Hunny1607307342

Thanks everyone for advice. I can TOTALLY relate to you guys, especially sugarcube and bkjsun!!! Totally. That's exactly how I feel. And the thing about am I TOTALLY over my ex? No I can't be because like I said I still care about what he's doing who he's with etc., and I think the only way to stop that is to have a new bf! Then I can and will devote myself to him 100% and appreciate him so much! But there's no one I feel that way about. But oh well, I guess I have no choice other than to just make the most of my life as it is really...and be patient.

I've just broken up. I feel like I'll be single for years. Out of 400 guys at college I only liked one of them. A girlfriend for you will come along when you least expect it. I was just recently told the reason I'm upset about being single is because I attach happiness way too much to having a gf or bf. But you can still be happy without someone to rely on - its safer that way if your heart doesnt belong to anyone. Just live life and love it without the need of having someone to lean on - be independent and happy You'll get over this girl, she's not meant to be, no matter how much you make think it. Everything happens for a reason. Good luck!

LOL thanks a lot for the advice, yes, I force myself to look at him in disgust!

hehe ok thanx dare devil I'll try to slap myself when I think about him...but I see the slime rat everyday at college.

lol your right thats what it is! I attach happiness to a bf WAY to much! But I can't help it. Maybe that's because my ex boyfriend was my first boyfriend. I was happy as a singleton before him! But then I realised how amazing life can be with a bf and the fact that he gave me the rush of my first kiss etc. and then when I lost him... Basically, its like giving a blind child sight for a few hours!

True...but when you're with someone doesn't that make other things that are going well not matter? Like, when my college reports are AWFUL, and I had HIM, I was like "oh whatever! but in the opposite situation, ie. having good college reports and the absense of a boyfriend, doesn't really make me feel like saying 'whatever' about not having a boyfriend. lol.

Hey, I have realised that my EX just wasn't the ONE. I have accepted that it just won't happen again... BUT regardless of this, I STILL CARE. I can't help it. E.g. I am dying to know what his new girlfriend is like. Whatever I do that is successful, I want him to know about it. Each time I look good, I want him to see me. It really bugs me that the slime rat has a better life than me because he HAS A GIRLFRIEND. They say the best revenge is living well, and I'm doing that far as it can go. But there will always be the fact that I don't have a boyfriend. Problem: I am SO FUSSY: Out of a 6th form of 400 guys, he was the only one I fancied madly. I will be single for at least a year - I know it. I hate this chunk of my life which is missing. I want to feel that WAY again, not about him because he's a jerk, but I miss feeling AMAZING about someone! And then I wont care about him anymore 100%. Until then, HE is the only one I want to please all the time, even if I dont want to get back with him. I can't help it. *Sigh*... what do you think?

You can ride a bike and break your hymen. That doesn't mean you lost your virginity to a bike lol. You lose your virginity the first time you actually have sex. You lost your virginity to your current boyfriend so don't be sad!

hahaha I had this before. "So who do YOU fancy", and I just thought shizer the only person I fancy the pants off is you. OBviously I didn't say that. I said I'm not telling, and then he got all pushy, so I thought fine I'll make im some excuse and said "I don't know yet i have to get to know people better I don't fancy people just like that". But really if I planned I would of said something like: "wouldn't you like to know" "That's for me to know, for you to find out"... "I would tell you...but then I'd have to kill you"

Everyones different...mainly the ones listed here. General advice: you're much more attractive if your a happy person. Smiling is important, you come accross as warm and nice if you smile at someone when you see them.

You're not a player your just a mega flirt. If you were planning on kissing all these girls, and actually did, THAT make you a player.

I got played... but I knew he was a player, so it was my own fault. He was the biggest sweet-talker ever, flirted with all the girls. Came accross really sweet!! He asked me on a "date" but it wasn't really a DATE, charmed all the way. I think players like to keep their options open, so he told me he wanted a girlfriend quite a few times...oh yeah, key thing, PLAYERS WILL NEVER ADMIT TO BEING PLAYERS! I asked him straight, and he denyed it, and made excuses for things he'd done in the past, such as "I was confused, I was drunk" etc. etc. Nothing happened after our "date". MIXED SIGNALS are a thing to look out for. TELLING YOU HE'D CALL WHEN HE WONT!! And basically just taking AGES to ask you out officially. Waste of time, if only I'd known from the start. He pulled me and then pretended it was because he wants a relationship, but really he didn't. He just said that because he didn't want to seem like a jerk. Players lie like a rug. Good luck!

Thanks guys I'll try and be happy! It's early days yet though...plus seeing him everyday - letting go might take a WHILE. One fine day I will though!

Thanks annie. You're right, I will be living it up infront of him, smiling and being happy. Of only making out with a hottie 5x hotter was that easy!

= EMOTIONAL BREAK-DOWN!!! Cannot handle. What does she look like? Is she prettier than me? Does he say all those things he used to say to me to her? Of course he does, but he didn't he mean those words when he said them to me, so does that mean he doesn't mean them when he says them to her? Will he stay with her for a long time? He probably saw her whilst having this unofficial relationship with me, because otherwise HOW can he move on so quickly, he obviously never cared about me. Basically he lead me on for a few months, made out with me, all the rest of it and kept reassuring me we'll be official when his exams finish. To cut the story short he told me a lot of lies and it ended in him stating we should just be friends. I see him everyday at college. Revenge: flirt, get him drunk, kiss him passionately, his girlfriend will find out he's a cheat (better sooner than later), she'll dump him, he'll be heart-broken just like I am. I probably sound like a pyscho lol any words of wisdom guys?xxx

Thanks guys! And bkjsun, thanks for sharing the story...made me think a little. I won't be shouting at him. I'll keep my pride, but I might be dropping in a little light-hearted comment mid-conversation in order to find out how long he's been seeing her, whether it clashed with us... I just NEED to make sense of the past few months of my life. That's what it is...I need to know what I've been living. THEN I will move on.

thanks - I also like the classic 'I will survive' by gloria gaynor

thanks keenan yeah its the freak who prounces on me with hugs haha... my God I just keep asking myself all these questions like where did she come in... was it before or after he told me THIS or THAT...and it kills me because he had exams for the first few weeks, and I remember him he kept on reassuring me to WAIT WAIT for his exams to finish and THEN it we could make official, he kept telling me to wait JUST A COUPLE OF WEEKS - I did witness his crazy amounts of studying so I knew he wasn't lying... and I just think, so where did she come? Would things have been different if he didn't have those stupid exams? Because we would already be official right? Dont worry I'm not expecting you to answer all of these questions, I'm just expressing my thoughts for the sake of it! Thanks for advice x x

Thank u Echo & RayKay!... I will be living it up infront of him and having a good time, but if I ignore him wont it look like im bothered about his new girlfriend.. and thereforeeee that I am mad at him? I dont know, I think I'll just be polite like you said and try and say not much else... but I dont kind of want to know if I was someone he cheated on with... see... it's a right that I have... OKay okay how about "Hey?! how was your half term blablabla oh I met up with matt blabla oh yeah and sam said he saw you just the day before coming back from your girlfriends - since when did you have a girlfriend you dark horse?!" Can I say that?

Hey guys thank you so much for your support!!!! It's just we only broke it off a couple of weeks ago... so I don't get how he can find someone so soon, and after telling me he doesn't even want a serious relationship, so why is he going around calling this girl his girlfriend? I know 100% this was a girlfriend because it came out of his own mouth apparently. But all this time I've been so innocent and naive, and agreed to be friends with him, putting up with his flirty attitude only because I had no reason to be angry at him. He's been so sweet to me in how he explains things, I can't just suddenly be off with him. But I'm looking for a reason to be off with him...In his eyes, do you think I have a right to be angry at him after he realises I found out about his girlfriend? I'm planning on asking him how long he's been seeing her for, because if it was while our "thing" was happening, then I can call him a liar, and BE ANGRY AT HIM TO HIS FACE for once! Finally prove to him I'm not a naive innocent girl... It will make me feel more satisfied... What do you think?

Okay, I don't know how many people know about my story, but I was with a guy at college for quite a few months, although nothing was ever official, he told my friend he was going to surprise me for Valentines Day etc. etc. it was really amazing I thought. Then we had this "what his this" talk, and he was going round in circles telling me how special and amazing I am, but that he can't have a full on relationship at the moment (after being hurt last time). He suggested an open relationship, but then next day he told me that all this isnt fair on me and that we work better as "just friends". I have to see this guy everyday, be in a room with him every morning for about half an hour, and also having him flirt with me with no strings attached. I was getting through my break up, slowly, but I thought I was UNTIL.... my friend told me that he bumped in the guy, COMING BACK FROM HIS GIRLFRIEND'S PLACE. I was like what?! What girlfriend?! GIRLFRIEND?! Everything is now 10 times worse and I keep thinking SINCE WHEN HAS HE HAD THIS GIRLFRIEND!? Since he was seeing me?! Afterwards? What is she like... Help me please I'm so crushed beyong words! xxx Plus if you can tell me the likely hood of SINCE WHEN has he had her then I'd like to know thanks

I know what you mean - my ex told me to have a good holiday after we were breaking up for half term, and then after he went, he was like "I love you loads okay...", maybe expecting me to say something back, but I didn't, because I knew he didn't mean it. He broke US, so why would he try and fix it... sad but true.

He sounds like a jerk if I may say so! Okay I'll give him a brownie point for at least telling you what the relationship was while you were in it, but he sounds extremely confusing. You shouldn't settle for what he was willing to give you. Quite frankly, no matter how much you like him, if he were to come back to you saying "I'm sorry please take me back", you should NOT say yes; it will just make you look like his puppy being strung along, listening to whatever he says (such as agreeing to what seemed like an 'open relationship' before). Because at the end of the day, if he really truly liked you, he wouldn't have risked losing you so easily, so many times. And don't you want a guy who really truly likes you? I know he said he told you all these sweet things, but thats guys for you!! Actions speak louder than words. So if you were to take him back, it seems this would never really work out anyway, and you'd get your heart broken all over again. I think you should make sure this is the final time he hurts you, and don't let him do it again, by just not going back there. Think of this as a fling and MOVE ON! You deserve more than a guy who's not crazy about you. You deserve a guy who IS crazy about you, and who will text you and call you, and call you his girlfriend! You shouldn't settle for any less. Fear of intimacy is just a myth, if a guy really likes you he'll do anything to have you. One day the ONE will come and you'll be truly happy To your question about when it's truly over, it's when he said the words 'it's over'. He isn't likely to fix something he broke - which is okay, because you shouldn't let him either. So next time you feel the pain of rejection, just picture him in your mind, coming back to you telling you he wants to get back with you, and you saying no. If you know deep down that that's what you would say to him, it makes 'feeling rejected' a little pointless really

I know, I was fine about Valentines and thought I'd think nothing of it...BUT... I woke up...and I kept watching my phone. I didn't get anything though. No texts or anything! I've been pretty upset the whole day, but I'm going out to dinner with lots of my friends this evening, so that's something to be happy about. But I know it kills, I kept imagining him with this girl, and I imagine this girl to be 'perfect'...it KILLS!!! Also that a few weeks ago Valentines Day was supposed to be for me - he told my friend he was going to surprise me. But a couple of weeks ago he broke up with me... *sigh*, someone else is probably enjoying my surprise Don't worry there's lots of broken hearts wondering the streets on Valentines Day, you're not alone xxx

Oh yeah and I forgot link removed, its not that bigga deal but it lists the benefits of being single and stuff if you want something to smile about lol xXx