LootieTootie

Part of healing is to leave her alone, that means leaving her mom alone. As much as you want her back, you are still in a state of self-pity, guilt and fear. You need to get over all those emotions, and the fastest way of doing is that is refocusing those energies to working on yourself. Sometimes medication doesn't help but that doesn't mean you should stop. You probably need to go back and get reassessed by a professional, and let them know what you were taking before and what your symptoms were. Sometimes you have to keep trying to figure out what works for you and your doctor is there to help you find that solution. Everyone is different.

I think you needed a breakup in order to have a breakthrough. Unfortunately. Keep the momentum going and every time you start to feel bad about how bad of boyfriend you were, realize that you were probably in no shape to be a good boyfriend any way. Now that you're working on yourself and improving, you're going to be a better person, better son, better student, better friend & better employee. All this is setting you up so when you have a new girlfriend, you have learned from your previous mistakes. You are going to be fine. And yes, exercise does help.

If you want to believe you can change her by having her make promises to you, you are going to be disappointed. The reason why you date someone is so you can get to know them. Their traits, their values, their flaws, etc. You test the water with them to see if you are compatible and if you actually can see yourself with this person forever. You don't go in to a relationship wanting to change someone or hoping they will change for you. When people go in to a relationship or they stay in a relationship hoping/believing the other person will change for them, it seldom is the case that the relationship is a happy or/and healthy relationship. She shown you her true self, and believe me, you will see more of it if you choose to stay.

You dodged a bullet. I would also chalk this to a learning experience. always listen to your gut feeling early on. I think you both knew you two were not compatible & for whatever reason you both forced it to just have it hit you back that this isn't going to work. She gave you more than enough signs that she wasn't for you, and vice versa. Listen to your gut!!

This early on... I hope you are still online actively searching for the next date and not just sitting and waiting on this guy? Are you open to dating multiple people at once?

Sorry but she seems to be a very inconsiderate, selfish and uncaring person. Basically you are dating an a**hole. Now she has shown you her true colors, what are you going to do?

One day at a time... Breakups are hard but there's light at the end of the tunnel. My husband always said, 'nothing more dangerous than a single guy at the dog park with a cute little pup to get all the ladies to swarm over.' 😄

Ok so now you told her you don't want to be used as her ego-booster until mr. ex or mr. her type comes along, are you going to follow thru? I am only asking because since you posted this, a lot of people have responded and gave you great advices and you are still talking to her or reaching out to let her know again 'that you're thinking about her'? Because you are not doing yourself any favor in making yourself super available to someone who is emotionally unavailable. This is the same thing about the military woman you met online. You need to really need to work on yourself and ask yourself some tough questions.

So this is what you know. 1. he doesn't know what he's looking for 2. has asked for sex nonchalently quite early 3. cancelled plan on you last minute 4. never taken you out on an actual date 5. only wants to meet at home Start withdrawing from this situationship and see if he pursues you more than just a "come over to my place" guy. If he still insist on you visiting him at home, cut the cord on this guy. He doesn't have the same dating goals as you, so do not force yourself to believe that he will come around.

The searching sucks... But when two people meet, chemistry is there, goals are mutual, & no second guessing - it shouldn't be hard. This girl is making it hard and that's your sign to date other people who are interested.

This guy is weird. I don't understand why you would delete someone's heart emoji to your comment "thank you" I would find it funny if I was in your shoes, and not look at it as rejection. There's really no words to people who do nonsensical stuff like this. It's better to just walk away.

She is fresh from a breakup and so I apologize, but you and your friends should not feel blindsided. Others have mentioned that it could have been when you both met and her feelings change. but I think she was always honest with you about not being ready. She might have liked the distraction but when you are healing from a fresh breakup, you're in a constant midst of mixed emotions about being ready and not being ready. Also, you should be dating women who are emotionally available. Your picker is a reflection of you. You might want to sit back and do some self-reflection before you throw yourself out there.

The keywords I keep seeing in your posts "afraid, weird, uncomfortable, anxious, insecure" Emotions like this isn't a good sign, dating or not dating. Like someone said, start practicing how to voice your needs and your expectations early on because these insecurities will manifest in to a lot of things you don't want happening (mixed messages which you have been giving). When you are being super intimate with someone who is showing interest in you more than a friend, it will be to your benefit to be honest and transparent, especially if the goal is to date and to progress to an actual relationship.

OH this reminds me of when I went to my friend's house and her dad was in his tightie whities and trying to have a conversation with me. It was so awkward and unsettling to say the least. Sorry Poster, but I believe you put your SIL and your husband in a situation that probably made each one of them feel awkward, uncomfortable and weirded out by your booty shorts.

Not sure what kind of foreplay you did but let me be very direct, sleeping in the same bed with a married coworker never pays off. You are going to see everyone at the water cooler and when you show up to mingle with them, they will all disburse. You and the coworker will be looked at unfavorably by everyone at the office, and guys are the worse when they find out a girl in the office was trying to hook up with someone in the office, and not just anyone, a married person. I've seen a coworker of mine have to take antidepressants and had to finally quit because she was getting harassed and low-key bullied from sleeping with a married co-worker. If you care about your job, your career - don't ever date/sleep with a coworker. It can get ugly. Especially if you date a coworker and it didn't end on good terms, it will get awkward when you see them or have to work with them.

No. Always go with your gut. If your gut is telling you this woman isn't that in to me, be willing to say "next!"

I think if she ever offers you an olive branch, you say 'I'm sorry too, and wishing you the best!" & if she asks "well, sorry for what?" you stop engaging from there. Why? I have been following your threads and I think you both keep going in circles and there's no end. One minute you both are buds and next thing you know it, she's upset with you. That's just my advice. I know you care a lot about her but sometimes things are better left unsaid.

Good to hear that folks are helping this poor man with the vet bills. His precious dog is lucky to have him. & the man is so lucky you and your husband was there to help. yes Pitbulls tend to be more aggressive and that's why owners need to do research when they're going to get a dog - know what the dog was bred for, know the breed temperament & other traits associated to the breed.

Wow this is just so sad. Is there a go fund me account for his pet bill? This is truly the owner's fault especially when you said the Pitbulls seemed scared of the owner. This is a big tell tale sign. I've seen abused dogs as the most loyal dogs because they are scared of their owners. My dog was bit by a pitbull while both dogs were on a leash, so the city did nothing about the pitbull. My dog didn't provoke the pitbull - in fact he was wagging his tail and prancing because he was excited about going to the dog park and the pitbull turned around and chomped his butt. I remembered waiting at the ER thinking 'crap now my dog is really going to hate all Pitbulls from now on.' Surprisingly getting bit never fazed him nor made him hate Pitbulls. One of his bffs is a pitbull. I really believe it's because we socialized him a lot. I remembered a lot of people telling me that Pitbulls are dangerous and using my dog's example as proof that they are just an aggressive breed. But dogs are just like humans. They have personality, quirks, and sometimes you just don't know what will set them off or freak them out. My dog doesn't like a neighbor of mine, and it's just odd (I'm starting to think it might be a smell associated to her?) This is the only thing/person he growls at. Other then that, he's on best behavior wanting people to pet him. Just to add another example of dog's unpredictability, regardless of their breed. An old friend of mine adopted a bully. She actually found him on the street and took him in. Kept him because he was "so calm and lazy." They had the bully for 4 months and one day, felt comfortable enough to leave the bully home with their yorkie. They came home to the lifeless body of whatever was left of the yorkie. She told me to never adopt a rescue because you don't know the dog's background. There some truth to what she said but I've been around dogs long enough to know sometimes you just don't know them even if you've known them your whole life. We like to train our dogs to be predictable or think they are predictable but dogs are very much entitled to have a mind of their own.

I might be jumping in to conclusions here but the writing is on the wall. Big age gap. The guy is in a different stage in life where he is trying to find himself and be independent. You on the other hand, you're already independent and a mother of 2 young men already. He is probably starting to feel like maybe he doesn't want to be coddle any more and wants to fix and figure things out on his own. It's common too for young 20 year old females who fall in love with an older man who is like a father figure to them too. Eventually they rebel when they hit their late 20s or early 30s and just don't want to be kept in a box any more.

I had to stopped reading this when you said you had to "call her out."

I echo DF... you don't know unless you bring her in to a vet. Sometimes a big stomach can just mean a bloated stomach from eating something harmful.

I am late to respond to this post, but just had this situation happened to me. My sister and BIL (along with their 5 yr old) invited me and my husband to stay with them at a resort for 3 days (this was a resort out in the mountains and ocean). I asked if it was pet friendly and they said no. So we said no without blinking. We could book another pet-friendly hotel but that costs too much money so we just said no. It didn't rub them the wrong way but they did pause to think about our quick answer. My advice is to know where you stand when it comes to your dog, and be reasonable about it. Our dog is a family member and if its outdoor area we are going to be in most of the time, we want our dog to hike and swim with us too. And if it's to someone's house, we always ask if we can bring our dog and know that some people don't like pets in their house. NEVER leave your dog alone in a hotel room. Most, if not all, hotels will not allow it.

Can I ask, when you spent last weekend with him, did you sleep with him? some people do lose interest after you sleep with them because they're not looking for a relationship. they like the chase and that's it.

You made the right decision. Wow this lady is a piece of work! Thank your lucky stars you found out what she really is before moving in with her.