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elithepi

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Everything posted by elithepi

  1. elithepi
    He should kiss you...hell, you had YOUR mouth there...he needs to get over it and be glad.
  2. elithepi
    Use a condom. Ask your mother to get on the pill. Imagine how hard it will be to tell her you're pregnant. USE PROTECTION! ALWAYS!
  3. elithepi
    Sorry ladies...I was a bit tipsy last night...lol Let me ask you guys something, When is a good time to reinitiate contact after a guy does dumb things after a break up like dinking and dialing and crappy sad messages. i.e....when would it not make you angry?
  4. elithepi
    The way I see it is.....It's advice not to allow the panic of a sudden break up get the best of the dumpee. The first thing a dumpee is thinking is, "How to get them back." And if the dumpee allows emotions to control behaviour, THAT will come accross as obsessive and "freak out" the dumper. It's a tool to allow the dumpee to regain composure and allow logic to rule. And it's to allow hope without hope interfering. Nine times out of ten if the dumpee does not start NC immediately, they will make a freak out of themselves by whining and pining. And a couple to three months down the road, they will kick themselves for being such a poopy pants. So.....if nc i started from day one and continues for six to eight weeks, during that time the dumpee will probably not care as much for the dumper and begin to realize that the dumper is a jerk for dumping them and by successfully applying NC, the dumpee never reinforces any justification for the break up by the dumper. This thread is basic common sense and not a conspiriatory plot by the dumpees on the dumpers. Because, initial reaction to the idea of NC by the dumpee is, "I can't do that, they will forget about me, boo hoo, I gotta call." Then they call and make themselves look foolish, clingy, insecure, no life having,pathetic. It really isn't about getting back together. It is about healing. But if you want to make sure you never get back together....Do exactly the opposite of what this thread says. And forget about boyfriend/girlfriend.... I was dumped recently and I crapped all over everything. Couldn't stand the idea of NC. But...a couple weeks ago a 'friend" really did me wrong and it's been over two weeks now and I have YET to even think about calling them. No matter what the situation be it, intimate relationships or just friendly relationship....when someone is hurt, it takes time and space for any healing to happen and when the healing occurs then reconciliation can then be considered.
  5. elithepi
    Day 7....although I have no choice anymore.
  6. elithepi
    Well, it'sa lot kinder than this post by a female.....which isn't laughable at all.
  7. elithepi
    HDD, fix yourself a martini! It's cool, I'm right there with ya. I was fine the past couple days and then there is today. yeah, I wish you could be back with him to cause I wish the same for myself and it would be nice.
  8. elithepi
    Right on. Worry about it then. If you want to then, sure do it. But maybe you possibly may even forget about it. I've been thinking about crappy * * * Valentine's day. I'll worry about it then. Or maybe I won't.
  9. elithepi
    OK, mylast post on this thread. So, I got a shower and was kind of a wreck last night. Today, I really don't care. I feel I shouldn't feel guilty. I keep forgetting that she initiated the hurt. Didn't follow through on what she said in the relationship. OK, OK, I AM guilty of not NCing and taking a higher road. But I don't care anymore. I guess I needed to have all ties cut completely. I don't care.
  10. elithepi
    Things went really bad today..... I have to gaher my thoughts and make some sense of what had just happened. I know I shouldn't care and part of me doesn't but I need to reflect. I'm going to a friends house to talk. I got a real crappy call, people. I've done all the wrong things as far as contact goes. Last night I had a a bit of a tail spin and left a message about all the lies I felt. Got a call today and was told to not call anymore and if I left a message, it would be deleted without listening. I'm part way ok with that, seeing as I am going through the anger stage. I'm sorry guys, I never practiced NC at all and only dug a deep hole for my emotions. I must go and think. Talk to a friend. I'm so sorry that I'm not any better than I am right now. Got the call about an hour ago. "I don't see us as ever being friends." she said. "I'm really disenchanted with the whole situation." she said. So hope is all gone and maybe I pushed to that point seeing as I never got personal closure on the situation. I have acted all obsessive for the past few weeks and I'm am actually a normal guy. There's no more choice in the matter. I thought I was getting better but I could never accept this was happening and always called. So the end has been decided. My input here doesn't mean anything. I can't practice what I preach. Self sabotage is what I know best. I'm going to take a shower now.
  11. elithepi
    Cheers! I just distracted myself by taking a muffler off a car for a friend. I've never done that much auto work but lately I have and it's really theraputic. Thanks for the great words there, Neverland.
  12. elithepi
    Hey guys, sorry about multiple threads here but...... It's really beginning to happen. You all know how it feels when the dumping happens, we feel lost, no future, the weight of the world is crashing on us and we feel "trapped" and stuck in limbo. Very scary stuff. Now I can see myself. I'm in the future. Time has passed. I'm not healed but I can see life continuing on. My identity is returning, slowly. Kind of like a ball of tangled string. At first it's a big mess and you dread having to straighten it out. You try working on one knot, then you have to go back and pull in another direction. It feels like it's never going to get untangled and you want to give up but you can't. Well, it's beginning to look like I'm going to get it all back into a nice little ball again. I've almost got it untangled. I can see an end to the mess.
  13. elithepi
    Cool. Thanks Neverland. I guess we all feel betrayed and let down. I'm just starting to get over the grief and denial and now I'm getting into anger. Which is good because it's a sign of recovery. Damn thing about it, I just had a 15 minute nap and for a moment, I felt I was still with her. Like nothing had happened. An in between dream state as I was falling asleep. Those things happen. Thanks for you empathy. It is greatly appreciated.
  14. elithepi
    Cindersam, Don't mean to take over HDD's thread, but.... I was with her for a year and a half...It was really nice. Always laughing. I screwed up at the beginning of the break up by freaking out and calling too much. My heart still wants her back..I've got my own thread here just recently posted.
  15. elithepi
    Laid back... with my mind on my.... over the phone after 6 years....damn. Face to face is what I want. Hard to think someone is so shallow, especially after all the trust put into the relationship.
  16. elithepi
    Settling for a screw driver...
  17. elithepi
    ooooh yeah. A dirty martini! Olives are good.
  18. elithepi
    Getting dumped sucks a big one. Stupid people playing with us like that. Anyone got a beer?
  19. elithepi
    Oh, I was dumped alright. Never saw it coming. Totally blind sided. I've really screwed up since, too. I've called too much. I don't know the meaning of NC....lol Dumped over the phone. Does not want to see me face to face. Don't know why. Things were lovely...first relationship that ran so smoothly. She's since quit talking to me and not returned phone calls. Oh well. So yeah...the anger phase is kicking in. A lot of the misery is fading
  20. elithepi
    If he dumped you and he's calling and you're mad but don't want to say it....do it. I bet you it will drive him crazy. Geeze, can ya tell I'm a bit in the anger stage now.
  21. elithepi
    BINGO! Cordelia, let me know how it feels if it happens. I know it seems mean but if you were dumped, well, you got a lot of chips to cash in and it's a pretty passive way of sticking it to them.
  22. elithepi
    Who broke with who?
  23. elithepi
    If he calls and you answer....this is bad.... Answer and when he says "hey", you say...."uh, hey, can I call you back, I'm kinda busy now." He'll say, "ok" Then let him go and don't call him back. Make him wonder.
  24. elithepi
    Chill...it's ok. You are more mysterious to him now...in the back of his mind, he's wondering, "hmmm, what is she up to? She didn't answer. She with someone else?" Don't be confused. Be empowered. He was too scared to leave a message. If he had anything to say, he would have. Act like it never happened.
  25. elithepi
    I wish everyone wanted to sleep with me....lol Probably help me out as far as an ego boost. Yep...all alone here and broke.
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