George82

I spent the majority of my marriage walking on thin ice, and that’s not something I want to go back to. It’s very early in rebuilding things and work needs done on both sides. One thing I do know is I wouldn’t put myself through this again.

Hi, just an update. We’ve been talking and spent some time together. It’s still early days and the signs are positive. We’ve spoke and not dwelled on the photos. Seeing them has had a negative impact on her self esteem, and I hate that I’ve caused her to feel that way. We’re moving in the right direction though which is good. My emotions are still raw and a bit all over the place though.

I unfollowed her straight away, the 2 photos were of her in lingerie. She’d posted many photos like that. I unfollowed her straight away without my ex asking me too. Through conversation she has admitted seeing the photos led her to feeling insecure and that maybe something was missing from our relationship that led me to liking the photo. That couldn’t be further from the truth and I’ve always showered her with lots of love and affection, every single day. Which makes it worse that she now doubts me.

No she never asked me, but had wondered. She popped up on her ‘people you mak know’ and it lead her to have a nosy. She scrolled through a few years of hundreds of photos and found 2 I liked. Now I’m not saying that makes it right it was only 2, I’ve admitted it was wrong of me to like the photos. As I’ve said before I’ve nothing to gain from lying on here, I genuinely don’t recall hitting like on the photos. I did though and I can’t change that. I guess she could assume that if she’s the only model I followed she’d be special, but I followed her from before she started her modelling career. I’ve never fancied her or been interested in her in anyway.

I know, I think these are the thoughts going through her head and making the situation worse. The thing is my IG is full of photos of me and my ex, I’m hardly going to be sending anyone signals. If I was surely I’d have liked more than 2 photos over a year apart.

No, I don’t follow anyone like that, other models, or woman I don’t know.

I’ve known the model for about 20 years, probably about 10 of that she’s been a model. I’ve never had any history with her other than knowing her from college, then mixing in the same circle for a while a long time ago. Can’t remember the last time I seen her in person and my ex has never met her in person. I think it is because I know her, it seems worse to her, may have been less of a reaction if it was stranger. I’ve actually just recalled my ex saying the other day that she thinks I may have sent the likes as signal to her. I think it would take more than 2 likes over a number of years to send a signal. She’s never asked me not to like photos like that before, I guess she just expected it of me. Hand on my heart I’ve not looked at things like this before, and have no interest in it. I wouldn’t even follow the model had I not known her for so long.

If she is I would be surprised but just now I can’t rule anything out. I’d like to think she’d be better than that, but the more this goes on I’m not so sure. We’ve spoke and I’ve asked on more than one occasion if there’s more to this than the 2 photos. She’s assured me that it’s just this. I’ve always believed her to be open and honest, she never given me reason not to trust her. But maybe I didn’t know her as well as I thought. To be honest there’s so much going through my mind just now I don’t know what to think anymore. I’ve never given her any reason not to trust me or to be suspicious of me as I’ve never been anything other than devoted to her. She doesn’t see it they way over these 2 photos though. I’m both angry and frustrated, angry at the pain I’ve went through and frustrated that she thinks I’m a totally different person over 2 liked photos.

It’s so confusing as we’ve been speaking on the phone once a day since Monday or Tuesday. Last couple of days have been better and we’ve avoided going over old ground. She’s adamant she wants to fix it and still talks about us in a future tense, although I think some of that is force of habit. I just don’t know exactly where I stand, and I’m not pushing her for answers as I know that’s not the right thing to do. I’ve got my kids staying over until a Tuesday now, so that gives me a perfect chance to withdraw myself from the situation and focus on my children.

It will only work if she can forgive me and move on, it won’t work if she will use it as something to bash me with in the future. At times I feel as if I’ve actually cheated on her. I’m giving her time and space, and she’s telling me she really wants it to work, I have to take her word for it. She’s never lied to me before, I’ve always felt we’ve had an open and honest relationship with each other. Even this scenario, it wasn’t me getting caught out hiding something, I’d rightly or wrongly liked 2 photos that are there for anyone to see. No, we don’t live together. That’s mainly for financial reasons, as the size of house we’d need for us and our kids is at this moment not something we can afford. I stay at hers a lot when I don’t have my kids, her kids don’t see much of their dad so are there most of the time so easier if I stay at hers.

The 2 photos I liked are of a woman I’ve known for 20 years, the last 10 she’s been a model and posts a variety of pics. I’ve liked 2 of them and it’s triggered something in my partner. We are talking again and taking small steps in the right direction. We went a walk yesterday and it was nice, however when we got back to hers it turned sour as we started going over the same things. She says she wants to forgive me but isn’t sure how she can shake how’s she’s feeling. I hope in time that will change. The 2 photos I like meant nothing to me, but are a big thing to my partner. I accept that I shouldn’t have liked them regardless of whether it was a split second thing or not. Just not sure how we move forward if she can’t get over it.

I’m guessing as the likes were on a public profile and I wasn’t hiding anything or being dishonest, then she’s not lost trust in me. Buy maybe faith that I wouldn’t do anything to hurt i.e. liking pics of someone wearing sexy underwear

When When I spoke to her on the phone earlier this evening I asked her if she still trusted me to which she replied yes. She went on to say she’s lost faith in me and she’s not sure she can get that back. When she seen the photos it made her feel like I’d liked them as there was something missing and that she wasn’t enough for me. That certainly isn’t the case. I asked her if I’d ever made her feel like that in our relationship, she again said No. I’ve always tried my best to make her feel special and loved, every single day. I’m feeling a bit more hopeful after her reaching out again and how the conversation went. I think when she looks at the bigger picture she’ll realise that 4 years is a lot to throw away over 2 likes that were split second reactions. My heads fried with it, good thing is I’ve lost the extra Christmas pounds I put on.

She’s just called there upset saying she doesn’t want to lose me, but she doesn’t know how we can fix it or if she can forget it.

No, no other problems. We were very good at communicating and speaking through any issues that arise. I don’t believe she was looking for an out, not with how things had been, the last year was the best of our 4 together. We were becoming closer if anything, she always showered me with love and affection and that only grew throughout the relationship. My actions have really hurt her, I hope in time that pain will subside and she’ll want to make a go of it again.