Hunny1607307342

i love this, i can relate to it a lot.

oh hmm.. so if he asked you back out again, what would you say?

what is it like seeing your ex after 7.5 months??

AFter 4 months of NC (apart from several random exceptions) me and my ex have begun to talk a bit, texting mainly. I texted him last night, he replied in the morning, we i texted him a life quote which reminded me of things he was saying a couple of days ago. General chit chat. Do you think it was cold hearted of me to end the texting convo by sending a message with an hour delay saying : oh ok. anyways im off for a jog now so i'll speak to you later.

almost 2 years down the line , reading my sent messages really takes me back. if you people who posted on this thread a couple of years ago happen to see this, just want you to know i DID end up going out with him and it was incredible and do you know what made me do so, the last few posts you left !!! it made me realise how stupid it would be to reject someone whos such a nice guy because im a nutter who likes bad boys . Well not anymoreee!! But the story ended sadly because we broke up after a year and a half (ie a few months ago) but still , a year and a half is a pretty big thing and turned out to be both of our first loves which is really sweet anyway thats all i wanted to say really!

Don't be rude; don't ignore her calls; but don't tell her exactly what your plans are and who you're seeing; evade her questions; be mysterious; BE BUSY. Good luck

Aw I find guys are sometimes really sneaky in hiding their emotions lol. Thank you all for all your advice it is really really useful . Infact speedingcars its funny you should say that because right when this guy was asking me out 7 months ago, I got my diary and wrote myself a note explaining how good I am single and all benefits ie I am happy phsychologically independent etc. lol i thought it would make me 'fine' if i were to break up. Its funny out things turn out.

Thank you so much for your response. Everything you said made so much sense. I wish my mind thought as logically as that. I know; because hes my friend, I need a shoulder to cry on that would normally be him. Its so hard. And I dont know if this is a 'forever' relationship - that's the sad problem, its the one thing that prevents me from making any clear cut decision. At one point I thought it wasn't, but then just as I thought maybe he is forever, this break up happens. I really don't know. I'm going to have to see what happens with the passing of time. Thanks again for your advice.

I have been going out with this guy for 7 months...we were best friends for a long time beforehand, so we felt like we knew each other inside out. He's loved me with all his heart and been there for me all the time. I dont think I initially was as hooked on him as he was on me, but over time I felt greatly attached. We started to become one. He never lied, and it was clear he was totally and utterly in love with me, he said he'd never felt this way before, and just declared that he'd never in a million years want to break up with me, and wants to stay with me forever. This is also my first serious relationship, so I was totally inexperienced, virgin (still am) and he's had a deep impact on me emotionally physically etc. he's taught me to discover happiness on a new level. Anyway, so everything's been fantastic, until College started back in September; workload; parental contraints; A level exams; revision periods; much time being apart... I wasnt able to keep the same consistancy in our relationship as there used to be during summer. This has started to backfire on me. Also, silly arguments augmented and he says I should be less argumentative (this surely is a quality he has too). We had another silly argument the other day (by silly i mean, really trivial, really) and he broke up with me. He said that I don't make any sacrifices for him, that I don't even tone down my argumentative nature apparently. He said that all I am is words words words and that someone who's crazy in love doesn't act the way I do. He said we don't belong together, the arguments, my lack of action, my lack of motivation to see him, it all sums everything up and delivers a clear message. Yesterday I was on the phone to him til about 4am and we had a really heated conversation. Ironically enough, I kept my cool, but he had the most hirrendous temper. He was saying things that made it feel like my heart was being ripped out : "I can't stand you; I can't STAND you" and many, many more things worse than that. I am constantly crying and cant keep a straight face in public. Tears just keep streaming down my cheeks. What shall I do? I'm thinking of just turning up at his door today spontaneously. I feel the need. I'm not sure if all of this is my fault. Opinions and advice would be greatly appreciated xxx

This is true. My boyfriend is really short, yet I surprisingly discovered that he's very well endowed. On the side note, I heard from guys: that black girls have big vagina's and thereforeeee must be suited for black men

Ok me and boyfriend: been going out for 2 months. We've never had sex before because I'm a virgin (he's not). But we always spend a long time fooling around, kissing, touching everywhere (he's always been happy with this). So that's what we were doing today BUT: Today was the first time ever he was "not feeling it". At first he was though, this is what is confusing. He says, he felt sexually frustrated (for the first time in our relationship) YET he says NOW sex is the last thing on his mind. He said it has NOTHING to do with me. I can't even explain it myself. Take a look at this online convo and PLEASE help me figure this out pleeeeeease! thanks XXX He says: i cant think about sex He says: or at leastt the idea dusnt turm me on He says: and yet i felt the frustration so bad I says: But isn't that kinda contradicting urself? He says: exactly! i dno He says: im pritty sure i felt frustrated He says: and now i jus cant He says: I dno whats wrong with them I says: Are u 100% sure u've been turned on other times? He says: YES He says: 100% He says: baby im not lying

Me and my boyfriend arent sexually active, I'm 17. I love knowing i turn him on sooo if it was me giving advice i'd say just be comfertable u dont have 2 back away !

Hmm... is it normal that my best kiss was not with my current boyfriend??? My best kiss was my first kiss. A guy I spent months trying to get. When he kissed me it wasn't night time, we weren't drunk, and I was totally not expecting it. My entire body must have tingled, my lips felt different afterwards, I felt different: I had just had my first kiss. At 16, was amazing!

I used to be SOOO insecure about my boobs. I'm almost flat chested, and I wear slightly padded bras and I used to think the same as you: 'what would my boyfriend think!!!' But, when a guy falls for you, he DOESN'T care about these things you worry about. Now I just don't care and I've accepted myself the way I am, because he likes me either way. It's also a step by step thing, I couldn't just go infront of him totally naked until he sees bits of me little by little, and slowly the comfort builds. A good tip; never tell a guy your insecurities, he probably won't have even noticed.

Oops I just realised that a thread REALLY similar to mine has already been posted! Sorry! But, just to add, afterwards once my boyfriend said to me "Do you really like it when I kiss your neck?" And I was like "yes!" and he said "Yeah cause you were making noises ....

Hi, I'm a virgin and not much experience, sooo my current and first boyfriend of about 2 months knows that we have to take it really slowly. There's just one thing i need to clarify... is it possible to orgasm without vaginal stimulation?? He's fingered me a few times, and it doesn't feel orgasmic (to be honest it even feels slightly uncomfertable for me), BUT during a make-out session, when he starts kissing and nibling my neck, I find that feels AMAZING!!! It sends chills down my spine and so my breathing gets a lot heavier and louder for this period of time. Boyfriend asked me a week ago if I've ever had an orgasm and I said 'I don't think so...' and he said to me a couple of days ago; 'oh it's interesting what you responded...' I wasn't bothered at the time so I didn't ask him to clarify what he means, but do you think he means I DO orgasm??

I agree with you but my boyfriend thinks there should be "some hair" there otherwise it looks childish. You could compromise... just leave some short shaven hair in the middle or something...

I know you'd rather DO subtle things rather than TELL HER how you feel, but I think it's slightly awkward if you do "suggestive" things without any words spoken. You've said yourself how confusing this whole 'barrier' is. On one hand you want to keep it, but on another you want to cross it. It's all too complicated. I'm going out with someone that used to be just my close friend, and he acutally 'asked me out' before trying to do anything romantic with me. We were talking about it the other day and agreed it would have been extremely awkward if he tried to kiss me beforehand. It would have just lead to confusion. Although this is just my experience, its different everytime, good luck anyways...

I've felt like exactly you...with the guy I'm with now. At the beginning I thought it just doesn't have that extra bit that makes it complete, and wandered why. Then he kissed me. It changed my mind a little, but not substantially. Then I decided that I might as well give him a chance, because i'd regret it. A few weeks of weeks on, I can confidently say there is passion, sparks... maybe its because we're just so similar in the way we think... and I guess you have to find him reasonably physically attractive. But in the first and second make out session sometimes my mind would wander off thinking 'is this the right thing to do?' - I still can't be 100% sure... but at least this way I know that I'm with a guy that will never break my heart and loves me the way everyone wants to be adored - my friends reassure me it would be crazy to let this one go. The only thing that bothers me sometimes is the thought that 'what if we broke up...would our friendship be ruined forever?' Apart from that it's absolutely great.

Thank you so much everyone for the advice, still a touchy issue to talk about though LOL although this is a good point: I do remember him mentioning one of his ex's only going out with him for his money. I even jokingly hinted it to him the other day, and he got pretty...'hot headed' LOL, he was like "excuse me, are you trying to say you spend more money than me" I got scared of it turning sinister so I said "chill I'm joking". I know stingyness is a turn-off but everything else about him is perfect! And I know for a fact he's not using me because I know him inside out since we were great friends for about 6 months beforehand, I know he genuinely really likes me... hmmm maybe I'll just have to let this go.

Hey, I was just reading a post about "are men expected to pay for dates" and a lot of people said after a while it becomes 50/50. But, most females also stated men usually insist on paying, if not always, certainly on the first date. BUT: What if he doesn't!? Date one (he asked me out): Milkshake bar, he is short of change, I end up paying for most of the bill. Date two: The bill was pretty much split in half. I could go on and on mentioning other dates too, but the most shocking ones were recently: it was HIS idea to go on a boat ride the other day, I PAID FOR BOTH OF US (because he said he'll pay for the drinks, which i must add were substantially cheaper than a boat!) Additionally, its our one month anniversary dinner on tomorrow and he asked me out to an italian restuarant, and shortly afterwards stating, "but I'm not sure what your price range is, how much are you willing to spend". It really frustrates me, because all my ex's wouldn't let me pay for a single thing. My last ex paid for me from the moment I met him, and i can confidently say would still pay for me now despite us not being on great terms. I love nearly everything about my current boyfriend, but this one thing really puts me off. I want to feel like I'm worth it, and I don't like the stingyness. We're both students, but I know for a fact he has money, I've seen his house, cars and lifestyle. It's too much of a sensitive issue to touch on, I can't exactly tell him to pay for me, and not offering to is rude in my opinion. I have only ever not offered once, and on that occasion he asked me if I had a fiver on me. It might have something to do with the fact that we were already great friends before he asked me out. But I still can't understand how he can come to our FIRST date short of money. What shall I do? When the bill comes tomorrow do you suggest I say something? Advice would be greatly appreciated, thanks xXx

Hey, I need things explained My boyfriend knows I'm a virgin (and likes this fact about me) so he's said that he won't pressure me into anything etc. and he knows I'm not up for sex anytime soon. There's just one thing I don't quite understand, why does he look forward to our heavy makeout sessions so much, if he knows it wont lead to sex? Because I once read in someones post that heavy makeout sessions can be quite frustrating... Last time it was about an hour, and it was dry sex, he fingered me, and touching everywhere etc (I was too nervous about going down on him though). Does this kind of thing release a guys sexual frustration? If not, then why does he like it so much and mention looking forward to it? (He's not a virgin). I even mentioned afterwards, 'I really don't want to disappoint you', and he was like 'don't be silly'. Basically, I can't figure out this contradictory thing of making out and touching without full-on sex being frustrating, but my boyfriend looking very much forward to it. Can anyone explain this to me please? Thanks xXx

Apparently many rapists have an uncontrollable sex drives which cause them to commit the crimes they commit. I think we should take this lack of ability to realise NO means NO as a result of this, 'disorder'. However I do think it is purely inhumane and unacceptable too. Not all guys are like this I promise you, I'm sorry you had to go through this, time will heal, and you will find yourself trusting guys again when you least expect it. Good luck xxx

Hmm it's an interesting thread, for me, I was always obsessed with green and blue eyes. Everyone I used to lust after when I was 13, 14 and 15 had blue or green eyes, and I was reading my OLD diary the other day, and I it said "The guy I'm going to marry will have blue or green eyes!" My first serious relationship, what colour are his guys? BROWN! Haha I should have known such irony will occur! So yeah I guess it's true that image becomes secondary. Additionally, I find when someone is hooked on someone, if their image changes after no matter how dramatically, it doesn't matter. I once fell for a guy not long ago who ALL the girls in my college thought was extremely good-looking. 6 months down the line he gained so much weight it was uncanny. He went from fit, to just plain fat. Regardless of this I was still obsessed with him and didn't care at all. Just shows! Reminds me also of a quote (it may not be accurate): "Love is seeing an imperfect person, perfectly"

Just a question annie, when it didnt work out, did it ruin your friendship afterwards? I'm going out with a great great guy friend...I'm young though, so I'm really really that worried when we break up (although this will be a while away because our relationship is really healthy at the moment) I will have lost a good friend... I should have thought this through...lol