itsallgrand

I'm not even dating and haven't for 8 years now, and I'm stressed by the constant deluge of texts. Some people do freak out if you aren't in constant communication, even over a gif. I feel like it has to be actively managed, which is labour I'd really rather not do bit is inevitable now.

A lawyer, a job, a plan for housing, therapy, and reliable birth control. A bunch of these resources may be available at no or low cost - something you need to look into. It's a lot but you can do it. It's for your kids , let that be the motivation.

Wow you got a lot of great responses and I think everyone had something to add and it is probably a combination of these things. I'd add that it's very common nowadays for media to pull content straight from forums and use it for everything from articles to rage bait to anything else you can think of. People are less trusting out of necessity in what they share and to who. They have no idea who you actually are. If you are verified, you might get more responses to what you seek, but I wouldn't necessarily know if that's worth it in this situation. I think you'd be better off researching the old fashioned way if getting those details right to a time and place are important. Old fashioned way meaning finding and reading relevant sources, and feet on the ground talking to people in real life ..but again, foot on the ground, people may want verification of what you doing and who you are.

Sweet!! Little places with home style sized portions for the win!

Totally fair as long as you tip well , I think.

No. And just say No. And enjoy your coffee at home in the morning knowing you didn't make things worse for yourself.

I'm definitely guilty of it too. Wasted so much time and energy worrying about all the things I couldn't do anything about anyways! So I hope Alex will get something from our sharing.

It happens a lot that people aren't 100% in communicating what they REALLY want and flip flopping around. That's something you need to learn to navigate too. The biggest thing I'm seeing is that you have trouble simply acknowledging a mistake and changing course. Instead you double and triple down. Maybe try only focusing on your area you control. What could you have done differently? What can you do differently now? Have you ever read any of Stephen Coveys books? I got a lot from it and you might like it as it is business orientated but relates to life as well. He talks a lot about circle of influence - what you control, what you don't, working as efficiently as possible. You are wasting so much energy focusing outside what you control and it will wear you down!

Lol too funny.

Oh God, this reminds me of my former work place where they kept cutting in all kinds of ways with the on the floor employees. And people grumbled but took it, until they went to 1 ply scratchy toilet paper. Then there was hell lol. People literally tore dispensers off the walls, and maliciously complied at every turn until decent toilet paper came back. I remember the one responsible literally sent our maintence guy to the grocery store to get tp, it was that bad. Good times!

I agree with catfeeder that you'd be better off with a side job that is well defined, clock in and clock out, and with better pay. It's out there . It might be humbling too, which may help wake you up to the danger you are in with that debt. You can't afford to be looking down your nose at others.

Right off the bat, all that for minimum wage? Hell no. Take the lesson and move on.

Kids don't understand nor care about adult drama, they just care if you are there. They grow up fast and what happens now could determine a lot of their feelings toward you as they get older and can choose to see you on their own. What's the main goal and priority here? You won't change your daughter .

Wow. Hope you are cozy warm inside!

We got our first real snowstorm and it's supposed to continue into tomorrow. Some major roads closed so stayed home and snow blowed and baked and did some reading.

Ugh it's terrible 😞 Its getting hard to have a nice life here. I'm grateful for a roof over my head and I can afford good food. It's gotten ridiculous now.

Yes, this. Here's a date you have to work with and here's some help I'm willing to give, clean and simple. You shouldn't feel badly about her situation. She's been cruising on your back and that is on her. You might want to check the laws where you live though.

I think it was unkind of her to go on that vacation knowing already that she didn't want to pursue anything more committed with you. She did know you were dating with the hope of finding a relationship. For next time, I'd beware the early things some people say as outs. Some are happy to go along for a ride with no intention of it going any where. "I don't know what I want" " I seek validation from others" and the like are little flags. But don't beat yourself up! You stayed true to yourself the whole way and that's what matters.

It honestly sounds like it's more than weed plus some serious mental health issues. It's not safe to stay OP.

People who talk themselves up so much and others down like your brother are often the most insecure people. Ever think he might feel threatened that you actually broke off on your own path while he is still stuck beholden to the family? I have a few relatives who do this kind of thing but we are relatively close, and after they've blown off talking themselves up I hear all the things they aren't happy with. Everything has its cost, and if you are deciding what to pursue based on trying to compare with someone or something, the cost is often steep. Getting away from being sucked into that mentality is pretty priceless imo.

Ohhh sending big Christmas hugs. Hope you have a great one.

Merry Christmas 🎅 🎄 I woke up and it was snowing. Almost was looking like a green Christmas. Put a smile on my face to see the winter wonderland for Christmas time!

Merry Christmas Lolita. 🎅🤶 Haha I'm not a ban em! kind of person. I feel most at home being able to have varying opinions.

People vary a lot. Experiences as a young person play a part too. I personally grew up in an area that had a lot of highly religious people. 9/10 of them went to Bible camp as a teen, and then married straight away. There wasn't much choice for them though as they faced being shunned from their community if they didn't. And there were a good chunk of my friends who grew up poor. I'm talking trailer in the boonies poor. A lot of them married young too but I don't consider that totally choice with options either. They were trying to get away from bad homes and didn't get taught skills to do some pretty basic things on their own. Both my sets of grandparents, it wasn't really choice for them either. It would have taken incredible grit to take any other path. Some people know. Some people it works out great. I was lucky in that I really had choice since I was young. I chose not to, but that's for the best, as I am definitely someone who needed time on my own before I could give what I want to give someone.

This is hard to read because this guy is destroying your self worth. It breaks my heart this is becoming your prototype of what a relationship is! You don't get over it, you listen to your self and everything in you is screaming get away from this dude. Why is pleasing him more important to you than self preservation and what would be good for you? I also agree with what everyone else has said.