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Lil Punkin

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  1. Lil Punkin
    Hey Max....I am sorry to hear you're going through this. Your ex is telling you the reason he had to end this because you were "too unstable"?? Oh but the fact he's talking to his ex has NOTHING to do with it huh?? Sweetie I am sorry but that's just wrong. He's trying to justify HIS behavior by blaming you. Please don't let him manipulate you into thinking this breakup is YOUR fault.....it takes TWO people to make OR break a relationship. Has he taken ANY accountability for anything that went wrong in the relationship? I know it's tough, but hang in there.....this forum is a good place to vent, so keep posting if you need to.
  2. Lil Punkin
    Hey Cool Bloke Sorry you're going through this right now...your ex sounded confused and maybe still wanting to 'sow some oats" when you were available to him. Truthfully, I think in those circumstances I would have reacted the same way you did. Maybe he is having "issues' with his dad not accepting your relationship with you...Hard to say....if thats the case..HE needs to be the one to bring it up. Has youre ex made ANY attempts to contact you?? If not..I might send him a SHORT text wishing him a happy Holiday or something....if you wish to open that "door' again. See if he replies..... I hope things work out for you.....keep us posted
  3. Lil Punkin
    Today is the day I start living Today I will stop crying No more tears, no more begging No more pleading, no more promises that fall on deaf ears. I make a pledge to myself that I will not spend one more minute of my life that I will never get back on someone who is not willing to give me the love I am worthy of and deserve. Tomorrow I will not stay in bed until noon, because I'm too sad to get up. I will not watch the phone every 5 minutes hoping it will ring. I will not turn on my computer HOPING you sent that long awaited email. No, tomorrow is a new beginning. I will smile. I will remember the people who are good to me. I will wake up with hope in my heart, because I have finally said goodbye to you. Next week I will have new plans I will make that date with that hot person at the gym. I will get outside and start enjoying the fresh air and sunshine again. I will smile and bashfully accept the compliment from the stranger who said they loved my smile. I will start feeling good again ...for mowing how very much I have to offer.. Next month I will have so much energy, I will feel like I can dance forever! I will be amazed at how many people find me irresistible again... I will be shocked at how busy I am becoming. I will be in awe that your memory hasn't crossed my mind at all in at least a week. I am getting there.... Slowly but surely ..I am saying goodbye.
  4. Lil Punkin
    Hmmmmm.....I guess I can understand that. Did she ever give you a reason why she felt that way??
  5. Lil Punkin
    Stand Tall? Just curious...if you broke things off....and she is acting "cold" why does that bother you? Would it make a difference if she broke down and begged you back? I am asking because I wonder if people in your position 9the dumper) DO in fact feel distraught after breaking things off.... Are you having second thoughts?
  6. Lil Punkin
    Freckle.... Keefy is right, harsh as the reality is..this guy is a LOSER....do you want to be associated with a LOSER?? I mean think about it. Would your parents be proud of you for your choice? Although I know it's YOUR decision who you date..but could you be proud to say..'Yeah he doesn't work, I pay the bills, he really has nothing to offer me, but I LOVE him anyway". Does that sound like your dream guy?? Think about it.....You know this guy is BAD NEWS.You gotta take off those rose colored galsses...or beer goggles, whatever you call them...and see this as it is. You can do better!!
  7. Lil Punkin
    well said Poco...I agree 100%!!!!!
  8. Lil Punkin
    So she's got a little ego boost on the side while she hangs on to this "relationship".....Keefy, don't accept sloppy seconds. You sound like a wonderful, caring guy. I am glad you're doing NC with her....chances are she's gotten used to having her cake and eating it too....but the question here is...what's Keefy getting out of this?? If you're feeling strong Keefy, don't go back.... Keep posting!
  9. Lil Punkin
    Keefy..you are NOT a moron!!! You are in love...BIG difference. When you're being fed a load of crap..especially by someone who is ambivalent..it's EASY to get sucked in. I mean there are TONS of websites and support groups for people who are involved with married people...that goes on for years and years. Do you want to be one of THEM??? This is really no different..she's been with this guy 7 or 8 years..and shows NO signs of leaving him. What ARE you getting out of this...you need to ask yourself that very difficult question.....I would really like to see you get away from this woman AND this situation....so keep please keep posting on this thread.
  10. Lil Punkin
    LMAO Keefy.... and remember...you can't go wrong....
  11. Lil Punkin
    I understand Keefy.... When we love someone it's easy to make excuses for their behavior. It's probably easier to blame HIM...the apparent "source" of the problem..than to blame HER. I mean how could someone you love be the reason you're miserable? Thats what love does..it clouds your sense of judgement. That is ALSO why doing NC is effective. It clears that fog, so you can more clearly and objectively...hang in there. I'm sure your perception will change in no time.
  12. Lil Punkin
    hey Keefy!!! Well from what I've read, although this "old man' is not giving her what she wants, it doesn't seem like anyone is holding a gun to her head making her stay either. I mean, "dating" someone for 6-7 years...and waiting to get "fed up" sounds like a pretty lame excuse to hold onto someone. The question here is..whats SHE afraid of. He's made it obvious the relationship is going nowhere..what else does she need to figure out? Maybe SHE is actually the commitment phobic.....just a guess. Can you talk to her and ask her what the hold up is? She's NOT getting any younger, in case she hasn't noticed.
  13. Lil Punkin
    Hannibal, what you're feeling is loss. Like if someone you love died. I agree with Melrich, the realization of not wanting something back that you once wanted more than anything IS just as bad. I had that feeling once with a guy I liked a lot as a "friend" but he wanted more....it just really made me sad in my heart that I could not give him that. More sad for him than for me...but i undersand the feeling well.. Hope you feel better..
  14. Lil Punkin
    Freckle... You ARE going through "withdrawals"...its very commom.You were in an "addictive" type relationship..and now you're going "cold turkey". It is expected to happen. Treat this ex as a bad "habit" you'e trying to break...would you start using drugs again if you knew you'd end up strung out and sorry for it afterward? Of course not!! The same with an ex who is bad for you. Too bad there ISN'T drug we can take to get over this though huh?lol. Hang in there girl.........you'll make it!!!
  15. Lil Punkin
    Stick to NC. DarkBlue is right...this is merely a blow to your ego right now. So this guy thought she "looked hot"...thats simply a compliment to your taste. Just because she APPEARED to be having a great time , doesn't mean she was. She is simply living her life..as YOU should be. For what it's worth..congrats on the 2 months of NC...I'm doing it now, and I KNOW how tough it is. You're doing better than you think you are..these setbacks are very normal. Stay strong.
  16. Lil Punkin
    Hey Lizzy... Hang in there. This will pass....Trust me it will. Don't give in.If you contact him and get nothing you will feel even worse tomorrow..then you have to start OVER. Ugh!! Get out a calendar...and for ONE month, cross out the days of NC....Try to stay busy if you can. I know it's tough .. This site is also a great outlet..albeit VERY addictive..but helpful nonetheless!! I'm in NC right now with someone, and if you feel weak, post here or PM me... I am more than happy to 'shame' you out of contacting your jerky ex. lol Hows that for a start?
  17. Lil Punkin
    Trish..wow that was long but worth the read. Thanks for that post. I am considering contacting someone again at some point....but after your post I am not so sure. He's given me similar "generic" replies..and like you, I have found myself attacking him for it. Although, lately I've just not done ANYTHING because I know how I am. I don't know HOW I will feel in 2 months..or 3 months...maybe I WILL decide I no longer WANT to contact him. I know how upset you must feel with not getting the proper closure you needed...but truthfully, and you might not agree...anything he said, short of "I want to get back together" Or something like that, would never be good enough. Simply because you wanted more than he could give you. You are right ..he probably did lose all tolerance...thats what happened with me as well. At that point all you can do is just cease and desist ALL contact. Anything else is just harassment in their eyes. I am trying to be strong...I am in NC right now, just hoping I can make it through. Good luck on your article
  18. Lil Punkin
    Ya gotta give it to Sxxy Lady though..she knows how to get a thread started!!!!! lol
  19. Lil Punkin
    Yep Patience..thats exactly what I read the first time I saw her post...hence the reason I didn't understand the big deal...
  20. Lil Punkin
    I thought NC WAS moving on??? Am I missing something here??
  21. Lil Punkin
    I could be wrong but the way INTERPRETED her post was that they were NOT interested. I am in no way defending her..just saying I think her post was grossly exxaggerated about her intentions,because to ME it just sounds like she's doing NC as a way to YES allow these guys to pursue her more often. I have to say from experience, always being the one to pursue gets old, FAST!
  22. Lil Punkin
    LOL dako.....I agree!!!
  23. Lil Punkin
    WOW...this is crazy. What I see here is one poster being BERATED for doing they feel is right for themselves. Why is that wrong? I don't see how she is hurting anyone here. She already said neither seems interested in pursuing anything with her and she wants to back out and see what happens. Thats what i'm reading anyway. I would probably do the same thing in her situation, does that make me a game player too? I guess I just don't see the big deal.
  24. Lil Punkin
    OCD...This is awesome news!!! I am SO happy for you!!! I would play it cool for now...let her initiate most of the calls still....but maybe you can call her once a week....or until things are more "firm". You must remember...after this NC, you guys are practically starting over again, so you need to treat this as a NEW relationship. You can't go back from where you left off. I think you handled things perfectly.... I hope things work out for you this time!!!
  25. Lil Punkin
    Being "IN LOVE".... Usually lasts the first year..or less... The butterflies, the anticipation, the rendevous to little hotels...the getting to know each other phase. Lets face it..most people starting to date, attempt to put on their best "face" till at least the third or fourth month..this is when we start seeing little parts of their personality we may not like so much. You may find that they are lazy, unmotivated, slobs, bad manners, maybe they are extremely jealous or possessive. WOW..why didn't we see this before?? Because you were to blinded by being "IN LOVE"....to notice before!! Now LOVE....is wanting to be there when your NOT so sexy partner is having surgery and you want to be there when they wake up. It's knowing your partner is NOT perfect but you love them AND their imperfections anyway. It's doing something you may NOT want to do..but you do it anyway because you know it's something your partner loves and will make them happy. LOVE is not selfish. LOVE is non judgemental REAL LOVE endures....through the good times..AND the bad times.
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