Getting Better

I think marrigage should happen when both persons are ready for it.

Thank you for your reply. Im going to try and not worry. Beth

Hi this is a follow up to my previous post, Ive being seeing kelvin for four weeks on sunday. I haven't seem him for two weeks tomorrw. We were suppose to be seeing each other tonight and going out for a meal, but the snow is bad where he is so, he couldn't come over. Well i dont' know if this is normall to have only seen somone three times in like four weeks, it would have been four times tonight. We speak everyday online, through texts and sometimes calls, he called me tonight. He says he thinks we should take it nice and steady, im not used to things been this slow, so am not sure how to go on with it. Do i play it cool and let him do all the running, do i give up. Can anyone help. I really like him. Beth

hi sorry i wasn't trying to say that all americans go to these bike ralleys, im sure there is people from many differnt countries that do, i was curious as to wether in different countries the attuides about things change. I know in england that mps are not innocent and there has been lots of stories about them.

I dont know, im used to someone falling in love with me straight away and me falling in love with them and it being intense. I know that he went out with someone for 8 months and it was intense.

i was with my ex for over two years, and we broke up i was devesated, it was him what left me, no one else was involved. i was sucidal and tried to commit sucide, i spent days crying not knowing if we would get back together eventally we stopped speaking, i started to sort myself out and i changed a lot for the better, i started dating, and moved on, then i had to get in touch with my ex has he had quiet a lot of stuff at my house still and i need him to move it, it had been 7 months since we had split and didn't see each other for 5 months, when we spoke we relaised that we still loved each other and we met up, we got back together and where suppose to take things slowly things had improved to a point, but then i started to have doubt about wether i wanted to be with him or not. So caused arguments told him i wanted to end it,then diddn't know what i wanted. we stayed together for two months then it finally reached an end on new years day three years and a day since we had got together. We had a horrible argument and he finished it, for a week i feel really devesated then the pain started to ease. Ive realised that we should never have got back together after not talking for so long, maybe if we had kept in some kind of contact it could have worked, but my feelings wern't the same anymore. I think that sometimes it can work but very rarely and not after a long period apart.

i think that you need to resolve these jealously problems and stop the arguing, it is doing neither of you any good and will just push you apart and when the baby is is born you need your engery for that and also its not fair on a child to be having arguments. I think that to mock you is not nice and he should be more repectfull towards you.

I don't think that there is nothing wrong with porn but to constanaly watch it tells me the guy has problems.

we do go out, we went out to the town where i live on friday and met with one of my friends. He has said that he doesn't want it to be all about sex, he wants us to get to know each other , go out for meals and do things together. He has said off his own back that he is not looking for anyone else.

I have read through all these post on this topic and felt that i need to do a reply. I think hope that you have jealousy problems which you need to deal with and you that you are not secure in yourself as a person. I used to have really big jealousy problems didn't like my ex looking at other girls, porn, couldnt stand the thought of him seeing a stipper not that he used to look at porn or watch stippers, but i used to worry about all these, even page threes, we split up for reasons. I went in to thearpy as i have depression and wanted to get better and get rid of my jealousy as its not good. Now i don't get jealous, the man who iam currently seeing has a porn collection im not bothered, we went out there was podium dancers doing the splits lol, it didn't bother me, at the end of the day the guy is with me and goes home with me. If he wanted to see a stipper i wouldn't be bothere, its only looking, But as far as this bike rally is concerend i have to agree with you, i dont think its right for a man to go on his own with out his gf when there are all these naked women there, i went and watched a video and it looks like a porn shoot not a biking rally. There is no need for these women to take all there clothes off and perform sexual acts, its not a porn shoot, Topless women yeah nothing wrong with that, but these are so over the top and i know in england where i come from my friends would not put up with their bf or husbands going to these kind of events, as far as im aware they are no where as bad as they are in america, is this an america thing where girls have no respect for them selfs at these places. Is everyone that has replied to this topic from america or is there anyone from england.

I know that he had been single for a few months.

I am dating a guy who i really like, we met on link removed about four weeks ago. We spoke everyday for about two weeks then we met, i went to his, we where going to go for a meal the day before but i couldn't go, he made me a meal at his, i was going to sleep in the spare bedroom, but i ended up in his bed, it wasnt his idea and not something i normally do, we just go on so well and there was a connection between us. We just cuddled at first and went to sleep, me in his arms and it felt really nice. We did make love early hours of the morning and it was amazing. I stayed at his house well he went to work as it was my day off college, hes never let anyone stay in his house on their own and hes been living there for 18 months. He had to go to daubi the next day for work for five days, we spoke on msn everyday, he told me he was missing me, he even phoned me once. He asked if he could see me when he got back on sunday, i said yes i was missing him too.I asked him if he would ever become my bf and he said we were bordering on that now. He came an saw me on that sunday it was really good, he stayed over so i slept in his arms, i kep waking up and and woke him up as i moved he didn't mind he just cuddled me then one of the times i was having a bad dream, and he said are you having a nightmare, i said a dream he said i will protect you and he holded me close. we have continued to speak everyday since then through texts and msn, sometimes me first, sometimes him first. On wednesday he said when are we going to see each other again, and we arranged to meet on friday, he wanted to meet my friends too, we went out on friday and met one of my friends and had a really good night. We are still speaking everyday, today i asked him if i would become his girlfriend and he said well you sort of are doing in a way aren't you, early days at mo, so we are dating. When he was in daubi he had my name in henna on his arm in arabic, he bought me a teddy camel back. He tells me that he is looking forward to seeing me when we have a date, we have met three times so far. We have both said we will take it slowly. When he first met me after wards he said that he thought meeting me would be a laugh he didn't expect to get feelings for me. I like him a lot and am falling for him. I don't want to get hurt and im not used to taking things slowly. But i need to take things slowly and am trying to do so, how do i carry on from here, how do i contiue to take things slowly, i still have my own life and see my friends and so does he. What do you think of this.

Hi im 27 and im going out with a man who is 47 we have been together for nearly three years. It can work neither of us sees the age gap a problem we don't think about it. Beth xx

Me and my boyfriend split up in march this year, we stayed friends till may, then we fell out as i was very ill mentaly. We split up as we were aruging all the time, when we got on it was really good and when it was bad, it was really bad, i used to start a lot of the arguments, due to my jealousy, being insercure, parnoia, basiclly i have a mental illness and this cause huge problems, we were together for over two years and was living together, he tried to help me get better and i tried hard to get better, got private thearpy as was waiting for it on nhs. I was depend on him, didn't work didn't have many friends, didn't really have a life of my own. In the end it was making him ill and he couldn't help me anymore. He still love me and i loved him, but he though it was best to leave. Then in october, we got talking as i had some of this stuff still and we realsied that we still love each other. So we have started to see each other again. We are talking things slowly, not telling each other we love each other. Its not heavy, we are seeing how things go. When we first got back together four weeks ago, he seemed to enjoy have sex with me, but when we had sex on wednesday, i felt like he doesn't find me sexually actravtive, he didn't do anythign really for me to think this and last night he didnt' want sex, he is 20 years older than me and has errection problems, ie finds he hard to get an errection, he has had this problem for many years so its not just me. So i know that he worrys about this and finds it furstraing. I asked him if he finds me sexually acctriave and he said that yes he does. Sometimes he doesn't hold my hand or kiss me as much then i started to think he doesn't want me and he has gone off me. Then he does something that makes me realise that he does love me and that maybe im been parnoid. I do suffer from parnoia and worry too much. I have had thearpy on nhs now and am still having it, next appointment in jan. And with the help of the thearpist and and my self, i feel a lot more secure in my self, don't get jealous anymore, like myself, don't worry as much as i used to, can deal with my panoia more but still have problems with it. I have gone back to college to become a nurse. I have friends and my family and my baby niece who i adore and love. I have a social life, am happy most of the time. I have my own life now so won't become depend on my boyfriend, i know that he hopes for us to live together again and so do i. I have manged to do this on my own well with my thearpist over the last seven months, so the break from my bf has been postive, i thought we would never get back together, im glad that we have. i know that my bf has a low sex drive and i have a high one so i dont know what to do about this. Am i been parnoid, can anyone help please.