Christi84

Well , I'm glad that there are guys like you out there somewhere. I'm a girl that wants to settle down and I find it hard to find guys that are like that. Most guys that I meet are into partying or clubbing all the time, not very responsible, don't take things seriously. It's hard to look at guys like that and imagine them being ready to settle....ever. Don't worry guys..there's nice, suitable girls out there who are ready to settle down. Don't stop looking.

Hi ErekaG*rl621 I feel your pain, I've been there and not so long ago. I understand the situation you are in and I have to say that I think the best way for you to take a stand against his emotional abuse (which is what it is..he's toying with your emotions) is to initiate NO CONTACT with this person. It's alot easier to say than do I know, but you have to BE STRONG and know that if there's any chance of you getting through this then it has to be done. Stop all contact with him, surround yourself with your closests friends or family members, people you know you are happy with. Stay busy, find a new hobby. Do something for yourself and push this out of your mind. After awhile you should begin to feel better about yourself and empowered. Realize that YOU have control over yourself, especially your feelings and tell yourself you're not going to let him control them again. After this, the next time you face him you'll feel like a whole new person. Your confidence in yourself should show him you're stronger and that he can no longer toy with your feelings. If he tries to anyway DON'T LET HIM. It's not worth it, distance yourself from him and move on with your life.

brtlangst , I just wanted to say that I'm happy for you . Everyone has their own personal "hell" and it really doesn't matter whether you're 15, 20, or 55. If you feel like your life is over and if you are resorting to killing yourself then I'd say you've reached your personal hell. I'm glad you made it out, I'm glad you made it through. Don't ever let anyone tell you that your pain is less than theirs. They don't know your situation and have no right judging you. Instead they should look up to you for being strong. Good for you. Take Care.

Thanks to all of you who read this post before I edited it and had some advice. I'm doing better now...thanks.

Thank you all so much for the advice you have given so far. I do understand it is a sketchy situation and I should proceed with caution. One part of me (my mind) knows that it's usually not a good idea to mix business with pleasure but another part (my heart) is so smitten with both father and daughter and would love to see where this could go as a personal relationship with both. It's a dilemma and I can't stop thinking about it. Your advice has given me even more to think about. Once I figure out what I am going to do I will update this. Thanks again for your advice.

Thank you all for your advice. I''ll be sure to try it out.

Ok, this may sound dumb, but I am afraid to give head (can i say that here?) I always get so nervous that I'm going to do it badly so I try to avoid it. The problem is, I know guys love it, well most that I'm aware of, and I'd love to be able to please whatever guy I am intimate with. I just get so scared that I'd do something wrong or that their seemingly good reactions would be fake. Because of this, I don't let guys go down on me because I feel like it's unfair to them if I let them do it to me but I refuse to do it to them. It's not that I don't know HOW. I think I do. I just don't know if I'm doing it well. Sometimes I gag because I get so nervous thinking about all this that I lose focus and gag or something., which of course makes me feel like a complete fool. I guess what I'm asking is, does anyone have any advice on how I can relax a bit when doing it? Has anyone had the same problem? Guys - what do you do when a girl does it badly? Thanks .

I wouldn't say it is contact but at the same time, it would be making a statement.

What exactly do you mean by "get attached to words"?

Hello Everyone, I've found myself in a situation that I am not sure how to deal with. Just looking for opinions. Sorry if it gets a little long. Thanks. I am a live-in nanny who has taken care of two small children Monday-Friday for the past 8 months now. Before I took this job, I had an understanding with the family that it would only be temporary as I was hoping to move away from here. So the time had come for me to start searching for a new nannying job. Through this au pair website I had met a single father (lets call him AML) a few months back and had been chatting with him. At first he was interested in me as a nanny for his young daughter. At the time I met him I was not looking to leave here so I turned down the offer. We stopped corresponding for about 2 months and then one day he appeared online and messaged me. We got to talking and what started out as friendly conversation soon turned into something more. For a period of about 3 weeks we talked every night on the phone and online. Sometime during all that he told me he was still looking for a nanny for his daughter. Though he lives in Las Vegas at the moment, the job would be in New York where he grew up. I had a vacation coming up out in LA which is just a short plane ride to Vegas, so I agreed to meet him and his daughter and see if maybe I'd like to be her nanny. The plane ride to LA was long and allowed me to get a few good hours of undisturbed thinking in. I thought about what my trip to Vegas would be like when I went there. Over the past few weeks I had really started liking the guy. Hours and hours of talking at night made me feel like I knew so much about him. Still, I decided it would be best if I maintained a professional relationship with this man. Halfway through my vacation in Los Angeles, I flew over to Vegas early one morning to spend the day there and return the next morning to LA. Meeting AML was interesting. What started out as a job interview quickly became a little more personal. He picked me up from the airport and took me out to breakfast. His daughter was at daycare so it was just the two of us. At breakfast we talked and talked and I was a little nervous so it was mostly him talking about his little girl and New York and stuff. He made me laugh so much by joking around and stuff. Anyone who knows me knows I love to laugh and if a guy can get me laughing the way he did , I'm all his. So after breakfast we go to his house and he introduces me to his neighbors and stuff. The whole time there was a sense of "tension" between us. We both wanted each other and we both knew it. Finally, it just happened. I can't even think of how it began, but it was wonderful. We spent the last couple hours of the morning in bed. That afternoon we picked up his daughter and the three of us spent the afternoon playing, went out to eat and the it was bedtime. I had intended on staying in the guest room but I ended up staying the night with him. It was all so different because I've never slept with anyone on the first meeting but I felt like I had known him for so long. The next day I returned to LA to finish my vacation. All I could think about was AML and his amazing little girl. I had returned there saturday and by sunday evening I was flying back to Vegas. I ended up extending my vacation and spent a full week there with them. I loved it. His little girl is great and she really got attached to me (and I got attached to her) in the short time I was there. As far as AML, he introduced me to his family out there, he didn't hide his feelings for me in front of them as I feared he might. He was very calm and cool about the whole thing. This surprised me because......he's 31 and I'm a few weeks away from 20 31 and 20......though the age difference didn't seem to bother anyone, if things got serious..would it? Before I came back home he told me that he wanted to pursue "us" and asked me if I liked that idea and I said yes. I think he's a wonderful man and an amazing father (that is so attractive). So here's the real question(s). Does anyone here think it's wrong what I'm doing with this man? Is the age difference too much? (keep in mind he's pretty young at heart, has to be with that little girl ) Any opinions or advice on this situation would be gladly accepted. Thanks for reading, I know it was long. Sorry.

Crush - i think i was about 6 or 7, a boy named Lee in my 2nd grade class Date - when I was 7 my mom dressed me up and sent me to the neighbor's house to watch movies with her son who was the same age. Mom made such a big deal about it..she still calls it my first date..little does she know I got scared before the movie even started and when he went to the bathroom I darted out the door and hid in my backyard for a little while...i was shy... Kiss - I was 12 Lost my virginity - 16....I always thought I'd wait until marriage. I was always a strong girl...I never let my friends influence me until it came to sex. I'd be sitting there with them and they'd all be talking about it and I was the LAST VIRGIN of my group of friends and I felt so left out. I didn't go looking for it but when the opportunity came up I said YES instead of NO. Wrong answer...

Pink Sunshine, I'm sorry you're in this situation. I know it's tough. I can say that honestly because I am in the exact same situation. I'm not going to elaborate right now as I am a bit busy and have to get offline in a few moments but feel free to chat with me later if you like. Maybe we can help each other. Reading your post was just so strange. It was like I was reading a post I had written...a post I've been needing to write for a long long time. Anyway, I feel your pain, I hope I can help.

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