Would you date a vegan?

[boltnrun]

Like... (Obviously I would not be this rude... but just giving you the idea of how MANY of my married evenings went, and the massive PITA it was):

 

Ex Says: "I am hungry..."

I say: "Okay, then eat"

Ex Says: "There is nothing to eat"

I say: "Here is some bread + there are some eggs in the fridge - fry the eggs, put it in the bread - grab a glass of milk - eat"

Ex Says: "You know that I can't eat bread...."

I say: "Eat the eggs then and drink some milk"

Ex: "I want a meal, not just eggs and milk"

I say: "Here are the car keys, go get some food"

Ex: "But I am hungry and tired - you obviously don't care about me... if you were a good husband you would provide for your wife and not leave her starving"...

 

I think: "FML"

 

So yeah...

 

That's not a food issue, that's an attitude issue.

[Krankor]

No. I have been with someone that had a food intolerance and also an allergy, and all sorts of hangups with food. I am done worrying about it.

 

I eat healthy, I eat well, and sometimes I like to eat my junk (pizza and w/e else) and I like to be with someone that is like minded - will eat healthy 80% of the time, but is cool to eat an ice cream with Baileys now and then...

I would "cheat" here and there and have that pizza or cheeseburger or whatever if I felt like I could get away with it. The problem with me though is that I don't do moderation well. Whenever I've cheated in the past I've ended up getting derailed for days.

[dias]

That's not a food issue, that's an attitude issue.

 

This is what I thought too.

[sfindependent]

If you can believe it I've put on muscle eating a macro ratio of about 80% carbs, 12% protein, and 8% fat.

 

The one thing I have to watch out for is thay I can start lecturing people and being kind of a know-it-all about how to eat healthy, knowing full well how annoying I'm being. That would probably drive potential girlfriends away.

 

 

i dated a vegan and she believed everything caused cancer. Meat causes cancer. she believed half the things i did and ate were not good. Granted I do have some bad habits, but the consistent "know it better" and "it's absolute" kind of made me feel resentful towards her. Bless her heart, she was trying to be nice and looked out for my health and all that... but the way it was communicated and her firm belief as if it were the only answer. OH and there was a lot of "i feel ill because of this" that i feel half the time, were psychosomatic. For some reason tho, I end up meeting 60% vegans or vegetarians. I don;t know why.,

 

On the one side, i do understand why they're always talking about veganism and what they do etc etc etc. I've recently joined a health club and am doing a lot of health related activities and i could not stop talking about it with my friends. It'sbecuase i have to constantly remind myself what i'm doing... like a reinforcement of sorts.

 

but yes. if you ever date a vegan or plan to date anyone with a restricted diet, ask them how they handled previous relationships who had a different diet than theirs. might help.

[sfindependent]

In my case I always have plenty of food to eat. I batch cook and freeze stuff like bean soup, chili, mashed sweet potatoes, etc. Otherwise I just boil some potatoes or make whole wheat pasta. So that wouldn't be an issue. Going out to eat would be more difficult though.

 

It sounds more like your ex had an issue with her personality than her diet.

 

Sorry, i understand doing sweet things for your partners, but i don't feel that i need to be guilted into doing things my partner can obviously do for herself. Not in this lifetime. it makes me NOT want to do anything.

[mines]

I eat mostly plant-based, and I'm an endurance athlete. My daughters are both vegan. I started eating mostly plant-based after they went vegan, due to humane concerns. I still add salmon and turkey to my diet and occasionally humane-raised grass fed beef. I have had my strongest running cycle in several years after going mostly plant-based. I can find something to eat, no matter where I go. I would date a guy with any type of eating restriction (or none) if I liked him/was interested. Food choices for me, are not a deal breaker!

[mustlovedogs]

I personally would rather not date someone on a restrictive diet.

 

My best friend is a vegan. I love her to death. But she has been encouraging (forcing?) her husband to come closer and closer to her diet. As more time goes on, she finds it disrespectful for him to not be a vegan.

 

Watching their relationship progress this way makes me wary of knowingly entering a relationship like that.

[journeynow]

I'd be fine with it. Many folks I know are on some sort of limited diet for health reasons or food sensitivities, or are vegan or paleo by choice, and it's not really a big issue if we go out to eat. Maybe it's the are I live in, but there are always options on the menu. The attitude a person has toward food may be more of an issue, when it comes to lecturing or making a big deal about food in a way that impacts those around them.

[DancingFool]

In my case I always have plenty of food to eat. I batch cook and freeze stuff like bean soup, chili, mashed sweet potatoes, etc. Otherwise I just boil some potatoes or make whole wheat pasta. So that wouldn't be an issue. Going out to eat would be more difficult though.

 

It sounds more like your ex had an issue with her personality than her diet.

 

That's all great Krankor and since you are willing to eat some variety sometimes, doesn't sound like you are that limited really. One thing to consider is, suppose she wants to make a beef stew and the who house is full of that aroma..... It's actually that kind of every day cooking stuff that can get challenging even without the attitudes. Either the omnivore is restricting their diet to match yours, which will turn to resentment at some point, or you are cooking two separate meals. Like or not, it does get old with time. That's why I'm saying that it might be better to look for someone who is at least similar to your own diet. Some people quite naturally prefer veggies and pasta over meat. Like they just won't miss a steak if it disappeared tomorrow. That might be your better option without even needing to proclaim labels on what exactly their diet is.

[thealchemist]

I have no issue with other's diets. It is an issue of people trying to get me to change to their diet. Or for their own peace of mind (I guess?) they want to tell me how better their diet is.

 

Eat what you want just s t f u about it. It seems like it is more important for people to inform others of their diet than actually eating that diet.

 

I am not implying this is you Krank, just a common issue I see.

 

I get a lot of people criticizing my diet. I kill and process the bulk of my meat myself. Grow a good chunk of the veggies too. So my diet is like 30% meat, 30% veggie, 30% fruit, and 10% other.

 

I work with a lot of vegans/vegetarians who are judgmental about my meat consumption.

 

I got two deer over the weekend too. More meat for the deep freeze.

[Pleasedonot5]

I wouldn't date a political vegan, or one who would want me to change my diet on principle. That sounds...stressful lol. I like my steak and burgers.

 

However tough it might be to accommodate a partner with vegan dietary restrictions, as long as we can still eat at places and functions - should the connection be good enough, that would be no problem for me.

[Jibralta]

So, my question is: would you date someone with such a narrow diet?

 

If I really liked them, it wouldn't be an issue. As with anything else, there are positives and negatives. On the positive side of things, their diet would probably influence my own eating habits. On the negative side of things, we would only be able to enjoy a limited amount of food together. That would kinda suck because one of my favorite things is sharing a meal with others, even better if it's my boyfriend. I dated a bodybuilder a couple of years ago, and it was a little frustrating for that reason. But not a deal breaker.

[itsallgrand]

I have no issue with other's diets. It is an issue of people trying to get me to change to their diet. Or for their own peace of mind (I guess?) they want to tell me how better their diet is.

 

Eat what you want just s t f u about it. It seems like it is more important for people to inform others of their diet than actually eating that diet.

 

I am not implying this is you Krank, just a common issue I see.

 

I get a lot of people criticizing my diet. I kill and process the bulk of my meat myself. Grow a good chunk of the veggies too. So my diet is like 30% meat, 30% veggie, 30% fruit, and 10% other.

 

I work with a lot of vegans/vegetarians who are judgmental about my meat consumption.

 

I got two deer over the weekend too. More meat for the deep freeze.

 

Most of the meat I eat is 'wild', as well. It's more in line with my personal ethics than buying farm raised in a supermarket.

 

Like I said earlier, im with someone who eats a vegan diet, but we have shared ideas about food. We both are eaters. We both believe in respect for whatever food you are eating, not wasting, attempting to respect the balance of nature. Knowing where food comes from, being able to somewhat feed yourself, and a general practical interest in food and diet.

 

No real point except I respect your way and find it strange someone would critize you for it. You have an intimate relationship to your food - that's always good.

[journeynow]

This post has me thinking. This issue can be a bit like beliefs about spirituality, politics, child rearing, money, our role in society, etc. It might be great if we mesh completely with another person we are attracted to, but in reality there will be areas where we differ, and the degree and attitude we differ can impact how we do as a couple. On the other hand, these areas aren't always cast in stone. We grow and change and evolve throughout our lives, and part of the benefit of being with someone who differs in some areas is that we grow in understanding and perspective by listening to and respecting them. Differences can be challenging, or interesting, or simply a characteristic that is part of the whole.

[Krankor]

That's all great Krankor and since you are willing to eat some variety sometimes, doesn't sound like you are that limited really. One thing to consider is, suppose she wants to make a beef stew and the who house is full of that aroma..... It's actually that kind of every day cooking stuff that can get challenging even without the attitudes. Either the omnivore is restricting their diet to match yours, which will turn to resentment at some point, or you are cooking two separate meals. Like or not, it does get old with time. That's why I'm saying that it might be better to look for someone who is at least similar to your own diet. Some people quite naturally prefer veggies and pasta over meat. Like they just won't miss a steak if it disappeared tomorrow. That might be your better option without even needing to proclaim labels on what exactly their diet is.

I definitely see your point. I did give some thought to the beef stew thing. I can't promise that there wouldn't be a small part of me thinking "Geez, does she HAVE to cook that kind of stuff? Come on." Of course, that would be entirely unfair after knowingly getting into a relationship with an omni. I also can't promise that there wouldn't be the occasional annoying lecture from me, despite trying not to do that. And separate meals could be a pain, and also even subtley make things feel a little less close.

 

However, there are no guarantees. People change. You could get into a relationship with a fellow omni, then a couple of years in he watches "What The Health" or "Forks Over Knives" on Netflix and decides to go vegan. What then? Do you dump him because you didn't sign on for that? I mean, I imagine if all else is good you'd figure out how to make it work, especially of he agrees not to try to convince you to change and follows through on that.

 

Or I could get into a relationship with another starch-based eater, then one day one of us decides "You know what? Forget this, I'm going back to eating meat." We'd be facing the same situation.

[pippy longstocking]

If you are really going the full hog it is not just food as well ..although krankor I think you are doing this for health reason yes ? not animal rights ?

 

So like for my daughter , her reason is animals ...so I have to also check there is no leather in things I buy her , then you get into the cosmetics that where tested on animals etc etc as I am saying this I am wondering what her stance on wool is ..cos she wont have honey .

 

I think veganism from a none vegan ( me) has been tricky at first , but I want to support her choices .

 

It doesn't affect our relationship as mother and daughter , I know you are talking about couples , but just adding my bit ..I hate cooking , the kitchen is where my lap top and marley tray live and I eat to survive haha that is all ...so it hasn't messed our status quo up .

[pippy longstocking]

ahhh full hog ...did you see what I did there

[Krankor]

If you are really going the full hog it is not just food as well ..although krankor I think you are doing this for health reason yes ? not animal rights ?

 

So like for my daughter , her reason is animals ...so I have to also check there is no leather in things I buy her , then you get into the cosmetics that where tested on animals etc etc as I am saying this I am wondering what her stance on wool is ..cos she wont have honey .

 

I think veganism from a none vegan ( me) has been tricky at first , but I want to support her choices .

 

It doesn't affect our relationship as mother and daughter , I know you are talking about couples , but just adding my bit ..I hate cooking , the kitchen is where my lap top and marley tray live and I eat to survive haha that is all ...so it hasn't messed our status quo up .

Yes, it's the health thing. That's why if you want to be technical I'm a plant-based eater, not a vegan. Having said that, I do think factory farming is pretty cruel and bad for the environment and I'm glad to not be supporting that, even to the point of avoiding leather for the most part. Now, having said THAT, I don't have a problem with hunting and fishing or eating meat. I live in Minnesota and outside the Twin Cities pretty much everyone hunts and fishes. I used to hunt some myself and I still like to fish, although it's all catch and release these days. I mean, humans are well adapted to hunting, although I would argue that we aren't actually all that well adapted to eating meat. The research now shows that it was cooked starches, not meat, that gave us our large brains. Our saliva is full of amalyse which is used to digest starch. We are primarily starchivores. That is the ideal human fuel; whole grains and starchy tubers. Our ancestors utilized meat as a way to survive but it is rough, dirty fuel for humans, and we can see that it causes problems as we age in any kind of large amounts.

 

You see what I mean? This is the sort of thing I have to watch out for because I will totally go on this spiel on a first date if I'm not careful.

[pippy longstocking]

HAHAHAH awww I found it interesting but I hear what you're saying , and it would be nice for you to find someone who shares this passion or at least respects if not shares .

[thealchemist]

Well I do like supporting my children's food choices. My daughter is almost 3 and she wants to know where all her food comes from. Her grandparents raise chickens, goats, hogs, rabbits and some cattle.

 

She has already been to a culling with the chickens. She has also helped process a hog. She really understands where it comes from. She also asks me where stuff from the supermarket comes from.

 

I really don't like eating meat that was mass produced. I feel a lot more responsible killing and processing myself.

 

She also has started setting trot lines and searching with me to.

 

As long as she knows that any animal she eats had to be killed somewhere by someone I am fine. One of her daycare friend's mothers thought what we did was inhumane and asked me why we didn't buy our meat in the supermarket where no animals had to be hurt...

 

My daughter asked me later why she was so silly. Because all meat is dead animal.

[Sportster2005]

I probably wouldn't. It's a major incompatibility. It's just not eating out. It's eating at home, and making meals for one another. It's just impractical.

[AtitAgain]

Yes, it's the health thing. That's why if you want to be technical I'm a plant-based eater, not a vegan. Having said that, I do think factory farming is pretty cruel and bad for the environment and I'm glad to not be supporting that, even to the point of avoiding leather for the most part. Now, having said THAT, I don't have a problem with hunting and fishing or eating meat. I live in Minnesota and outside the Twin Cities pretty much everyone hunts and fishes. I used to hunt some myself and I still like to fish, although it's all catch and release these days. I mean, humans are well adapted to hunting, although I would argue that we aren't actually all that well adapted to eating meat. The research now shows that it was cooked starches, not meat, that gave us our large brains. Our saliva is full of amalyse which is used to digest starch. We are primarily starchivores. That is the ideal human fuel; whole grains and starchy tubers. Our ancestors utilized meat as a way to survive but it is rough, dirty fuel for humans, and we can see that it causes problems as we age in any kind of large amounts.

 

You see what I mean? This is the sort of thing I have to watch out for because I will totally go on this spiel on a first date if I'm not careful.

 

Not to get on a pissing match or anything.... but there are people that follow other diets in a perfectly healthy manner... keto diet, paleo diet, "eat what your greatgrandma cooked" diet, "Kale + Kale" Diet, "Space minerals and star dust" diet... I really don't get the point of being so dogmatic about it. Research from what I have seen says different things for different people depending on who did the research.

 

The one thing I have seen consistently across the board is that processed foods + a diet heavy on refined sugar is awful for you. But so long as you are eating real foods, have balanced macro and micro nutrients, eat a reasonable amount of calories that matches your needs, exercise (cardio + Weightlifting), you will be fine...

[DancingFool]

Yes, it's the health thing. That's why if you want to be technical I'm a plant-based eater, not a vegan. Having said that, I do think factory farming is pretty cruel and bad for the environment and I'm glad to not be supporting that, even to the point of avoiding leather for the most part. Now, having said THAT, I don't have a problem with hunting and fishing or eating meat. I live in Minnesota and outside the Twin Cities pretty much everyone hunts and fishes. I used to hunt some myself and I still like to fish, although it's all catch and release these days. I mean, humans are well adapted to hunting, although I would argue that we aren't actually all that well adapted to eating meat. The research now shows that it was cooked starches, not meat, that gave us our large brains. Our saliva is full of amalyse which is used to digest starch. We are primarily starchivores. That is the ideal human fuel; whole grains and starchy tubers. Our ancestors utilized meat as a way to survive but it is rough, dirty fuel for humans, and we can see that it causes problems as we age in any kind of large amounts.

 

You see what I mean? This is the sort of thing I have to watch out for because I will totally go on this spiel on a first date if I'm not careful.

 

Oooohhhh...boooyyyy.... And this is why you need to date someone who is at least similar to what you eat. Yeah, yeah sure people can change, but you know what? Why set up a relationship for contention and failure right off the bat. Much easier to deal with changes in a long standing relationship than start out already butting heads.

 

I really don't even see your dilemma to be honest, because there are so many people who quite naturally will have a similar diet, even if not as restricted as your own. I mean if she says that her favorite food is steak, just move on to other matches. You really aren't limiting your pool of dates that much. You aren't looking for 100 women, you are looking for just one right one, remember? A meat lover isn't right for you. No need to over complicate this.

 

Btw, there is absolutely no one size fits all miracle be all end all diet. People's individual body chemistry needs are too varied for that. What's good for one is not good for another and will make a third one sick and so on.

[dias]

.I hate cooking , the kitchen is where my lap top and marley tray live and I eat to survive .

And i thought I was the only one like that haha

 

I believe that it's not a major incompatibility problem as long as both partners don't try to impose their eating habits on each other.

 

Maybe it's because I grew up in a household where everyone ate different things and at different hours. As for the practical aspect, if someone is hungry he goes to the supermarket and makes this own meal. Is this so difficult.....?

[pippy longstocking]

And i thought I was the only one like that haha

 

I believe that it's not a major incompatibility problem as long as both partners don't try to impose their eating habits on each other.

 

Maybe it's because I grew up in a household where everyone ate different things and at different hours. As for the practical aspect, if someone is hungry he goes to the supermarket and makes this own meal. Is this so difficult.....?

 

I have had people over the years say to me ...I have an easy recipe blah blah blah and I am like ...you're not listening ..I don't like to cook ..the end ...hahah arghhhhhh