Zenon1267 Posted December 2, 2020 Share Posted December 2, 2020 I feel like I cannot breath in my relationship. My girlfriend constantly hurts my feelings by hanging up on me, blocking me, and saying just crazy things. We’ve been dating for a year, she caught me cheating 4 months ago. It took a lot for her to forgive me. I’m not sure if she ever had actually forgave me or what is going on. I told her I was sorry but I don’t think I did enough to show her as she says. A month ago I catch her taking to 10-15 dudes at one time in her phone. She lied even tho it was right in front of my face. She proceeds to blame me because I posted a picture on social media and she hates it when I do that. I guess I felt like it wasn’t a big deal to post on social media but she feels I do it for attention or to get girls. She said It was her way to feel better and get me back. Ever since then I’ve had a hard time letting it go. I know I should but she has started to just freak out. She doesn’t want me to hang with my friends because a girl was hitting on me in front of her. Now she doesn’t want me going out. She’ll at times just go off the wall with accusations and nothing I can or say can make her stop. She says the most awful things to me that makes me hurt so bad. She constantly reminds me of how easy it is for her to leave me. She’ll apologize for it but then do it again hours later. It’s became so toxic yet I still can’t find it in myself to end it. Like I forgot how bad it feels going through a break up. I want to be with her and all I ask her to do is to stop saying hurtful things when she goes on a rant. Then she acts like I’m crazy for saying something about it because of the cheating thing. I constantly pay for that and It’s always me trying to make it work. I’m just so sick of being hurt. I feel exhausted and mentally gone. We will break up but by this time tomorrow I would have apologized and tried to fix things but I’m just so tired of fighting. I hope it changes, but I doubt it is. I cannot bring myself to let it go. Overall I love her and I try to make her happy but she’s forgotten I’m a human being and at times can be so nice then treat me like a dog. I don’t know what to do. I’m stuck. I’m constantly stressed and hurt. I know I’ve made mistakes but I have been a caring bf. Just Idk how much longer my brain can take this. I want to leave but cannot find the strength to do it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MissCanuck Posted December 2, 2020 Share Posted December 2, 2020 Your relationship is dead in the water. There’s way too much anger and resentment for this to work out. It’s time to walk away so you can both find partners better-suited for each of you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
poorlittlefish Posted December 2, 2020 Share Posted December 2, 2020 The relationship was killed when you cheated. Many partners cannot forgive or forget and your girlfriend is definitely one of them. She seems to feel that she has a pass for inappropriate behaviour from what you did to her. Time to break up before things turn even more ugly. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wiseman2 Posted December 2, 2020 Share Posted December 2, 2020 Set yourself free from all this. It's just not working out. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
boltnrun Posted December 2, 2020 Share Posted December 2, 2020 This relationship sounds absolutely awful. I wouldn't stay, but maybe you think all this conflict is a sign of "love" or "passion". Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
melancholy123 Posted December 2, 2020 Share Posted December 2, 2020 Time to let this go. This is not love, she's angry and hostile and why on earth do you want someone like that in your life? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rose Mosse Posted December 2, 2020 Share Posted December 2, 2020 Yesterday's tomorrow is today. Did you break up or apologize again? And why did you cheat? The reason I ask is because you both were missing parts of your relationship long before it got to this point... It's painful but you can go over and look over why it got to that point too. Also, no appropriate boundaries, misuse/abuse of social media, lack of trust, disrespect towards each other... all reasons to rethink this. The relationship was missing a lot back then and you were both in denial then too. You're hurting each other staying together, seeing each other as sub- or less-than-human. There's a so much resentment it's difficult to think of caring for another person. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HeartGoesOn Posted December 2, 2020 Share Posted December 2, 2020 Once cheating enters the picture, the chances of going forward are slim to none. She's obviously in a lot of pain, and rightly so. However, by attempting to even the score and/or place you on a leash, she's fighting a losing battle. After making the choice to cheat, it's time for you to make an even bigger choice by walking away. I'm sure her feelings will be far less hurtful than staying on board, and trying to win the race...so to speak. Keep in mind that cheating always comes with a price to pay. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Capricorn3 Posted December 2, 2020 Share Posted December 2, 2020 That's what happens when one cheats. It breaks relationships. Do BOTH of you a big favor and end it already and hopefully you'll learn from all of this. I want to leave but cannot find the strength to do it. That's a feeble excuse. Is it because you don't want to look like the bad guy? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
boltnrun Posted December 2, 2020 Share Posted December 2, 2020 Do you feel you deserve the treatment she's giving you because you cheated? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
goddess Posted December 3, 2020 Share Posted December 3, 2020 Oh, come on, let's get real here, Austino! She's controlling, verbally and emotionally abusive, and she threatened you >> "She constantly reminds me of how easy it is for her to leave me." Why on earth do you put up with this drama? Yes, I know, you love her. That's not a reason to stay. What you have is a very toxic relationship. You cheated, and I don't condone that, BUT you cheated for a reason. Was it because someone treated you with respect and it made you feel wanted? Whatever the reason, you were unhappy, bottom line. She carries on like this but you have the power to get out of it. Unless, you enjoy being in this very unhealthy relationship. Do you think it's going to get better? Of course not. Only a year into it and this is what's happened? Do yourself, and her, a favour and leave. It's not really hard to do. You have no obligation to stay tied down living this miserable existence. I would advise you to be kind but firm and leave her. I guarantee you that you will feel a lot better. And, you will re-claim your self-respect. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hollyj Posted December 3, 2020 Share Posted December 3, 2020 Why did you cheat? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Spawn Posted December 3, 2020 Share Posted December 3, 2020 You showed her you dont respect her and the relationship why would you expect her to respect you and the relationship. i think you should take some time off from all this and first understand why you want a relationship to begin with. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
goddess Posted December 4, 2020 Share Posted December 4, 2020 Are you planning on answering any of us? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
smackie9 Posted December 4, 2020 Share Posted December 4, 2020 It's time to let go....a relationship cannot continue unless there is total forgiveness. There is no forgiveness. She continues to punish you for hurting her so that means she's not over it, and may never will be. She want you to feel the pain you had put her through. That's a relationship ender. You will never have what was back. This is karma biting you in the butt. Don't cheat if the stakes are this high. Learn, grow, move on. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
catfeeder Posted December 5, 2020 Share Posted December 5, 2020 I feel like I cannot breath in my relationship. My girlfriend ... caught me cheating 4 months ago. What kind of neon sign do you need in order to know that this isn't the right relationship for you? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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