daviepants Posted November 25, 2006 Share Posted November 25, 2006 If anyone can help me out, I'd appreciate it if you posted in my thread ( ) .. my story is too long to share here, but this thread is awesome, and really helps me take everything into perspective. Link to comment
SuperDave71 Posted November 26, 2006 Author Share Posted November 26, 2006 Chatbot, How was your holiday? You doing ok out there? Daviepants, How are you holding up put there? -Your Friend, SuperDave71 Link to comment
SuperDave71 Posted November 28, 2006 Author Share Posted November 28, 2006 Chat, REMEMBER: KEEP YOUR HEAD CLEAR!... It's amazing how much we learn about situations when you take a few steps back. Using an analogy...If you stand so close to a mirror, you can't see eveything. It's when we take a few steps back that we can see the entire picture clearly. Take care, SuperDave71 Link to comment
Tshwane Posted November 29, 2006 Share Posted November 29, 2006 im sorry for hijacking the thread but i just wanted peoples opinions. Here's my story, Above is a little history. 2 weeks i found out she was dating somebody, exactly 2 weeks later she want's me back. Where the new guy: i needed to feel wanted, i was just using him for emotional support. We hardly ever saw each other, and yes i told him about me wanting to be with you. "i don't imagine my life without you" My Analogy I've always been on/off nc for the past couple of months, but when i found out she was dating somebody i decided that was it for me. I always mentioned it to her before that if i ever found she had/has a boyfriend that was it for me. I think when i found out and didn't beg but just said goodluck and went total nc for 14 days that forced her into making a decision. I would no longer be a safety net so she had to choose between new guy and myself. i love her but i've realised that i don't need her to be complete or happy. I was dating some people and liked how i was letting go. I told her i need to think about it and if i do decide t try it out, we'll have to take things slow since a lot has changed(we've both grown so we need to start afresh) What do y'all think? Link to comment
daviepants Posted December 1, 2006 Share Posted December 1, 2006 Chatbot, How was your holiday? You doing ok out there? Daviepants, How are you holding up put there? -Your Friend, SuperDave71 I'm alright.. I've really missed her for the past couple of days. NC has been going on for about two weeks or so.. she hasn't called me or anything.. I guess I'm just worried. Having talked to her at least 3 times a day for the past 2 years is a huge change... =/ Link to comment
SuperDave71 Posted December 4, 2006 Author Share Posted December 4, 2006 Daviepants, How about an update? I saw that you were online? SuperDave71 Link to comment
need2bme Posted December 4, 2006 Share Posted December 4, 2006 REMEMBER: KEEP YOUR HEAD CLEAR!... It's amazing how much we learn about situations when you take a few steps back. Using an analogy...If you stand so close to a mirror, you can't see eveything. It's when we take a few steps back that we can see the entire picture clearly. I can vouch for that and say that it is 100% true. Also, as an aside, I am recanting my previous statement on this thread, about if I had stayed in my previous relationship, I would not have met the wonderful woman I was seeing. That same woman and I are no longer involved, so I wanted to come clean. Link to comment
SuperDave71 Posted December 4, 2006 Author Share Posted December 4, 2006 Thank you need2bme! -SuperDave71 Link to comment
jessicake Posted December 5, 2006 Share Posted December 5, 2006 Superdave, your amazing... the posts you write really hit the spot! My ex and i broke up 2 weeks ago because he was not certain i'm the person he wants to spend the rest of his life with and i've been dealing with it really well, not contacting him at all.. but he does occasionally text or email me to check in and i've been polite but non-emotional. But we have a mutual friend's birthday coming up and i'm not sure what to do.. she is a really good friend and i'm scared that if i go i will not know what to do. I want to initiate complete NC but i don't want him to think i am avoiding him because we were really good friends before we had our 3 year relationship. any advice anyone? Link to comment
SuperDave71 Posted December 5, 2006 Author Share Posted December 5, 2006 Jessicake, DON"T put your life on hold nor worry about what you ex is thinking. Go to the party, be yourself and SMILE! The day I put my life on hold for anyone ever again is the day I die. Your Friend, SuperDave71 Link to comment
SuperDave71 Posted December 14, 2006 Author Share Posted December 14, 2006 Jessicake, Do you ave an update for us? How is it going out there? -SuperDave71 Link to comment
rocket3425 Posted December 14, 2006 Share Posted December 14, 2006 Super Dave, you really have a grip on this. Sure wish I had known about this post 2 months ago. Could you please read the book of a thread I posted titled Long Distance Cold Feet and tell me if its worth a shot making contact again after the holidays. I gave space during the break but the trouble was we still got together for an event we had planned prior to the break and then the wheels started to fall off and then the ensuing breakup a few weeks later. Link to comment
sandyv Posted December 15, 2006 Share Posted December 15, 2006 Hey SuperDave: Hey never had an opportunity to talk to you, but tell me please???? I'm sadder than ever, its almost Xmas, I miss my ex, and am avoiding him at all costs, although he got himself barred from the place we used to hang out together a week ago..... long crummy story there... but its there.... Why can't I let him go, maybe cause I feel like he cares after starting a scene at "our" bar, I don't know.... please give me a kick in the pants... or panties whatever... thanks in advance Sandy... Link to comment
jessicake Posted December 15, 2006 Share Posted December 15, 2006 Jessicake, Do you ave an update for us? How is it going out there? -SuperDave71 thanks for asking! well i saw him and smiled and laughed and made small talk... but it was still quite awkward with him... i didnt have to spend that much time with him... he told a mutual friend that he was really upset and guilty that we were really distant.. (it was a v. good break up) i gave him a call and told him not to feel guilty because we broke up for the best. told him that we both need our space in order to become friends again in the future. i know that its chicken of me to call him... but i felt it was the closure i needed. (in a way!) since then i have txt him to say "please take care of yourself! and did not expect or want a reply and feel good about it!! thanks again for being such an inspiration to so many! Link to comment
SuperDave71 Posted December 15, 2006 Author Share Posted December 15, 2006 SandyV, I am getting ready to go to work BUT you have my word I wil post for you when I get there? Is that ok? Stay Strong....food for thought is coming your way Jessicake.. Glad you are doing so much better....Hang in there sweety! SuperDave71 Link to comment
SuperDave71 Posted December 15, 2006 Author Share Posted December 15, 2006 Sandy... Sandy... Sandy... What an I going to do with you? Let's break this down shall we? Christmas is in TEN short days. TEN days!! I have NOT bought the first thing but that is not your concern.. Answer this for me...Do you think you will feel the same or worse on Christmas day? Christmas is a time of Love, Joy and Happiness. I remember spending time with my family but I felt so alone regardless on Christmas...I hated it. But I learned something VERY important...I learned that I was the one making me feel that way. NOT them...I CHOSE to feel down and out because that is the way my heart felt. Sandy...I promise you something from the bottom of my heart..and everyone else out there that is feelin the same way. YOU WILL NOT bealone on Christmas. I will be right here posting away. I will be merely a post away. I don't want ANYONE EVER to feel like that do NOT matter becuase by golly YA DO MATTER. Just because the one you want to be with can't be with you right now DOESN'T MEAN you don't matter!!! You matter to SOOOOOO MANY people. Here's what I want you to do... I want you to put on your favorite tunes and turn them up loud... I want you to grab a beverage and I want you to dance in your living room....I want you to feel that music pumping thru you and I want you to think about alllll the things you are blessed with. Maybe your family, friends, eNotAlone, the MAIN reason for the season, your health and the other 10000 thinkgs out there. Close your eyes...think about happy times in your life... Take this time you have to PICK YOURSELF up.....Use your time wisely. What does sulking do? What does feeling down accomplish? NOTHING.. I know its not easy BUT IT can be done..I am living proof. Just think...next year you could be helping someone else with their problems. I know you would because of your loving, caring nature. You are an amazing individual. You have lots to do...You are a teacher. You have many lessons to teach here on eNotAlone. You stand tall Sandy. You straighthen your spine...and you put a grin on that face. WHY? Because the biggest journey starts with a single step my friend. God be with you! Your Friend, SuperDave71 Link to comment
25thfloor Posted December 15, 2006 Share Posted December 15, 2006 I can't believe i'm taking advice from a sponge. when does it all end? Ha HA...loved your posts. all of you. guess what, sandyv, it really does get easier. i saw my ex (broken up for 6 months) last friday at a Ball i attend every year. it didn't bother me that night, but for the next 5 days, i was pathetic. i mean pathetic. i wasn't enjoying my life, i wasn't happy, i was considering going back on zoloft (which i kicked months ago), i was miserable. i begged, i mean begged, my God to please send some strength and i slept a lot. now...after mourning the loss of that butthead for 5 days, i'm back to my happy independent self. you WILL get past. what's that famous quote? 'if you think you're in hell, just keep going?'. Link to comment
SuperDave71 Posted December 15, 2006 Author Share Posted December 15, 2006 25Floor... Thank you for posting that....YOU KEEP IT UP!!! Your Friend, SuperDave71 Link to comment
ryan4414 Posted December 22, 2006 Share Posted December 22, 2006 This helped me out a lot, thank you. I know doing this will eat me up inside but everything you said is right. Eventually I'll forget about it and if it was meant to be it will work out. If not, oh well. Thanks superdave, great thread. Link to comment
SuperDave71 Posted December 22, 2006 Author Share Posted December 22, 2006 Ryan4414, I wish you the best and HAPPY HOLIDAYS to you and your family! Thank you and if you need us... We will be right here. -SueprDave71 Link to comment
dnozzle Posted December 22, 2006 Share Posted December 22, 2006 Superdave speaks the truth. His advice got me through my breakup, and he was 110% correct in everything he said. Letting go is really the only way to move on and maintain your sanity. Superdave, I owe you. Bigtime. Link to comment
need2bme Posted December 23, 2006 Share Posted December 23, 2006 We ALL owe "The Sponge". ;-) Link to comment
SuperDave71 Posted December 25, 2006 Author Share Posted December 25, 2006 dnozzle, You don't owe me a thing.... You did all of this yourself and you should feel really good about it as well. I wish you and your loved one's a Merry Christmas!!!! Your Friend, -SuperDave71 Link to comment
Shaker Posted December 25, 2006 Share Posted December 25, 2006 You guys are awesome. I've loved reading through the posts. It's really helping me through a tough time. Still haven't heard from the ex myself, so I kind of feel like I'm waiting for the other shoe to drop, but all of the positive energy and well-wishes on this site are definitely making me stronger. Crank on some tunes, superdave? I think it's time for a tribute to James Brown. Get on up. Link to comment
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