanted to stay home and feel bad..but i could not allow myself to be bought down by this woman any more..she sucked the life out of me..she really did..for the first time in 30 yrs i wanted to get married and she was the only woman i ever thought about doing that with..and she knew it..she knew it when she got in this again. but she was so self centered and selfish that she did not care whom she hurts..i meant nothing to her, just another guy that crossed her path again..our history did not matter .. it was all about her..she made sure i knew this also...so Cris once again thank you and i truly hope our paths never cross again. !!!!
  9. sukerbut
    I want to share my progress with all my friends that are on here heart broken and feeling sad and blue..Its going on to nearly 5 months and i finally have started to slowly get her monkey of my back..the road has been long , there were many sleeples nights but now i want to thank her..THANK YOU CRIS..thank you for breaking my heart, thank you for making me 100 times better than i was before..thank you for setting me free and allowing me to becoem ME again..i post this picture not to show off, but so all you can witness what heart broken determintion has lead me too..in 4 motnhs i have compeltly revamped my body..22 pounds lighter and still going...i am fuled by fuery .. every day for the past 4 motnhs YOU cris have helped me become this better person and finally i have arrived were i want to be...content and happy and actually greatful for not being in this toxic engagemnt we called a relationship. there were many many days at work that i would hold on to hope..read and read the same post on getting back together..hoping , holding on to every word you said like it was a hidden clue to what you were feeling, but no more..because of you my network of old friends has grown stronger, my new network will probably with me for a very long time..i can say i can count on these people more than i could ever count on you and your flaky asss..not only was this a better trade for me, but will probably benefit me in the long term...my attitude has changed..happy , care free and ready to tackle life every day...and all becasue of you..so instead of sending this thank you letter to you , an undesrving person of my time, money and energy..i will share it with the people that need it most..total strangers that have been here for me..day in and day out..every day that i falsy believed that i was healed just to come back on here and confess to all what a fool i had made of myself...strangers i can count on...something i could never say for you..So cris and all myfriends here THANK YOU .. thank you for your patience, kindeness , and most importantly your senserity. I wish this will shed a lil hope in this endless dark tunnel some of you just started your journey on and maybe even encourage others to pick up the pieces and start moving on slowly. I LOVE U ALL
  10. sukerbut
    listen to hello ladies!!! the only way the real healing begins is when you get those butterflies in your stomach. again..with out talking to other girls you will never find the one that will bring these butterflies back...i have found that one..and even though its in its hatchling stage i can see me happy in a couple of months ..real happy. We were dumped because our exes found replacements for us...we chose to still love them..now its your turn to be happy...the only way you are going to heal is when you find some one else..PERIOD! i dont think we are saying your mission is to bed these women..i mean if it happens great but thats not the mission..finding a compatible partner to love is not an easy task and even though 9 out of 10 dates i have been on were busts..(and believe me at times i just wanted to give up..i did not) that 1 that was a total success was well worht my trials and tribulations with the first 9!! if i gave up on date 9 i would of not had 10..so as painful as it is .. you got to do it..never give up and never settle..EVER! cross your fingers this one could be the one that pulls me out of my hole..no go find the one to do the same for you..IWHB!!! The only positive thing about being dumped is that you have no regrets...like the dumper..you are free to love again..while the dumper will always have to question their descision for the rest of their lives...i know i dumped some one very special and i am haunted with it daily..good luck to all
  11. sukerbut
    After a while you learn the subtle difference between holding a hand and chaining a soul, And you learn that love doesn mean learning and company doesn mean security, And you begin to learn that kisses aren contracts and presents aren promises, And you begin to accept your defeat with your head up and you eyes open, with the grace of an adult, not the grief of a child, And you learn to build all you roads on today because tomorrow ground is too uncertain for plans. After a while you learn that even sunshine burns if you get too much. So you plant your own garden and decorate your own soul, instead of waiting for someone else to bring you flowers. And you learn that you really can endure... That you really are strong, And you really do have worth.
  12. sukerbut
    oh you have no idea....how much i hate her...how much she used me...how much she hurt me..and how selfish she is for hurting me so much and not even an apology...I firmly believe in karma it happened to me and it will happen to her...oh and she;s got alot coming to her..and i am not speaking on ymbehalf only...good ridance
  13. sukerbut
    this interaction was actually theraputick..i have never met some one so selfish..i thouht i was a bit self centered and selfish...wow this chick takes the cake...i should of never let her in the house when her mother kicked her out..i am almost tempted to collect the 200 buks she owes me!
  14. sukerbut
    yeah well my dumper was a ruthless bi____! read what just happened i posted it..i cant believe how cold this thing could be..its def..not human..humans have feelings..you would think she would be a lil remorseful after she did this to me 3 times...i fell in love with this person..what the hell was i thinking
  15. sukerbut
    as i posted i found her bracelet couple of weeks back in my pocket..i sent her an e-mail that read i found something of yours a bracelet yada yada maybe i can give it to you over a cup of coffee and no shenanagans on ym part..its been 4 motnhs i know teh alst time i saw you was a disaster but i think i can handle seeing you..oh i also bought something for you for your b-day a while ago, but i refrained form sending it because of the rocky patch in dec...well ig et a response today and it reads: i dont know how i feel about having acoffee but this coming week is really hectic for me anyways..maybe when i get back from LA we can figure it out. oh and speaking of bracelets you have one lodged between the center councel and the passenger seat in your car (THE NERVE!!!) it s not a big deal but if you could get it out that would be awsome (MAYBE IF YOU DIED THATH would be awsome also) talk to you soon then i respond: i sent you the bracelet via mail yesterday dont worrie about the coffee i have cleaned out my car since and have found nothing of yours sooy..as much as i love you i am sooooo happy we broke up her response: you are so bizarre. if you are constantly going to be this weird, hot and cold dont get in touch with me at all. i d rather that ! then have you write a nice email one day then be a jerk the next my repsnse: i am not bizarre yu know i care for you..i was trying to reach out and squashe everything with a cup of coffee and you have to make me feel like crap bout it..have a safe trip bizzarre is telling some one you love them in july and aug you are saying you cant imagine ever being with them thats bizareee..I knowyou dont feel what i feel but i fell for you hard cris..especially this time around ..i wanted to give my life to you,,so i apologize if i get this way YOUR EALLY HURT ME BAD!!! you knwo what that piece of dung replies? no remorse no apology excuse me fro not being sure whether i want to meet up with you..it seems since we broek up and i see you its a disaster and you know it WHATEVER thanks for mailing my bracelet this folks was the woman i am head over heels for..in a nut shell..these e-mail should tell you what i was dealing with..not even i am sorry..i know i hurt you...nothiung
  16. sukerbut
    GOOD POST!! I thought my roller coaster ride ended..but i was dead wrong..two weeks ago i wore my blazer..and low and behold what do i find? her bracelet that she lost and found at her cousins wedding and asked me to keep it in my pocket till we got home..we broke up the next week! its funny how any type of contact will set you back so much..i was doing good real good, then i go and find that bracelet..so i decided yesterday just to send it to her...she is a stranger now...someone different..some one that no longer cares about me and how i am doing...we shared many night in my bed..we traveled through half of costa rica...i have not heard from her since i told her to stop calling...i mean i can not be friends with some one that is holding my heart hostage...that would make me a masicist...once again CRIS!! I HATE YOU WITH ALL MY HEART! hate you for not seeing the light, hate you for not accepting all teh love and support i have to give, i mean i love the person i was with .. that imaginary perfect person that was with me. She also made me hate myself for falling in love with ehr all over again..how she recklessly talked to me about marriage when she knows how much i love her , set my dreams and hopes on fire just to douce them out with no show of remorse...how selfish she was to leave me and the week after call me crying after her mother kicked her out of the house..how she used me for shelter , support, and love just to wake up the next morning and make believe nothing happened..assuring me this was a one time deal...i can continue for hours but i have to get back to work...HATE is a strong word and i cant think of any better word i have for her..becasue i know if she ever came back i would probably melt and take her back liek a loser..so yeah i hope she never ever contacts me again..i hope i never see her again..as much as my heart wants to!! I HATE HER...with a passion
  17. sukerbut
    oh dont you worry she is out having the time of her life..liek a weight has been lifted from her back...we are here sulking in our misery..but thats how love works right? we can't control our feeling s for some one..if they were mutual we would not be clingy and suffocatiing..i know when we were a unit..she could not weight to see me..if she sent me an e-mail and i did not respond right away..she would be liek hey babe were were you i miss you..so why when we do that we are suffocating please..I HATE HEARING THAT! Things change..mine got a job...got out of college and decided she wanted to start her life with out me...we went from we are going to get married right baby.."your not going to break my heart are you" in july to "i cant ever imagine living with you never mind having kids with you" in sept..WOW What the F___! i think that were i am just dumbfounded how someone can be liek that in a matter of 2 months..oh did i mention the honey moon type vacation to costa rica in aug...I mean how do you do that to some one..how can it be so easy for you to change like that..Thats what eats me up inside every day..I JUST DONT GET IT..I REALLY DONT! i can assure you one thing though they are having the time of their lives with out us...and we pathetick saps are on here daily pooring our hearts out!! I know its not easy but we need to pick up the pieces .. I HATE HEEEEEEEER!! haha actually no haha i hate her
  18. sukerbut
    got back from vacation 8/15 started having little fights , i tried fixing the problems but she was purposly trying to piss me off so i could get her "i should dump you folder" bigger...started to be late consistently...lots of phone calls from old male friends that were squashed when we were good...after she would sleep over she would run back home..saw less of her consistently...finally blow out fight at a rest...9/18 after that it was basically over. for me what took the cake is when i called her twice with my phone and she did not pik up..then called with a restricted # she piks up , i hung up, call with my numebr again, no pick up, call with a resticted again she piks up....i hang up..then she calls me back and tells me my phone was in my bag and i did not hear you calling! so i just sai you heard the restricted numbers right.she started calling me insecure ..psycho, mad amn ..please B___ch i have played this game when you were in you diepers.sorry man..i knew something was fishy i had to find out for myself..after that i knew it was pretty much over! i should of dumped her a ss on the spot, but i failed to do that .ccause i loved her and wanted to work things out..i shpould of been a man, probably would of gotten more respect .. ugh dont get me started
  19. sukerbut
    cause if you did not do what you did..you would of became the powerless one...at least now you mean business...she has a man..she does not need to be chatting with other guys daily and receiving roses from them. once again good job.
  20. sukerbut
    GOOD JOB!!! you did the right thing..
  21. sukerbut
    when? i felt liek crap last night ... becasue i was thinking of how special i made her feel..all teh things i did for her as apposed to other women that lvoed me...and what did i get ... zero..i got betrayed..i swear that feeling of betrayal has to be the worst feeling.of you going all teh way for someone and them not caring if you exist any more!!.i am getting whats due to me..and i am glad i learned this lesson in life now...for the first time i am alone after 10 ys..and it sucks.i always had soemone loving me..even when she broke up with me the first 2 times i always had love and nerturing be it from an ex..or some one i wsa seeing..and now..its all unravelling and hitting me in the face..hard...I HATE HER!! I REALLY DO...i have my reasons...I wish she gets fat..i wish she gets used and abused..i only wish bad things to this new person that does not care...i mean the first time we broke up ..2 months later i had a huge accident on my motorcycle on the highway..she did not have the decency to call and ask how i was doing .. took her back 2 more times just to fall in nthis black hole again...only this time i am not 26 i am 30...she made me believe that i was safe with ehr..made sure to convince me that wewere going to get married...at 30 i would of not taken that risk if she did not make me feel a false sense of secutirty..SO YEAH I HATE THE FN' B%$%!!!
  22. sukerbut
    dude i really hate it when i hear i was too clingy and insecure and thats why she left me...for a long time i thought that was the case but its NOT! the only reason you acted like that nad i bet it was towards the end of the realtionship right? is becasue she made you feel like that !! don't ever forget it...i am a firm believer in that...i bet when she was so in love with you and everythign was great those insecurity problems were not there..but towards the end i bet she started fading and thats when you knew instinctivly the relationship was coming to an end...all of a sudden she is spending less time with you...less frequent focals..etc..so what do you do? you grasp on to dear life....am i wroing? i became insecure towards the end becasue of those reasons and guess what i was right!! circumstances change people...life, career and so forth sometimes the timing is not right or the love was not really there..as for the feeling ..if you lvoed this girl its going to stay in the pit of your stomach for a long a ss time!! 4 motnhs for me and soem days i still feel like crap...just buckle up that seast belt , try to reinvent yourself and hold on till the next One comes along!!! Good luck i know i need it..last night sucked...not becasue of me missing ehr, just me thinking of how good i was to her..the special things that i did for her as apposed to other women that loved me..and i did half the things for them as i did for this one..and she betrayed me..i think betrayal is the worst feeling...not only are you rejected by some one you love, but your are alos mad at yourself for letting yourself be so voulnerable when the relationship was not what you thought it was .. i think that feeling of foolishness is what stays with you for a long time..and it hurtsd brother..more hurt than eating asphalt on the highway...doing 80 wearign a t-shirt..trust me i know
  23. sukerbut
    tell her if she wants a friend to get a dog...dont be a fool
  24. sukerbut
    dude just be thankful you don't have to spend any cash this feb. actually i am pretty pumped about it
  25. sukerbut
    it will come with time...now that i am in my fourth month i realized..that i did nothing wrong...sometimes peope are good for each other only for a short period of time..i firmly believe mine thought she wanted a relationship with me..then got bored after her love meter became full...it took a long time for me to realize that i did nothing wrong...i eman we all make mistakes, but nothign differnet than any otehr relationship...its all about timing and love..you cant have love and not have timig i know iw as on the sides of both spectrums..the key is to focus on yourself and getting you back..rejection from a lovedone is very tough and thats why we become so weak and fragile...its not you it me!! well thats the truth..you did not change as a person, they did..and once you accept the fact that it was not you, but just the circumstances broke you apart then and only then will you be at piece with yourself. unless you cheated , beat or verbally abused..then it was nt your fault..she fell in love with you. but due to unfortunate circumstances...life, career, outside influnces (family , guys, and immaturity) they decided they just did not want it any more..thats fine ..Its ok ..get on with your life and start living it..MOVE FORWARD
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