Doctor Smurf

Thank you both very much! Well I've been through it with her several times before, but never had such a reply from her in the past. I think if she doesn't take it from this and comes back in the same fashion I'll just have to do as SilverManiac says. And I do take your point about the disadvantages of text, I'll definatly take that one on board! Thanks again.

Hi all. I've known this girl for about a year and a half, and when we first met in college she was obviously attracted to me, and pretty much asked me out. Not often that happens to me I know, but in about two weeks certain members of staff attemtped to cut us off for legitimate and obvious reasons - I was fourteen, she seventeen. Since then we rarely see each other but hardly a day goes by when we don't text her, I've tried so many times to stop her being sexual towards me because I don't feel that way about her anymore. I want to stay in contact with her, but just not like that! I tried to bring it up last night by text, and it ended up something like: (From her) I really feel a lot for you, and I know we can't be, not at the moment but ow do you feel? I responded by telling her that I thought we where best as good friends, and that when ever we have done anything sexual together we end up obsessing over whether it was "right" or not afterwards. The reply was simple: "Fine, be like that. Good night." She has since apologised, which I'm happy to accept, but I really want to not be so physical with her! How can I tell her that, whilst not being unkind about it? ](*,) Thanks so much!

Hi mate! I've felt and to a certain amount still do feel the same as you. I know its one of the most hopeless feelings, just not being attracted to anyone, but in the end it will pass. I now know of someone I like 'that way', still not entirely made up my mind whether or not I'm worthy of asking her out or not.... My two penneth. Doc

I thought only other guys said that! Well thank you for the kind words both, much appreciated I can promise you that! Oh, AntiLove_SuperStar, thanks for the compliments! Hopefully things will go on the up soon. Thanks again! D/S

Hi Michele! Thanks for that lot, I did consider that side of things maybe a lot more of it is a natural state of mind than I first thought. Good call there, my Dad introduced me to some older literature (Thomas Hardy at the moment) and I've really enjoyed reading that sort of stuff. I suppose at least I'm not doing drugs and as you say, there are some good things about... It will improve I guess.. Thanks

Hi all... I've been having some trouble with my life just recently. A bit of background for you – I've been home educated from the beginning, never seen the inside of a school. I've started doing part time and evening college since last year, I'm not having problems in that respect as I was awarded department Student of the Year last year, and I've continued in the evening for this year. In September I go to the local school for sixth form, and that's going to be my first time in a school. I go to Air Cadets in town, which I'm not enjoying a huge amount at the moment, and I'm in two minds whether to stay or give it up, I'm waiting for my Gliding Scholarship to come through (Week long course of pilot training) and I'm planning to leave after that. I started work when I was thirteen, and I've been in the same job as a pool and gym attendant for nearly 3 years now. I enjoy working out myself, but I'm finding it harder to get motivated in that and every other respect in my life too. I don't have many friends, and I think the crucial reason is where I live – In the middle of the countryside, 10 miles from town. I can only transport myself cycling, so 10 miles out is about manageable. What made me make this post in the end is that my scholarship did come through, but then I was told a week later (Today) that it was an admin error, the place was never mine. I seem to have been through a series of disappointments like this, and I've just felt pretty depressed and down about life for the last month or so. I feel like I've got nothing to look forward to, and now with a 10 month wait again for the scholarship, and a year until I can get a car, it all just seems a bit worthless. The longest I've ever stayed with a girl was 1 month, and that was pretty fraught throughout. Just something to live for and a little fun would be nice I think, but I've no idea how to sort my life out I guess. Any advice for me? I hope I made sense, its nice just to able to share it a bit I guess. TIA Daniel

I agree, its a guy enjoying a fantasy without hurting anyone, and I think its the sort of thing we (Or I at least) would be embarrased about other people knowing of, so looking at a man with a woman is a little off putting I think. I don't find that lesbian sex in itself is particularly arousing, other than in the forbidden fruit way already mentioned, I prefer other single female porns such as striptease. But thats just me. DS

Thanks very much all, especially Chai, I will relay all info.

Second Opinion, stereotypical as it may sound, any guy who is worth your time will be happy to listen and sympathise with your problems, and if you want it to be confidential between you any decent fellow should understand. I know your fear of gossip, where I live it is rife and it hurts when your the butt of it, but at the end of the day many people don't believe it, particularly those that matter. This will sound a bit strange but are you tired, working nights or something? A good nights sleep has always helped me to brighten my outlook, and it would make you feel better about yourself too, I'm sure. Hope I help.... DS.

Lol the announcement was a bit of a joke Yes he has spoken to her, but only whilst being served at her till. The going in off work idea sounds great to me, he says that he may as well ask her in uniform though 'cos either way theirs going to be a queue of customers behind him. ?? Cheers again!

Hi! Post on behalf of my 20 year old brother (Tom). He works in a UK branch of Morrisons supermarket (On pie shop counter). He's got a crush on a girl who works on tills (Beth) who is also 20, and he believes is single. However she starts after, and finishes before he does, and he has no idea how to approach her because he is kind of tied to his counter during shop hours. Only options we can think of is for him to take a chance to try and catch her as she leaves or two write down his number and give it to her on her till and ask her to call him. Either way seems a tad un-subtle lol Or I sugegsted to him he could get a staff anouncement put out asking her, but the fall-out of her saying 'No' would be appreciable, and everyone would know immediately. Can you help him out? Cheers all!

Hi SBD! I'm a similar age to you (16 - 3 days ) and I certainly now how you are feeling about 'em! Naa happens to us all at some time. Sure your only going to get one shot at ur education so take it. I'm not sure from your post if you want to go out with the hot (2nd) girl or not. I'm familiar with the scheme's like your canteen queue, but what if she had no change etc..? Far better IMHO, although far harder just to be a little more direct. I know I live in a bit of a different culture to you but I find girls are taken aback by an offer of a handshake, might seem a bit strange at your age though. Just saying 'Hi, I'm Daniel...' offer my hand worked great for me! Otherwise a grerat chat up line is 'You look nice'. No shame is telling someone they look good, but it shows you fancy her too. Has that helped you at all? Cheers all the best dude!

Hi.. I'm really want to take a chance and try my luck with a girl I 'know' at work. Her name is Emma, and AFAIK she is my age and we think single. Here's the hitch - I, along with many other staffs only saw her for the first time at our Staff Christmas Party on the 4th of December. At the time I didn't speak to her, so here's the problem - She's on the cleaning department, so they work 9 until they finish on Saturday. Thats the only time I see her, and AFAIK she doesn't know me, and I'm also concerned after the alchhol clouded senses of the party I won't recognise her. I'm almost sure I can't get her alone, and even then not for long. What should I do? I could ask another friend to organise a meeting between us, but that has extra risks of what they might play on me. I need some advice here. More info can be supplied if I've missed anything. Thanks a bunch!

Maybe I'm suffering from a touch of 'Grass is Greener' syndrome here, but I feel that none of the local girls are attractive to me! My girlfriend lives in Swansea (SW Wales) which is a fair distance so we rarely see each other, and only then briefly. Consequently I'm more than a little dissatisfied with our relationship. Its sad because she is the kind of girl I would like a long term thing with, but it can't really happen the way we are. Apart from that I went away to England recently, and noticed far more girls there of the type I would flirt with. I work with non-local people (Holiday resort), and I have noticed the same there. Am I dissillusioned or what? Then again I do live in the country and thereforeeee don't meet as many of the opposite sex as I perhaps do on trips away. What is my problem? Thank you all!

Your right there on all points RayKay! You lady cyclists - so lucky No it won't stop me, I've been hurt doing it before and I enjoy it too much to stop! Nothing broken (on me) yet, touch wood! Thank you all for your support!

OK thank you both very much! I'll do that then, and unless I get problems I won't bother with the doc's. Cheers!

Last time I was in a situation like that I told the girl how I felt, but that I appreciated she had a BF. She was very understanding, and in the end they split up and we went out. For a bit... Try that.

Hi! I suffered a cycling accident yesterday which involved steel contacting the underwear area... It hurt like nothing I've ever felt before, but seemed ok. In the shower I took a better look, it seems that I have about 1/2 a square inch of skin missing from the underside of my scrotum, but everything else still seems fine. Its since scabbed over, so I assume there's nothing to worry about? Just want some piece of mind! Cheers all (ow!)

I think it will, if only because it shows you know a little about her. I think this was the best advice given on the subject: PocoDiablo, respect! Daniel

Hi all. I'm not too sure if this is my problem, if you see something underlying please say! Anyway: I have been single since this time last year, and I feel kinda lonely and like I've got a lot of love to give to someone. The someone is the problem.I see girls that I think Hey, she's hot, but on closer inspection of her there's always some kind of thing I don't like - that's not to say I don't accept faults! It could be something that I don't like, or as with my ex, my parents didn't approve. What can I do to find a nice girl that will love me back as I would her? I'm thinking of going into town with a single mate to try and pull, but I'm not sure that's best. I know what kind of girl I like (I think? Not too sure there). How can I do a little better? Please help. Daniel

I see what you mean and we've both had times when we needed eahc other for support. Should I continue to try to find someone my age, or wait until I'm old enough to see her sensibly? Thanks for your posts!

This is kind of a combination of two issues, and one of them I have been trying to ignore for too long now. It will be quite hard but I will try and be honest with this. I met a girl in college last year when I was 14. It was obvious from the first time that we set eyes upon each other that she had feelings for me. A week later she asked for my number, and from then we embarked on a relationship. The only conceivable problem with that is that she was 17. Our tutor got wind of what was happening and she brought it to the attention of my father. He judged it as inappropriate, and he spoke to us together. He kind of explained why, but the outcome was that there was no way we could go out together. Not out of spite for my Dad, but feelings can't always be controlled and a year later we are still very close. We agreed that we shouldn't go out, but we have always been very up-front and flirty, even to the degree of holding hands in class and stuff. Looking back on it I guess it was wrong. We finished college together at the end of term last year, and stayed in contact. Just recently we decided to meet up, and she came to where I work without knowledge of either of our parents. In hindsight it may have been an error of judgement, but I feel wrong saying that because I enjoyed it so much. That evening we ended up making out together. That was two weeks ago, and since then she has been texting me in an increasingly sexual manner. I responded to it, and we had a really nice chat on the phone the other night. I am coming up to my 16th, and her 19th, so the age gap is still far too prohibitive. This is where my second issue comes in, being that I would be so happy to have a girlfriend my own age. I feel that whilst I am the way I am towards this older girl I couldn't be dedicated to a lasting relationship no matter how much I wanted it, because I do love her. How can I tell her that we should cut out a lot of the sexual things between us without making it sound bad? Because to hurt her would break my heart, she means so much to me. I plan to take her as my guest on our staff Christmas dinner, (Which my father knows and agrees to) and I definitely can't have her coming on to me then! What can I say to her, considering that meeting up isn't an option? Because I feel that until I get some space from her, not that I want to that much, I will be unable to find a girl my age. Will I ever meet someone similar to her my age? I have come to doubt it somewhat. Is this a normal thing to happen to a guy of my age? I mean I have always liked older women, but a year later I am in quite deep with this one! And I like her so much! Please help me to straighten this out… Thanks for your time, respond as honestly as you can!

Thanks thats exactly the stuff I was after! 8)

I may be put in a postiion where it would be nice to give my GF the privilige of oral sex... 8) What risks am I running, and what protection should I be taking?? Equally when she does me, should I be using a condom or not? And again, what could happen? Thanks!