Jump to content

fate or freewill

Members
 View Profile  See their activity

  • Posts

    50

  • Joined

fate or freewill's Achievements

Contributor

Contributor (5/14)

  • First Post
  • Collaborator
  • Conversation Starter

Recent Badges

1

Reputation

  1. fate or freewill
    Try masterbating before you go to the strip club. That way your not walking around with a loaded gun so to speak.
  2. fate or freewill
    My brother was on Paxil for 6 years and stopped taking it because he didn't like the side effects. It took over six months before he was (almonst) back to normal, he had to quit his job and go on disability, couldn't concentrate and was in general a basket-case for the first 3-4 months.
  3. fate or freewill
    Sorry to hear about your situation, life is unfair sometimes. I know your hurting now, I think the best thing you can do is to make taking care of yourself priority 1. Try getting enough sleep and eating or at least try making protien shakes, they go down a lot easier when you don't feel like solid food. Don't try to call her so much 20 times a day isn't going to help your situation in any regard. Give her and yourself time to absorb what's going on. If you are still talking to her, this may be the best time to get some closure on the relationship, as suggested ask her what's the deal and just accept the answers. Take care, this is going to take some time to reslove, but regardless, it will pass.
  4. fate or freewill
    Sounds to me like she just wants some time and space to do her thing, you guys were together for over three years and you are still young and in college, so this is the time to do it. So now you know what's going on in her head. Move on and do your own thing as well. As far as what traits help a relationship last, it must be multifaceted answer and not just a single trait: * Equal desire for the relationship * Shared values * Sexual, emotional and intellectual connections
  5. fate or freewill
    Usually, I think people will say they would like to be friends just to ease their guilt and to try to lessen the blow for the dumpee. I don't think being friends with someone you were going out with is very healthy or productive. My best recommendation is to write that relationship off and just move on. Their are plenty of other people to be friends with, without all that emotional baggage that has been accumulated.
  6. fate or freewill
    Finding closure can be a tricky task especially if the other party isn't speaking to you anymore! I found it very helpful to write down the questions I had for my ex and after much though I came up with the most likely answer (remember Occam's razor - the simplest answer is the best), this method has helped at least for me answer my questions of why? P.S. After 11 weeks of NC on a 14 week relationship, you should be getting lots of numbers and dating other people by now.
  7. fate or freewill
    Sounds like you've got 2 problems. First off she's already got a boyfriend. So exactly where do you see yourself in this mix? Secondly, she's only a child, you can't tell me you really think you can have a relationship with a child and expect this to work out. Isn't it illegal and immoral? Can't you find a girl closer to your age or at least find one that's of legal age?
  8. fate or freewill
    I agree, it's a bad time for a lot of us on the forum. On my better days, I like to look at it as a time for healing, reflection and rejuvenation. After 6 weeks of NC, I'm slowly getting back into a better groove of something that resembles a new life. Some work, some exercise some studying a lot of socializing and meeting new people. In the end all you can do is pick a direction, put one foot in front of the other and start walking.
  9. fate or freewill
    My ex was almost the same way, but for long periods of time. She would be normal for weeks or so, but when she got really stressed out she would yell and throw things and be very hurtfull twoard those around her. It was like a defense mechanism for her, a shield she would put up where she would be so angry so she could block everyone out. She did take some anger management classes, that would be my suggestion to you, they seemed to help a bit, but I think it's something you also have to keep up with, not something you went to once, but something you have to continually practice to change your behavior.
  10. fate or freewill
    I don't think its a big deal, hang out with him, if your dad finds out just tell him he's a friend. Eventually your father's going to have to accept you for who you are...his son. One of my brother's was in the same situation, it took a long time to tell our family what was going on, but in the end we all still love him the same.
  11. fate or freewill
    If your masterbating 1-2 times a day, it's no wonder your having issues. Try keeping your off yourself for a week, then call your girlfriend over and see what happens. Their's only so much work a penis is going to do, save up your "energy" and then see what happens.
  12. fate or freewill
    Dinner and a walk sounds like the plan to me, but no alcohol, it will only skew your judgement and may lead to one or the both of you getting emotional. Keep the conversation light, don't talk about the relationship and just have some fun.
  13. fate or freewill
    Sounds like you need to let this one go. My ex and I have been in the same situation for 20 years and NO it dosen't get any easier or better. She's left 3 times because of stupid dissagreements the last time for almost 10 years and this time I hope for good. I think we all gotta realize that if someone want's to be with you, they will be there and if you have problems then they will work on a compromise or resolution. If their first response is to leave, then move on and find someone who will stay.
  14. fate or freewill
    I'm glad to hear of a good success story on your part, but I am concerned with your ex's behavior of leaving and coming back. My ex from high school and I have the same pattern spread over 20 years now. We get together for a few months or years then she just leaves for years at a time. You can see that this is not a healthy relationship pattern and I'm afraid yours might develop the same way. Since your in control of the situation now, I would suggest you date for the next few years and see how things go, if you find he disappears again, you may want to reconsider who the love of your life is and find another one.
  15. fate or freewill
    With such a long relationship, you probably still have some kind of emotional reside that's being stirred up with this contact from your ex. Two years is not a long time after being together for better part of a decade. It had been 10 years since I had seen my ex (we got together and recently split again) but I could feel all the emotional patterns and behaviors coming out from 10 years ago, like it was yesterday. As far as him being a jerk, he probably has unresolved issues as well and this is his way of dealing with them. You could let him know he's being disrespectful and lying to you and since your just trying to be friends, you won't put up with this behavior.
×
×
  • Create New...