SooSad33

Good for you! No reason at all for her to act this way with you 😕 Since your initial BU happened about 6 weeks ago, this is all very fresh for you two. She is likely fishing for a reaction from you, which she didn't get! Best thing to do is focus on your child. Is really the only necessary thing to do now, if you two are officially done. And yes, it WILL take a good amt of time for you two to work through your feelings and get over all of this. It takes time. But, in the meanwhile, Don't ask or expect anything from her physically.. although it'll be hard! She may likely be wanting to 'use you to get over you', don't let her. hey, if she wants to go out there & find a sugar daddy, w/e, let her! Respectfully keep your distance and rely on friends & family to vent it out, etc. Also remember to do some 'self care' at this time. Get your rest, get out for some air, keep physical ( some guys do work outs to get it out, etc). And good for you for reaching out here.. you're not alone 🙂 .

Aww wow 😕 ... Understandable because YOU spent so much love & time on making it all for HIM ❤️ . You did not feel any love or appreciation back. Do you do this a lot for him? or not sure how long you've been involved? ( just wondering cause I have a friend who kinda has been offended because his gf always makes him things - after all these years, he's only gotten maybe one 'bought' gift) .. I was thinkin.. wow. You do realize all of her time into this stuff? 😕 I always love someone's effort, especially made 'just for me'. I know it's taken their time & effort etc. 🙂 .

How about you just move on totally. Remove her from your social media. Often it's what best - the less we know the better. Then you can actually work on accepting & moving on in a healthy manner. Not sit there & watch all she's doing on there. Because, honestly, that is not the 'real world'. It's just all we want others to see. So, who cares what she shares or her pics etc. is just how some people are - whether it be an insecurity or some 'need' they've got. ( no one has to comment on any of it either.. right? 😉 ). Learn that self control. And I do not have any of my ex's on my 'friends' list. No need for it, as I stated. It's just another challenge I don't want or need.

I doubt she will. So, don't expect it. This is telling you plenty. She has ended this with you. She doesn't want it, then you respectfully leave her be now and expect nothing. It's done.

Well, no one wants a narcissist, lol. But, someone backing off does not make them a narc. So, no such description was needed there. Neither was the 'jealousy act'. Is up to YOU to work on accepting what is. Do you think there's some reason YOU acted out the way you did here? is it maybe because you fancied her but weren't getting what you wanted? - is still no reason to insult someone that way. Maybe you need to work on your own self? ( other than the fact that this isn't working out with you & this woman) . IMO, it sounds like you get upset maybe a little too easily - passing judgement too much with your responses and insults. If someone pulls away or goes cold, is up to you to work on accepting what is. You can't 'make' someone love or want you. And yes, this stuff will for sure kill the positive really fast!

Yes, it can be a real challenge sometimes 😕 . I do not venture out much myself. I go see my parents a few times a year & have a very small circle of friends. But, I have made it, over the last 5 yrs to the point I can walk my dog at the park sometimes - so I 'make myself' go out now & then. I say "just do it" and I do have to 'mentally prep' for these things. I am now also able to do some things around here. eg crafts. I crochet and bake ( for local youth shelter). I have lately come to hang out a lot on Youtube. I watch & follow certain things. Like 'live streaming' on things like plane spotting, Ukraine and wild life. I also watch many things I have an interest in. I learned how to crochet on Youtube. And I enjoy watching stuff like Adam Mark Explores lately. he's Britiish and tours old abandoned places 🙂 . There's so much on there to watch & learn about. So, I guess it's a way of learning more of what's available for your own situation. I am alone, but no lonely. Do you like pets? Maybe get a cat or some birds etc? And at the end of my day, I make a sleepy time tea and binge watch my favourite comedy. So, I say... keep trying. Don't give up. 🙂 . Things can change to your advantage.

You know, someone like this can't and won't change 😕 . is just how she is. Yeah, it's toxic on you. Sorry for your hurt- but yes of course you still want to be around the other family members! Any way you can spend the rest of your time elsewhere? Like a friends place etc- just not there with your mother.

Did you do the right thing - flaking back on her? Sure, if you meant it. ( So, no games). She flaked on you 3 times, if you're done then you be done. Expect no more. as mentioned, if she were truly into you, you'd know it. And I have no idea how you can 'love' her, when you two haven't even spent any time together. 😕 . is more like the idea of it all. You have no idea what kind of person she is. So, maybe work on getting her off this pedestal and moving on.

I am not bringing up any issue re: commitment, I've got other concerns, lol. Do you not see any of the above odd? ( Like YOU are truly the first one she msg'd?) I don't believe any of that! I had some guy say the same kind of crap to me a cpl times.. Oh my phone died... or I couldn't find it, it fell behind the seat of my car last night.. yada yada. It's because he was into another woman & was with her! I have a feeling there is someone else but it isn't working out with them or it's about her ex, whom she is not over yet/ they're not finished ( And a BIG red flag is hearing anything to do with a crazy ex! Tread carefully 😕 ..). I'd say she never got rid of her fb. you just didn't see her online. Anyways, who cares what she is doing online. Stop worrying and walk away from this. She has already led you on once, then disappeared. Then shows up again and seems to be acting weird with you again.. I think. Stop playing her games and think for yourself. IF someone is truly interested, you'll know it. Not be feeling this concerned about them & all they're doing.

With someone like this, you can't help but have it end up being messy. But, thankfully she is gone.. and you'll realize in a short amt of time the relief 😉 . Hey, toxic is toxic! she was constantly affecting you in a negative! Don't feel bad, she's likely the type to blow anyone over with her constant crap. And she won't get far with this 'want' she's got with having a family someday, seeing how she can be so dramatic & nasty within a short amt of time. Good on you. You've removed her now, she'll get the point. And do NOT cave in to answer if she tries to contact you! Be stronger than that- as you know exactly how it will end.

Yes, I'm sure she doesn't 'get it' because she never experienced this. As you said, you hadn't experienced it either.. until then! So yeah, good point made, that she doesn't get it 😕 .. Even though you tried to explain it in different ways, including her hiding fact she wears glasses. as example. From how I see this, is she may be wording it wrong on her own behalf. is not necessarily a full out 'lie'. It was something you were having to deal with and were actually in the process of .... So, not really sure why she reacted this way with you? Could be due to her own past is all. ( Lying, using, cheating ex's). So, I suggest you leave all alone now. Ball is in her court. You've tried and no response, then leave all alone now. Hey, was an experience. if you must, work on accepting what is now and move on. Expect no more.

Oh, I've experienced this and then some 😉 . Every person is different as is every relationship! Is why and how I know what I'm saying, lol. Which is, this is how he is now.. after many years of not being around him. The thing is, is he's shown you how he is now- which is no good for you 😉 . You now move on and keep walking! And yeah, you may need a little time to 'work through' your emotions. But be glad you've been shown this much!

Right, it's your 'thoughts', which is fine. You have no yearning to stray and know you won't, but because you've been exposed to some who are 'willing' to have 'open relationships' it's something else that's been on your mind. But, it's okay! Our minds are constantly whirling 😉 . Let it, then let it go. And I don't see any reason you should being this up to the bf. Why for? its just some thoughts you've had. It's not like you've decided to leave him. You are learning about others behaviour, basically. It's not yours. It's fine.. move along. 🙂

I feel you've been her emotional pillow. Sounds like the loss of her bf was quite recent ( as you said you two began talking back in April ( 2 mos ago), not long after her loss? Yeah, leave it at that. If necessary, give some distance now & then, so you don't get to feeling 'too close'. As Wiseman said, keep touring for friendships. And be careful in the meanwhile. You admitted she seemed a little 'off'.

Curiosity is normal, What's your ages? I have a nephew who had gone through his own 'curiosity stage' and admitted he may be bi, but is now with a steady gf. And he's 2 yrs into high school. So, I see it as he may have just been more curious and now knows what he does prefer. It happens. As for this thing you two have going on .. It IS very risky as you mentioned, what if he flips eventually? This can cause an uproar in your relationship. 😕 He is 'family' to you and it'd also be very straining on everyone including you, should you feel this need to keep secrets and should things get known, the reaction from everyone in your family unit. So, please think hard on this. It may be thrilling & exciting for now. But may be more stressful over time. Is it maybe best to seek this type of relationship outside your family?

I don't believe this will be successful due to her mental/emotional damages and instability. Is like she'll 'never let you live it down', since you didn't measure up to her standards, so the damage is done 😕 . She's a sad mess, imo. She'll never be truly happy. As you can see, the past will always be brought up. You've broken up, is maybe best to leave it at that. ( and don't offer 'friendship', is best to just walk away and leave all alone).

See how much people can change in a matter of years? 😉 . he is NOT the person you knew back then. Sounds like he's really messed up now. Don't even go there again! Be glad you got this eye opener! Stay away and expect no more.. Move on... fast.

I think all this was, was the 'anticipation' of actually meeting in person. And once you did, the 'thrill' was gone. And also, now that this schooling is done, she feels free again and is doing what she wants with whomever she wants ( using her dad as an excuse). yup, out of respect you just walk away and expect nothing more. All be okay soon again.

Leave it be now. No reply says enough. Expect no more. IF someone is truly interested, they'll show it. And it only take seconds to reply to someone. And do not be 'friends' with her etc on social media. No need. So many times I tried that & just removed them eventually. I then came to learn unless we're for real, no need to even add them etc to my list 😉

As mentioned, he didn't like being 'friend zoned'. So, he'll move on. But don't forget YOUR reasoning for this. As for his jealousy act, or whatever it is... who cares! The guy's not too stable right now, is he? Then yeah, forget his number and move on. ( and it also doesn't matter what his plans are or that he's busy on that time frame.. yeah, sometimes people have busy lives). It's maybe just best you accept what is and walk away, right? You removed his number, leave it as that. (never play head games). It's unfair and really adds to the problems.

Sounds like you married a sad mess 😕 .. But why? Why would y marry someone after only 4 mos? IMO< is wayyyy too fast! Look at what's going on ^ She's damaged goods and YOU can't fix that. Is up to her to look into some professional help. And for a good, long while, to work through her insecurities - or yeah, it will damage this relationship. And if you've put her on a pedestal, tread carefully. A 'Healthy' relationship is give & take, trust, communication, respect, etc. And in your case, I see her pushing you away in time, by either going cold or just causing fights that aren't necessary.

I suggest you leave it alone & say nothing. Of course you read it, he knows you will. As he said, he doesn't need a reaction and it doesn't mean he wants to try again. Move on and ignore now. No more interaction is necessary. Keep on moving ahead, as you were 😉 .

Exactly. Whoever's available and is able to help out, for sure. 😉

Right, does he know of this fact? He's busy but your dad is closer & more available. This should not be a big deal. I get the impression he's trying to 'prove himself', but it's not necessary. It is your home & your dad is around to help. That should be fine. Maybe he's showing some of his true colours? I suggest you give it a little more time and see how it goes with him. If he doesn't stop reacting like a child, give him the boot. Because HE needs to listen to reason and accept what is.

It's obvious you two are NOT good for each other. You are insecure and he flips out! 😕 And I am wondering WHY you share such things as your phone location to some guy you've only been involved with a couple of weeks!? You're not labelled and it's only been a couple of weeks.... You owe him nothing! Remove that access and get hold of yourself. Like I said, this isn't healthy at all. As for the bobby pin, ignore & say no more. Just be done with him. He's got issue's and you don't feel any trust here. Prime example ( other than the bobby pin) ~~> I asked him to please call me when he wakes up at 4am so I can start my day early (I tend to sleep through my alarm) and he said no. And it struck me as odd because he calls me all the time, I really didn’t think he was going to say no, he’ll call me at 6:30 sometimes 5 or 5:30. I asked why not, he said “because I said so, I’m not waking you up at 4am it’s rude” we went back and forth on it I told I don’t understand why it’s a big deal, I’m asking you too, it’s not rude. I said please just wake up, And it lead to me saying “I don’t get it. You’re really making me start to think you won’t because someone else is there, I don’t understand why else you wouldn’t” * There was no reason to say that. But you are , and going on assumptions, showing how little you trust.* Maybe consider some prof help if you feel you're lacking in some area's to where they're affecting your relationships. Dont just jump into them so quickly and focus on YOU for a while.