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Afireblue

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About Afireblue

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    Bronze Member
  • Birthday 11/10/1980

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  1. yes, I guess Im confused too, because I wasnt expecting this to be anything but I feel getting attached. The bottom line is that he is not what I want in the long run, I would like to meet someone older who already has his life together, even with grown kids so we have similar lifes, etc, I think my mind is clouded by the romance, I have a lot of thinking to do
  2. Yes, definitely I am wary, at this stage in my life I would like to find someone who is older than me, that has his own kids, so he understands what parenting is like, someone more financially stable ,etc, I think about all this things as I've made so many mistakes before, Thank you again for taking the time to respond!
  3. There's some points I'd like to offer more insight too if this helps, This is so unexpected to me for the following: - I just came back home from living abroad into my city of origin in October 2020 - He just moved into my city from another country in Dec 2020, starting his own design company in the middle of a global pandemic I was not looking for a bf, I did join a meet up group for outdoor activities in my city and met him, we became fast friends even on the phone we would just chat and not flirt, after about 1 month he started flirting with me and I fell for that immedi
  4. After reading everyone's input I have to accept that after therapy, being single for 5 years focusing on me and my family I am still carrying my traumas in the bag, I really thought I have left them behind, I didnt use to be like this, I had a horrible marriage that destroyed my self esteem, verbal, mental and physical abuse, then 4 years later a 1 year relationship with a man who wasnt over his ex and I didnt see it until the end, dates with men who treated me like a piece of meat. Yes, I may have allowed all of this, but I came to my senses, took 5 long years to heal, only to find out that I
  5. OMG You are right! this is spot on He has arranged multiple dates where we dont have sex, like when he knows Im in his town (we live 1 hour away) he meets up with me just to see me, and I find that very cute He is a very private person and does not offer any information regarding his past relationship nor he asks about mine, but I am more open and I have told him the general info, that im divorced and my ex is not in the picture, etc. He always makes an effort to communicate, for sure, and when his friends were here and I felt ignored I just gave him space but we got together r
  6. That's the thing, we went from being friends/ activity partners, to kissing and then seeing each other regularly, we never talked of where things were going, we just decided to enjoy the attraction, for me it was all unexpected because he never gave me a hint that he liked me, and I thought he was attractive but that was it. I know that he wants to have kids in the future and he is working on being more financially stable to raise a family, I dont want more kids, and we may not stay together forever, but I"m okay with that, even though we have never discuss that, I want to be able to enjo
  7. You are right, but I have to do this when I am not in an anxious frame of mind, thank you!! ❤️
  8. Well, I have met only 1 of his friends, I went hiking and invited him and he came with his bff and his son, and we spend the whole day together, it was so nice, he texted me that night that he enjoyed my company huge!! However, he had friends visiting from abroad last week and he did not include me in anything and we barely talked that week, but he send me photos of what him and his friends were doing. of course my anxiety went to the roof but I gave him his space and when his friends left he called me and said he missed me. He also plays front tennis at the same arena where my daughter
  9. You are completely right, my anxiety is pretty bad because I've had horrible experiences with relationships, abuse, cheating, etc... I have had therapy before and have gotten a lot better but this feeling I have proves I still need improvement to do
  10. For your own mental health you need to set boundaries with her, you have feelings for her but for what you described she doesnt reciprocate, in fact, she is going through her own struggles. Its nice that you want to be there as a friend, but dont expect anything more
  11. Hi amigos, I've been dating this guy for 2 months, we met online as friends, discovered a tons of things we have in common and have similar personalities, ideas and get along fabulous! he's very affectionate and treats me like a lady, chemistry is off the charts and sex is great. We laugh a lot and talk about deep things too. I know is very early on, still honeymoon phase stuff, but I'm wondering when to bring that topic up. I am a very insecure woman in general but I dont act it outwards. I have been burned badly and I'm working on improving that about me, it has been a c
  12. So, just a little update... It couldn't have gone better!!! I didn't gather the guts to ask him face to face, so I carried a note with me for a whole week lol. Then decided to give up, like wiseman said, if he was interested in me he would make it crystal clear... In the meantime we continued to flirt with each other...Well, today I brought the note back with me, I had a good feeling about today... he asked me for my phone number when we said goodbye so I just handed him the note and said "great minds think alike" and I went home with a smile on my face. ..
  13. He hugged me yesterday! :/
  14. I really like this approach, it's more subtle ;)
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