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Everything posted by Capricorn3

  1. This girl is messing with you and playing games. I would give this one a wide berth and head for the hills.
  2. The way I see it is that yes, maybe he is "suffering" and feeling low but THAT is not what has caused the resentment she feels. Resentment comes from the fact that he feels because he is feeling low he can take out his anger and misery on her to the point she can't stand living with him anymore and to the point of possible divorce. Being depressed should never be a reason to emotionally abuse your partner (imo). Secondly, and (to me) a far stronger reason is the fact that he refuses to help himself. He refuses therapy. He refuses marriages counselling to help save his marriage etc etc. She has every right to feel the way she does and I have no doubt she would be very willing to try and save their marriage if only he would show a willingness to seek professional counseling/therapy. Personally, I think they are incompatible and that this relationship will never work. Then add to that the fact that he doesn't care to help himself ..... is a recipe for disaster and the relationship is doomed. The ball is in HIS court.
  3. ^ Just wanted to say that you did the right thing there. Please, please, whatever you do, do not start a family with him until all of these issues have been sorted. A child deserves a stable, secure and healthy environment, but right now, that's not happening. No babies until he gets professional help.
  4. NO. No. No. Not jewelry. No. I would never accept jewelry from a guy I work with and am not dating. No. Perhaps get her a book that you know she likes and leave it at that.
  5. OP, I am not sure why you need to keep starting new threads asking about the same things over and over? All your threads are about the same situation. You get good advice (to which you never respond) but you don't really seem to read anything, because not long after, you come back again with the same thing. What's the point? Sincere question. What exactly are you looking for if you have no intention of leaving a bad situation? You either end this toxic "relationship", or you stay. But if you choose to stay, then you can't keep complaining about it and always saying "I don't know what to do!!!" You have choices. So far your choice has been to stay with him. Only YOU can change that.
  6. ^ I second this post. He's too self-absorbed to care about how you feel and this will NOT magically go away. It will get worse. What you see is what you get. You now need to decide if you want to continue living the rest of your life like this, or if you want to live a life free of abuse, anger, control and resentment. Choice is yours. Personally, I would serve him with divorce papers so fast he won't know what hit him, but that's just me.
  7. Oh I totally agree with the above.
  8. ^ I know plenty couples like that. LOTS, lol. I have a very good friend who moved in with her boyfriend 28 years ago. Not married and no children and they are one of the happiest couples I know. It works for a lot of people.
  9. Me thinks the guy is married or in a relationship and while the wife or gf was out he went online to find some excitement and fun. Could be wrong of course but that's what my gut tells me. One week. You don't even know this guy. Let it go and move on. Not worth losing any sleep over it.
  10. This is yet another reminder of all that is wrong in this world. Total lack of morals, values, ethics, respect and integrity etc. All about selfishness, self-satisfaction. No shame. Here's an idea: how about showing you have a little self-respect and don't go after girls already in a relationship? I am assuming you DO at least have some self-respect, right?
  11. ^ Ditto!! You must be my long lost identical twin. 😊
  12. I think this covers it well. Simple and to the point. No need to overthink and over analyze and let the imagination get away with you.
  13. I think you're getting way ahead of yourself here. I am struggling to figure out how you came to the idea that maybe he wants to date you ...... and then jumping to men being self-centred? It sounds more like a lonely old man who wanted to chat. Harmless human interaction in these very trying times we are living in.
  14. I could be wrong but I knew someone a long time ago who went to AA and asking each other for their phone number seemed to be the norm - it apparently was part of the support system so members could support and help each other out. Nothing more than that. Nothing sinister. Not sure why it would be viewed as such a shocking thing to do.
  15. ^ THIS. Jibralta, just have to say - brilliant post! Nailed it. 10 rep points to you.
  16. Wow, after reading this thread it just reminds me again why I hate parties, hens, weddings etc etc. All the crap that goes with it and all the drama, no thanks, lol. I much prefer to order a pizza, sit in front of the fire and watch a comedy .... in my happy little semi reclusive world. 😄 Tiny, just tell them sorry, something has come up in the family and you are unable to help out.
  17. Mass hysteria gone mad. What ever happened to good old fashioned common sense?
  18. NO. You need to let this go and move on. He has a girlfriend now and that's your cue to leave it be. No apologies necessary.
  19. OP, you posted the identical story almost a year ago. You got great advice then but chose to ignore it all. Nothing has changed - in fact it sounds even worse. What exactly are you looking for now? 😕
  20. Is this the same girl who didn't put her lunch next to yours in the fridge? You know for a fact that she had a crush on you? or are you just assuming/guessing? IF, and it's a big IF she had a crush on you, you said you weren't interested in her, so she moved on. Now you ask her out and you can't understand why she turned you down? You weren't interested in her and she's not interested in you either (if she ever was). I agree with LaHermes: .... "There may well be "new opportunities" in those places. But that will be of little use if you do not change your behaviour, address your anger issues, and remove that massive chip on your shoulder. You are destined to failure if you do not deal with these aspects FIRST." Address all your issues first if you want to be successful in finding a partner and relationship.
  21. ^ I think THIS is key. It seems so many people believe that in order to have a good time you need to get plastered. Not so. As a teetotalar I always seem to have the most fun at any social gathering/party, lol. I also agree with the other posters who have mentioned that it's a good idea to get the anxiety and depression sorted out first and then as you get mentally healthier your need for drink should hopefully ease off and with professional help you should be able to manage it. Godd luck. I wish you well.
  22. For all the reasons outlined in "lostandhurt's" brilliant post on page 1. Go have another read.
  23. Ouch. (That looks just like "radiation burn" I've had recently, but clearly that's not it). Hopefully you get some answers from your doctor.
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