Are these human scratches?

[Angmat]

My boyfriend was at home yesterday afternoon. He said he was in the garage cleaning up. He showed up today with this scratch on him. He says it was caused by puttering around the confined space in his garage. He can't recall exactly what scratched him either. It looks fishy to me. I thought human scratch at first but now I'm thinking an animal like a cat or tree branches. He's had scratches like this before. And I just can't take it anymore. I'm starting to go off the deep end thinking he's been cheating. I am trying to trust him but he keeps getting these scratches!

 

Trying to post a pic of the scratches. How do I do this?

[Seraphim]

My boyfriend was at home yesterday afternoon. He said he was in the garage cleaning up. He showed up today with this scratch on him. He says it was caused by puttering around the confined space in his garage. He can't recall exactly what scratched him either. It looks fishy to me. I thought human scratch at first but now I'm thinking an animal like a cat or tree branches. He's had scratches like this before. And I just can't take it anymore. I'm starting to go off the deep end thinking he's been cheating. I am trying to trust him but he keeps getting these scratches!

 

Trying to post a pic of the scratches. How do I do this?

Has he cheated before? Given you reason to be suspicious?

[Wiseman2]

Unfortunately this seems to be a recurrent theme. Delusions of cheating replete with 'forensic evidence' indicates a much larger problem. The best thing to do is get a complete physical including brain imaging and a neurological consult. If things check out physically and neurologically ask for a referral to a psychiatrist and a therapist. Any of these issues can cause pathological jealousy and symptoms of delusions like this.

06-09-2018:

 

There's more! After we had sex, I noticed a deep cut above his ankle bone. I asked him how it happened. He told me it was itchy in that spot and he scratched himself. Also, he had a small bruise on his bicep and a small red circular mark under his knee.

[Andrina]

Actually, those type of scratches sound like it could possibly be self harm. I've known two people who did this to themselves--a way to focus on physical pain instead of psychological pain. If this is a regular occurrence, I'd ask if he's self harming, and if so, suggest he see a therapist.

 

If he's not receiving secretive phone calls and hiding his phone and shows no other red flags of cheating, I think self harm is the most likely cause.

[Angmat]

No, it's definitely not self harm. He is too egotistical and narcissistic to ever harm himself. How do I post a pic of the scratch? You can all answer based on the evidence itself.

 

I've had a gut feeling and I do notice changes in him that are suspect.

[Seraphim]

Why not break up then?

Post pic using photo bucket or another platform. But since we are not forensic scientists .....

[yatsue]

No, it's definitely not self harm. He is too egotistical and narcissistic to ever harm himself. How do I post a pic of the scratch? You can all answer based on the evidence itself.

 

I've had a gut feeling and I do notice changes in him that are suspect.

 

No need to post a picture. There is no way to tell if they're human, animal, or from some random inanimate object. I remember replying to your last thread. It seems you still cannot get over him cheating in his past, despite it not being on you.

 

If you cannot trust him, you either need to leave or seek help for your delusional insecurities. Yes, these are delusional thoughts. I get scratches all of the darn time. I have never cheated. If my partner accused me of what you were thinking, I would blow up. Seriously, I would be incredably mad from hearing this baseless nonsense. I rarely get mad.

 

You need to recognize these are paranoid delusions. What do you want to do about them, in light of this knowledge? Continuing to have them isn't going to help your situation. You either get rid of the source (him - no, I don't think he's cheating, but his past could be enough for you not to pursue a relationship anymore) or deal with your insecurity, either by going to therapy or talking to him about his past in how it relates to the present as your own problem (you need to fix this yourself, this is your issue not his, but coming clean about how you are having these inappropriate feelings and trying to deal with them is progress, while not accusing him).

[LightWave93]

IMGUR is your best bet. Create an account and upload through that, so you can delete it afterwards (if you upload an image without first signing in, you can't delete it easily).

 

As for the scratches; there are many, many, MANY reasons why this could be happening. Granted, cheating could be one of them, but it could be anything. Also, not sure about you, but I don't get cuts and bruises knees, biceps and ankle bones every time I have sex. The reason for his change in behavior is probably down to how you are treating him with negative assumptions and judgement of character.

 

EDIT:

 

Okay, so I'm reading your previous thread.

 

The whole Snapchat argument is completely invalid. Snapchat and indeed location services on mobile phones are NOT 100% accurate. His mobile location is clearly out of sync with reality and just assumes it's at the nearby public activity, hence the swinging club avatar.

 

I agree about therapy. You're way too anxious and paranoid, no wonder he's distant with you. Please seek help. :)

[j.man]

I routinely have scratches on me. It's called working with your hands. Find a guy with a desk job and who doesn't believe in maintaining his own home.

[Starlight925]

Heck, I'm a middle-aged female and I have scratches and bruises all the time. Just pulling large items in and out of my car, or bumping myself against the open dishwasher, stuff like that.

 

If you trust him, you trust him. If not, just end it. But to ruminate over this repeatedly isn't helping yourself.

[Seraphim]

IMGUR is your best bet. Create an account and upload through that, so you can delete it afterwards (if you upload an image without first signing in, you can't delete it easily).

 

As for the scratches; there are many, many, MANY reasons why this could be happening. Granted, cheating could be one of them, but it could be anything. Also, not sure about you, but I don't get cuts and bruises knees, biceps and ankle bones every time I have sex. The reason for his change in behavior is probably down to how you are treating him with negative assumptions and judgement of character.

 

EDIT:

 

Okay, so I'm reading your previous thread.

 

The whole Snapchat argument is completely invalid. Snapchat and indeed location services on mobile phones are NOT 100% accurate. His mobile location is clearly out of sync with reality and just assumes it's at the nearby public activity, hence the swinging club avatar.

 

I agree about therapy. You're way too anxious and paranoid, no wonder he's distant with you. Please seek help. :)

Absolutely, FB location services tells me I am 50 KM from where I am.

[DanZee]

Where is the scratch on him?

[maew]

OMG I am ALWAYS scratching or bruising myself on things! When I am hiking, cleaning, working out, sometimes even when I am sleeping haha... some of us are just clumsy and bump into stuff.

 

This has nothing to do with him... this is about you and your lack of trust in him.

[moodindigo91]

I have scratches and bruises everywhere, I am clumsy and walk into things often, it happens. I wouldn't want to be with someone who constantly questioned every mark on my body thinking it was part of some elaborate scheme to cheat on them...

 

He is too egotistical and narcissistic to ever harm himself.

 

This line kind of made me do a "yikes" () face when I read it... those are usually used as negative descriptors of people... if this is how you see your boyfriend (paired with your absolute absence of trust in him) you really should consider ending this relationship. Also, I do find it a bit insensitive, considering that this might not be a true and accurate description of your boyfriend, since people often hide how they really feel and egotistical or narcissistic behavior can often be a front...

[dias]

If the scratches are in the middle-upper back it could indicate something otherwise you don't have any reason to connect them with cheating. In any case, if you don't trust him why are you with him?

[DancingFool]

Seriously? There has to be some little voice inside of you screaming at you that this is completely insane. Dump this guy, get your sanity back and move on. You can't trust him and you are losing your sanity for what exactly? No man on this planet is worth what you are putting yourself through. None. Zip. Nada. Nothing. Dump him and you'll feel like a dark cloud just lifted off your head. I'm serious. Stop the madness.

[abitbroken]

If the scratches are in the middle-upper back it could indicate something otherwise you don't have any reason to connect them with cheating. In any case, if you don't trust him why are you with him?

 

Actually, i have gotten a scratch back there from a tree branch, coming down off a ladder. I had scratched and bruised myself on my upper back when i was ducking to walk under an overhang at my folks where the garbage cans rolled under and I stood up too soon coming out of it. Unless there is other evidence of him cheating --- ie, women leaving messages, he disappears overnight, etc, someone else's under wear in his bedroom --- having scratches in of itself are not in of themselves indicative of anything

[Coldarmy13]

Where is the scratch on him?

 

I don’t think any of that matters and that the scratch is a small part of a huge problem with the OP and this relationship.

 

Heck, you could scratch yourself anywhere. Especially in a garage if it’s even remotely cluttered or full. Even in spots where yes, a woman could have scratched with her nails. Someone posted don’t worry unless it’s on his back.. which is exactly where I pictured someone scratching themselves while navigating through a garage. Now if you see four scratch marks that could be nails.

 

Either way, the behavior you’re exhibiting is disturbing and I am surprised it hasn’t pushed him away. You obviously aren’t comfortable in this relationship and is giving you anxiety. Why stay?

[nessa8222]

Based on what you have stated, there is no logical reason to assume these marks are in any way related to infidelity. Lots of honest, committed people gets scrapes and bruises all the time and don't realize it until later on, especially when working physically demanding jobs or doing housework/yardwork. If you don't feel you can trust him, you should not be in the relationship. However, I would urge you to get professional help because this type of paranoia indicates underlying issues.

[Angmat]

It's the OP. Someone asked where the scratch is.

 

It's on the inside part of his right leg just below his knee.

[Seraphim]

It's the OP. Someone asked where the scratch is.

 

It's on the inside part of his right leg just below his knee.

 

That can happen anytime any place. That has happened to me just getting out of the car . It is indicative of absolutely nothing . If you don’t trust him you should break up now and save yourself the trouble .

[Coldarmy13]

It's the OP. Someone asked where the scratch is.

 

It's on the inside part of his right leg just below his knee.

 

You know something that far down his leg could almost literally be from anything..

 

More than that, it would be terribly difficult to hurt there In a sexual situation.

[boltnrun]

OP, how do you notice all these superficial injuries? Do you have him strip down and then you examine his body inch by inch?

 

Currently I have a 2 inch scratch on my wrist, bruises on my lower arms and a large bruise on my lower shin. None of which were obtained by engaging in illicit sex.

[Seraphim]

How are you getting pictures of HIS scratches ?

[Cheetarah]

This thread prompted me to self-examine. I have razor burn on my legs, long scratches on my arms from gardening, scratches on the back of my calves from the dogs jumping on me, abused mosquito bites. I also have a scratch near my eyebrow, tummy and one on the top of my shoulder. No idea how they got there, but I guarantee it wasn't from a hot romp.

 

But we can all tell you this and it's not going to alleviate your anxiety. Oh sure, maybe for a minute until you notice another blemish. But reading your other thread, you are crippled with the obsession that he is cheating on you. This is chipping away not only at your relationship but at your entire life and well-being. I can't imagine how miserable you both must be living like this - I think therapy would benefit you greatly. You're a prisoner to your own thoughts. Get some objective help - Not reassurance from people on whether a scratch is human or otherwise. That sort of thing is only enabling you and your anxiety.