Borashi

My g/f called me today which was the first time all week since Tuesday night when she told me she didn't know what she wanted out of the relationship, she has told me she still thinks about me a lot and although we aren't in a serious relationship anymore will still remain friends in hopes that once we both grow and are ready to settle down maybe we'll come back to each other. I just feel like I need to let her go so she can grow and blossom into something beautiful, I also feel that being selfish will never get my girl back, the key is both of us growing in our own ways and then once we both are happy with ourselves then we might get back together in a serious way.

Anyone here have a personality that craves always taking risks? The reason I ask is because I've always been a risk taker looking for that thrill or adrenaline rush kick to get me up almost like a drug in a way. I used to be a compulsive gambler because I was addicted to the thrill of blackjack. Now I drive fast and push the limits beyond what a normal person does. I mean whenever I'm on the freeway and I get the chance to take it to the limit so to speak I do even if that means reaching speeds of 95-100 mph + while driving. I just feel I get bored with things really easily thats why I'm still searching for that career that'll give me a daily dose of adrenaline, thrill, and excitement without the same daily routine of things... Now I'm putting my risk taking ambition towards a positive goal of starting my own online business. Anyone else like this in their career or personal life?

I think their will be a high demand for private security due to the terrorism thats increasing around the world, also I think their will be a high demand for nurses due to the ever increasing U.S. population, also I believe their will be a high demand for private investigators... Las Vegas is expected to be the city with the largest amount of job growth in the next five years, I've read around 40% which isn't suprising when you consider that its the fastest growing metropolis in the U.S.

Here are a few great books about self improvement that'll help you dramatically: Think and Grow Rich with peace of mind by napoleon hill, this book is a classic that I feel everyone should read if they ever want to achieve peace of a mind, its not a book you can really read in a day, you have to contemplate a lot of what he says. We're all doing time by Bo Zoloff this is an excellent book about spirtuality focuses a lot on people who've went to prison and have changed their lives for the better, its an inspiring read. How to stop worrying and start living by Dale Carnegie

I'll start off by saying that I really thought I'd developed a connection with this girl who was also like my bestfriend, but tonight when we were talking she started telling me how confused she was about the relationship and she said we should slow down and just be friends. Why do girls hide their feelings rather than be upfront about it, if she would have told me this from the very beginning I wouldn't have tried to pursue something more serious with her, now I'm left heart broken and she's just moving along like its no big deal... I can't help being selfish about my needs, I seriously treated her really well for 4 weeks and she grew close to me and I think that she reached the point were she felt she was getting so close she was actually going to open up to me at a really deep level and so she decided to run, thats why she gave me the talk? I'm just grasping for reasons to understand...

My definition of a relationship is a partnership between two people which forms a bond that can't be broken. I think to be in a relationship besides having to love yourself, you need to view your partner as your equal, you need to be able to make compromises and you have to be able to communicate effectively without hurting your partner. I don't feel you need to have a million things in common to have an effective and truly loving relationship, I think its even better when you have differences as then you learn more about that person which is exciting in itself. I think in a relationship you need to be willing to make sacrifices, you need to be willing to make time for your partner, you need to be willing to work at a relationship combining passion, communication, and dedication. I think the only constant in life as well as in a relationship should be "change" I think if change doesn't occur and your in a relationship to settle then it'll never last. I'd like to hear other peoples opinons on what they think their definition of a truly loving and fulfilling relationship is

I'm currently in a relationship with a girl I care a lot about. Shes had a pretty messed up past and at times shes really distant around me. She's talked about a lot of her past but there are 3 years in her life that she just can't seem to talk about because its too painful for her. The last 2 times she has tried talking to me about it she became really quiet, non responsive, really just shut down, and cried. I want to be there for her in that way, but I feel if I know what happened I can at least understand more about her and maybe help her with the pain even though I know I'll never be able to experience what she went through as a child. Anybody have any advice or suggestions on getting her to open up?

No I dont get headaches or anything like that, that instance that happened yesterday is a rarity for me, I'm a pretty calm nice person otherwise, thats the first time thats happened since last summer when I just blew up at a party. Doesn't everyone lose it occasionally? Thanks

Sometimes things can set me off to the point where I'll just explode, first I'll be angry, then I might start crying and once I start I can't seem to stop. I then get real quiet, and remain on edge. Like today I was getting back from driving my route, I was headed to my work headquarters, I bumped into a friend whom works with me. He said one little negative comment to me and I just blew up, I felt like I could feel no pain and if I didn't hit the walls like I did, I feel like I would have shattered his face, for a while I just felt like I wanted to knock everybody out. I guess my question is once you snap like that can you contain your anger or get back in control? For instance once I explode, I then stay sad its like my mind gets caught up in the anger and then at times I feel like I can't stop crying even though I'm already over the issue that I was angry with.

This theory is taken from Michael Connellys Harry Bosch Novels. The single bullet theory is that you can be pierced with one persons bullet that'll touch your soul like no one else ever has, knowning that she/he was the one true connection in your life, the one that came closest to seeing your hidden secrets. The one that touched you the most, knowning that you can make love and fall in love again, but you'll know it'll never be as sweet, never be as beautiful, as that one who got under the wire. What are your thoughts on this theory? I definitely believe in the single bullet theory, this one girl touched my soul like no other, the love between was so beautiful, even though we never made love, I've always felt like she was the one that came the closest to seeing the real me, she was able to get under the wire and into my soul. She was a beautiful person, who I'll love forever even if we aren't together as I realize things aren't always meant to be.

I totally agree with you that nice guys never finish or they finish last so to speak, any girl I've ever gotten was through being assertive. Like my ex g/f for example, I got her by chasing after her even while she had a b/f at the time, I just didn't care, I just wanted to show her that I cared, eventually it worked as she noticed how hard I was trying to be with her. Looking back at all the relationships I've been in, the ones that have lasted the longest are the ones where I was the most assertive, not the ones I just felt comfortable in.

I agree that everyone goes through depression at some point in their life, whether its a loss of a loved one, or getting fired from your job or a car accident. The key is to keep your mind on other things. My depression situation varies on a day to day basis, when I'm at my job I really don't notice it, at times my depression and pain is a comfort to me as I feel no one can get to me, but feeling that empty at times also makes me sad. I'm the type of person who'd rather be alone most of the time than go out, I used to fight my depression with drugs, drinking, sex, now I turn to a more positive activities: exercise, working out, reading, video games. I'm a huge crime fiction fan and reading allows my mind to escape from the everyday pressures of life without hurting my body physically and emotionally. Sometimes though I get trapped in my depression, where I feel like I have to strip myself down, be at my saddest level just to be pure. Another strange thing about me is that if another person I know is going through a painful situation a lot of the time i'll try to take that pain away from them and put it on myself so to speak. Like I've known a lot of girls through-out the years that have been sexually abused, and when I hear there stories, I feel like being the punisher/protector so to speak. I feel like getting "justice" for the victims, the ones with the hidden secrets. Theo

I'm really good friends with a girl that I've known for years. She really blossomed from 15-17, the guy she was dating at the time got more insecure as she became more attractive, grew into herself as a women. They dated for 2 years but his insecurities ended the relationship. Trust is always an issue in a relationship if its soley based on looks, then its not a real relationship its just fake in my opinon. Yes you have to be attracted to your signifigant other but if its just based on looks it'll never last. As for what you wrote: wlfpack81 wrote: I don't know how being good looking can be a disadvantage. When you're considered attractive by the masses then basically you can pick and choose who you want to date and when. I do agree that when your good looking, you can pick and choose, but at some point in time your going to have to look beyond looks to get into a serious relationship. I've been in love a few times, but I don't believe that there is the perfect girl out there for me, I do believe in soul mates, but there is a difference. The problem with our society these days is the media, mtv, the way everything is marketed in the media makes us believe that we have to look a certain way to be accepted in society. This is morally wrong and I feel the longer it goes on the more fake people are going to be with one another. wlfpack81 wrote: When you're not attractive you have to come up with something else to make up for your physical shortcomings like having a nice car, money, etc. to woo a girl (if you're a guy). The problem with your theory is whats your definition of attractive? Everyone has a different opinion on what is attractive to them. For instance I find tan brunette girls with brown eyes very attractive, I might look at a girl down the street and think shes hot, while you may think shes not. I hate to admit that your right if you have looks, a nice car, and money, a lot of women will go for that. I think using your looks to get you further in your career and personal life aren't wrong at all as I feel thats just a part of money, power, and respect, the three things men compete for the most.

I can't give you a reason why people play games, but I've definitely played games before in relationships. I'll give you an example with my last relationship. My soon to be g/f at the time was dating this other guy, well once I found that out, whenever he was at work, I'd hang out with her and spend time with her to show her that I cared, I ended up forcing their break up and so she fell in love with me, I think I liked the challenge and being able to feel the power of taking her away from another guy. I think it was the chase to me that was exciting. Do I feel bad for my actions? Not really as I've been hurt before in the past and I just didn't see nothing wrong with my actions. The funny part is I broke up with her in the end, because I felt like we were only using each other for sex. I think I get bored with relationships easily and thats the reason why I do this cause its exciting and fun, I don't think about the other people I could be hurting. Theo

I also am my own worst enemy at times, I go through bouts of depression where I feel like I have to tear myself down just to get to my purest level. I'd say a lot of the time I have self doubt/pity about myself. It definitely has held me down in friendships and relationships. At times it feels like my world is crumbling beneath me. I'll be negative to myself at times for no reason. I might have bi polar, the only escape I really have is exercise, music, and driving fast. I remember a special friendship I had with this girl that meant a lot to me, but I think my casual bouts of depression scared her away. At times she'd wonder what was wrong with me, then in turn I'd make up an excuse just to hide my depression. Theo

I feel that I definitely display the characteristics of this disorder, fear of critism, intense fear during social interactions with people I do not know, if I don't have anything to say when I'm in a group, I don't say anything at all, if I'm in a large group of people and I'm nervous I start to sweat at times. I've thought about seeing the doctor about this and asking to be put on a mediciation like paxil but at the same time I feel this might just be my personality. For people who have SAD, what steps did to take to correct this disorder? Did you feel that once on medication it merely covered up your disorder? When did you realize you had SAD? What do you do to cope in social situations? Theo

I wish I could take away the pain that you feel I want to hold you in my arms and tell you its going to be okay I know I'll never realize the pain you've been through Your world has shattered, your trust in humanity is gone, you stay distant All I want to do is protect you and show you the way While the rage inside of me explodes I promise I'll never forget For one day the truth will be known As you ask god why? Don't let the fear hold you down Stand up for what you believe in Knowing that I'll always be there Im just starting to write poetry again, I'm no edgar allen poe but it helps me release my emotions, thanks for reading. Theo