GimmeASpork

You're not fat. You're a tall 11 year old. A girl who's 5'4" and weighs 112lbs. is a bit on the slim side I'd say. You shouldn't worry so much about your weight. If you're comparing yourself to your friends, don't because chances are you're taller than they are and that's why you weigh more. It takes a good amount of bone and muscle structure to build every inch of height, so don't think about losing any weight.

Hey Abby, No, I wouldn't show up unanounced at his place. He might feel really pressured and it might make it worse. I just want to know, how come you're so intersted in having contact with him? Maybe he doesn't feel comfortable with your attentions knowing you're married. If all you want is friendship, then I suggest you and your husband invite him to your house for a bbq or something and encourage him to bring a friend and let him know you're inviting other people too. That way it won't look like you just want to get some time with him alone.

It sounds like you've realized that you don't deserve to be mistreated. It's his problem that he can't deal with the relationship he had with you. You've made a big step in being able to leave all that behind you and move forward. I'm very glad for you.

As far as I know, unpaid internships are legal. They're considered an educational benefit for you. I don't know if there are special cases. You ALWAYS have the right to report harassment. It doesn't matter whether you're being paid or not. It's just part of feeling safe in the workplace. Talk to someone in human resources and complain about the harassment. Then keep notes on when it happens (dates, times), what is said, who said it and who was around to hear it. It'll come in handy in case the harasser wants to deny it. Nobody should feel threatened at work (or any place for that matter). You have the right to report them. Good Luck!

Hey Nightbringer, Viagra also lowers blood pressure so make sure yours is normal and not on the low side cuz you could have problems if it gets too low.

Hey sprkal, I just want to mention also that I hope I didn't sound like I was saying that being a virgin was "no big deal". I mean, I respect those who are trying to hold themselves up to certain standards, be it for religious or other reasons. Despite my seemingly strict definition of virginity I think in my eyes it boils down to intent. If the activity engaged in was intended to be sexual in nature and the genitals are involved then it qualifies as sex. However, I would not hesitate for a moment to consider someone who has been raped a virgin, since there was no sexual intent on their part. I think we could post long threads on this subject and never really come to an agreement. I guess in the end it's all very subjective, culturally and religiously influenced and ultimately a very personal matter for each person to decide on their own. Always an interesting subject to talk about.

I guess it all depends on how you define it. There was a similar post some weeks ago, check it out link removed it was an intersting discussion on the whole thing. I personally think that if a girl or guy gets sexual with someone else then they're no longer virgins. It's all about owning up to what one's doing. If you get sexual, then you're not a virgin in my opinion, no big deal. I mean all this talk about penetration or not, it's just a technicality. cause if you define loss of viginity as only penetration by a penis, then you could basically do EVERY thing else sex related and still consider yourself a virgin? I think that would be pushing it, I don't know. I think when people do sexual things that they're not ready for and they're not comfortable then they go back and want to find loopholes to try to turn back time per se. You know, wanting to consider themselves virgins again. But what is the big deal? If you were sexual with someone, then you're not a virgin, but you're still the same person you were before. I realize this is a very sensitive subject, so I'm sorry if I sound little too radical.

Nice guys don't go for the nice girls either, i think it's some sort of twisted karmic thing. Heh.

I agree with Amethyst in that there's nothing wrong with girls wanting to make friends with males other than their boyfriends. But he has clearly told her that he finds her attractive, making it clear that his intentions are other than friendly and she knows this. She still wants to meet him though, so I don't know, it sounds like she wants to play around or something. And like Blue_Soul said, if she wanted to just include him as a friend, then she would've suggested he hang out with her and her friends.

You've been with this guy for 9 months and you used to have good sex, but now he's stressed out (and you can't stand it) so you don't have good sex anymore. Maybe you're being a little impatient with him? You haven't been seeing him for that long. Funny thing is, if this post had been written by a guy (especially the last two sentences), you'd have lots more people replying to it and telling you you're being insensitive and that you should be thinking about your relationship as a whole rather than only the sex. I mean, do you care about the guy? or the sex? Guys' sex drive can change when they're stressed out, just like women. Maybe next time you visit, don't visit his penis, visit HIM. He'll probably respond better to that and you might end up having that good sex you used to have! It's not that sex isn't an important part of the equation, it's just that the way you wrote sounded like you weren't very concerned about how he might feel, just only about the sex.

So, if the guy uses a dildo or something like that she'd still be a virgin? Because that would be like masturbating only having someone do it for you by using a dildo. And if he uses his penis that would be like having someone masturbate you by using their penis?? Come on. I say people should own up to what they're doing! If they make a decision to start doing sexual things with their bf or gf then they are NOT virgins anymore. You can't go around looking for loopholes! You can't have your cake and it eat too. So for christians: supposedly the whole concept of the Virgin Mary is behind all this. Women following her example in remaining "pure" and all that. According to some people then, it's ok with God if she got it on with Joseph with the whole fingering thing? Yeah, how virginal is that? I don't have a problem with people expressing their sexuality, it just annoys me when people do stuff and then they want to still be virgins. If being a virgin is such a big deal, then why do anything sexual to put that at risk? And if you DO start being sexual, then just own up to it, you're not a virgin anymore. There's no degrees of virginity, either you are or you're not. Sorry if I sound a little worked up-- I have some strong feelings on this issue.

Animals do use some vocalizations to communicate with each other, they're not just limited to body language. I don't think we've "lost" our ability to read body language. We're definitely not as atune to body language as we should be, and you're right in suggesting we should be able to understand it, but it's not lost. I don't think anyone is trying to deny we're "basically animals" and that we should be able to understand body language better. I think the direction this thread was taking was that we shouldn't take observations on body language as rules telling us what someone is feeling based on how they crossed their arms or moved their head, but more as guidelines to help us understand other people by taking body language into account in conjuction with other cues such as tone of voice, context, etc. Because after all, humans use all of these to communicate.

When you're ready you will have NO doubts about it. If you have even a little tiny doubt, then you're not ready yet.

Sure, It's a stream-of-consciousness excerpt from a short story I wrote for a creative writing workshop. It's based on my experience on the day my father told us he was leaving us. The whole short story is not based completely on my life - but this part basically describes how I experienced that moment. I tried not to add any adult feelings that I have since associated with the memory. I just tried to leave intact, as much as I could, the whole surreal feeling that it gave me when he said that first sentence many years ago. I guess that's why it's a bit strange like you said. Thanks for reading!

It could be that she is "sex shy" like you said. It could also be that she is sensitive and that the vibration was too much stimulation on her clit. If she's willing to give it another go, you could try rubbing the vibrating egg around her pubic area (the mound, lips, etc.) with very light pressure, on the lowest setting avoiding putting it directly on her clit. Or ask her if she'd like to play around with it on her own (privately) and see how she likes it. She might say no if she's shy- but if you just leave it with her, she might use it on her own. Once she finds out how she likes to use it she'll probably be more likely to let you use it on her. Something to try.

"Would you feel less sad if I died far from you?" My throat tightened as I poured cereal in my bowl and swirled it around. My brother looked at me waiting, wanting to know how to react. He continued, "Your mother and I decided it would be best." I sprinkled sugar over it. My brother stared at his chocolate milk, glassy eyes shimmering slightly. "Mm-hm" I said. I cleared my throat. "Would you pass the butter?" He looked at me with sad eyes, trying to find my own, but I couldn't look at him. He set the butter dish gently near my hand. "I'll leave this weekend..." He said softly, his voice trailed off. In the distance I heard my aunt's horn beeping, we were late for school. I helped my brother gather his books and I grabbed my bag. He looked so small and sad. My father gave us a hug and sent us on our way.

Just think about changes in the persons own demeanor, don't look for any prescribed body positions. Like if you're talking to someone and they seem overall relaxed and animated- they probably think you're great to talk to. Or if you mention something they think is unpleasant, they might change their tone or sound like their voice is tense, etc. I'm sure the articles out there talk about things that have just been observed happening, not necessarily rules of behavior.

I mean nobody's mentioned it, but it could be that this guy doensn't like how your vagina smells and doesn't know how to tell you that and that's why he won't go down on you. No offense, some guys won't like how some girls smell even if they're clean. Some girls smell stronger than others. You could run a bath and make it romantic and have him soak in the tub with you. If after some "warming up" he can be more readily persuaded to try it, then you know what the problem was. Just another suggestion to try out.