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twelve

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Everything posted by twelve

  1. twelve
    thanks thats also something i figure, im only going to look a lot better than i do now huh.
  2. twelve
    hi all, in short, i have been out of contact with the best friend i ever had for about a year and a half now. i have changed A LOT. i feel like a new and more rational person. we had a very close close bond, but in the end had a falling out and could not see eye to eye for the first time. we reunited briefly after about 7 months, then we had a very nasty fight because i was pushing for things too much and didnt see it then, and i regret the huirtful thinsg i said. i said things like, im sick of your **** and i want closure and this is your loss. can words like this be forgiven? i can see how i caused this to happen even tho she was also at fault, and have written a letter of apology that has taken me about 6 months to write. tomrrow is her birthday and i was thinking of sending it, wihtout even mentioning her bday, but it will obviously be a gift. i am so so so scared of rejection as what keeps me barely here is the hope that we can reconcile, and if i never heard back,id be so very surprised (as she loved me a LOT), and also so hurt and depressed i cant even describe it. any thoughts on whether an apology can change things?i know if she wrote me, id forgive the things she said, but still, i cannot bring myself to do it I just wish so much that I could show her how much I have changed. any advice appreciated
  3. twelve
    So what happened?
  4. twelve
    ie dont be around whenever she calls if you are, only be there for your son
  5. twelve
    I would tell her that you understand it is hard for her right now but she also needs to consider you in this. Tell her it is painful living in limbo like this and tell her to make her decision. It is wrong of her to muck you around. Sounds like she wants you back but she has no guts telling the guy. And that is not something you should have to suffer because of. A tactful stern word and a huge backoff is needed here. You need to make her thnink she could lose you if she delays too long.
  6. twelve
    It actually doesnt sound too bad, though im not belittling your pain in any way, I understand you must be feeling pretty bad about the siutation because she is with another man. To be honest, it doesn't sound like shes really into him, and he sounds like a bit of a loser. Things look promising, but do protect yourself please and meet other people and don't wait around for her, and let her see this, even if in your head you just want to be with her. Be happy around her, confident, and successful, and busy. Don't look to be too available for her all the time is my piece of advice. How are you feeling now?
  7. twelve
    rest of his life at 15? thats intense. maybe you guys will get back in the future but for now I see you needing time to just see different people and be young and free. Tell him you are not ready for a serious relationship now. If you are meant to be, he will be there when you are ready. ooo blow jobs *yuck* hehe
  8. twelve
    good valuable advice there. no presents though.
  9. twelve
    exactly
  10. twelve
    Welcome Flynnz OK. What I would do is ask her straight out what she means by give it time. Stress that you have NO PROBLEM giving her time, but the fact that she is with someone else makes you very confused, and you dont want to wait around if she is witrh someone else. Tell her you are afraid of being her back up plan. Say you would wait as long as she wants and that there is no pressure, but this other person is making you confused and could she communicate more with you.
  11. twelve
    Not really, the advice I gave is what I think you need to do. Someone who is constantly available is not a turn on, its a huge put off actually. I dont mean IGNORE her, but dont be so there all the time, do your own thing. Back off. Then, if she wants to be with you she will come to you. If she doesn't well you have your answer then, and at least you wouldnt have made an a$s out of yourself Thats my advice, take it if you want, after all, it's what you are here for isn't it?
  12. twelve
    ah i see what you mean tryingtobestrong. Yeah work is a bad place to do it
  13. twelve
    the opposite. the opposite happens. you forget the bad and dwell on the good. its human nature.
  14. twelve
    Hi K@t. oh too true, thats what i think too but ive been having time to myself not going into anything new for some time, but i feel hopeless now like its no point. I have many friends, am working hard toward a degree in a field I love....but i feel this longing that wont go away and i was told when we rekindled that i was the only one ever too...before the fight. *ramble* LOL thanks for your advice its really nice getting it
  15. twelve
    thank you for your advice, i think you are right here. I said some pretty nasty things and handled my emotions BADLY but i did it as a reaction to being played with emotionally. I thought, being the dumper, *told them where to go lol*, I would have to be the initiator of anything again, and id love more than anything to get back together. But you are right, I need to deal with these guilty feelings, thank you How do you mean I would go about that, any tips? I thought an apology...but that is a HUGE risk. PS: i didnt cause the break up, i contributed to it though with my mouth
  16. twelve
    ok as hideous and even funny as porn can be, it shouldn't be banned from guys or women because sex is human nature and i guess fantasy is too. but INCEST???? Thats just plain wrong and freaky. Get out
  17. twelve
    ps: it sounds too much like you are trying to prove how much youve changed *which isnt a bad thing* but i think if its a sincere apology because you do feel bad for hurting her you need to tailor it more towards her. what do you think> just my impressions
  18. twelve
    im in a similar situation - i said some stupid stupid things that i regret in a moment of extreme anger. above^ why would you not want to hear that from an ex? I don't think it is emotional at all, i actually think it lacks emotion, and maybe if you were the one too hurt her you might want to warm it up a little. Who ended it? details please so i can help you best. Please also see my post in the latest threads if you wish.
  19. twelve
    what does he want and why does he want to see you again? read my post above. sounds like he ended it because you were fighting a lot, maybe you needed space - some time apart - learn to resolve the problems that every couple has..
  20. twelve
    well I can't say im surprised...being a lesbian, after years of sex with men, it did not much for me , and well, sex with a woman is just so much better on so many levels. Female sexuality....MMMMMM don't be afraid, explore your sexuality, maybe you are bi, or gay, who knows, but it's all good. with men or women...as long as you enjoy it
  21. twelve
    ok this girl is giving big mixed signals. i dont like games but id say become distant for a while and shell miss you and come after you if she feels that way, then youll have your answer. if you are always there, she may be taking you for granted. Try it, get busy, hang with others, and see what happens in time. Let us know
  22. twelve
    no contact is a good idea as it seems he is confused and this will give him time to miss you and sort out what he wants, which is much better in the long run for you.
  23. twelve
    hiya i would say ok id love to talk but right now i need some time (even if you are dying to see him) and initiate NC for a while until you are feeling stronger. He sounds confused too - doesn't seem like he knows what he wants. Maybe he is playing games with you, Im not sure but be wary of it, he may have said he doesn't want to be friends to mess with you. why would he suddenly want to see you if he really didn't? Maybe he also is worried he cant be friends because it hurts. Why did you break up?
  24. twelve
    hi all. I see a lot of posts on here telling people that time heals and you will move on if you do NC and try to. Well its been over a year since a breakup with the best relationship ive ever had - we both thought of each other as soulmates. anyway, we came back together about 7 months ago but fell out again, and now i see how i contributed to it It was not only my fault though, but ANYWAY! The thing is, I have seen 5 people since, a few whom i got close to, but it has never been the same and i have left each person, and now dont go there because i dont want to use anyone or be with someone for the sake of it. NC helped me at the start, about a year ago, but my heart is still broken and i am missing this person dreadfully, and in my soul i feel we shouldnt be apart. Can anyone relate? Or offer advice? It's been a long time and Ive tried so hard to move on and have maintained NC strictly.
  25. twelve
    Do let us know and good luck PM me if you need someone to talk to about it ok. I think you are right in your approach and more people need to do that.From what you have said it does seem to be working, high fives to your strength. I have mainatined NC for over 7 months now *not easy* but shes on my mind a LOT. I miss her with all my heart. Your post has helped me. I should maintain the power I have worked so hard to achieve after years of always being the one she had power over. I still don't think I should be so stubborn as to not apologise, but I will be mysterious, like you, and not give away info about my current life.I will make it seem that I am apologising as i need to say some things and show how I have grown and realised my errors but I will not ask for another chance as that will make me powerless. No grovelling, but moe like "I feel really terirble for what I did". Your approach makes sense. I hate games oo but sometimes it's necessary out of self protection when you have been hurt. But surely an apology doesnt make you completely powerless again? Do you think its all in how I do it? I'd appreciate your thoughts. I did some stink things. What do you think?
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