m6r18p65 Posted August 4, 2020 Share Posted August 4, 2020 If you (female) had a friend (male) that invites you out and the last 3 times you have given them these responses what should the male friend interpret from them? The male hasn’t always given a lot of prior notice to the female. 1. Oh I wish I could but I’m getting my hair done and that takes a few hours. (Historically old excuse). I would never blow you off. I only get my hair done like once every four months at the salon. You can come down and visit me while I’m sitting waiting for my hair to process :-) 2. Hun wish I could, I have prior obligations. Darn 🤨 3. Yeah, darn. I already have plans. Don’t stop asking.. One of these days it’ll work. Link to comment
Wiseman2 Posted August 4, 2020 Share Posted August 4, 2020 I would not bother with someone who has these attitudes or plays these games.. Don't string anyone along. If you don't like the guy or don't want to date him, be sincere rather than giving these obnoxious replies or trying to play hard to get. If you think he only want's last minute hookups then lose his number rather than trying to train him like a dog obedience school with these responses. 1. Oh I wish I could but I’m getting my hair done and that takes a few hours. 2. Hun wish I could, I have prior obligations. 3. Yeah, darn. I already have plans. Don’t stop asking.. One of these days it’ll work. Link to comment
tattoobunnie Posted August 4, 2020 Share Posted August 4, 2020 Stop asking last minute Link to comment
maew Posted August 4, 2020 Share Posted August 4, 2020 Ask her out on a proper date and then plan it for a day that she doesn't have prior obligations... whether that's a few days or a few weeks in advance. Link to comment
banana79 Posted August 4, 2020 Share Posted August 4, 2020 If I were male and someone gave me these reasons previously, then I’d call BS. Doesn’t matter if I keep asking the woman last minute, I’d assume she was too scared to admit she just doesn’t want to hang out with me anymore. Link to comment
m6r18p65 Posted August 4, 2020 Author Share Posted August 4, 2020 I have an ever changing schedule. I find out on Wednesday what my schedule is starting 2 days later. Ie. On 05-aug I see that I’m off on 07-aug and 11-aug. Friday is 07-aug, ok maybe short notice but I can’t plan 14-aug because I do not know yet if I’m off then. Link to comment
reinventmyself Posted August 4, 2020 Share Posted August 4, 2020 Friendships/relationships should be equitable. Does she ever extend an invation? If you are doing all the asking and keep getting turned down, then it's time to stop. Link to comment
DancingFool Posted August 4, 2020 Share Posted August 4, 2020 I have an ever changing schedule. I find out on Wednesday what my schedule is starting 2 days later. Ie. On 05-aug I see that I’m off on 07-aug and 11-aug. Friday is 07-aug, ok maybe short notice but I can’t plan 14-aug because I do not know yet if I’m off then. Asking on a Tues/Wed for a date on Friday is NOT short notice. A woman who is actually interested will be thrilled to go out with you and even move around, rearrange other plans if she has any. Last minute is asking Thursday or Friday to go out on Friday. That said, if this is how she is speaking to you, please find some self respect and drop her cold. I wouldn't treat a cockroach like that and you shouldn't tolerate that kind of behavior from people ever. Most people would wash their hands of someone like that pretty fast. She isn't interested and she can't even manage to say so politely. Instead she is being rude and treating you like dirt hoping you'll eventually get the hint and go away. Link to comment
Wiseman2 Posted August 4, 2020 Share Posted August 4, 2020 Ok, she's jerking you around. Stop asking her out and lose her number. On 05-aug I see that I’m off on 07-aug and 11-aug. Link to comment
melancholy123 Posted August 4, 2020 Share Posted August 4, 2020 I call BS on this! I think she does not want to go out with you and just doesn't want to tell you that. Move on. Link to comment
Batya33 Posted August 4, 2020 Share Posted August 4, 2020 If she can't make it and doesn't offer a firm date/time she can make it -and asks you with enthusiasm if you can make it then, it's a non starter. Move on. Link to comment
Hollyj Posted August 4, 2020 Share Posted August 4, 2020 If they want to hang out, they will reach out and plan something. Do not contact her again. Link to comment
Rose Mosse Posted August 4, 2020 Share Posted August 4, 2020 I don't think she's interested. You're giving ample time from the sounds of it with enough options. Link to comment
Cherylyn Posted August 4, 2020 Share Posted August 4, 2020 I would interpret it as the female isn't interested in the male. The male should take a hint by now. Link to comment
poorlittlefish Posted August 5, 2020 Share Posted August 5, 2020 Each one of those times she turned you down she could have suggested an alternative date/time when she'd be free. She didn't do this, so stop wasting your time. If she was interested she'd have made it happen by now. Link to comment
greendots Posted August 6, 2020 Share Posted August 6, 2020 You could call her on it. Say something like "how about you suggest a time and date that works for you". Her response will be revealing. Link to comment
abitbroken Posted August 6, 2020 Share Posted August 6, 2020 You could call her on it. Say something like "how about you suggest a time and date that works for you". Her response will be revealing. Normally, i would agree but she has specifically asked him NOT to ask her out again. If she actually is interested, SHE will ask HIM out. He made his point that he is interested. The first time, it would have worked out better if he was flexible on the date - gave her two days to pick from, but that doesn't help now. She is clearly not interested. And follow her wishes and DO NOT ask her out again. She will only be on the defensive. There is no indication here that she is interested, but busy If i was busy but very interested i would say "sorry, i have a salon appointment and i have no clue how long it will go, but maybe another day? " And if he said yes to that, i would tell him when i was free. Link to comment
greendots Posted August 6, 2020 Share Posted August 6, 2020 Normally, i would agree but she has specifically asked him NOT to ask her out again. Ooh, I missed that bit. I thought it said "don't stop asking." I still agree with you though, she doesn't sound interested anyway. 3. Yeah, darn. I already have plans. Don’t stop asking.. One of these days it’ll work. Link to comment
abitbroken Posted August 6, 2020 Share Posted August 6, 2020 Ooh, I missed that bit. I thought it said "don't stop asking." I still agree with you though, she doesn't sound interested anyway. Maybe i misread it. Maybe she DID say DO NOT stop asking, but i really think she is not interested truly but likes the attention. If a woman turns you down that many times, do not KEEP asking. Have some dignity. You have asked enough, so move on - if SHE asks you out, different story. You don't want to be a guy that's just an ego boost for her. Asking her out a fourth time looks like begging, honestly. There may be a young woman out there who would be more than happy to go out with you. She is WAY too much work Link to comment
WalterSobcha Posted August 8, 2020 Share Posted August 8, 2020 If someone keeps asking you out and you, somehow, are never free at the times they suggest (which could happen), surely you would take it upon yourself to suggest a date/time that would work for you, IF you were interested. If you've asked someone out three times, and every time they replied with a "no" and no alternative options to make it work, then the message is pretty clear. Link to comment
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