LootieTootie

First off, Happy birthday! Secondly, I am sorry about your friends being flakes. Not making excuses, but that's just what happens. People get older and they get wrapped in their own little lives and care less about maintaining friendships. I also think folks on here have been telling you your friends succ and you should look for other circle of friends by doing extracurricular activities. Have you tried meetup groups?

Why ask him when it's written on the walls? Why pull away when he has already done that? Don't waste your time on someone who doesn't want to go all the way with you. He doesn't seem to care much about your feelings because if he did, he would have definitely put more effort in reaching out and being clear he is still in to you. This is his slow fade and you did nothing wrong. Sometimes people change their mind how they feel about someone during dating and that's ok. All you need to know is that he isn't for you and you're done investing time on this guy.

I don't think you're doing anything wrong. You two just sound incompatible and possibly have different love language. I also think he is complaining about something he doesn't understand about you... which isn't fair for you. I wouldn't disagree with anyone on here who might think he is trying to emotionally manipulate you to be more "lovey dovey" - which isn't you this early on in the dating stage. So yea, wish him well!

Oh dear, you really need to have standards. The reason why he doesn't see your worth, is because you don't even see your own self-worth. A guy who can play the guitar, crack jokes, cries about not knowing what he wants, is not a man to cry over. More or less, not a boyfriend or husband material. I'm just going to be brutally honest with you and that this man used you for sex. I've been there and met many of these guys - they have came in to my life and always the same pattern. They're lookers, have ton of hobbies that make them more appealing, charming and witty- but at the end of the day, they will never ever care about your feelings no matter how much effort you put in. Go have a big cry but before you hit 30, learn to love yourself first before you try to make someone love you. When you don't know how to treat yourself because you don't love yourself, you attract the wrong people in to your life. This means you gotta date yourself before you're ready for a relationship.

Okay this stands out. How long is a bit? I would recommend that if you are someone looking for something serious, then you don't entertain people who are just farting around on dating apps. Go straight to a meetup and politely tell them you're not wanting a chat buddy or penpal. You will quickly weed out the people who are not serious and you can also prevent unwanted drama with someone you've never met. Another question... how do you know he left you on read? Maybe he didn't get your last message? Technology is great but it has hiccups sometimes. So, to be fair, if you were waiting for him to reply to your last message and you waited a reasonable amount of hours/days for a response, then just send a "checkin in" text next time.

I am so sorry and angry for you. Like Seraphim said, there are laws that will criminalize anyone who exposes other to HIV knowing they are HIV positive: https://www.cdc.gov/hiv/policies/law/states/exposure.html So sorry and please dump her. She betrayed you to a whole another f up level.

People can change but I don't think she has. She keeps showing that she is all about herself and embarrassed about it later. I think you dodged a bullet.

She sounds extremely insecure or she doesn't seem in to you like you are in to her. What are the topics you would like to bring up but she keeps shutting down?

Never rule out your gut feeling but I wouldn't start accusing him or stalking him or snooping on his social media accounts. Have you both made time for date nights?

I've had bosses do this to me- assuming I did something when I never touched it. They would cc everyone. When I was younger, it would hurt my feelings to the point I lose sleep and would be fixated on it all week. Wondering why would my own boss think I was so incompetent or reckless I would do something so uncharacteristic of me. Or do they hate me and I don't know about it? Luckily, those experiences taught me to grow some thick skin and shrug it off. The last time a boss did that to me (in my previous job) I wrote her back right away and cc everyone like she did, "Unfortunately it wasn't me, because if it was, I would be able to retrieve it from my recycle bin." (She actually gave me stellar reviews after I left the job for a promotion.) I realized people who do that are people who lack tact and foresight, and should never be put in a position to lead. Being a boss now, if I don't know, I don't jump on someone and assume they did it. I ask them. I especially don't cc everyone on our team about it. And if I'm wrong or I made a mistake, I admit it. It's not hard saying "Ops my bad...had a memory lapse (like any normal person)..." or "I made the mistake of...." And I always THANK the person for helping me realize I made a mistake. IF people have a hard time admitting they made a mistake or may have erred, it's because they're insecure. A secure person admits it freely and knows it doesn't make them weaker than the person next to them.

I just one question.... How old are you both?

Hopefully you don't beat yourself up if he doesn't call you or text you. I get the impression you're anxious about this, so don't be. You're single so soak it in that someone you like got your number. Not sure how much experience you have in dating, but this is the nature of the game. And you tell yourself when it doesn't pan out the way you hope, oh well, carry on or NEXT! People are flakes, people change their minds and life sometimes get in the way, so as long as you take care of yourself by being kind to yourself, and don't let bad experiences define you - keep putting yourself out there because a lot of people find that attractive!

How old are you both? Just going from your side of the story... I think your girlfriend's reaction says more about her than about you or the relationship. I think you need to admit to yourself that she may be a bit high maintenance. People who get involve with very insecure partners do a lot of reassurance and coddling (not cuddling). She needs to own up to her overreaction and her insecurities. You can't fix that for her. She has to do it on her own.

Feeling_Bad, I think it's always terrible to break up during the holidays so I empathize. But you are a middle-aged woman with a 20-year old insecurities that's just eating you alive and the person who has front-row seat to see this self-sabotage is the person you love the most, your daughter. Poor kid. The problem isn't him, or being alone. The problem is you. You need to really focus on dating you. Treat yourself how you would like to be treated. Show your daughter that you can be a strong woman without needing a man or a coward to validate you. Show her the way to be strong and independent. Doing this, you will also attract a lot of men who see value in you and won't take you for granted.

Never procreate with a raging jealous who is as vindictive as a crazy ex girlfriend. I would just break up with this man. He doesn't seem to respect you and you're going through his phone and you should never have to or feel the need to. Are you staying in this relationship for the children?

When was your b-day party? I would re-introduce the idea of meeting your family again and see his reaction. Just your family, no friends.

Sorry Matt. But it appears this "friend" wants to be an acquaintance only. Not sure how old you are, but if you're young, get used to finicky people. They're all around us.

Have you introduced him to your family?

I would understand. Sleep is the reason why I can remember so well. Job-wise, I've been told I have a great recall. I am good with remembering dates, long-winded meetings with vague determinations and remembering even large amount numbers in the millions. So yes, I often get complimented for my memory by colleagues- but I do tell them, I put in my 8-hr sleep every night (it also helps that I don't have kids). The point I was making is that even if he would take me to the airport, I wouldn't want him to and I wouldn't do that to him. Also, doesn't mean it'll be safe for him. He works 12-14 hrs a night and very strict on his sleep schedule because even one night where his sleep has been disruptive, it might affect him that same day or/and possibly that same week trying to play catch-up on his sleep. There's valid reasons why he takes his sleep seriously and being a supportive spouse, I wouldn't plan a goofy time for a flight and use it as a validation test or measurement of how real of a man he is. That's just silly.

I really am with JMan and Bolt here. In my relationship, this would just be considered goofy (as JMan put it nicely) if me or my husband booked a flight at 4am. Sleep is REALLY important to both of us, mostly him. My husband is a regional driver for amazon, and this would just mess up his sleeping pattern. He always said "I treat my sleep like a business." Getting up around a time he is asleep, would mess up his sleep pattern but a worse case scenario, what if it messes up his sleep that same day he took me to the airport and he ends up falling asleep at the wheel? I couldn't do that to him. If there was no choice and he was the only one who had to take me, he would just take the work day off to be safe. But would I do that him? No because I would plan better or I would have talked to him so there isn't any hurt feelings. I think sometimes we see a relationship as tic for tac, but if the Poster had time to think about the booking and time to talk to her boyfriend about an arrangement, then maybe this problem isn't that he's a "wimp" - maybe it's more of lack of communication and lack of forethought

Sounds like a standoff... Look, one of you has to take that big step without the other. The question is who? You both say "I'm doing this or I'm doing that" but neither of you have made that big step to close that gap. My husband and I started off as long distance but I told him I wasn't going to do long distance for more than a year. He straight away moved out and lived in his car for 3 months while working 2 jobs so he could save up and move to my town. If there is a will, there's a way.

I'm not sure how much you and your friend talk about your dating life, but it sounds like you and her talk a lot and I am thinking you guys touch on a potential match(es) for you frequently. Here's my advice, and you might not like it. When someone close to you keeps ignoring you, dismissing you, or countering you because they have a different opinion about something, sometimes its best not to share any more with them. Talk about something else- the weather, weekend plans, a new show, upcoming events, etc. The reason why is because you stop listening to yourself. You can't be happy if you got other people telling you how you should think or how you should feel on a particular subject that plays a significant part to who you are. It's okay to share but when someone just can't stop beating you up for your "standards" - time to stop sharing, oversharing and redirect every time they bring it up.

I'm with the consensus here. I feel like this was good that it had happened now than later because it's early into the getting to know you stage that you can write this one off, and not have any emotional attachment to her.

Yes it's bad and it will get worse. If he hasn't, he will emotionally manipulate you to isolate you from your friends and family. Insecure people are paranoid and they know how to gaslight you - make you feel like you're the crazy one. I recommend you move back with your parents and tell your boyfriend you need to re-assess the living arrangement and figure stuff out. If he asks why you tell him the truth. That you don't feel like you can be yourself. You want to be comfortable being you in your home and know that you are being respected which also translate to "please do not go through my stuff and tell me how to dress." Don't be scare to stand up for yourself even if that means being a little assertive without getting emotional.

when I got engaged, my hubby got me an opal ring. I did tell him I prefer opal to diamond.