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Andrina

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Andrina last won the day on October 11 2020

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About Andrina

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  1. Major differences like one wanting children and the other, not, should be a dealbreaker in itself. You entered into an emotional affair at work since you're lacking an emotional connection with your SO. After being together 2 years, it's best if you be alone 6 months to a year. Get your mind in the right headspace, mourning the end of a relationship, and giving yourself time before entering another one. I wouldn't go for the guy at work. He's probably knowingly crossed relationship boundaries with his SO. I'm sure he knows you have a crush on him, and it was inappropriate to share pe
  2. To me, it sounds like you're collecting a male harem. I work with mainly men, too. And we enjoy quick chats at work and I'm Facebook friends with some of them, but to my husband and I, it's overstepping bounds to give our numbers to anyone of the opposite sex for the objective of chatting throughout the day with them. Perhaps some couples are okay with that, but we're not. Since your mindset always goes to "I think this guy is into me," then the practice of giving out your number willy-nilly has to go by the wayside. If a guy asks for your number, you can say you and your bf have a rule
  3. Since you have a child together, get couples counseling. You haven't been able to fix issue on your own so a professional can teach you those skills. You owe your son a stable environment and if his parents can learn to be a mature, loving couple, that'd be the best outcome.
  4. I'm so sorry about the miscarriage. As for your man, basically, it's best to put things in the right mindset. That other woman doesn't owe you anything, but your bf does. He's accountable to you. If he's allowing you to become stressed because "a friend" is acting like she's claiming him as her territory and isn't a champion of you and him as a couple as a real friend would be, then it's on him for keeping her in his life. He saw that she was the reason for the demise of his past relationships. If he was serious about having a happy, lifelong relationship, he would've ended his friendship
  5. I suggested that I just grit my teeth and face my fears of highway driving and he strongly reacted that he doesn't want me to drive highways as he would worry to death about me driving them back and forth from seeing my loved ones or possibly an actual job I like but I need to do the commute. When I ask him to take me into the city half the time he complains or says he is to tired (his work makes him exhausted after, Just reading this, it sounds like he likes keeping you isolated. He shouldn't be feeding in to your fears. He should be supporting your desire to become independent on
  6. Cats are a bit more independent than dogs, but they still desire daily interaction with their human. My cat yowls whenever my husband so much as goes into the garage or outside to do yard work. Siamese are very vocal, but some breeds of cats aren't as vocal to let you know they are missing you, but they certainly are. I don't let mine out because a hawk might get her, she might be run over by a car and get in fights with others, or would be more susceptible to feline leukemia. I suggest is you have a job and/or a gf where you can't give your cat the attention he/she deserves, it'd be best
  7. There are some things you can compromise on, but major things like, marriage, kids, and where to live should be must-haves or you are sacrificing too much. There are other women who you will also get along with and who you could potentially love AND shares your life goals. Unfortunately, you will have to end things with your incompatible partner to find the partner who you are compatible with. Nobody said life was easy. We all have hard decisions to make. Take care.
  8. Have you ever heard this advice: that children shouldn't be meeting a significant other, and you're far from that, until it's established that you've been together long enough to decide the relationship is heading longterm? And that can't be known in the beginning honey moon stage. It usually takes going past the 10 month mark, or a year. Because children don't need a revolving door of strangers entering and quickly exiting their lives. You both are parents, and should both be getting your own children used to a new family dynamic of divorce rather than having your attention diverted
  9. I'd have another discussion and ask: Just wondering who called who, and if he said he was interested in getting back together, why did you have to meet in person rather than telling him your answer on the phone? I'm sure she wouldn't have remained as calm if you'd done something like that with an ex. I'd be concerned if she was gauging if you're someone who will put up with her remaining in touch with exes if that's her style. If you think she's worth continuing on with while finding out more about her as a person, I'd have a discussion and make your boundaries crystal clear wi
  10. Discuss relationship boundaries with one another. If they don't match, then you as a couple don't match. Matching boundaries should have been discussed at the beginning of the relationship. Better late than never before you invest even one more day into someone who is likely incompatible with you. Sounds like he hasn't matured beyond what most grow out of beyond the early twenties. Usually when people move into serious relationships, their friendships with opposite sex friends also usually evolves into something that doesn't negatively impact a couple.
  11. I'm assuming you're just taking his word for it that he doesn't pleasure himself daily with the porn. That would be the most logical reason he doesn't want to have sex with a real live woman as often as he used to. Read articles on porn addiction and you will see it actually changes the neurons of the brain. His go-to for arousal will be porn and a real woman doesn't do it for him as much anymore. How many months or years was the amount satisfactory for you? Does he work? Is he exhausted from work, not work, or is his energy level fine after work? Do you have a few days off together or do
  12. I usually have to give her in worries and platitudes because I can't talk at work. Data centers block most cell signal even... I'm just waiting for it to not be enough for her really cause I'm also scared to leave her because of all the anxiety and depression she is always going through So this is not about a joyous connection while communicating. It's giving in to someone who will pout or cry if her demand for attention isn't met, and also all the while knowing you could be fired for going against company policy. So hasn't she been surviving her entire life with the depression and a
  13. Even besides the other woman, your relationship was regressing rather than progressing beyond the honeymoon stage of the relationship. That's the reality and not the fantasyland of a blissful beginning. Too much bitterness, mistrust and emotional disconnection for this to have much chance of success.
  14. You feel toxic in the relationship. When you're in the right relationship, you'll feel like you're a better person because of your partner's support and love. This is the opposite. His comment that other men would have left by now is a common comment made by abusers who seek to control you. And it's not constructive criticism. People who know how to communicate issues properly do it without bashing their partner. You're stressed, avoid sex, and break dates because you're tired of being bashed. Be alone and build up your self esteem, or you will likely repeat the same pattern of datin
  15. You weren't that into him if you didn't make it happen with him. You did him a favor by freeing him to be with a woman who will be crazy about him. Feel good about that instead of wallowing in the past. You didn't make a mistake.
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