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Cherylyn

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Everything posted by Cherylyn

  1. Don't have any drama in your life. Become a dismissive person internally and don't engage if it's not worth your time, energy and unnecessary stress. In my current midst, there are a few people whom I'm not fond of yet I need to cross occasional paths with them. I have a rather "blah" attitude. I don't give them the time of day. I'm too consumed with my daily life and after all is said and done, I'm too exhausted to care. Learn to distance yourself from people who don't ring true, who are perceived as insincere, fake, phony or pretentious. As soon as I sense that the other pers
  2. I would only quit your current job if you have a "Plan B" meaning a place to stay should you deplete your savings while applying and waiting for new job offers. If you can move in with your parents, friends or family when and if your savings is gone, then yes, quit your job knowing you have a cushion. You don't want to be in trouble if you quit your job, don't have any savings left and you don't know how to pay your monthly rent. Let money and financial security dictate your decision.
  3. I have all sorts of nasty experiences with colleagues as do my parents, husband, sons and everyone. It comes with the territory. Get used to it! There will ALWAYS be people whom you don't admire yet you're lumped together whether it's at the workplace, other times in your personal life such as partners' (or spouse's) relatives, friends, in-laws, etc. This is the world we live in and often times you have no control over various personalities or characters whom you don't approve of. Some people are unacceptable, intolerable, very rude, obnoxious, unkind, indifferent, apathetic and inco
  4. Never try to change a man because you're just wasting your precious time and energy. They're not worth it. Never waste your youth on anybody otherwise you'll end up with regrets galore. With all due respect, you are naive and hadn't experienced enough life yet with so many unacceptable and intolerable characters. One of these days, you will become similar to me: wary and jaded which is a form of your own safety, protection and security. Red flags in your brain are there for a reason. Listen to your warnings and take heed. Some people are dangerous to your mental and physical well bein
  5. He's a boy and not a man. He's very immature and selfish. He hasn't grown up yet and never will. He's set in his ways. You cannot interact with those who lack empathy. Those who lack empathy, lack emotional intelligence. Google "emotional intelligence." You can't deal with these types of people and if you do, all you do is force yourself to accept poor communication styles and again, he doesn't feel for you because he can't and won't. I've known several people in my life reminiscent of your partner. People such as your partner require high maintenance and you must accept the
  6. No, don't wait for him and don't keep hope. I'm sorry. He will follow his parents and listen to his mother. His mother and parents take priority over you. This is your harsh reality check. He will not go against their decision. Their decision is his decision. They are in unison and lockstep. He is obeying his parents. Do not contact him anymore. Leave him alone and move on.
  7. Your partner owed you a sincere apology yet he gaslighted you. Google "gaslighting" which is very ugly, wicked and nasty psychological warfare. Never become a naive victim of gaslighting. I know a few people in my life who are masters at gaslighting. Gaslighting is changing the subject, deflecting and changing your perception of the facts. You are labeled as the crazy one. You end up arguing and defending yourself in vicious, dizzying, exasperatingly endless circles going nowhere. It is the oldest, most manipulative trick in wearing you down in order to win arguments. Gaslighters are j
  8. Show her where the door is and tell her, "Don't let it hit you on your way out!"
  9. Dissolve and exit the relationship. She is not serious about you or the relationship with you. There is no commitment for the future because her mind keeps wandering away. You need to be with someone who knows how to treat you with sincere respect.
  10. You are being used and taken advantage of. Your boyfriend gave you a snack. What a guy! In the meantime, you are worked as if you're a slave. Sooner or later you will burn out. One of these days, you will be so mentally and physically drained that you will inevitably quit the relationship which is to your benefit. Never accommodate anyone unreasonably at your expense. I've since learned this memorable lesson the hard way years ago. Never cater to anyone's needs 24 / 7. You need to focus and concentrate on your mental and physical well being first and foremost. Your
  11. For starters, stop comparing yourself to others. Don't be envious or jealous of others. Be your own person in a good way. Be self confident, intelligent and wise yet humble. Change the way you think, clean up your mind, clean up your language and you will give yourself self-respect. If you want a stellar man, then become a stellar lady. If you want to get married, become an honorable person worth admiring and pursuing. There's nothing more attractive than self confidence. Develop your own life and you will have that draw without having to try so hard. Then you will tra
  12. He's telling you that he doesn't have brain space, time nor energy for you. He's too consumed with his own life, job, survival and stress. Get his message, take a hint and move on with your life without him in it.
  13. Both my husband and I've been working from home for over a year and we couldn't be happier. 🙂 We save a ton of money on gas, stress, wear 'n tear on our cars, sleep and there's more TIME. We get up at 6AM instead of our previous 5AM. There's NO TV nor distracting background noise whatsoever. The house is QUIET because we need to concentrate on our jobs. No, there are no chores, lying down nor naps. However, once it's late afternoon, our day is done. Then laundry, wash dishes or load the dishwasher, other chores, tasks and local errands. My thoughts are: Do whatever
  14. Then consider him as a friend only and nothing else. Since you're financially strong and independent, you're better suited with a man who is the same.
  15. I would begin processing a divorce.
  16. He was playing both sides of the fence plus he lied to you. In your mind, you should be saying, "Good riddance!"
  17. They're still your friends. Just because friendship was temporarily put on pause, it doesn't mean your friends are no longer your friends. I've noticed that with any friendship, you can't always wait for the other person to make the first move. You have to often times initiate, suggest, reach out and keep the momentum in the friendship going without keeping score with who did what first or how often. In order to sustain friendship, there needs to be mutual rhythm and enthusiasm. If you allow too much blank time to lapse, this is how friendships drift apart and fade away quite easily.
  18. I remember favors, kindness extended to me and my family and goodwill from friends and extended relatives. By the same token, I've done a heck of a lot for them as well and even more so now that I think about it. Nonetheless, memories of past kindness bestowed upon me is not good enough and will not compensate for the fact that some people are not consistently kind, considerate nor currently respectful towards me as of late. At this point, their rude behaviors outweigh any fond memories I have of them. I can easily drift apart because they've dared to cross the line with me by treating me
  19. What is your purpose? Will it put your mind at ease to reach out to her and sincerely apologize? What do YOU want to do? People are very different with their reactions or non-reactions. Since so much time had lapsed (as in many years), some people don't wish to be bothered because they've since moved on with their very busy lives long ago. Some people do not want to be reminded of the past gone awry. Don't be surprised if some people ignore you because this is human nature. This is not the movies. Simply learn from your mistakes, become a better person and navigate yourself w
  20. I commend you for having a conscience. I know so many people who don't have a conscience and would never admit to wrong doing in a million years. Don't be so hard on yourself. All you can do is learn from your guilt and become a better person for the current people in your life and people in your future. You'll be more careful with what you say and write from now on. I wish there were more people like you. Recently, I did something kind for a disadvantaged, unfortunate person and an acquaintance texted: "Bless your heart" instead of saying / writing: "You were honorable and I c
  21. I would text her one last time. Write this: "Her Name, It is time to go our separate ways. Please do not contact me anymore. Please respect and honor my wishes. I wish you all the best. Your Name." If she contacts you relentlessly, then ignore, ghost, block and delete her permanently.
  22. It's only been 2 days. Give her a chance. She's probably thinking about it and mulling it over. If she continues to ignore or snub you, there is your answer. She's not interested and after a couple of dates she wants nothing to do with you. If this is the case, respect her wishes and leave her alone. Don't bother. I agree with others, try a phone call or leaving a voice mail. If still no response, take a hint and get her message. Don't contact her anymore.
  23. I'm sorry you're going through this. I hate to tell you this but common sense dictates that your relationship with him is over. ☹️ Both of you had out of control drinking episodes, far too many cross words were exchanged, he has sad family issues he needs to deal with, there was bad name calling and a lot of unnecessary angry back 'n forth drama. The one good thing you did was decline friendship because friendship with him wouldn't have been healthy anyway, would've felt awkward and wouldn't have lasted. If there's one thing I've learned about human nature, relationships
  24. If I were you, I'd make an appointment to see a doctor who specializes in the hands, wrists and elbows area. My husband, son and I went to a specialist and the problem was solved either with physical therapy or surgery.
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