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Everything posted by itsallgrand

  1. Yes, that one! And no, I love most history, so I'm totally going to add that book to my list. I used to read mostly fiction, and now it's the other way around. I still love a good story though. There's something so soothing about getting engrossed in a good story.
  2. Yes, I just don't want to hear about them anymore. That broadcaster was brutal lol.
  3. No, but I see I can listen to podcasts and it looks awesome!! Thanks!!
  4. Jib, it has been dangerous... I had to switch to a whole foods diet to lose the few pounds I picked up during my rediscovery of butter lol. That 1493 book sounds right up my alley!! I'll check it out. There is this book called "Sugar" that I've reread several times. It's what started my collection of books dedicated to one ingredient history. It's gruesome, but a good important read. I've come across the Townsends videos a few times, comes up in my feed now lol. Some of the recipes are super interesting! It's neat seeing someone doing what he's doing. Thanks for this!
  5. I think it's quite common, especially when first starting out dating as a young woman. There's so much attention and pressure put on us so quickly, and it can be a lot. This time right now is for you to figure all this out. Take your time. Have fun. And when someone pressures you, practise your assertiveness. It'll serve you well. No one has a special right to date you because "they really, really want to". You date who you want. 🙂
  6. I don't like that he begged and begged after you said no, until you gave in. That's another red flag. You are 20. The world is your oyster, and all kinds of men are going to want to date you. Some are going to be pushy about it, and unfortunately as a young woman you are faced with learning to put up strong boundaries fast. Otherwise pushy guys are going to take advantage of you, worming their way in because you are trying to be "nice". There's nothing nice nor respectful about pushy. And he doesn't take care of himself. Don't settle.
  7. I've never read either of those classics. I'm almost embarrassed to say that! I should give them a go! I've been infatuated with cook books since the first lockdown. I'm fascinated with the different ways different people approach food and ingredients. And I love anything food history. I've been on a kick of trying older recipes, ancestors of modern dishes. Jib, if you are still craving eggs, try a French omelette!
  8. I'd have a ball seeing the treasures in your house! It sounds like this baby is a rumbunctious one already lol. I hope you get some sleep though.
  9. I don't think anyone should worry about "the good ones getting snapped up early". Not everyone takes a linear path. There's no failure in not settling down early or in not being in a certain stage in your life at a certain time. I don't think it makes someone any less "a good one". It's just finding the right match for where you are at and who you are.
  10. When I was dating in my 30s, I came across SO MANY men who were looking for marriage and kids, but then again this was dating in the prairies lol. I wasn't looking for a relationship with marriage and kids as a goal though. I was looking for something that could lead to a real partnership, it's just marriage wasn't the priority for me and it didn't matter to me if that partnership ever included marriage. There all kinds out there. I really think the hardest part is getting out of one's own way enough to find the people who share your values at that very foundational level. Us human
  11. Right?! We just had frost last week and now this week is a weather advisory for extreme heat.
  12. Yesterday, the SO and I were disagreeing about something and it got a little bit heated. Then he says "Cite your sources!" and I started laughing and next thing you know, we are belly laughing. It's become a sort of shorthand now for diffusing a disagreement when it gets a bit too hot, as our most epic argument we've had in this relationship devolved into a total farce of us frantically pulling up sources to prove our positions and "cite your source!!" being repeated by both us. The rare geeky argument aside, I've never been with someone I've worked so well with as him. We really do make
  13. That's so great to hear!!
  14. I think you should hold off and when things get better (totally understand why moving was tricky this year!) move to Florida! Or somewhere else that suits your fancy in the U. S. I wouldn't get too caught up in this particular situation. Sure, it's a nice distraction. But careful.. I think there's good reason to be cautious. Just my opinion. Good luck.
  15. I mean, if you are willing to consider moving countries for a woman, why not pack up and move to a city in the U.S. with a bustling Hispanic community? You'd have the opportunity to meet all kinds of women and to date more organically.
  16. When people make comments like that, you can almost guarantee they are also making judgemental as hell comments to other parents. "if I only had one kid, I'd be Martha Stewart too". "if I made the money you did, I would never be tired". It's like yeah, well you aren't, so don't worry about it. 😂
  17. He's a married man who has outright told you he intends to stay married in order to get something more from his wife. Run. Run and don't look back. Brace yourself because I'm about to say something you won't want to hear. This guy is not quality, he's a major user. He has at least 2 women on the hook to get what he wants regardless of how it hurts those around him, his wife and you. I wonder what he tells her! He can't propose marriage to you, he's married. That he'd even say that is so disrespectful to you. Good for you for not having sex with him while being reminded of his wife.
  18. Awww LootieTootie, those kids around you are lucky to have you! I absolutely love stories of people breaking out of limiting family cycles. I think enotalone has a high ratio of strong amazing women who have chosen all sorts of paths. There's a big difference in feeling like you chose, and those who feel they have not really had that opportunity. Unfortunately, not having access to sexual education and birth control is still very much a reality for a lot of girls and women (and boys and men!). Add to that massive pressures and social/financial/other rewards for having kids and there isn'
  19. Call the hotline ASAP and we are here to support you in getting out. You've made a first step posting here. Calling the hotline is another. One step at a time, you can do this.
  20. I remember your previous posts. You've expressed being burned out for quite a while now, even before baby #2. Has your wife gone back to work yet? Are you done growing your family now? Do you ever give each other breaks where you take turns giving the other me time that isn't open to criticism?
  21. I'm pretty conservative fiscally, but I have dipped one toe in crypto out of pure curiosity. If it goes, it goes, it's small potatoes and purely for fun. I totally get what you mean... A lot of people are looking for that get rich quick scheme, or diet scheme, or some way to get around grinding it out. Like you said, doing the work is "boring", but that's the bulk of life?! I always remember my stepdads advice about life being 80% maintenance 20% new things... So if you can master maintenance and the basics (those things we have to do over and over and over), you actually make progress f
  22. He can't just up and leave because of his job, right? Do you have savings or some sort of income to support yourself and the kids, or are you depending on him financially right now?
  23. Oh, it's not for the faint of heart. I still get choked up thinking of this amazing couple I know, who fostered and were set to adopt a brother and sister, and at the last moment those kids were sent back to a bio relative. It was soul crushing what those kids had been through.
  24. I'm one of those people who has always been somewhere in the middle. I love kids, and can see the appeal of wanting to become a mom. But then, I also see the appeal of a life where you focus all that energy in other ways. I didn't want to have a child unless I was 100% in a position and excited to dedicate what I think a son/daughter deserves. So I left it, for many years, only really revisiting it again in my mid 30s. Honestly, I can be happy either way. I don't want to raise a child to give my life it's purpose or its meaning, I just don't feel that way. I just feel at this point
  25. Besides working on my business, I've just been living super simply. And it's helping a lot. Lots of exercise - I bought myself my first new bicycle as an adult! - and expanding my garden. I bought myself a CSA box for my birthday coming up, so between that and my garden the idea is hopefully will be able to cover produce and some other food over summer and fall without relying on the grocery stores. The idea is to wean off big grocery and some other over time, and I think it's doable for the most part. I barely watch tv anymore, and have reduced my screen time to mostly work now. I've lo
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