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nicholascrack

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Everything posted by nicholascrack

  1. nicholascrack
    Wow. It has been a long time since I've been on here. If anyone remembers what happened, I got into a lot of trouble with the law and ended up losing my girlfriend of 3.5 years because of some poor decisions. Anyways, the charges were miraculously dropped in March. I was facing THREE YEARS but for some reason the case was thrown out before it even went to trial. I am continuously humbled by those events. My ex has moved on and so have I. What was so difficult at the time is now easily manageable. I thought I had lost everything. When you are 22 and facing three years in jail, your girlfriend (almost fiance) leaves you, your life seems hopeless. I even considered suicide and checked myself into the hospital one night when it got too much to handle. Thank God I didn't do anything stupid. It just goes to show that there is life after the ex. What seems impossible is not really that impossible at all. Hopefully I can share my experiences with everyone here. A lot of people were very supportive and so it is my turn to do the same. Thank you! Nicholas
  2. nicholascrack
    I didn't know dialated pupils is a sign of attraction. That's really interesting. I had always associated it with some form of narcotics use. Just kidding. Keep us updated, sounds like a nice guy. It sounded like he was trying to spend as much time with you as he could, by his "fifteen more minutes," remark.
  3. nicholascrack
    Hey, Well, she called me today and said she wasn't ready for a relationship. She apologized and said I was a great guy, yadda yadda yadda. Finally. A girl with balls. I respected the fact that she called me and told me that, instead of the juvenile not-picking-up-the-phone crap. I thought it was a classy move and I told her so. She was a great girl, but these things happen. Kalshane, What's going on playa? It know it does sound weird wanting to settle down at my age. But for the past four years, I've lived a very, very fast lifestyle. For a while, it was almost a different girl every night. Personally, I was getting tired of it and I wanted to slow down. I just hate having to go back to square one. It's really frustrating after you've invested time and money into someone. I guess it's back to the library and church to start waxin and milkin' again...haha Nicholas
  4. nicholascrack
    Hey stargazer, Getting back in the loop after a long break eh? I can testify to that. Sounds like everything went splendid. From his actions, it seems like he is interested in you. The apologetic e-mail was a good sign I think. I don't really know what else to say, looks like everything went well and to just continue on from there. You noticed his pupils were dialated the whole time? LOL Nicholas
  5. nicholascrack
    Kalshane, You are right. Quantity is very important too. It's always a big boost to a guy's ego to get ten numbers in one night at the club. I guess with the current mindframe I have right now, I'm kind of looking towards something that will last. I hate wasting time with wastes of time, which has been happening a lot lately. But in order to get yourself out there, quantity is totally important. It's kind of a balance. Nicholas
  6. nicholascrack
    Hey man, Finding a good-quality chick is hard. I'm straight up going to start scouring the library and church at this point. Night-clubs. Well, the girls are hot and everyone's in their element, but what's missing is the quality. You go out a couple of times and then nothing happens. You met at a bar. Entre-nous, I'd prefer it if I met a girl outside of the bar. Girls that go to bars every weekend will cause you headaches. I agree with ticklebug. To young guys like you and I it might seem impractical to go meet a girl while volunteering or going for coffee. But the type of girl you will meet there will be high-class and have a good heart. I stay away from bartenders and waitresses. They get hit on a million times a day and that can get ridiculous for a guy. A sporting event would be a great place to meet a girl, I think. How cool would it be to hang out with a girl that knows more about basketball than you? Church is good, but, we all know how that is... I'm kind of dating a girl now who is what I'd call a "bar-star." I'm practically younger than she is and I'm just tired of that scene. Prowling is lots of fun, with the guys and everything, but it rarely leads to anything very substantial. Whatever you do, look for quality. Be confident. You'll do allright! Nicholas
  7. nicholascrack
    Yo surething, I'm guessing you're maybe in high school? Hmm...that was a blur in my life, but I'll give it my best shot. It's just going to be you and you won't know anyone. You will be left out, because a lot of the music isn't going to be slow. That means you HAVE to dance. You don't want to be looked upon as lame. We all hate dancing, but we have to do it. Otherwise, some smooth-talking hustler with moves like Usher is going to snatch her up while you're standing on the side, waiting for K-Ci and Jo Jo to come on. Show her that you're confident with yourself and dance with her. Start off by giving her some space when you dance. Don't go for the bump and grind right off the start. She'll introduce you to some friends, that will be cool. Since this is the first time the two of you are going out, I would just act laid-back and confident. Um, don't bring flowers. See how the dance goes and then decide whether a kiss is in order. Don't worry about the parents, just act genuine and look the Dad in the eye. And smile too. Good luck. Let yourself go and have some fun. Nicholas
  8. nicholascrack
    Hey kalshane, Well, I called her and we talked for about ten minutes. We hang out about twice a week, call each other every day. I make myself pretty available, which is what I think might kill it. How do I kind of make sure she doesn't loose interest in me? I'm a good guy, drive a nice car, good-looking, funny. We just lead busy lives. What are some strategies I can use to really reel her in? I am the man at picking up chicks and having a really good first date. But I'm not a finisher. I need to work on that aspect now that I'm trying to settle down a bit.
  9. nicholascrack
    Hey all, So I'd been seeing this new girl for about three-four weeks. We'd been having a lot of fun together, going to concerts, restaurants etc. As far as I knew, we were getting along just great. But her behavior over the last couple of days has been peculier. On Thursday after work, I called and she said, "Can I call you right back?" But she never did. As well, Friday she didn't pick up my calls. Now I HATE not knowing what's going on. So how do I find out without looking like a psycho weirdo. I don't want to keep on calling like I'm desperate... Thanks gang Nicholas P.S. Sorry if it looks as if I'm overreacting. I'm feel like I'm overreacting. Maybe she's just busy. She's just the first girl in months that didn't make me think about my ex, it would be a real shame if it fizzled out like this...
  10. nicholascrack
    Strandysmommy, Wow. I respect the honesty of your post. Sometimes when someone has hurt you so bad, you don't want to give them the benefit of your thoughts and cares. You mention that you would always go downstairs and snuggle with him. It sounds as if you had a lot of broken dreams as a result of his actions, whatever they are. The fact is, sadly, some guys just aren't ready for relationships. That is hardly your fault at all. It still sounds like you really hurt inside, deep down. Even though he might have done something really wrong and hurtful, it sounds like he still has a chunk of your heart. I don't really know what to say. I know my birthday is coming up and I'm kind of just like your ex. It would be nice to hear from her (and likewise, from you), but it's not something I expect. I understand the pain she (and likewise, you) are going through, and I don't expect her (you) to act like we're still, "buddies." I say continue on the path to healing. You don't have to reach out to him if you don't think it's fair. I, and hopefully he, would respect that. Hope that was of some help. Sincerely, Nicholas
  11. nicholascrack
    Hey honeybunch, Yeah, I respect her reply. She kind of put things gently so I didn't have to go through all the trouble, and end up looking like an idiot. Oddly enough, I did anyways. What I said was kind of stupid, kind of playing it off as a joke. We kind of stay our distance from one another. So the friend thing is not really there. I guess its hard maybe for a girl to be friends with a guy who is attracted to her. I admit I am clueless. I'm 21 and have dated 2 girls for the past seven years, 3.5 yeas each! I'm pretty new at this whole thing. Just glad to be out there Nicholas
  12. nicholascrack
    Hey Ated, I'm sorry to hear that you were feeling sad today. Life is constantly up and down. Seeing your ex with another person can be almost traumatic sometimes. I know I literally snapped when I saw that, something inside my head just went off and I haven't really been the same since. But I've learned not to take those sort of events personally. He doesn't mean to hurt you. He doesn't mean to break your heart. Maybe it's just something he has to do, and in time, things will even themselves out. It's not easy. As far as desensitization goes, I don't know what to say. I have never been able to do it. Sometimes I wish I could. Surround yourself with friends, stay busy, pick up a hobby. April is not that far away. You still need lots of time to heal, so take it. It's yours! Ated, sometimes its hard. Sometimes it feels impossible. But you are going to make it! You're going to be bruised and battered, but you will be stronger! Keep me updated! Nicholas
  13. nicholascrack
    Hey Ated, Basically, my ex and I broke up in May. So it took a really long time. But it's almost as if the shackles have been broken. I didn't want to rub it in my ex-girlfriend's face that I've found someone new, but I'm pretty sure she knows what's going on. I don't want her to be sad. But I guess it comes down to listening to her own advice: "If it's meant to be, it'll be." I was miserable while she was out with other guys. This is the one chance I have to be happy again and I'm going to take it. The little games are still going on. It's kind of ridiculous. I happened to check her profile today. Under favorite things it used to read, "Driving in Nicholas' Benz." Now it reads something like "Driving with my hotel roomies," or something like that. I kind of take that as an obvious attempt to get at me. But if I were to reply in kind, it would be childish and it would give the idea that I'm not happy and that sort of thing still bothers me. Exes are not exactly innocent of the mind-games. I encourage all of you to watch out. When you are being exploited and manipulated, take off and go the other direction! There's no sense getting hurt. Take care everyone, and please, move forward to become happy, with or without your ex. Nicholas
  14. nicholascrack
    Hey everyone, Although I have not gotten back together with my ex, I am so happy at this point in my life. You see, I was hanging on this thread, this bone that she threw me, where she would say, "If it's meant to be, it'll be." Meanwhile, she wanted to go on dates with all these guys while I sat there and waited like an idiot. But it's not happening like that anymore. Sooner or later, we have to look at the situation and say, "This is ridiculous. This is ruining my pride and my self-esteem. I have to get out of here." And we have to let go of the only love we've ever known. For the past several weeks, I've been seeing this girl. She is amazing. Gorgeous, smart, funny, caring. For the first time in many months, I wasn't stuck thinking about my ex. It has taken me a long time to get here, but I'm glad I'm here. Have I moved on completely? I don't really know. But I'm not going to wallow in self-pity and sadness. It's a new day; I feel a connection with this girl already. It's not for everyone. But I know it has helped me tremendously. I don't have to sit at home and wonder who my ex is out at the club with. I don't have to worry about her getting intimate with someone else. That's not in my control. But my own happiness IS in my control. Thanks Nicholas
  15. nicholascrack
    Lostangel, If he's going out every night that means he is miserable. Skynet is exactly right. He's probably miserable as hell. Stay strong and resist the urge to call! You were doing so well and you sounded like you were being very productive. If he calls, I'd MAYBE pick up, but say, "Oh, I'm on the way to the gym," or "I'm in the middle of a run." Keep conversations BRIEF. Less than a minute. Lostangel, you feel down now, but I hope you will feel happy again soon. The past six months sound so tough, but I know, and everyone else knows, that you can do it. JUST STAY STRONG. If you feel like you're going to crack, come on here. We're here for you. I know what you're feeling, the exact same thing happened to me. Stay up and smile. Nicholas
  16. nicholascrack
    Learningprocess, You gave some really good advice to a lot of people. The only advice I can give you is play it cool. Asking someone to marry that you just broke up with is not something you should do. That is the last thing you want to do. That will freak this girl out. That will push her even further away than she is now. I don't know what it is like to be turned down in a proposal like that. I don't ever want to know. You want to ask that question when you're sure of the answer. And right now it sounds like it is up in there. Give her some time, give yourself some time. Keep your distance. I was in a similar situation, and when I didn't contact my ex, she went crazy and called me ten times a day. She worried so much about me. I know this because she told me! It sounds like you had a good relationship. It sounds like it was a good house. If you trust the foundation, than you have nothing else to worry about. Take care man, Nicholas
  17. nicholascrack
    Dood, If she's making accusations like that, you HAVE to stay as far away as possible from her. I know you want to defend yourself and your reputation, but don't have anything to do with her. Don't even call her on Thanksgiving. Not hearing from you will shake her up. Play it safe, man. You don't want to get in any sort of domestic trouble. Because the man can never lose that fight. That's just the way it is. You don't want to be accused of anything you haven't done. Stay up playa, Nicholas
  18. nicholascrack
    Yeah, what is up with her reply? I should have written back: "Your assumption that I wanted to date you was charming. I would love to get together with you for some more self-flattery in the future..." In all honesty, she probably doesn't even know who I am. In my experience, EVERYONE has a special guy of two years until they see you drive a Mercedes... Nicholas P.S. Forgive the arrogance, but I've got all this new-found confidence and there's nothing I can do to keep it under control, no matter how unattractive it is...sigh...
  19. nicholascrack
    Dude, Hey man. It's Nicholas. I know it is really hard to hear the words our exes use sometimes. "I would kill myself before I ever got back together with you..." What exactly is that? It sounds like you're doing a lot better. There was some good, solid advice from SuperDave and Learning. GOOD, SOLID ADVICE. And I would read and apply it all. "Expect the worse, hope for the best." Very good words of advice. Leave her alone for a while and then she will find what she is missing. I'm hearing the same thing from my ex, "If it was meant to be, it'll be." Pfff. What is that crap? The only thing that'll BE is me, leaving. Don't take that. You sound like a cool guy, you have success with women. Go out there and have a little fun. You can do it, playa Nicholas
  20. nicholascrack
    Hi Lostangel, I can really sympathize with you. You're going through no contact, you're staying so strong, not calling your ex and then......BAM...they contact you. And immediately the gates burst and you let all your emotions and questions out. I know this may seem like a setback, but I don't think that you're really even ready to talk to him just yet. I think you need to continue doing what you've been doing. If he calls, I say don't pick up. I know it's not nice, but these conversations always leave us emotional wrecks. Angel, I hope you get back on your feet. You sound really sweet, and, quite frankly, you can't blame yourself for how you reacted when he called. You had all these questions you were dying to ask... Hope I was of some help Nicholas
  21. nicholascrack
    Muneca, Don't worry! I didn't actually send it!! LOL! I'm just going to go to class and look like I'm the man, exuding confidence and pride. I have to play piano for this presentation, so I'm busting out this crazy excerpt from the Liszt piano sonata. It's going to be NUTS!! I'm going to be the man. What my fingers can do on the piano will make her forget what my fingers did on the keyboard. (That was gold, Nicholas. A solid use of parallelism) DBL is right. I doubt I will get a response, but on the one hand, I wasn't really looking for a response. I wanted to make it look like her having a boyfriend didn't affect me (which it really didn't, honestly). So it was actually my intention of playing it off as a joke or a mistake. She probably doesn't even know who I am. I wanted it to be on good terms, because I'm probably going to be seeing this girl for another three and a half years! But I'll tell you one thing, she'll know who I am after I play the Liszt sonata! KABAAAMM!!!!
  22. nicholascrack
    DBL, I took your advice and wrote her a follow up e-mail: Dear _______, Please disregard the earlier message. I am a retard and I seem to have lost my balls and common sense. Sorry. Nicholas ______________________________________________________ Let me know what you think Nicholas
  23. nicholascrack
    Damn. Yeah, I don't know what I was thinking sending that. I thought I would just kinda freestyle it, you know? The more I read my message, the more retarded it sounds. I've obviously ditched any hope I had of dating her a long time ago, I was just trying to come off looking cool about the whole thing. You're right, now it looks like a joke and that I need a life. Sigh...where did my balls and common sense end up?
  24. nicholascrack
    Hey everyone, That was some really good advice. I kind of borrowed from Skynet a bit and took his approach, throwing in a bit of a joke. I wanted to make it clear that I was still the man and could laugh at myself. Hey _______, It was great to hear back from you. There's kind of a funny story about that message. I had been telling one of my buddies about this girl in my class and that I didn't really want to go up and talk to her. He said to just e-mail her on blackboard. Well, when I told him I had e-mailed you, he burst out laughing. He said he was just joking and didn't think I would actually do it. Haha. The guys still have a good laugh about that one. Anyways, thanks for being friendly about it. I was quite embarrassed about the whole thing, myself. Your boyfriend is a lucky guy. Hope to chat sometime. Nicholas __________________________________________________________ I should have stuck to DBL's plan to and thrown in something like, "If this guy is so "special", why doesn't he drive a Mercedes-Benz?" haha... I hope that response was okay. What did you guys think? Nicholas
  25. nicholascrack
    Okay, There was this really hot girl in one of my classes. She was always hanging out around a bunch of weirdos, and I could never approach her, so I decided to write her an e-mail: Hey _____, First of all, I hope this doesn't sound too weird. My name is Nicholas, I'm in your Fine Arts 201 Class. I'm the kinda tall guy that was wearing the navy blue jacket and dark blue jeans last Thursday. Anyways, I always wanted to introduce myself to you but never quite had the chance. If you're ever on MSN, my contact thing is _________ Hopefully we can chat some time. Sincerely, Nicholas _________________ This is her reply: Hey Nicholas, You'll have to identify yourself to me sometime, it always nice to get to know people in your classes. However, I have to let you know that I have been dating a special guy for the last two years. It was nice to receive your message! __________ ______________________________________________________ A very, nice gracious reply. Now I'm not sure what to write back. I want to save my pride, but accept my losses and not try to sound like a jack#*$. Any help would be appreciated. I wouldn't mind just being friends with this girl, she sounds really nice. Nicholas
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