jillyy9 Posted January 27, 2019 Author Share Posted January 27, 2019 Seriously? what exactly did the letter say to make you think that? This is all in your head. And i am sure the photo was not provocative in nature. you know, it used to be standard to send updated photos of yourself or the kids n letters. I would loosen up, either tell your husband that you have received a nice note from the kid wondering how the farm was doing or don't mention it and simply reply back like how i told you to do. I did mention that we were hardly "good friends", that's why. Hardly more than an aquaintance, so why is he so eager to show me his pic now? Link to comment
SherrySher Posted January 27, 2019 Share Posted January 27, 2019 Jilly, why are you so badly wanting this to be him showing interest? I did ask this before and you ignored it, but is your marriage not interesting to you anymore? What would you get out of a young guy "hitting" on you? Link to comment
pippy longstocking Posted January 27, 2019 Share Posted January 27, 2019 Jilly, why are you so badly wanting this to be him showing interest? I did ask this before and you ignored it, but is your marriage not interesting to you anymore? What would you get out of a young guy "hitting" on you? Yeah it does sound like you want this to be something more ...maybe he sent a selfie to remind you of who he was , presuming you get loads of people and may not recall him and his family . Link to comment
Capricorn3 Posted January 27, 2019 Share Posted January 27, 2019 I'm just thinking what I would have done in the same scenario: I receive the letter, read it and then pass it onto my husband and ask him "what do you think of this!?" and leave it at that. If we rent out cottages on the farm, any letter I receive is BOTH our business, imo. I get a strong impression you're enjoying this attention, an ego boost, and want to reply to him privately without your husband's knowledge. Therein lies the problem. I could be wrong of course. All of this is really much ado about nothing and easily solved. Received letter. Show husband. End of. Link to comment
jillyy9 Posted January 27, 2019 Author Share Posted January 27, 2019 He opened the letter by calling me my first name "Dear Jiily" and signed it off with his first name. Link to comment
Jibralta Posted January 27, 2019 Share Posted January 27, 2019 Don't you think it's sort of odd for a 20-something guy to send a letter with a photograph? Are you sure it's really from him? Maybe it's a prank from an elderly acquaintance. Link to comment
mustlovedogs Posted January 27, 2019 Share Posted January 27, 2019 He opened the letter by calling me my first name "Dear Jiily" and signed it off with his first name. Sounds like a normal letter to me Link to comment
Capricorn3 Posted January 27, 2019 Share Posted January 27, 2019 He opened the letter by calling me my first name "Dear Jiily" and signed it off with his first name. Who cares! Seriously. Just show your husband and say "Look what I received today" (or whenever). Why are you hiding the fact that you received this letter? Serious question. Link to comment
LC8328 Posted January 27, 2019 Share Posted January 27, 2019 Yeah it does sound like you want this to be something more ...maybe he sent a selfie to remind you of who he was , presuming you get loads of people and may not recall him and his family . This is exactly it. I'm guessing he was raised properly -with manners. For example, maybe after staying at a friend's house he might fold up his bedsheets and leave them at the foot of the bed. Or if he stayed over the weekend at a friend's house, he might cook dinner once. People like this are the types that others say, "Oh, he's such a nice guy." Etc. Not everyone acts this way, but they make the world a little nicer for the rest of us. As Pippy indicated, he wanted to remind you of 'who' he was so you would see the pic and think, "Ok, I know who that is," so you can match face to name. If you honestly didn't care you would have said 'oh that's nice,' told your husband, and put it aside. I think you hope that he has other intentions and you desire confirmation from us. It's none of my business, but I suggest you put that energy into your marriage. Link to comment
LC8328 Posted January 27, 2019 Share Posted January 27, 2019 Recently I received a letter from a guy who stayed on our farm a few years ago. I just re-read this part. This explains a lot. He stayed there a few years ago. That's a long time ago, considering all the people you may have seen during that time. Confirms Pippy's idea that he was reminding you of who he is. Honestly, I am guessing he or his parents desire to stay at your farm in the near future, so he's reaching out to his contact -you. Link to comment
boltnrun Posted January 27, 2019 Share Posted January 27, 2019 Since you refuse to answer the question of why you haven't told your husband, I have to speculate it's because you are hoping the letter is an "advance" and you haven't yet decided if you're going to respond positively and/or encouragingly. Accurate? Link to comment
lostandhurt Posted January 28, 2019 Share Posted January 28, 2019 Male perspective here: I seriously doubt he was staying in touch with the owner of the farm so he or his family could stay there again. If that was true he would have addressed it to you AND your husband. He is a 20 something male and all us guys know what men this age think about 23 1/2 hours a day. Show your husband the letter, have a good laugh and privately fantasize about the young man. Interesting how different the perspectives are between the different sexes. Lost Link to comment
SherrySher Posted January 28, 2019 Share Posted January 28, 2019 I disagree. I still say this guy was just saying a hello. My grandmother ran a boarding house at one time when she was younger (in her early 40's), and had all sort of young men come through. Quite a few got a hold of her years later to see how she was. Each and every one of them seen her as a mother type and wanted to thank her for being kind to them. That was it, nothing more to it. I can't see my grandmother ever misinterpreting that, she'd find it absolutely ridiculous! I'm also trying to put myself into a 20 something males mind. First of all, he knows there is a husband, I can't see him being stupid enough to send a letter in hopes of something romantic. No doubt he would have considered the consequences. I don't know, it just all sounds like a fantasy OP has made up. I still don't understand why she's not letting her husband know about the letter. But to each their own, as Wiseman said enjoy your fantasy. Link to comment
MissCanuck Posted January 28, 2019 Share Posted January 28, 2019 OP, the better question is: Why do you want it to be a come-on? Because it's clear from your posts that this is what you hope. Link to comment
nutbrownhare Posted January 28, 2019 Share Posted January 28, 2019 I wouldn't read too much into him sending a selfie, either. Young people take loads and loads of pics of themselves, mainly because it's so much easier with phones, and sending them is not really a big deal. From time to time I get messages from former students of mine, reminiscing about old times and saying thank you, and I don't think for a minute that it's anything more than saying 'Hi!' Link to comment
catfeeder Posted January 29, 2019 Share Posted January 29, 2019 I would be creeped out, and I'd let my husband reply kindly for the both of us. Link to comment
Wiseman2 Posted January 29, 2019 Share Posted January 29, 2019 Yes, exactly. There is nothing about his contact that is creepy or flirty or unseemly. It sounds like a staying in touch type thing. Perhaps he wants to rent again in the future with his age appropriate gf. Maybe just seeing if you are still operating the rental end of things. It seems you are self conscious about your age, level of attractiveness and strangely hope showing this innocuous communication to your husband under the pretense that it's a come on will spur his interest in you. Reply to any communication addressed to you by yourself an an appropriate professional way. Your husband is not your daddy who has to protect you from imaginary wolves.I wouldn't read too much into him sending a selfie, either. Young people take loads and loads of pics of themselves, mainly because it's so much easier with phones, and sending them is not really a big deal. From time to time I get messages from former students of mine, reminiscing about old times and saying thank you, and I don't think for a minute that it's anything more than saying 'Hi!' Link to comment
Metaltwin70 Posted January 29, 2019 Share Posted January 29, 2019 ' What would you get out of a young guy "hitting" on you?' Ha. Indeed, what on earth would a long-term partnered middle aged woman get out of a young good looking bloke hitting on her.. Link to comment
jillyy9 Posted January 29, 2019 Author Share Posted January 29, 2019 ' What would you get out of a young guy "hitting" on you?' Ha. Indeed, what on earth would a long-term partnered middle aged woman get out of a young good looking bloke hitting on her.. I know what I got.... Link to comment
Capricorn3 Posted January 30, 2019 Share Posted January 30, 2019 I know what I got.... hmmmm.........this doesn't sound like someone who intends showing their husband the letter. You've made it pretty clear what your intentions are now. Link to comment
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