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Thread: She said they only kissed but my gut says otherwise

  1. #21
    Platinum Member catfeeder's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    New Jersey
    Instead of operating on emotion alone, I'd meet with an attorney to learn all of my options along with the smartest steps to take for each option.

    It makes no senes to lurk around trying to catch wife in lies when you already know what's been going on. So what's the value in that? You don't need to make any decisions right now, but you can at least consult with a legal expert to learn what options are available to you and what protections you can put into place that will support any choices you will make when you're ready.

  2. #22
    Bronze Member
    Join Date
    Apr 2018
    Like everyone says, it is a situation that no one wants to be in.

    Furthermore, you are at a place where you feel like it's a hard decision and not knowing the things to come in the future is more pain. At this point your wife did not care about you or your family. Even if you believe that it was just a kiss and say you even give her a pass about the kiss but the truth of the matter is, during that simple kiss, she threw out all regards of you and your family. None of that mattered to her at that moment in time. Say you give her a pass on the kiss, later on the thought will always be there, you will suspect what she would be doing when she is alone. You will assume the worst when you think she is lying about things all the time, even if she is not lying at all. She will be in a position where she is going to be accused of something perhaps she did or didn't do in the future. This is all because trust has been broken between two people who's bonds are supposed to be stronger than any other two people. This will lead to a toxic environment which she will probably seek out your cousin again, if they ever stop in the first place.

    This is only one path of turmoil that you could face in the future. There are better outcomes with much commitment and work with a lot of time. To rebuild the trust and then continuing to live your lives.

    Remember when she did this she was selfish and only cared of herself without any regard to you or your children. Many possibly outcomes of turmoil and pain in the future while only one happy ending for all your family with a lot of work and self control on your end.

    At this state you will need to ask yourself, are you willing to take on that responsibilities and effort for a person have you on such low regards just for the sake of your children and what you may call love?

    If so, think about this, you can always go for custody of your kids, you can always be a good father for them long as you are around and doing what fathers do. Children will not blame you or hate you for what has become of the family because at the end of the day, the real truth will come out and they will still love you.

    So with all said and done, are you willing to do all that effort for this one person who does not care for you at all. Lets but the delusions aside because her actions says she doesn't care, she just wants to bang your cousin because of whatever she claims she is not getting from you. Even if she says she cares about you.

    Leave her high and dry, take the kids, raise them and be a good father. If there were no issues in the past, look at it as good memories with three good prizes that came of it.

    Good Luck dude.

  3. #23

    Join Date
    May 2019
    Yes she knows I know about the messages.

  4. #24
    Bronze Member Afireblue's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2019
    Vancouver, BC
    Originally Posted by Timmaa
    I have confronted her and him about having sex. They both deny it. This is the txt between them. Pretty sure they were talking on the phone before these txt.

    She said - Ifeel a little PTSD because of this whole pregnancy scare...I've had a miscarriage before and it was rough.... then she said call me crazy but I'm a little sad

    He responded - I'm sad too. Don't think I'm not. I only felt we should have gone that route because of our situation. I meant every word I said to you. I would love to marry you and make another child with you. I hope you realize that I meant all those things.
    Who has a pregnancy scare without having sex??? of course they will deny it! my ex cheated on me and swore on his life that he wasn't cheating... I had proof, also messages he had with her... it took a while for him to admit he was cheating


  6. #25
    Gold Member Gary Snyder's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2016
    Land of Wind & Ghosts
    Oh wow. A cheating and lying wife. And not only that, but with blood, your cousin! Two relationships could be down the drain. I don't know where to begin.

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