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Thread: ping pong show.....on our honeymoon

  1. #21
    Platinum Member lavenderdove's Avatar
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    Look, most women (and men) want their honeymoon to be a nice, romantic, loving introduction into their marriage. She doesn't want that kind of show as part of her loving memories of what should be a special time for the BOTH of him, not just entertainment for him.

    She needs to tell him how she feels, and tell the truth, and find somewhere else to go on the honeymoon because most likely he will pout if he doesn't get to take the grand tour. If he insists on this or disregards her feelings or they have very different ideas of what is OK when it comes to this kind of a thing, it could be a BIG problem later that she needs to address now before it turns into a bigger one than it is.

  2. #22
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    My gut reaction -tell him to go see a ping pong show for the bachelor party and not to bother coming back. My second reaction - if this is a complete shock to you (i.e. if he doesn't frequent strip clubs, etc) then talk to him and see if he can see your point of view. If it is consistent with what he generally likes to do then ask him to compromise this one time and accept as you have in the past that this is what he likes to do.

  3. #23
    Bronze Member jimmyh's Avatar
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    How old is he? I wouldn't see that if they paid me. If it is important to him, there is a basic incompatibility between you two. I really don't think he realizes how unhappy you are with it. You must discuss it with him and after that you are allowed to get upset and consider other options.

  4. #24
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    Originally Posted by Crazyaboutdogs
    Exactly. It is idle curiosity and to be able to say to everyone back home "wow, I was there!" and then have everyone around the water cooler say in awe "wow, you were there! what was it like eeeewwww gross...but tell me more, I want to know it all". If the visit is not to partake in it, it is for the shock value of being able to yammer on to all the friends that they were there and saw it all. I doubt very much if this will turn into an advocacy and women's rights excursion.
    I don't think it has to be like that.

    You've never just gone and walked by a homeless shelter, for example? It can be a centering moment. Understanding fully how the world works... seeing the misfortune of others often puts into perspective just how fortunate you are. Maybe it doesn't turn into an advocacy and women's rights excursion. But maybe it changes how they choose to make their next charitable donations. Or maybe they decide that they feel the hype is more than the reality. Who knows.

    Why does it have to be about yammering to friends? Why can't it be about understanding the world? Or self-reflection? Or spirituality? Or... a number of things.

    I dunno... personally? I don't do things just to tell people about them. I do them for my own knowledge and growth.

    Anyways... we are never going to agree... so I'll stop posting now.

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  6. #25
    Platinum Member redrose85's Avatar
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    Have your own ping-pong show He won’t be interested in the strippers and prostitutes anymore...

  7. #26
    Platinum Member PaintWithLight's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by redrose85
    Have your own ping-pong show He won’t be interested in the strippers and prostitutes anymore...
    I doubt this. He sounds like he needs to get his twist on in a major way.

    Just a question to the OP, who is the one who selected this destination for the honeymoon? If he was the one pushing for it from day 1 then you do have a big problem. A honeymoon should not be an excuse for sexual tourism. The fact that he cannot see that this is so distasteful at such an early stage in your relationship is a huge red flag.

    If this is the same guy who is moody, thinks of suicide and has regular out bursts of anger.... then it begs the question why you are getting hitched to him. I do not think he sees you as a life mate but merely the convenient woman for him over the last 6 years. Even the honeymoon seems to be viewed as a chance to get his sexual freak on rather than creating an emotional touchstone for the rest of your life together. This guys sounds really damaged and you have a hint of codependency. Any chance of halting the marriage until you get some counseling??
    Last edited by PaintWithLight; 05-19-2012 at 06:52 PM.

  8. #27
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    Personally I think the idea of the ping pong show is disgusting, but I would most likely be interested in going around to see the prostitutes myself.

    Although I understand where you are coming from, I also understand his position on it. It is something new that he may never get the chance to see... Let me ask you, is he someone that can afford to go to Thailand whenever he wants? This could be his only opportunity. I would be upset if I was going to a place I knew I would most likely never return to and I couldn't see or do the things that I was curious about. Now if this is some place that you can go to any time, then he should skip it.

  9. #28
    Platinum Member OptomisticGirl's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by Avacel
    Personally I think the idea of the ping pong show is disgusting, but I would most likely be interested in going around to see the prostitutes myself.

    Although I understand where you are coming from, I also understand his position on it. It is something new that he may never get the chance to see... Let me ask you, is he someone that can afford to go to Thailand whenever he wants? This could be his only opportunity. I would be upset if I was going to a place I knew I would most likely never return to and I couldn't see or do the things that I was curious about. Now if this is some place that you can go to any time, then he should skip it.
    What exactly is so fascinating about prostitutes again? They exist the world over - don't need to go to Thailand to see them.

  10. #29
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    Originally Posted by OptomisticGirl
    What exactly is so fascinating about prostitutes again? They exist the world over - don't need to go to Thailand to see them.
    It's just different. I don't think a Dallas prostitute would be as interesting as a Thailand prostitute, especially if it is an area that is full of them.

    People just have different interests I suppose. This would interest me, just like something dumb (IMO) like golf would interest someone else.

  11. #30
    Platinum Member OptomisticGirl's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by Avacel
    It's just different. I don't think a Dallas prostitute would be as interesting as a Thailand prostitute, especially if it is an area that is full of them.

    People just have different interests I suppose. This would interest me, just like something dumb (IMO) like golf would interest someone else.
    But how exactly do you 'see' a prostitute without being a client? Just walk down the street and watch them pick guys up?

    Bit odd.

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