keeponsmiling

I will post anyway because i think i will have to go soon anyway. But yeah, i have experienced exactly the same thing only a few days ago.. (4 month relationship) and i am hurting so much and jesus, i am so confused. I also had that same 'happy cuddly bit' only just last week, i have no idea where his feelings suddenly disappeared to. All his mates are confused too. It's not fair is it? Maybe he was too scared to be commited? Some guys are like that and it sucks. They think they can have everything! It takes time but you learn from each break up. You will have ups and downs and you will be so low you don't want to live and then every now and then you get a little feeling of happiness from someone or something. Gradually these happy times come more often and last for longer until one day the sadness doesn't come back.

I have never been the dumper and i have just been dumped. I hurt alot after breakups and my pain lasts alot longer than i let on and normally i channel my pain into anger which is not a good thing but it's my defence mechanism - safer to be angry than to hurt. The best way is to think positively about life, be happy about the people who are supporting you, talking about it with someone who makes you happy, crying when you need to instead of holding it back, try not to let yourself think about what you miss in the beginning because it makes it harder to let go. Eat good foods, do exersize and don't mope in the house.. and if people do try and make you feel better accept it and maybe act like it has helped, that way they will not feel useless and keep helping and finally it gets better and you will be so thankful for their support. I strongly agree with the N/C thing, although i am normally really bad at it, but this time round i am doing really well.. i called him the next night to have a civilised convo and that basically finalised it for me. But that was it. I am very proud. Never bad mouth the dumper if you wish to stay friends and not cause a fuss, if you are nice and calm about it you don't make enimies and the dumper feels even worse! lol!

I know how you feel.. hey, PM me, do you have msn?

Everyone gets this, well, atleast i do and i am a girl. But yeah, being told by the person you like that your friend (friends normally have rivalries -spelling) is the one she prefer's could dent anyone. When my pride is wounded i normaly turn that hurt into anger and resentment.. not a very good thing to do as i have lost many months of friendship with people who needed my support and friendship, despite them hurting me. Do things that make you feel good about yourself, spend time with people who care about you. Talk about it, don't bottle it up. good luck with the healing x

Difficult times fall on the best of us.. stay strong and be there for your mother. I send my love and best wishes as nobody deserves to go through something like this. Also - i distinctly remember finding one of your posts highly amusing, it actully cheered me up in a time of utter dispair. This was a very long time ago on another account.. so thank you. I will keep you, your family and your mother in my thoughts and prayers.

Good thing i was nice and friendly about it to him and haven't contacted him since.. also i have done no bad mouthing to anyone accept my mum when i am angry at him. Life will go on, i have some great friends who are behind me. I think it could be something, an example could be when he got upset because i called him an idiot for standing on my glasses - it made him cry to tell me about a month later..

Come on someone I need some support here!

You are the same hight as me.. that's not that bad!! lol!

Hmm, healthy diet is good, red meat i think and eat your greens. Also, another thing, you are more than likely about to have a growth spurt, most of my mates have shot up in the last year (they are all about 15/16) so hold out and eat healthily!

I feel guilty now because i do agree with the other posts, but right now, i needed that post about revenge - we aint all saints

Ha! Quing is so hot right now!! That post has to be the best thing i have read in so long My boyfriend just broke up with me and i am hurting so much but that mental image of being like 'er no thanks' if he came back just made me laugh so hard! You rock, keep being sexy and don't let anyone get you down YOU ARE THE SEX!

It's different with different people and different relationships and how people feel about their partners. I heard the other day about this chemical that is released into your body when you are really attracted to someone (genetic makeup is different - chemical romance and it this chemical makes you forget everything else and just focus on that one person. This chemical stays in your body for about a year.. that is long enough to concieve a child and go through pregnancy. Our primative bodily make up. So, if you really actully deeply like someone it will probably take about a year, but in school it could be alot less and we are all testing relationships out and it's all hit and miss. does that make sense? lol

Sounds like something else that could have been there from long back is getting to him. Maybe he believes that sexual stuff is wrong, maybe he feels insecure? Keep trying with the support and talking about it. Maybe if he understood sex and things like that it might be easier for him to enjoy himself and want it more. Would he concider maybe seeing a counciler? sounds weird but they might be able to professionaly put a finger on what is going on in his head. Does he find you attractive? he must!! Maybe he thinks it's wrong to push you?

Wow.. that is so amaizing. It's so magical! It sounds like you are living this perfectly, the friendship you have seems wonderfuly innocent and happy. Keep it, maybe she will find that emotion she wants in you..

Sound's like he's not too sure what he wants but also that he is trying to make you jealous.. guys are annoying and don't like to be tied down, maybe he wants the best of all worlds. Also sounds like he is moody and slightly selfish. very selfish actully. If you really like him maybe you could bring it up, what you don't want to do it hurt yourself, if you think having sex with him will toy with your emotions then i would try and get over him, but if it is what you want don't deprive yourself.

Okay, dumper's please could you tell me your reasons for breaking up and analyse this as i have never broken up with someone and i am so weirded out and shocked. My boyfriend, who i believed i was in a very stable relationship with, has just finished with me out of the blue. We have had exams recently so our relationship has always been under pressure of exams (4 month relationship). His mother and father have given him a very hard time - first we weren't alowed the door shut and that kind of stuff then he wasn't allowed to come to my house until after exams. The other is very controling and basically took that fuzzy feeling away by constantly keeping us appart. She had to have control - if we did see each other it was only because either he had lied or his mother had suggested it. The guys is also a botteler, he keeps things inside and if he gets hurt by something it's hard for him to say. It was also his first relationship. But, despite all this we were amaizingly happy - best of friends and enjoying life to the full, many a time i would see him and he would have made something for me or written me a poem or painted me a picture. The relationship was very equal and we talked about everything. We also had time to ourselves and saw our other friends (we live about 30 mins drive away from each other) But, last week he didn't talk to me or contact me for 3 days and then finished with me on saturday night saying that he had just stopped liking me. The worst thing is that i had been to his house and seen him on wednesday, we had been very physically close and he had iniciated it!! He then told me on saturday that he had already decided to break up with me that day.. i feel used and hurt by someone who i trusted so deeply and know is a nice person. I am so confused and hurting so much, any insight on any of this would help me.

Yeah, i've just been broken up with and it's hard for the person who has been dumped to understand why their partner doesn't want the same thing. What people find very difficult to understand is that one person will hurt more than the other. Tis just a fact of life, you may feel awful but in a different way to the person dumped and sadly the person dumped will often get the sympathy.. fact of life.

Yeah, i feel another post coming on.

Thanks guys, not that it helps, he broke up with me last night.. didn't see that coming..

The most romantic thing is when you really like someone and they really like you and you have never kissed before, maybe because there hasn't been a chance etc, and then, you get closer and closer and suddenly you kiss and it feels like the whole world around you is exploding and you get this huge adrenaline rush in your stomache.. I have only ever had this once, but i will never forget it!

It's great Once you get into a more physical relationship, you won't feel embarrassed atall. We all know what kissing finally leads too

I am 15 and in a reallly fantastic relationship with my bf. The other day we performed oral sex on each other, when i did it to him it was great and he loved it ( i have done this before with last bf but i never felt happy about it - this time was great) when he did it to me i wasn't really that turned on but i said i was.. bad idea i know. Anyway, it was really nice and i loved it up until the point where all of my face went numb and my forearms seemed like they were paralysed!! I was so weirded out and it really scared me. I had to ask him to stop because i was just so full of... feelings i was crying, i couldn't help it and i was shaking aswell. He was lovely about it and cuddled me for ages. I'm not sure what im asking for here, just someone who could give some insight, maybe ideas so that i feel more comfortable? I'm just confused and feeling vunerable at the moment. Anyone understand??