wanderer

B vitamins help keep hair and skin healthy. vitamin b-6 is a good one, which i think is found in broccoli and some more obscure foods that i don't know of. hair is a solid form of protein, a protein that once outside the body (ie the hair that you see in the mirror) is actually a dead protein, so it's like it can be grown like a plant - the growth patterns start inside your scalp. human hair grows on average about 6 inches every year, which mean 1/2 inch per month. if you get your vitamins and keep your general health in good shape, you'll not only increase your hair growth rate a little bit, but the hair that grows in will be healthier and more attractive. essentially, your hair is a reflection of your overall health, so why not kill two birds with one stone and improve your body by eating well?

for me, it's about how the girl takes care of herself. anyone can be attractive if they bathe, shave, brush their teeth, come their hair and put on deodorant, all on a regular basis. plus, i don't think makeup is too attractive; i like it when a girl can be proud of the way she looks day by day. sometimes though, like for really special occasions, a little eye liner and lipstick can be really sexy, because every so often we like to see a girl primped up. about weight... there are people who are attracted to all kinds of body types. for me personally, i'm attracted to girls with my body type - medium to tall, and thin (i'm very thin and tall so it's a little peculiar when a girl weighs more than me but is a foot shorter) but also because once again, it shows respect for oneself. it's not about being skinny, it's about being healthy. too thin or too thick is just plain unhealthy, and thus brings back that subconscious feeling of attraction towards the "healthy" mate. just my thoughts.

i guess the general concensus here is correct. i think the comment about "wanting" rejection was particularly apt, that explains this one girl i liked... i guess we're sort of the opposite of predators in nature: lions will seek out the most weak and sickly gazelle in the pack, because it's easy prey and the lions are just trying to get their fill for the day. whereas humans, who aren't concerned with "survival" (aka the relationship "bare minimium"), would naturally want the leanest and best in the pack, whether or not they can actually get it.

(she's a girl too) but the idea is correct. have fun, go with the flow, but make sure everything is mutual between you two. and don't rush into things if you're not sure you're ready for them. if she respects you, you don't need to feel ashamed if you're not comfortable doing something with her.

i'm just curious... why do people seem to be attracted to what someone they can't have? (either the person they're attracted to is out of their league or they wouldn't be interested in the other person) maybe it's just a thing for people my age, i dunno. i was just wondering what your thoughts on this are. thanks.

just plain old ask her if she likes you more than a friend?? i can't tell you how bad i'd love to ask a girl i know that question. i don't ask her though, because i'm really not sure one way or another what the answer is. not because i'm afraid of rejection, but because i worry that if the answer is "no", it'll make our existing friendship really awkward, and push her away as a result. i also think that might pressure the girl to say "yes" even if she doesn't totally feel that way, so she won't hurt your feelings. then again, i'm shy and i lack confidence. as for a "fellow guy's" advice, i'd say it's a mixed blessing that you're "not even in the good friends zone", because thay way she can't drop the lame excuse "i don't want to ruin our friendship" if she rejects you. also, you have a little more mystery this way, and apparently girls like mysterious guys.

hmm, i think all of those questions vary depending on the girl. some girls love being fingered, for example, while others hate it. if you're both just in it for sex, i don't think it would be awkward for you to just straight up ask her out how to please her.

yes, he does. he says she only likes me as a friend. i imagine this means she told him so.

i found out that he just he asked the girl i like to our prom, and she said yes, so they're going as friends. i guess i know she's not particularly interested in me now. oh well.

uh oh dude, she's pissed. if she's anything like my ex, she's going to cheat. BUT, i don't know what she's like, so i'd say you should give her the benefit of the doubt and keep on trusting her until you can be sure she's over whatever this is. also note; she put something like that in her blog. she probably knows that you read it, and i guaruntee she was writing that thinking "let's see how he reacts to this". so i'd suggest you either take it up with her one on one, or else show her the reasons why she should not threaten to hook up with other guys like that. the only thing is, you want to make sure you don't give her too much power over the situation, you'll end up whipped. but it doesn't sound like you did anything wrong dude. she's the one being dramatic. good luck with this, man.

i wear black boots, and either baggy jeans or black pants. i always wear a fitted (but not too tight) black tee shirt featuring my favorite 80's metal bands.

well everyone knows he's gay. he's very open about it, plus he dresses very well. i think the fact that they know there's no possibility he might be attracted to them, they lik ehim better than me. my problem here also is that i don't think a girl has much reason to be attracted to me anyway, especially when i'm with him, since he's clearly more attractive than me (i'm mean i'm not bad, he's just gorgeous ) and just happens to be gay

i have something of a dilemma. i'm a straight guy, and my best friend in the world is gay. we've been friends since we were six. but don't worry, the problem is not what it sounds like. i'll explain what the problem is. anyway, he's extremely extroverted and social. EVERYone who meets him instantly falls in love with him, guy or girl, gay or straight, because he's very smart, attractive and outgoing. he knows how to have fun and he knows a whole lot of interesting and socially influencial people. he's very confident. he can meet 10 new people in one night, and they all will get his cell phone number and will all call him to hang out all the time. i'm more reserved, myself. i'm friendly with everyone i meet, but i'm just shy in general. i have very little confidence in myself when it comes to social situations because i think too much about how people are judging me. however, i can still entertain people and make people laugh a lot, whether or not i know them. my friend and i allways go everywhere together. this is the troubling part for me. i love hanging out with him, and it's through him that i've met a good portion of my current friends. the problem is though, that he's so socially active and so loved by everyone we meet, that i sort of fall behind in conversations and such. he's much more streetwise about music, movies, books and stuff so he can relate to people much better than i can (i'm not dumb, i just have different interests in music and stuff than him and most of the people we hang out with) moreover, it makes me feel like i'm the "second man" in the group behind him. when some of our mutual friends call me up to do stuff on weekends, i can usually tell it's because they called him first but he's busy already, so they called me. that's not to say it's his fault, or that my friends don't appreciate me, i'm just saying that people in general like to hang out with him more, and it makes me jealous and hurts my self-esteem. it's also is frustrating when we're hanging out with the girl that i've been pursuing for the past couple of weeks, she calls him up first, then calls me if he's busy, and she ends up talking to him all night and talks to me very little. (btw, she knows i'm interested in her, and i don't think she's interested in me, so that's probably the reason - but it's an example of a trend that i don't want to continue with other girls i like in the future) again, it's not like she doesn't like my company, she just feels comfortable with him, maybe cause he's gay (girls like gay men right?) the catch, however, is that he's the one who i really feel comfortable with, and it seems like only when i'm with him can i open up to other people and be outgoing myself. when he's not there, i feel more reserved again, and it makes social situations awkward. also, it's with him that i meet the most interesting girls, but again they kinda ignore me because he's much mor fun to hang around with. yet when i'm with my friend, we sort of stack up like this: the fun gay guy everyone loves, and his awkward, shy straight friend. i don't know what to do about this. i'm not condemning my friend, i love him very much and it's not his fault everyone loves him. i will admit that it makes me very jealous though.

i agree with you dude. though it depends on what way you intend to make money. you could fail all through high school and never spend a day at college, and get filthy stinking rich because one day you randomly came up with an idea for a car that doesn't run on gasoline, and you'd make billions. or you could be the child of a rich company ceo who gives the company to you, and you really don't know anything about the place but you get all the money, and everyone else does everything for you because if they don't you can fire them. hmm, that sounds cool. me, i'm going into art. i know i won't be a rich man when i'm older, but i don't mind because i don't want to do anything with my life besides make art.

i'm pretty sure you can get free condoms from planned parenthood at any age. i'm not sure how high quality those condoms are, however. they shouldn't card you for buying condoms. there's probably some law that allows buying them at any age because teen pregnancy prevention is a big issue and making age limits to buying condoms would be just silly. if you're not comfortable with buying or or you're still not sure, see if your friends have any they can give you. or get an older friend to pick you up some when he/she needs to get some.

that's the thing though. we hang out all the time and we have a lot of fun together. we go to different schools so i only see her on weekends, but when we hang out, it's like for 5 or 6 hours at a time. we go to different places and see different people but we're always together. plus, our date went well i thought. we talked the whole time, no awkward moments, and we had fun; and we were out for 7 hours, i remember! so we seem pretty close, which is partially why i'm so confused about her. by the way, metallica rocks.

i've been friends with this girl for a while now, we went out on one date but after that she told me friend (who in turn told me) that she only likes me as a friend. i stupidly continued to think she might have liked me, but then two nights ago when we were going to hang out together, just the two of us, she calls her friend (who i'd never met until that night) and tells her to come hang out with us. it was pretty obvious that she was trying to set me up with this girl, and she admitted to it later when i asked her about it. i mean sure i was flattered. the problem though, is that i've already gotten attached to this girl who've i'd been friends with already. and of course, i'm paranoid about just giving up on her because i'm afraid that as soon as i do, i'll lose any chance in the future of going out with her again. we did meet up with her friend, and she was pretty cute but she didn't talk to me much, much less her friends who were there, she just kinda sat in the car by herself. she made small talk and smiled, but overall i doubt she was interested, and i wasn't really interested because i'm still stupidly attached to the girl that tried to set us up. and ironically enough, i asked her about the girl later, and she said "i changed my mind", probably because she didn't want me dating her friend cause she says whenever she does that, the friend always hangs out with the guy instead of her. i'm pretty confused. i don't know how to get unattached to this girl. i've know her four about 3 months, and we went out about 2 months ago. she told my friend that she only liked me as a friend less than a week after the date. that means i've had just under two months to get over her, but i can't, and i haven't even known her that long. i keep on clinging to tiny signals of hope from her, some of which are probably exagerated in my mind. what if i just asked her straight up what she thinks about me? should i try to meet up with her friend again? i could use some advice.

it is best to ask her now or wait until like valentine's day? or ask her now, ABOUT valentine's day?

thank you! at least someone if aware of the nice guy syndrome.

my school has a valentine's dance coming up in mid february... maybe i should ask her to that? she goes to a different school than me, so i'm not sure if she'd be comfortable with that. or it may be too "formal" an occasion. what do you think?

but if he's going to be immature about it, i won't be able to get the point accross that he's the one overblowing the situation if if he is. i want to avoid an argument and drama, but i don't know how.

ok i have a pretty ugly crisis on my hands that just popped up. i could really use some help. one of my friends has been acting very childish lately. it's been annoying me and my friends for a few weeks now, including my best friend who i've known my whole life. he finally stopped babying her (the rest of us were for a while) and he confronted her about it. we all know she has some emotional problems that make her act this way sometimes, so i thought this was a bad idea on my best friends' part. i thought he was being unsypathetic because she told me later what he had said to her. he tends to be unsympathetic with some situations, so i understood why she was so upset. my best friend also said that we (our group of friends) agreed with him that we didn't like how she was being childish and all that. when she asked me if i agreed with him, i told the truth and said that i did agree with him. i also told her that i know my best friend can be unspympathetic towards other people's feelings, and that i sympathize with her. i thought this was the right thing to say because i wanted to let her know that while i agree with my best friend, i'm not turning my back on her. the problem is, my best friend found out what i said about him. he's very angry with me and he told me that he can't trust me anymore, after all the thing's we've been through over the years. i tried to defend myself, i made sure i didn't lie about anything that happened. i wanted to admit to him that i didn't mean to sound like a was stabbing him in the back, but i realise that it's pretty much exactly what i did. he said that i agreed with him and agreed with her at the same time. i admit this is true. honestly, i know i really screwed up here, but i was trying to look out for her interests because i felt like she couldn't deal with the situation because of her emotional issues, while i figured my best friend could deal with what i said later. it was a stupid thing to do. now i need some advice on what to do. he's my best friend in the world and i don't want to risk destroying that friendship. as i said he confronted me about it and i have admitted my mistakes to him, and i apologized. he hasn't forgiven me at all yet. i have no idea what to do or what i can say to him. i feel like i have said all that i can. i don't want to lose him as a friend over this. i feel terrible. if you have any advice, please please help me out. thanks.

hey, it's been a while since i've been here. here's an update on what's going on that i could use some advice on: so i've been hanging out with this girl that i met about 6 weeks ago. you might remember the story i posted about when we first met. we've become good friends over the past few weeks, and we hang out pretty much every weekend (not alone, but with friends). also, about two weeks ago i asked her out and we went on a date. neither of us have asked the other out since, but it's not an awkward situation. she's 16 and she's never had a real boyfriend before, only a temporary bf at a summer camp last summer that only lasted two weeks. as far as i know, i'm the first guy to ever ask her out, much less go on a date with her. my problem is i'd really like to ask her out again, but i'm nervous and i'm doubtful about it. i'm really into her so i want to take her out again. the trouble is, she's the type of girl who's sort of cynical about relationships - you know, the kind of girl that if you sang her a song or painted her a picture, she'd be more likely to see it as corny (but still sweet) instead of a really caring gesture. that's not to say she's cold or anything, don't get me wrong. so anyway, this makes me hesitant to ask her out again, because i'm not sure if she's into me as someone who could be more than a friend. she'd been giving me mixed signals over the time that i've known her. she says she has a thing for musicians when she knows full well i play guitar and drums, and she sometimes sits on my lap or puts her head on my lap if she's laying down. once we were watching a movie with some of her friends and she had her head only about 3 inches from my head/shoulder. but while she does this kind of stuff, she doesn't say anything flirtacious to me and she hasn't mentioned our date, and sometimes when i get a little flirty with her, just like complimenting her (not too much, just occasionally when it fits a conversation, and i say things that i believe, not just stuff to maker her feel good)but she kinda shuts off or drops a cynical joke or remark (not like bitterly or smuggly, but in a way that makes it look like she's a little uncomfortable). also, she told my best friend a few days after our date that she sees me as a friend (he told me she said this) however, i know she really had fun on the date two weeks ago because we were out for like 6 or 7 hours and we could keep a conversation going the whole time, not an awkward moment. plus, when we hang out on weekends, it's usually for a long time, about 5 or 6 hours at a time. on these occasions we usually hang out with friends and go places, and she usually rides next to me in the front seat (i'm usually driving) so i'm confused about her. help!! sorry for the long post and sorry this is another "does she like me" thread, but thanks for reading and thanks in advance for any input, it's greatly appreciated cause i'm in the dark here.

i haven't been here for a while. anyway, here's my situation: last saturday i went out with a girl that i had met a few weeks prior (we were hooked up by mutual friends). long story short, the date went really well in my opinion; we we're actually out for about 6 or 7 hours, got dinner and saw a movie, and just hung out and talked. there weren't any awkward silences or anything like that throughout the whole date. i'd like to ask her out again soon. the trouble is, she's sort of shy when it comes to dating, so she doesn't flirt, and without that i have a hard time figuring out if she likes me as much i liker her. i'm pretty sure i'm the first guy who's ever asked her out, or at the very least the first actual date she's been on, based on what she told me (she had one "boyfriend" for a few weeks but it was at a summer camp) also, this weekend my friends (who are a couple) want to go on a double date with me and the girl i went out with 3 days ago. i'd like to go out with her again, certaintly, but i feel like asking her out two weekends in a row might come off as needy or something like that and might make her think i'm desperate or something. am i just being paranoid? what do you guys think? thanks in advance for any advice.

... i prefer just regular making out... if i want to play capture the flag, i'll get some buddies and go paintballing in the woods.