misery12

The only way you will lose what you currently have, is by not doing anything at all. You said it yourself that you and friends always talk (her included). So just make a funny comment or something, make sure you make eye contact with her, but don't stare her down. Maybe when you go to class, you can come up beside her and just bring up something you and the group were talking about, or ask her about something that is happening at your school.. etc. There are thousands of things to relate to, you just have to find something that fits your situation. Summer is coming, so try and get closer to her, so you can get even closer through the summer, and hook up for a new school year good luck man.

hey, it's me again.. anyways, things have gotten better with me and my ex girlfriend. I talked to her today after school, and we sorted things out, she says she still wants to hang out like we did when we were going out.. as in.. her coming to my cottage, us hanging out, going to movies, things like that. She says she wants to still do it. But I guess without intimacy of any sort. The thing I was wondering about was.. do you think that if I just act cool, and don't pressure her. .and just ask her to come watch a movie friday night or something, and if she comes to my cottage with my family, sooner or later she wil realize she likes me? she may not like me now.. but instead of getting the feeilngs back, she could just start them again. If we spend time together in the summer, and I make an effort for us to spend time together, this could be okay. I just want to hang out with her, her company makes me happy, and I don't need to be making out with her, to be smiling. Today she told me she still wants to hang out like we used to.. and I said I dont want to just ask you over friday night to watch a movie, and she said, "why not". So do you think I should just go for it? not make any signal that it's more than friends, but just be normal/casual. Also, how do I act if we're alone, and we used to be intimate.. but now we're just frineds. Thanks a lot!

No, she is 14.. She is 14 years old.. and she doesnt have a drinking problem.. she was just pretty smashed that night. I was completely sober. I am not going to go and get her into trouble, because that leads me nowheres, she is so young, and I don't want to sound like her father when I talk to her. I want to tell her that she is changing for the worst, and that all of her friends are noticing. But I think I should wait until she talks to me.

I am broken up.. after 5 months, and making good friends with her family, and all my hard work, it's over. She told me she wants to remain friends, and talks to me whenever I come online, and at school, but this weekend her, and her friends were drunk, and they invited me over, so when i arrived, they were really out of it.. and later in the night, my ex said "what are you doing here.. just go home" then stormed out.. this is after she broke a mirror, and a desk and kept syaing how big of an idiot she was. I wasn't drunk or anything, and I was just sitting there, and her frined felt so bad for me.. because I sat there and took being told off by my ex who I would have done so much for.. Today she talked to me on MSN, and I was like "you need to learn to keep your mouth shut" or something, and she said she didn't remember it at all.. and she told me not to talk to her, until I tell her, so I said, okay cya later. But she said she doesn't remember?? but she remembers everything else that happened that night.. she is changing for the worst, she isn't the same girl as I fell in love with, and all of her frineds say she's changing too.. and they don't like it. She's moody, and likes drinking and stuff.. like on weekends.. she used to not care if she fit in.. as long as we had fun. What do I do?? It hurts so much to not talk to her.. because she has such a big part of me.. one second she seems interested in talking to me.. then the next day.. something else happens.. What can I do?

Yeah, I guess I am just thinking, why does she want to hang out with me.. and why doesn't she just say, we're over? She has kept me in her life.. at least. I am not expecting a miracle, but at least I can try, right? But don't worry, I won't sacrifice my happiness for a girl, I know it's not worth it. I will just be a fun guy, it will all fall as it may in the end.

Alright, I get you now I can do it.. I just need to get my head on straight.. I was just all wound up after it all.. I am just answering all of my questins one by one. Also, our semi is coming up... it's our last dance, and I want to ask her to go, she doesnt have anyone to go with, and her friends think I should go.. we used to always play cards at school.. in the cafeteria, do you think I should do something funny.. like write something on one of the cards and deal it out, making sure she gets it in her hand, and then keep playing on..like i dont know whats going on.? and just do it in a humouros way.. so she knows im not taking it super serious, so she doesnt feel pressured.

So, if I show her how much fun I can be.. and what she sort of lost.. and even though she broke up with me.. I can still go out and make her laugh, she will maybe be like "why did I break up with him" or will she think "wow he's really changed now, im glad we're friends"

Oh, I am pretty stable.. right now. I am not crying or anything, I was pretty bummed out a few days ago.. but I found my inner strength, and realized I can't love someone without loving myself. I know my boundaries, and my limits, and I think that this weekend will be a fun time. She really wants to keep going with it, and I am looking forward to it, I am not fearing my feelings, I am not going to explode if I don't tell her. I just need some advice on when I should say something.. or will she come to me?? and how can I increase my chances of her coming to me.. I just want a second chance.. she still seems like she has feelings for me, a little bit at least, just by the way she;s acting, and it was 5 months, she cannot just forget everything in 2 days. School is coming to an end too soon, so I dont want to put it off too long, so what is your advice besides "don't ask her" what should I do???? when.. how..thanks

Yeah, man it's just tough.. I am new to the dating thing, but I do know she's the one I want. If I don't ask her.. then what do I do, besides "not asking her"

Hey, I was in a relationship with my ex for 5 months, which we were really serious about each other, close to families, and such. Anyways, she broke up with me on monday telling me that she just felt like being frineds, and we didn't talk the next day.. until after school when she sent me an email saying how badly she wanted to be friends with me, because she "loves" hanging out with me. So now we're back to takling at school, I give her space though. I do my own thing, she does hers.. and then we just hook up with some friends for 15 mins or so, and chat. We are hanging out this weekend at my house while my parents are at the cottage .. about 6 of us friends. She knows I still have feelings for her, but I told her I wont let them get in the way of us having a good time, and that made her happy.. she said okay I guess I am just wondering if I should ask her if there is a chance if us ever getting back together?? I was thinking about doing it this weekend when we're all hanging out. For the past 3 days I haven't even mentioned our relationship, because that would probably push her away, or feel pressured, so I have just been cool/smart/funny and a fun guy to be around, I had her and all of her friends laughing today. And she came up to me to talk, and after school said "hey" to me on MSN. I was just wondering if I should just keep doing what I am doing.. and then in some time.. ask her if there's a chance.. but how long do I wait? I dont wnat to wait too long.. because being together for the summer would be awesome.. so many fun times could be done.. and make us stronger.. what should I say to her?? and when is a good time? P.S = we have our prom in about a week or so... 10days.. and I was thinking of asking her.. as friends, her friends think I should ask her, and she has nobody else. Thanks a lot!

Hey, My ex and I have been broken up since Monday, but we have spoken everyday since, because she told me she wants to be my friend "soooooooooooooo" bad because she loves hanging out with me. We are hanging out this weekend, with a few friends, and it should be a fun night, my parents are gone, so it's just going to be 5 of us or so. We were together for 5 months or so, and I am close to her family, and she's close with mine, she just ended it because seh said it felt more like a friendship. I was just wondering if there's anything I can do.. so she gets the feelings back? So far.. I am acting cool/funny around her. Talking to other girls, but not flirting to make her jealous, just to show her im attractive. She comes and talks to me a lot now, and seems happy to see me. I don't talk to her as much after school, I am sort of giving her space, to show her I don't depend on her to be happy, even though I contanstly think about her. This weekend I am going to be a great host, (even though she's been here so many times) im going to be funny/cool/smart. Hopefully she will see that I am sort of changing and will remember how much fun I am to be around, and the feelings may come back, I am taking it slow, and am not talking about our relationship at all with her, just so I dont push her away. She just started talking to me right now too We only have 9 days of school left, and I want to hang out with her in the summer too, any advice on my situation for an outcome to my benefit, thanks!

Alright, thanks a lot roofer! I totally understand what you're saying. Maybe she wasn't ready.. or just needs time on her own, we still talk everyday. I came up to her and her frineds today and we had a very funny conversation. Then later on, she came up to me. We are really close, and can talk very easily. I guess I am a little worried that summer will come before we totally patch things up, and she will just stop trying... I want to be with her in the summer, but there is still 2 weeks of school and then exams. So maybe in this time, we can patch things up. She, and some friends are coming over saturday night, so im just going to be a great host, be funny, charming, and just show her that I am still attractive. She sent me an email the other day saying how badly she wanted to stay friends because she loves hanging out with me. Maybe she still has slight feelings for me, and I can work on those? I am not mentioning anything about us.. and I am just being a cool, funny, fun to be around guy. I am also talking to other girls. .but not flirting, so she see's that I am attractive.

If you haven't seen yet, please visit my previous post, it's short. link removed I really need help on this situation with my ex girlfriend.. it's been 2 days, and we didn't talk at school yesterday, but after school she IM'ed me at 2 different times. Today she came up to me, and we all talked in a group of friends. I still have strong feelings for this girl, due to the fact I was with her for 5 months, and I am pretty close to her family now too. Her sister especially, even her sisters boyfriend, loves me. It's really hard to cope with too. Her friends love me, and say hi to me in the halls now too. I want my ex to like me again, I want to be able to get back together with her, and have continue on with our relationship. My mom loves her.. and her sister told me yesterday that she would go home and tell her family all about me.. and what we did at our house, and how fun it was. It kills me to think I will lose this.. She still wants to keep our plans this weekend, 5 of us friends (including her) are watching fireworks/ then parade the next day.. and then hanging out at my house for the night. Is this a good thing, for me?? could this be my chance to show her that I can be like I was when we first started going out, funny/nice. I think she felt that we were just friends.. so she broke it off. But she has to have some feelings right?? What can I do? She is the only one I want. Please help!

I don't know! at all it's so hard.. seeing her, because all I see are our memories.. but I dont want to call off our friendship either, because I want her in my life.. more than anything. SO it's so tough.

If you haven't seen yet, please visit my previous post, it's short. link removed I really need help on this situation with my ex girlfriend.. it's been 2 days, and we didn't talk at school yesterday, but after school she IM'ed me at 2 different times. Today she came up to me, and we all talked in a group of friends. I still have strong feelings for this girl, due to the fact I was with her for 5 months, and I am pretty close to her family now too. Her sister especially, even her sisters boyfriend, loves me. It's really hard to cope with too. Her friends love me, and say hi to me in the halls now too. I want my ex to like me again, I want to be able to get back together with her, and have continue on with our relationship. My mom loves her.. and her sister told me yesterday that she would go home and tell her family all about me.. and what we did at our house, and how fun it was. It kills me to think I will lose this.. She still wants to keep our plans this weekend, 5 of us friends (including her) are watching fireworks/ then parade the next day.. and then hanging out at my house for the night. Is this a good thing, for me?? could this be my chance to show her that I can be like I was when we first started going out, funny/nice. I think she felt that we were just friends.. so she broke it off. But she has to have some feelings right?? What can I do? She is the only one I want right now. Please help!

My ex and I are now just friends since our break up yesterday. We were together for 5 months, and in the beginning we were fine.. I think because we were getting used to each other, and we loved talking to each other. She would always message me as soon as I came on.. right away, but then we started getting to know each other, and I think she felt that we were becoming more like friends? But I see couples who talk all day at school, and then go home and talk on the phone.. and their fine. Maybe it;s because we didn't really kiss for a couple of months :S. 2 weeks ago she gave me a Hand Job at our cottage.. and I kissed her no the cheeck, but no real, intimate kiss. We agreed on it, after we both realized that staying together at the time, would result in not being even friends in the end. We talked 3 different times tonight, her starting each of the conversations online. She sent me an email after school saying how much she loves hanging out with me and wants to be friends "soooooooooooooooo" badly. I told her that this is great, and that I still have feelings for her, but I won't let them get in the way of us having a good time. This made her really happy. All of her friends are telling me they don't know what got into her, and why she broke up with me.. I talked to her, and she told me she can't remember it being serious.. I want a serious relationship with her, and I want to get back together with her. Today, at school.. I talked to her sister who is a year old than I am.. and I am close to. When she found out, she was pretty angry at her sister.. and was telling me that her mom will be sad because she really liked me.. and so does she. This made it even harder, because I now know I made an impact on more than just one person in the relationship. Her sister talked to her after school.. and I think that's what knocked some sense into her. We are continuing with our plans that we made for 5 of us this weekend, fireworks/parade.. my ex wanted to still do it. Anyways, I am sort of confused now.. she told me that she loves talking to me.. and that she loves hanging out with me, and how it was weird that we didn't talk at school today. All of her friends, and her sister think that in a week or so, she will change her mind, and will come back to me.. I think she maybe just wanted a break? We talked very well tonight, and it was a funny conversation. I want to know how I can make it so she wants to come back to me.. and realizes what she had with me. I don't want to guilt her into anything.. I just want her to come back, because we were perfect. Besides the kissing thing.. if we do get back together, what can I do to make it seem more of a relationship, even if we spend a lot of time together. also, what can I do.. for us to become one again.. do I just give her some space.. and time, just be her friend..? what? Thanks a lot!

Oh my god man, I cannot tell you how much this relates to my relationship. I was with my girlfriend for 5 months or so.. and yesterday she said she just wanted to be friends. I think she didn't feel the same way as before.. but we are friends now.. and I think in time, we'll get back together. But anyways, the only thing shining through here, is your insecurity, and you seem not happy at all. Your confidence and self respect seem so low, that if she suddenly logged offline, without saying goodbye or something small, that it would hurt you deeply. This is not healthy, you cannot act like this.. as much as girls like emotion in relationships, they don't want a drama queen, as a king. As tough as it may be, you have to be strong, try talking to your mom or something about this, that's what I did, they're actually very supportive! Maybe try No Contact for a few days.. it didn't work with me.. because I just had to talk to her... but what I did realize was, that she was the one that was starting to send the messages first saying 'hey'. I think she probably feels that you are too insecure, and she is not as attracted to you as she was.. because you are starting to lack confidence.. it's a big circle man... you are lacking confidence, because you're scared she will break up with you, but she will probably break up with you, if you're lacking confidence. You have to break this chain. Try getting out with friends, and get your mind of things. Not to mention this is long distance, and these things are hard enough as they are. You have to show her that you are worth staying with... if she feels the only thing she gets if she stays with you.. is a guy that is always nervous.. and insecure. she wil be like "screw this" you know? You can hurt on the inside, but for now.. be strong on the outside. Try holding back your feelings for a while, and let her make the next move.. she should realize that you are not being as available.. sort of like you were when you started going out. As for the funny/joking thing goes.. this is because you did this in the beginning, to sort of break the ice.. but then you got to know each other, and calmed down.. try and joke around with her still.. as hard as it might be.. just do it for her.. if you love this girl... try and make her happy.. but don't sacrifice your own happiness for her. It's not worth it. Know your limits, and let her make the next move.. be strong. Good luck man.

I can read it.. He is 14, you guys can clearly read it and would rather make fun of him than help him with his question. Anyway man, there is no real time-line in life for kissing or anything, I've seen 5 year olds kiss.. if you and a girl like each other, and are falling in love, and you both are within a few years of the same age.. then there is no real problem. As for the bases go.. I wouldn't have sex or anything like that, for a year or so.. if that. For one, you may want it.. but your girl may not. If you're a real man.. then you will be a man, and respect your lady, and wait until she's ready. If you can't wait.. then you don't deserve to be with her. Deep down, you know your limits, if you find yourself thinking, am I pushing the envelope? you probably are. Just go slow, and only do things you know the girl wants to do.. If you say you're mature, act mature about it.. and don't do it for bragging rights either. Good luck man, I hope everything works out for you.

Are you planning on committing suicide, is the main question.

I don't know what to write.. good poem.?

So, you are saying to be around her.. so she still see's that I am there, but do not mention "us" because it might push her away, and in time she will make the next move.. how long do you think before she makes the move? a group of us (5) are hanging out this weekend. fireworks/parade, her included. Today after school she sent me a message saying how bad she wants to be friends... so this means she wants me in her life, badly. So I should just hang out with her.. but not as her boyfriend, or lover?? Should I tell her that I do still have strong feelings for her, and that I will not let them get in the way of us having a good time?

Hey, me and my ex just broke up yesterday after a 5 month relationship.. she said that she was forgetting about it being serious, and it started feeling too much like friends. She still wants to be good friends.. and she sent me an email today saying that she loves hanging out with me and wants to be friends sooooooooooo bad. I am really close with her sister who is a year older than I am. I talked to her today, and she told me that their mom loved me.. and will be crushed. That really hit me.. I love knowing I made an impact on her whole family. But it hurts to know I may lose that forever. When she got home.. her sister I guess b*tched her out.. and was asking how she could be so stupid. All of my ex's friends love me too , and always say how good I am to her. So I have a feeling this will straighten out my ex.. I think she's just confused.. because everyone wants us back together, and I know it's about me and her.. so I was just wondering what I can do at this point to let her know I still really like her, without pushing her away.. I want to get back into a relationship with her.. my mom loves her.. and we have so many memories together. Any advice on what to do?? Me, my friend, my ex, and a few of her friends are planning to hang out all weekend.... Any advice on how to get back with her.. and be happier than before.. and be more like a relationship.. thanks so much

Hahaha.. you did what you deserved to do.

Update: I am really close with her sister.. who is a year over me.. and her sisters boyfriend. I talked to her today, and she was totally surprised.. and she said that her mom loves me.. and will be torn apart. This hurt me.. because I don't want to lose all my hard work anyways, my (ex) girlfriend's friends all talked to me after school too, and they all love me.. and don't know what got into her.. and my (ex) girlfriend herself, sent me an email saying "Hey.. i was just wondering if were friends becuase i still want to be soooooooo bad becuase i love hanging out with you." People are saying that if I take it slow.. she will miss me, and realize what she had.. and we'll be back together. I am not expecting this... but if it does come, how can I make it seem more like a relationship, and what should I do.. to improve my chances of getting back together based on the info you have. Thanks so much everyone.

I love this girls company.. It wont be too hard either, for the past month or so, we've just been acting like best friends, we haven't kissed in months, and we barely do anything sexual, and never hug, or anything. SO it won't be too hard.