zb
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Ok so my new girlfriend and I are doing really well........we think we could become very serious..........the only problem is that she is only planning to stay at this college next year and then move to another college.......she also said that her plans are not certain though.............I have already finished college but I have no real plans of what to do.......my parents want to help me get a house because for around here it is much cheaper to make payments on a loan then it is to rent...... I am not sure what to do because if she and I become serious she is not going to want to stay around here even if she does decide to stay at college here...........she is a city girl and I am a country guy.............well I am not what you might think of as country.......... ...........basically I don't feel like I should settle here because if i do and she and I really do work out..........what will I do then............just sell the house............... Is there anything to the myth that city girls often fall in love with the country or a small town setting? I don't really want to be thrown into a rat race in a large city myself.......... I guess if we do grow to love each other that we will be able to take on anything.........
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Is it normal for your sex drive to go down after ending a long term relationship....... I feel nervous... might be because I have not been sleeping enough.
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I have a question.........how do you get a girl to love you in under a year. If you know that she has to go in a years time what is the best way to make sure she likes you enough to want you to come with her or to decide to stay. Do I just make sure every time with her is a good time? I really want a long term thing. I think she does as well......it is just that she has to leave after next school year that has me nervous. How long does it take your new girlfriend to fall in love with you? I do not have much exp. in the dating department. If some one is willing to date you does that mean they are willing to love you?
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Was not fickle.......I was with her for 3 years and then the 4th year she just stopped wanting to do anything. I have tried many, many times and have had many, many sleepless nights over thing........when it start effecting my health and sanity I new it was time to move on. I don't call that fickle, I call that taking care of myself.
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I just got out of a 4 year relationship... the last year or so we were engaged and it went down hill......... There was a girl I liked but I could not do anything about it because I was stuck in a relationship that I was afraid I could not get out of due to family and stuff. Any way... we really have hit it off but we can't actually start dating until next year. The good thing is that we are both picky in the partner we choose, and that we both feel that when you get in a relationship it should be something longer term, perhaps with the makings of a future marriage...... the problem is, this girl is only going to be in school for one school year...... If I am working and she is busy with school and we can't see each other that much, what do we do when the time is up. I think we will probably see each other enough.........but I know that if I am with her I will want to be with her......you know............I guess I could travel with her. Or who knows she may decide to finish school here........ what advice do you have?
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One thing that does bother me is that she is leaving next year, maybe. So if we are both looking for a long term thing, how will that happen if she is leaving... should I just ask her what she thinks about getting an apartment if we are still together by that time. It would suck to get to know someone and then have to say good bye. I mean we may not have much time due to me working and her school......but I feel we really have something if we allow it to take coarse........... She may change her mind and just want to finish school here..........who knows.
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If you have good staying power you can go a while after cumming. Yeah you should be able to build a little back up within 5 to 30 minutes on average......... I don't know what to tell you.......how old are you?
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Well I got almost all my stuff back from my ex-fiancee. The new girl and I are doing fine. She is looking for the same thing I am, a long term relationship, no games. Like me, she does not like the whole, dating for fun stuff..... you know date for a few months, and only see each other at parties... So I was glad she did not want that. She also said that I am the first guy she has went out with that actually liked her before knowing her... her past boyfriends were all friends first. She also said that I remind her of her dad, and that her goal has always been to be in a relationship that is built towards marriage.........so everything sounds good. I will have the whole summer to sort out anything I need to... I will be able to chat with her on the computer....... next year is the the year that we will actually be going out. We do consider ourselves a couple now though. Remember that my relationship with my ex-fiancee was over about year, or more ago, as a friend put it, I have been getting over her while with her. I liked this other girl but felt trapped and guilty to pursue it. I stayed with my fiancee out of fear of what my family would say. Now I am free and I am happy again. The only bad thing about the new girl is that she is only coming to school here next year and then she wants to transfer..... yet she also wants a long term type of thing. So is she saying that if we do really hit it off that I should go with her to the new town? I already graduated so I am free to travel. I really like this girl and she likes me, I would hate to see it only last a year.
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Ok, the new girl is coming over Tuesday night to finish a movie with me.......now I have already massaged her and so on......should I go for that first kiss maybe? My buddy who is our group of friends was shocked that she let me massage her because I guess she is the type to punch a guy if he touches her... which means she must really like me. She shot two guys down this semester to from what I was told. So she must be really interested.
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I just need to be careful because I may have have called the new girl and her friends a lil to much.... I just want to get to know her as much as possible in the few days of school we have left. I guess I need to just relax. I have some questions though. If I do indeed pursue this new girl would it be wise to be here towards the end of summer to meet her off the bus one she arrives back at the school from her trip.... like should I let her know in advance that I would like to... and maybe even invite her to my apartment to stay a few days before going home. Should I get her a white rose or something like that. Or maybe get her a white rose before this year is over, like the day I tell her good bye? I mean I know we want to wait until next year before actually giving us a try, but wouldn't it be good to do something nice like that before she leaves?
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First off this new girl is not really my girlfriend yet. She said she would date me next year. This summer she goes on a school trip. She wants me to have time to get over any other feelings I may have for my fiancee, which I think is really cool. The new girl "kind of" has a boyfriend that has been a long distance type of thing. She wants to break it off because it is not serious and they have not seen each other the entire year. They were best friends where she lives. I thought maybe she was just humoring by saying that she is interested but she says that she really is. We have much in common in the way that we see the world, I knew this just from observing her among our circle of friends, she said that she has observed me some too. I am not sure if anything will even start from this....... I accept that next year I may end up with no one, but I don't love my fiancee anymore so it would not be good to stay with her knowing that. I have soooooooo much love to give and we are just not similar in that respect. I am open about my feelings and she is not. This new girl might be. I talked to my parents about it and my mom has now called my fiancee mom........ they don't know what to think. My mother said it feels as if there is a death in the family if I do indeed stop the relationship... but in the relationship I have felt dead... not that I wanted to... I gave signs of life, I reached out, I cried........ and now I am numb. It is like my brain has shut off the "love her" part............. this new girl makes me smile, happy... I have not been happy all school year. The new girl did have some concerns because I am graduating and I think she was afraid I am moving away but I am not I am staying in this town... and even if I move home I am just 40 miles away. I think she may have been hurt in the past and is just afraid of getting into something that will not work. I asked her some question like what she wants out of a relationship and if she really wanted to work on a long term thing and she said yes.... we would want to build a good foundation and trust and she says she has never been unfaithful to any of her boyfriends. She has had 4 boyfriends none have been serious. She also said for me not to expect to just start having sex with her which I understand, lol. That is not what I even want... I want to get to know her... I might want to hold her. I have held her, gave her a little massage.......I am happy, so happy.......I can't help it that others do not understand. I mean does it sound good that this girl says that she is interested in starting something... I mean like she was planing to leave after the next school year but she also said that who knows she might stay.......I don't know if she is suggesting that if we really hit it off she would stay or what. I guess it is a good sign that she came over two times knowing how I feel.
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Bastard for telling my girlfriend of 4 years that it's over?
zb posted a topic in Breaking Up Advice
Well I have seen the girl that has my interest two times now...friday night and tonight.....I fell happier now then I have all year........ I just don't know how to tell my fiancee it is over, I mean she seems to have put me on the shelf for the last school...... but I still don't want her to get hurt..........the school year is over........the girl I like is going on a trip during the summer but she wants to wait until the next school year to actually date which is a good idea because it allows healing time for me...........I am so happy but, my family seems to really want me to stay with my fiancee because they think she is such a sweet girl.......I am a good son but I can't stay with someone just because my parents like them, and in time they will like the girl I am with...........am I a bastard for telling my girl friend of 4 years that it is over or is she in the wrong for leaving me to myself this last year..........I don't think I love her anymore but I still care about her well being............. -
Actually she is coming over today....or tonight. I am going to get some movies. I might ask her a few questions as well like if she even wants a long term relationship if we were able to see each other. I told her last night that I realize tht she plans to not stay at this college and town after next year but she said that "you never know I could change my mine, get attached to living here". Now is that a strong sign that she is interested in me? Also remember that this is one of those anti-social types with the to hell with them all attitude.......I am kind of like that myself.......and we have the same since of humor. There was a few times last night when the same words came out of our mouth.... heh. I actually had fun last night instead of feeling alone.
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Well I spent the night with the girl and two of her friends...we drank and had fun. ... after they left I kind of let her know how I feel........she does know that I have a fiancee... and she does have a somewhat long distance boyfriend... I told her how I have been interested in her for a while and that I think we connect and she agreed...... she said she would come over to do something Saturday. She said I should wait and see how this summer goes or at least these next few weeks and not stress over it until finals are over. I don't know what to do, my fiancee has neglected me so bad... what if I could have something really special with this girl.........we think alot the same.................but she also lives in a suburb of Chicago and I am just from a small town near the college......I don't know if I am the bad guy or not, I wait for a phone call that never happens........I always have to be the one that instigates things with my fiancee..... I should not have to do all the work... it drains me................I am not happy at all but I don't know how to tell my family that I broke the engagment and I don't know if they will like it if they hear that I am with a new girl.........the way I see it my fiancee and I were dead over a year ago...........she seems to not have as much in common with me anymore.
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Just happen to have a porno sitting out in plain view and see what she does... if your single now she will understand why you have a vid... and she might just pop it in to hint towards what she wants
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"If YOU are not happy, YOU cannot make yourself happy!" Don't you mean you can make yourself happy? Maybe that is what I am wanting is to just be happy.......I have cried way to much this year. and worried way to much at night..... Am I bad for feeling the way that I do......for wanting to know if there could be someone else who does have time for the love I can give?
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Ok as some of you know I have been having troubles with my fiancee. Well she and I talked, and I asked her if she needed space, she said she did and that alot of it has to do with her family nagging her about her major in college. I still don't see how putting me on the back burner is ok even if that is the case I wish she had talked to me about it and I did try to communicate with her on many occasion. Ok.... the girl that I am some what smitten with is going to be at a party I am going to be at tonight. Actually she is coming to my room. How do I know if she is interested in me or not. I mean I hardly know her, but I have been interested in her since the first day I saw her. If I was not engaged I would have got to know her along time ago. I feel guilty having friends that are girls but I also know that if I do indeed get dumped I would like to have some idea of who I could have something with next. I have much love that has had to be bottled up inside this last year, it has had no where to go. I have been living as if I am single, what I mean by that is lonely in my room with nothing ever to do but wait for a phone call, I have been asked by over 7 people if me and my fiancee broke up. Should I try to throw hints to this other girl that I am interested just to see what happens? If anything I would really like to be her friend because she is very interesting. I do not have much exp. with hitting on girls.... I know many of my friends do things like offer a shoulder massage or they just do it without asking. I mean is the very fact that this girl who hardly knows me is coming to my room a sign that she might be interested? And don't worry I am not going to take advantage or anything like that if she is drunk. I know many college guys do that, I am not like that.
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And remember that I am not really really sure how well this other girl likes me. She is coming over this weekend for a few drinks. How do you tell if a girl you hardly know likes you, or is the fact she is willing to come over for a few drink a sign that she at least trust you? I have watched my friends move on girls before, they often do something like offer or just starting giving the girl a massage to see what her actions are. A massage is hardly cheating. I don't know though, I just think I could make some real good friends if I do not mess it up, maybe I just have a little crush. Then again I have thought about this same girl from time to time since the first day I met her. As I began to realize that my fiancee put me on a back burner it was this girl who I sometimes thought about. I wish I had got to known her sooner but I have felt guilty making any female friends. It does not help that when I mention this girl my fiancee will call her a whore or something like that and she does not even know her. Maybe my fiancee knows that I am interested in her?
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well my fiancee is also like my best friend.....I mean like today I talked to her and we both cried a bit......but it was more like crying for a really really good friend. At the same time I love her and I would love to have children with her someday but I can't handle this back shelf treatment even if she does not mean to put me through it. I just want to get to know a few girls better so that if something does happen I can jump right back into the game. I don't want to be alone because that will just lead me to drinking.
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First off is it a question for love or just sex............don't confuse sex with love. Millions of men in America love their wives but look at porn, does that mean they do not love their wives? No, it means they are faithful to sex......... Now I do feel that the actual act of the great "in out, in out" with another woman is wrong if your married... but what is so wrong with a two adults pleasing their primitive needs in other ways. I find it strange that so many women do not mind that their men watch pornos and think about the women on them giving them fellatio or something but if the guy goes out and gets fellatio from a real woman it is all hell broke loose. And what if your the woman your married to will not do certain things that you like. say you like sucking toes but she is not into it at all, does the guy have to hide his fetish away? What about the woman who likes to be spanked but her guy will not do it.......is it really going to hurt if she meets with a guy from time to time to get spanked while she masterbate? Just somethings to think about.
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ok... so I don't know if things are getting better with me or my fiancee or not.......we been together for 4 years but this last year it has been as if I am single because she is so busy with her society and college work......but like when she says she has to study or something I will find out from her the next day that she stayed up watching tv until 4 in the morning with her female friends in her dorm... why would she tell me she does not have time to do anything because of homework and then put the homework down anyways..... plus we went from spending every day together to spending maybe 4 or so hours a week. Our sex life has went from 1 or 2 times a week to maybe 1 or 2 times a month... and she just never seems to want to actually call me up to do anything unless she needs help on homework or knows that I need help on homework...... she did call once and awhile to go shopping, now that she has a car she does not do that. We still see each other each day but it is just a little bit of chat and a kiss.....(I instigate) infact I have to instigate everything......she is rarely the one to go for a kiss........ and she can be very cold shouldered in a fight. The problem is I am realizing that now when I am with her I notice how much she nags at me. and based off the other things I feel kind of used. There is also the fact that I am kinda interested in another girl, I do not want to throw 4 years aside because I got the hots for another girl but damn it is tempting. Should I sit my fiancee down and just tell her that i am loosing interest and that I am afraid that if we don't start spending time together I may not last much longer in the relationship? She is going to be just as busy next year with her society because she has a high up position, I will be graduated.... we are suppose to get an apartment this summer but then she will be in a single room during the school year so I may not see her as much or I might see her more since she will have her own room ...........I don't know what to do.... should I at least get friendy with the girl I am kind of interested in.......I think we could be really good friends if anything....... If I got dumped right now I hardly have any friends to turn to......and hardly any prospects for future relationships.......is it wrong to prepare the field just incase I do have to go back into it again?
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You were with your girl for 6 months I have been with my for about 4 years... it a big dif I would think........that is why it is really hard to know what to do. I have talked to her some and I think that it is just an issue of time......but the question is ....is it ok for her to hold so many things over time she could spend with me........even if a little time............It would be nice to know if the girl I am interested in even knows that I am, and what she thinks... Hell that might help me make up my mind......tired of being single in a relationship..... that is about what it is like right now.
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I just say don't worry about it sola... I have been giving this some thought and really lets say in my case that I did decide to call it off... I mean cause every time I am with my fiancee anymore I leave feeling like crap......she is really naggy/jumpy lately...of coarse I know she has had to endure my rought times... so I am sticking with it... but at the same time I know a few girls around me that if I was single I could probably start something with them. You would be surprised what a few smiles and few talks can do, especially if a rose happens to be found by the girl and she has no idea who it came from (though be warned that some girls get scared by that, I knew a guy last year who freaked a girl out by sending her flower out of the blue)........ and I think with time anyone can be the ONE as long as you both are interested in each other.... I was really crushed at the thought of loosing my fiancee but now I am starting to feel better about the situation if it did happen... it would hurt, and I don't know if I could just jump back into the dating game... but then I was never in the dating game.... by the way which flowers mean friendship...white roses?
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well it depends on what the fight was over................anyway with me.......we did not decide to give each other space it just kind of happened.... we went from seeing each other and being with each other about 4 to 5 hours a day to about 2 hours or so ever 2 days...........I think not being with her as much has kind of caused me to drift .......my feelings may not be as strong as they were.........of coarse in my case it was this whole year...........due to her being busy with college groups and such. one week should not hurt you....but hey it might give either of you the chance to have the eye wander as well....
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see I never undertood the "there is always the ONE out there for you" thing... I have only been with one woman, we will most likely get married in a year or so... though the relationship has got knocked around some this year due to neglect........If she did dump me, or if I dumped her I just don't see how I could find the ONE, when she was the ONE ...the only one... that has gave me a chance. I hope I get over the feelings I have been having... I have had to be alone so much this year that my eyes have started to look at other women that I find attractive, or at least share some of my interest......it was not like I meant for it to happen.......but how could any of them be the ONE...........you see I just do not understand it.... can anyone be the ONE if you spend enough time with them or something?