Ms Omaniac
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I called him at work, I couldn't help it
Ms Omaniac replied to Ruthlah's topic in Healing After Break Up or Divorce
i know exactly how you feel. i was soooooooooo lost when my ex told me he never wanted to talk to me again. i wasnt remotely close to being over him. i was completely still in love with him despite how cruel he'd been the last few months. i would have done anything to work things out between us. but he was crystal clear...as is your ex. he was over me. he didnt love me anymore. he didnt even want to be friends. he was through with all the drama our draining relationship had caused and he was wanting something new and fresh. he didnt care if i sank or swam...he was moving on. so i had to. it was excruciating. and it took months to finally not be so depressed. but what FINALLY helped really was no communication whatsoever. because we had broken up but we were still talking...i was still clinging onto hope so desperately. but when i finally had to accept there was no going back...and i finally stopped talking to him...i FINALLLLY started to heal and slowly get over him. i was soooo weak before. im a much stronger person now. this experience will eventually make you stronger. but you have to surround yourself with people who DO care about you like your friends and family. and you need to keep yourself busy. but you need to concentrate on you. try and take care of yourself. read self-help books. exercise. try and become a strong, independent person that can rely on just yourself to make you happy. it's the hardest thing ive ever had to do. hang in there. -
ugggh...unfortunately...you messed up. you got what youve always wanted and then that scared you. you backed away...and hopefully not too far. what you need to do is as much damage control as you can to try and salvage your relationship. derek brought up a good point.. communication would have fixed this immediately. maybe it can now but it will take a lot longer to get to the point you ONCE had. you prob scared this guy. you need to talk to him AND then prove to him youre sincere. it will take a lot of redundant reassuring on your part but it will be worth it in the long run. try and talk to him...reassure him...take it slow...but communication is the key to make this possibly work. good luck.
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I called him at work, I couldn't help it
Ms Omaniac replied to Ruthlah's topic in Healing After Break Up or Divorce
so sorry to hear your situation. i was in your exact same shoes years ago. my ex pretty much said exactly what yours said. and you need to believe him. he is over you even though youre still reeling in the middle of it. my ex threatened if i called one more time that he'd change his number. i didnt call. and he NEVER did ever again. Im sorry honey....but he means it. my ex was also tired of putting up with our drama of a relationship and wanted nothing more to do with it. sounds like yours feels the same. best to try and not think of him and concentrate on yourself this new year. focus on you. be good to yourself and take care of yourself. -
ive stopped drinking. ive been sober for hours. im seeing things more clearly. i got up and took a bath and ate. i wrote a nice email to my bf and he wrote one back apologising too. im not drinking anymore ever again. that was the most painful lesson of my life. i would drink at night...every night....to be able to go to sleep. i have an anxiety disorder that doesnt let me sleep much. i found out alcohol puts me to sleep the whole night. but at too huge a cost. no more. no more. no more. thank you all for helping me in a really low and confusing point in my life. i appreciate the support tremendously.
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im here. im barely alive. ive talked to friends all day long. i need them. his dad still hasnt called or emailed me. i feel like MAYBE i'll be ok because i have a lot of people here surrounding me making sure i am. but he has no one. i was it for him. if he leaves me...he leaves himself. he's in a worse place than me. im scared for him. this is the last email ive sent to him. im doing NC now. i wish you would sell your house. i wish you would just move down here. i wish you would have a utopia with me here. i wish you could see how much i care about you. i wish you could see how my only concern is pleasing you. im going to stop emailing, texting, and calling you now. dont take that as i dont care. im giving you space. maybe you need that? maybe you will come to your senses and realize how youre happy with me this is what i emailed his dad. mr zeleny you dont know me. my name is ivy. im jeramie's best friend. he is not in a good place right now. im realllllly worried about him. im scared he is going to do something stupid. he wont answer his phone. i dont know what else to do. please try to make sure he is ok. and PLEASE let me know he is ok one way or another. please. you have my email addy. my phone numbers are cel........my house ....my office.......my mom's house which im at..... he dumped me on friday and i havent heard from him since. he did it for no reason whatsoever. he's a little outta touch right now because he lost his 2 roommmates which were helping paying his mortgage. and then there's that awful anniversary with jenn leaving him on xmas. he means so much to me. please. find him. please get a hold of him. im so sad right now. ivy
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raykay....you know...i have a degree in psychology. i should have known better. i saw the signs and ignored them. i told myself i was the exception. but i wasnt. im reeeeeeling in pain still. barely alive. not functioning. im a messs. who the hell would love this? who am i kidding. im a messssssssss.
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neither him nor his dad has contacted me. stilll waiting,
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im here, im barely heree. im with a friend. im barely sober. but im alive.
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im here. im still here. ive talked to my friend sabrina all night. i keep hoping he will call. i didnt do anything. im so depressed though. im...stilll....unfortunately....still drinking. one day at a time. one minute at a time. one second at a time. you guys....thanks.
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thanks to you all. im still trying. im still.....unfortunately....not sober. ive tried not contacting him. but it doesnt matter. because when i do call...he doesnt answer the phone. he is ignoring me. he doesnt even have the decency to yell at me. i left him this email. you know that book i told you about. the one that john gave me. he beggggged me to dump you. because in that book it said that you would treat and DUMP me like how you wished you could dump your Ex. but i thought you'd be different. but maybe not. maybe this is how you wished you could dump jen. and it's ok. ing come down to mcallen and kick my * * *. beat the * * * * out of me. get me to the point of almost dying. but then get back with me. no one. and i mean no one. cares about or gets you like how i do. no one. youre my world. come back to me. i care about you. no one will ever care about you this much. ever. there isnt anything i wouldnt do for you. please call me. im waiting...... pretty sad huh? i even emailed his dad asking him to check up on him because im scared he's suicidal. IM SUICIDAL. and he doesnt care. why do i care so much??? god god god god. ive been at my mom's this whole time. reeling. in pain. how am i going to cope on a daily basis? how do i function? what is going to happen to me?
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i texted him to please calllllll me. of course he didntl.
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whats sad is that i need to be drunk to be alive.
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someone....please...kill me. anyone. it would be a huge favor.
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i just now got home from a movie. a friend took me. WHYYYY it had to be a love story....i have no idea. i cried the whole time. it hurt to see the love scenes. im still crying. i wish i could hug someone. anyone. a stranger. i feel like im dying. the only reason im drinking so much is so that i wont start cutting myself again. i used to a long time ago. anyone out there...listen to me....dont date someone who's recently been divorced. they will date you and then dump you like how they wish the could dump their ex. it is the most painful feeling in the world. trust me.
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thank you. thank you sooooo alllllll soooooo much.
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HUG MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE.
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please someone......hug me.
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thank you. thank you. thank you. for whoe ever responded. im totally crying but ive woken up from a druken stupor. and im sad agian. and i read that. and it made me cry again. because someone cares. SOMEONE CARES. i feel lik e im dying still. but someone actually cares this is soooooooooooooooooooo painful. i just wish he cared
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annie....i want to die so badly. i havent been this suicidal in years. please please please tell me it gets better.
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im so sad i can barely type. my bf left me rather cruelly and unexpectedly in the middle of my office party. he is 4 hours away. he called and brutally just broke up with me for no reason. i didnt do anything. i feel like im dying. i cant stop drinking. i know he got divorced in june and his separation from his wife was last year on christmas. he cant make his mortgage payments without roommates and both of them left like yesterday. i feeel like he is taking this out on me and it hurts so much. please....im so lost....help me. why is he doing this to me? i read this article recently that hurt. it said to NOT date recently divorced people because you help make them whole....then they make you like their ex...and break up with you like how they wished they broke up with their ex...which is basically taking out their divorce with you. that is EXACTLY how this feels because it's for no reason. im dying. im sooooo dying.
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I agree with wild child. my eyes watered up. im terribly sorry for the pain you must be enduring. youre not alone on this website. other people do indeed care that what youre going through is awful. try to hang in there. i know it's not going to get better anytime soon...but hopefully eventually it will. you just need to do whatever it takes to make it minute by minute if you have to. you are in my thoughts. take care. ivy
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i do see your points. but if what he is going through is that tramautic...i also know it's hard to make someone else happy much less yourself. i might be giving him too much benefit of the doubt. i know though if i was in his situation...i might be a little flaky also and it would have nothing to do with my feelings towards the person im with. im just trying to cope.
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personally...i dont think he's lazy. i want to believe his life is chaotic right now. if his parents are divorcing....that has to be eating him up alive. he really needs his life to not be complicated and for you to be understanding. please try to give him the benefit of the doubt and not take this so personally. he would prob like to see you...he just...cant.
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I should have listen to u guys
Ms Omaniac replied to kere's topic in Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual and Transgender
i know a lot of people believe that once a cheater always a cheater. and for many people...that is very accurate. they get bored with the relationship and always want what's on the other side. but not everyone who's cheated before will cheat again. i, unfortunately, know this the hard way. i cheated on a really great guy and lost him. i hurt him and me immensely. i know now that i loved him but wasnt in love with him. but the pain i caused us both was soooo not worth it. i know now...if im not in love with the person...just break up first. now that im with my new bf who i know is fantastic...i will never EVER do that again. -
whenever i start to like someone from the internet...i usually start talking to them on the phone soon and then arrange to meet up with them. i understand using the internet to get to know someone to meet them. but i also dont want to keep it solely an internet relationship. if you can...to get these doubts out of your head...i would suggest talking on the phone.