elithepi
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Now that i'm ready, I'm very frustrated
elithepi replied to Orlander's topic in Healing After Break Up or Divorce
You are me....but in Orlando. Be patient, yes. You'll meet someone new without even intending to. It's the way it happens. The old saying is true. Just when we stop looking, love will find us. Has happened every time. -
There is nothing wrong with expecting a phone call from someone after having sex if it was not a one-night-stand. I don't see this as a one-night-stand because there was some communication before hand and what is wrong with expecting communication afterwards. I'm all about free sex and have had a lot of "flings" but hell, if you're talking to someone and eventually have sex, call the person and say, "hey, thanks for a great evening."
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ex called, but i dont feel so bad
elithepi replied to HDD's topic in Healing After Break Up or Divorce
It's good you didn't get excited when the phone rang. But since it's the first time in a couple of weeks, don't let the call set you back two weeks, lol. I think you are slowly healing like all of us but you will be truly healed when you don't feel the need to ask us. I think it's great you were able to have a cool conversation with him. Keep it up and look forward. You are right, if it's not meant to be, it won't and if so, it will, so there is really nothing to worry about. The future is all you have. -
Paranoid about being dumped again
elithepi replied to pip's topic in Healing After Break Up or Divorce
So true...We tend to make our own worst nightmare come true.... -
If you guys have been talking and stuff and then you two had sex, he should call you...... Apparently there was a small bit of communication established, so he should call. He's a jerk if he doesn't. But I believe you should get to know someone longer before having sex to avoid jerks be-it male or female..
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Yes, I want to be with her. I miss everything about her. Keep trying to convince myself life doesn't suck without her.
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There was physical attraction that began the friendship...immediate cuddling, no sex. That went on 10 months. And that is unheard of from me. What I mean is, I liked the cuddling and waiting better than what it's turned out to be. And she is VERY attractive. Everything I wanted, except the breaking up part. She can't hang out with an ex lover very well. It bugs me. I actually really LIKED this girl. I fell in love. I had a friend. Ugh.
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Today is her birthday. I sent her a "card" with the print of my avatar/picture. Forget any NC talk. So she loved the picture. Laughed about it. (I snaked it off this site!) We were great drinking buddies. lol ....it sucks when sex screws up a great friendship. I just want to hang out. Play some Yahtzee, Boggle or scrabbble then pass out on her couch. Whatever.
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HDD that is a positive I have taken. It is nice to have finally met someone who is ideal. It's just a bit discouraging to have lost the ideal person. It makes me think that if it took me so many partners through the years to find the ideal person will I go through the same drawn out process. BUT, now that I know what I like, I CAN be picky knowing what I think I want. And it's that catch again, really she wasn't perfect, she left me.
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I went out on a stupid "blind date" and it was torture. Left a bad taste in my mouth. It's been 3 months. Yeah I still miss her but I feel the need to get back out. Maybe not date or if I do, avoid dating an unknown. I realize, thinking about it, I shouldn't have a problem if I find someone interesting enough to me I'll be able to put the ex in the back of my mind in her proper place. I just had a really bad experience recently on that blind date and it has left a real bad taste in my mouth.
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Jayar, you are correct. But I don't even want to waste one minute of my time on the ones that don't messure up. I guess I'm jaded. lol Guitarman, it is a catch 22, exactly. Pinkelephant. Yeah I may have put her on a pedestal but the ONLY thing I didn't like about her was the way she broke it off. Everything else was really what I wanted. But that is another catch. If someone that was everything I wanted but turned out to hurt me....well, you know what I'm saying.
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Ok people, I'm trying to move on but I have a problem. I'd like to date around. Shake off the dust. But what do you do if the ex was everything (besides not wanting to be with you) you ever wanted. Sexy, funny, warm, affectionate, great personality, super charming, and again, very attractive. How do I overcome "the bar being set high"? I'm apprehensive about dating because I'm afraid I would constantly compare the date to the ex and it result in a bad date and only be a setback for my healing. The catch is that I feel the need to date so I can build self confidence back up and just get out and about.
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Hey, I was pretty bad off last night and it's coming up on three months. I find myself wanting to initiate a meeting with her but I know what the answer would be. I also realize I'm not ready at all, career wise and emotionally. I just put those (false) hopes of meeting up again on down the line into the future. Until I'm a better person. I tell myself, "Not now, I'm not ready." I don't give up hope, I put it in the future. Then when the time comes, I know I really won't care about it anymore. When those dark desperate feelings seem too much to bare, put them and the solution to them into the future, mentally, when you can deal with them. Set them aside. Tell yourself, "Yes, I feel this way but I'm not ready to solve it yet. In the future when I have my crap together is when I will deal with this." Recognize it then put it in it's place. EDIT: We obsess with the thoughts of the ex and it consumes us and stifles us. Put the obsession into the future to drive us to carry on!
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Music helps. When I'm all down and out, it's good to get in the car and crank up some tunes. It gets the rhythm back. I feel myself returning. Then it's good to listen to those songs that make me feel sad. I feel it purges what I harbor during the day. A good song is "What a Fool Believes" The Doobie Brothers
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been a few months. breaking out the tunes I like but were a part of that thing that happened. stir it back up. cleanse those associations. I like my music.
