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So I'm sure we all know the importance of taking birth control pills properly... but what happens when you physically lose one? I dropped one of mine someplace that I absolutely cannot find it, just to cut to the chase. I searched high and low. I took the next day's pill immediately-- which is the same color (and I'm guessing, the same potency because it says something like 30/30 on it) So now I'm a pill short, but I've got another pack. So I'll take one from that. But since it's not something like pain killers, or something like that, I should be able to get another pack, right? Hopefully? I'm REALLY curious and I can't get in touch with my doctor until maybe tomorrow and I'm dying to know-- I don't want to have to deal with next month and being short and worrying if it throws me out of whack and getting me pregnant. Martha

Thanks, I'm definitely going to pick up a copy. Hopefully it's still out as it's August's issue. Thank you!

He didn't just flat out say that, as it's a family matter and it called for the 4 people in his family, I'm sure he could do something but I don't know that. He just brings me everywhere with him now anyway so I don't know why he complains about how I always have to come if he answers "why wouldn't you be coming." That family thing I don't really care about.. but it would be nice to be invited. I guess 7 years together isn't family enough, but it was more of his relatives anyway, and they don't really know me. He could bring me because it's not like against the law or anything but he was just aggravated. I'm sick of him being aggravated.

I'm so afraid because I feel like the time is running out because he's telling me it's over and that he's done and he can't take it anymore that I aggravate him so much. I feel like he wouldn't be saying that if it weren't or me saying it-- I used to always say something about breaking up if he or I was aggravated, and I feel like that's another thing I got him into feeling. I only say that because he's never out of these 7 years together talked about breaking up until now in these past several months when I've thrown it around out of frustration. I'm so hurt that I supposedly aggravate him as much as I do, and that he had more fun with his sibling and their s.o. some night ago, than he does with me... and that he supposedly never does have fun with me-- that, I don't get. Then there's this family event which was all planned out (like a wedding, but it's not a wedding-- just an example) and I'm not invited. But I think he said something about probably being able to do something to bring me, but that he doesn't want me there and doesn't know why I have to be at everything. He doesn't even want to go and it's just a family thing that I'm not even crazy about, but I'd still like to go... just the fact he doesn't even want me there regardless hurts me. I aggravate him-- I don't know what I do. I hope it's like that Annie : ( I think it kind of is because even I have said things I don't mean out of frustration, but he's saying things like break up and I don't know how to handle if he's serious or just frustrated in the moment...

He says it out of frustration and says he doesn't mean it. I think he started saying it because I told him he doesn't like me just when I used to get aggravated over something. And then one day it just started. He says he obviously cares but I am so hurt that he actually told me he never has fun with me, somehow. I don't get it. I don't know what he wants-- I thought he was happy but he always gets sick of me for whatever reason. I don't know what action to take- I don't know what his deal is. He says I call him too much and I know that starts it up, but I only call a lot because he hangs up on me all the time before I'm done talking because he hates the phone. Not in the middle of me talking, but he just cuts the conversation short. It's better than before when we'd not talk for days on the phone, and at least now we talk several times a day. I know he hates the phone and I've always known it but I feel terrible inside when he hangs up so I call back. That makes him frustrated. And then I don't know what's up with not having fun with me... I always thought we had fun, but I guess he doesn't enjoy anything with me; I have no idea what he really means. I feel like he says things he doesn't fully mean.

He tells me that when he's aggravated, and he seems aggravated over the phone. It's always over the phone for the most part. He supposedly is held back from having a life but he never tells me something's coming up and NOW he's just always bringing me with him. So I have kind of been under the impression he's fine with how everything is. And I've been under the impression that us out laughing and having fun together every weekend was fun but he says he never has fun with me and that I just aggravate him. He just doesn't care; he doesn't like me. He can't stand me anymore. I annoy him, and I'm all these horrible things. He makes it seem like we see eachother every day when in reality we see eachother for like 7 or 8 hours over the weekend. I don't get it and I have no idea what to do. He can't stand me.

It's funny how every time I think to myself, wow I haven't had to post on eNotalone for a while, all of a sudden something nasty in my relationship happens. I don't truly feel like we're falling apart, because we get on so well and there's so many improvements that we're riding on. I feel like it's a case of the things that have been dragging on through right along with the improvements that are ruining things. I don't know where to begin. It just feels like there's so many little details, but this huge part inside of me is saying that he doesn't realize how minor these things are. I supposedly annoy him, he claims he can't stand me but it's always when he's aggravated. He has so much fun without me I think. I don't know how much he cares, but I can guess how little. I feel really confused and overloaded. I go crying to him, which I know makes it easy for someone to not care-- to keep running to them the way I've been, crying, oh I love you, even though it's not even necessary to say it or cry or any of that. I'm leaving a lot out and I might sound really vague but the problem is I just don't know where to start. I think I'm making it hard to get help but I don't know where to start. Everything has details to it. Martha

Why play you? Because you're not even 18 yet and he's 25. This isn't even worth any of what you're going through-- not at all. It's just going to get worse. Forget him, as much as you've fallen for him, forget him. Just forget him. And did he do something sexual with someone else-- is that what you said? And you had sex and didn't use protection?? If that's the case, you might want to go get yourself tested. There's a lot of questions, but seriously, not worth your time, not worth your consideration, not worth our feelings... You're so much better than this.

That's true... but they are so mad about it, or at least my manager is. Everyone else seems pretty typical but I'm sure she wasted no time complaining to everyone about me. It turned into a long story... It did hurt the schedule, and I thought about it at first and didn't know we were scheduled short for this week. Now if I'm ever sick again I have nooo idea what I'm going to do, aggh..

Yeah I don't even think I used the right words.. because I got a call back and they were like "you can call out when you're sick, but not if you're TIRED." I'm like well "I have a cold too, I'm not going to list my symptoms." I have a cold, I'm sick to my stomach, I have the chills, I'm exhausted.. I just got back. I didn't say all that, but I wish I used better words. They hung up on me and said they'd call another place for help (to get someone to fill a spot for the day) And did just that, hung up, slammed the phone?? I don't know if this means I'm going to get fired or what but now I DEFINITELY can't sleep, and I feel like crap and discombobulated. I wish I said I'm sick and I'm throwing up. I sure feel like throwing up... I can't even sleep which is what I really needed to do =\

I got back from a trip and I'm so out of it from the time change, but more from the "new bedtime." I caught a bit of a cold too but that's not really the problem. I'm just SO out of it that I had to call out. So they got mad, didn't yell but I know they're so mad.. I don't know how true they needed my help as they said but I really need to get some rest and I can't because I'm so upset and embarrassed. I feel like if I could force myself to go, I could, sure. But I'm so tired and weak and out of it, and so uncomfortable from the cold I got which just tops it off. I keep thinking of what I told them, I'm like "you know what I just got back from mine and I'm so this blah blah..." didn't mention the cold though just because I felt weird listing my symptoms. I don't know but I need to get to sleep and I'm so upset, embarrassed and I feel like a horrible person! I can't stop tossing and turning and thinking about it. All I really want to hear is yeah it happens. Then I'll feel better, honestly. I don't want the evil eye tomorrow at work but I just really need some sleep. I'm not even a person who calls out (though I'm still new) But even so, I don't call out unless I really need to, and I haven't yet at this job.. but I feel so stupid. Martha

I don't seem to have much of a problem making friends or calling up most other girls, but lately I've been meeting some of the girlfriends of my boyfriend's friends and exchanging numbers and I feel so so shy. I don't know why it is. And I just feel weird, I think especially because I don't work with them or go to college with them, and have only hung out with them in the group once or twice. I don't want to never call people I get on really good with either, plus it's weird like I'd be ignoring them or blowing them off and I don't want to do that. Like I don't even know what to say. It's because I don't really *know* them, I've just hung with them with a group once or twice.. so I feel like a weirdo calling them like I've known them forever, know what I mean? What do you do-- what do you say to not make it seem weird like "hey I'm calling you like I know you but really have only known you from one time..." That kind of thing. Martha

Sorry I hadn't read it; I didn't know I got 2 new replies and just went to read the one right after yours thinking I'd just gotten that one new one. I don't think I need medication; maybe I did before but not now. It's only been a couple of weeks but just being out with my boyfriend more in different and new situations has really helped all on it's own. I feel like I finally don't care as much and I don't get as worried because I finally see the proof there's nothing to worry about or feel missed out on. I don't know if I'll go back to feeling this way, but it's not that constant feeling it went back to any longer as of now. I like this feeling, just not caring as much and just not worrying so much, but I think I have it in me still. I'll see where it goes again.

We've grown apart because...? Because we've been together so long? What a misconception. I know some people grow apart and don't grow as individuals, but to say that right off the bat like it's a fact of couples who've been together at a young age for many years isn't right. And how has friends and my goals been stunted..??? Where does this come from? What a misconception. I didn't know I wasn't really in college pursuing my dream career, and that he didn't go through school already and is at the start of his career. Or that I'm not a completely different person from high school, or from even just a year ago. Or that the friends we've made individually or grew up from never existed. We've always been individuals and if anything I've always wanted us to be closer and intertwined more, but then that's where we'd have grown apart or not had any experiences at all. Just because we've been together so long doesn't mean we never do anything outside or that we don't pursue anything. I'm pissed though because I think we should be living together by now but legitimate reasons prevent that, like me being in college and no money, and him at the start of his career, getting everything together.

Thanks so much. I picked up a book of apartments in my state and surrounding states, and I don't think it will work. I kind of knew it wouldn't but now I know for sure. During school I'm only making 500-600 dollars a month, and 200-300 dollars of that is going towards car insurance and a loan I have to pay now all each month... and splitting with roommates would cost too much for me still. Living on campus is really the best solution but I'd be spending even more than anything else, and being crammed with 4-5 other people that I know I won't like. I'm at an art college, and though the people are nice, they're just so... floofy it would drive me nuts to *live* with them haha. So that just kind of tops it off; who knows if I'd be driven just as crazy or not. It feels like these situations are "I could but I can't" kind of things, or "I could but I won't," and I hate to admit it. The hole at home keeps getting deeper and deeper though, that's for sure.

I NEEEEEED to move out, I NEEED to, I don't know how it's going to work, but I HAVE to get the hell out of here. I don't know if I'll be more miserable because I'll be struggling terribly.. come to think of it, I don't even know if I can afford it in the first place. I don't even know where to begin. I'm sick of everything. I hate my life, I'd rather be dead than this miserable living at home. I hate this so much. A few more years, maybe 4 more, is going to be a waste by dealing with it. I can't live on campus because that's actually more expensive and is more for location to the college than anything else. I feel so stupid saying all of this but I don't know where to turn. I feel like some troubled teenager but I'm not-- not in the least. I'm so so miserable. I know people have it worse just from things I hear around, and I don't know how they deal with it... I have no idea. I can't stand the things going on at home with my family--- I mean, just as an example, and not even the "best" one I have, I have to worry about my things when I leave. I just left to grab a coffee, not even 10 minutes, and I come home and crap is PIILED in my room. PILED. Like anything my mother could find of mine in those 10 minutes, she piled in my room. You'd think it's things that should be in there, and it's far from it! That's not even it; it's worse-- that was just the last straw and what finally set me off again. It's all too much to get into. I'm sorry I have no clue who to go to about this. I know what it sounds like; I'm not troubled youth. What do you do; I can't suck it up any longer, it's such a waste. I'm just miserable... wasting my life away-- I don't know what else to say. Sorry if you think I'm silly from this. You can think I am.. I know it probably sounds stupid. It's actually embarrassing to get into because I feel like I'm too old to be having this problem. I'm the broke college student living at home. I work, have saved a good amount of money, but when I go back... I'm not even getting home until 6-9pm at night most nights and I'll be working weekends. No cash flow... feels like no way out. Martha

Makeup isn't what's going to make it worse-- in 9 out of 10 cases, that's what the solution is. Some people just naturally have skin tone such as yours, and if they want to deal with it, they use makeup. More people wear makeup than you probably realize. But enough about makeup; you could see a dermatologist, and no I don't know everything, but I'm just not sure what they could do for you, such as if that's just the color of your skin in those areas. But I'd definitely try it out, maybe there's something they can do for you.

One person is new-ish, and younger than me. The others aren't too much older than me though; late 20's, mid 30's, maybe 40-50 for another couple. I don't want to quit, but I'm just getting sick of it. I feel it will be okay once they get a feel for me being 110% after I've really learned all there is... I'm trying my best to do that now, but then there's these little mistakes. And they're these things we can just fix right away with a few buttons! And I even just went for it and asked, just to get it out there, am I the only one who's new that's made these same mistakes? And they said no, but one of the managers didn't seem to think it mattered, but I mean, just to say hey you don't know yet if this is "me." I just really fear for my job... a lot. It's not my career but it's something I'll be with for the next couple of years, just for the rest of college. But I wanted to see how it went as well. Thank you sooo much for responses-- I feel better knowing people understand. It is true, very serious, but they make me feel like I'm this horrible failure. It's only helpful to make me take better precautions about things-- anything at all, but that's all it's really doing for me. Other than that it's just a lousy feeling.

It's my first job ever working for a bank. I feel I do a good job and I've been congratulated for doing really well by a few people. We're a small group, but there's also "big" visitors too who are also employees of the bank. Lately, I'm under the impression that I am NOT trusted. All those comments feel like they've been taken back completely. I can understand being new (for nearing 2 months now) and all of that, but I'm constantly being checked up on and have made a few minor mistakes that have been easily fixed. They don't believe that my cash is balancing with the system. Today I was off during a trial balance in the middle of the day, and by the end it was balanced-- obviously a miscount. One of the managers exclaimed that I "supposedly" and "apparently" balanced. And is always so surprised that I have balanced. Even by little things the other employees say, like asking me 3 times if my cash is put away by the end of the day, yes it is, it is, yes. And also being surprised I've balanced-- people who have been away on vacation and things like that who really haven't even gotten to know me yet, and honestly it just seems I've been talked about in that way to them. Other things are verifying things I've never done wrong. Singling me out, not that I care about that anyway (not being anti-social, but just I really don't care anyway in this case) but it's that feeling, not a ridiculous feeling-- I KNOW. I KNOW they don't trust me. I just don't feel it's because I'm new... I just know it's an issue of trust, especially getting this late in the game. It's created this problem where I'm afraid of getting fired if they no longer 'need me,' and things like that. I feel like if anyone's got to go, it will be me. And I REALLY need this job. They're like looking up my balancing reports and things like that... and just being weird with me. And no, just in case anyone wants to ask, NO I'd never steal or do anything like that. I'm just a regular girl; I wear nice clothes and I like to be well kept-- I'm pretty typical, I guess. And I'm not weird or anything. Just wondering if anyone's gone through this, either working at a bank, or someplace else. It's just --- can't even describe it. It makes me feel really bad, and scared for my job over something I've not even done wrong. I've thought of the possibility of wrongfully accusing them (not that I have towards them) but honestly, I think it's really for real. Martha

The bottom line is that you don't owe her anything; especially after things like that. I didn't even know it was like that when I originally responded, and that description is pretty bad. It's not about being a nice guy-- don't be a tool, don't call her. You know, as hard as that is to say, don't be a tool. You don't owe her anything, but even moreso, you've come this far with no contact. It's JUST her birthday; try to think of it as literal as it is.

Well, no contact is no contact. Breaking it to say happy birthday would be like breaking it for any other reason, which would defeat the purpose.

My boyfriend just says hello, and so do I. If it's a call at an odd hour, we'll both answer differently, like hey!!, but really don't feel bad your boyfriend says hello in no particular way-- the rest of the conversation counts, too. Even though the greeting may seem like a first impression to you as to how he's feeling about receiving your call, always remember it's the conversation in general that matters most. It's cute to get other things said to you, for sure. I think if you were to drop him little sayings, like heeey be excited to hear from me (in a completely non-nagging way), or something like that, maybe you'll start hearing him answer differently from time to time. If you're going to do that though, do it far in between because if it's all the time he may become too aware of it and be like no what's the point-- he may feel forced, know what I mean?

That's a good idea! I never thought about dance... I think I'm going to look into that. That would be fun, especially bellydancing!

It's terrible! I really want to go out and have fun and things like that. I can see why MS would help, but I was on that before about a year ago, and I don't like not knowing who is looking at my page, or who knows I had one on top of other things I don't like about it. Regardless of being able to set to private and all that. I think it really is a good idea because I know it would probably help connect me to people in my town (my current friends all are from college, and are all in different towns/cities) but I'm just really not into it. I don't know what organization I could get into, but I think it's time I did that, with really looking into some things. I'm not sure what to do at all but something has to get me around more girls. I was thinking maybe a course someplace outside of my college or something like that. Thanks so much for your suggestions Annie.

I don't think it's bad that you told him that, especially because he asked you, but also because it's your opinion. He'll decide whatever he decides anyways, whether people are all telling him yeah go get one, or if everyone's telling him no that's a bad idea. If he's going to get one though, and he's surely made up his mind, help him to pick something that actually means something and isn't just this generic thing. And that it's not just for the sake of getting one, and all that.