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hitek_rednek

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Everything posted by hitek_rednek

  1. hitek_rednek
    I know you would try to make ammends if he called tomorow, but you are doing the right thing by keeping busy, and you are right, the work it took, and the stuff you had to deal with with his arrogance is not worth the trouble. There are plenty of us out there that are understanding and compassionate enough to deal with lifes little roller coaster...and deal with it with a partner, the right way it should be done. Keep going hun, you are on the right track. Best of luck to ya. -Hitek_Rednek-
  2. hitek_rednek
    Well, glad to hear you had a decent weekend. Yes, I am very analytical as well, so we very well must have bumped heads on this, especially both being Taurus's. Anywho...I don't think reciprocating the pain and frustration is the best bet, it is simply lowering yourself to his level, which you are above. I would say to give him no information at all. If you must write back to that email, simply thank him for sending it, congratulate him on his successes, and wish him the best. Keep it short and simple, with absolutely no emotion whatsoever. Making him double think his actions is only going to get you hurt again in the long run, simply because he may actually decide to get back with you, and then 3 months or so down the road, it's the exact same story. Let hiim find himself, choose his path, and live his life. If it were truly meant to be, once he has accomplished this, and got the "play" out of his system, you very well may end up knowing a totally different him, one you may or may not like, and it may work out at that time. As it stands right now, you are setting yourself up for disaster again. I would definitely just say to keep it short and cold with him, and don't even let him think or know that you give a damn about what he's doing or who he's doing it with, and most of all, keep your private life totally out of his head. -Hitek_Rednek-
  3. hitek_rednek
    Cassiana, I'm not angry with you, and I wasn't when I wrote that post either. I understand you are hurt, but it just seemed like every idea I through at you, you shot down. No, obviously I don't know 100% of the situation, all I know is what you have written, and I did my best to come up with possible starter solutions for you, and you seemed to disregard them all. You are right, I definitely could have worded my post differently, in a kinder manner, and I should have, but I didn't, so that's now dust in the wind. You say you get up, make yourself look good and go on with the "happy facade". That is exactly what you need to do, all day, every day, and eventually, it will become routine, and before you know it, it will no longer be a facade. I wish you the best of luck on your dates, let me know how they turn out. If I wasn't very happily engaged, and lived anywhere near you, I'd take you out for a drink and tell you stupid jokes all night to make you laugh and have a good time, not because I was looking to get anything out of it, or even start a relationship, simply because I have a soft spot for upset women. I was raised that women should be cherished, honored, and respected, and I just don't like to see any female cry or hurt. Again, I wish you the best, and let me know how it all turns out. -Hitek_Rednek-
  4. hitek_rednek
    Hey man, I feel ya, seriously. However, tonight isn't the night for me to post a good reply to you. I'm having too much of a hard time with life myself right at this moment, and think I'll just finish this beer and head to bed. But I will get up with you tomorrow morning, that's for sure. There is a lot I want to say, but now just isn't the time to say it. -Hitek_Rednek- ***Sometimes I think it's God's destiny just to kick you in the *** over and over again, just to have a good time with it***
  5. hitek_rednek
    It's real simple, you are 15 years old, you don't need to be in a "real" relationship anyway. You are at that have fun time of your life, don't screw it up by being with some guy, be with all the guys, just not sexually of course, but have fun, enjoy life, because before you know it, those days are long gone. -Hitek_Rednek-
  6. hitek_rednek
    OK, first and foremost, go buy some condoms and keep them with you at all times, but not in your wallet, bad things happen to condoms in wallets, trust me on that one. Secondly, when the making out starts to get hot and heavy, don't get nervous, just let your hands do the walking, don't be aggressive, be sensual about it, if she wants you to stop, she'll let you know. Thirdly, don't be shy, let nature take its course, and always, above anything else, be a gentleman about it. She is nervous and you are nervous, but hell it's the birds and the bees, so buzz on over there and have a good time. -Hitek_Rednek-
  7. hitek_rednek
    Damn, somewhere I have heard those words before StarrieMarie!!! Good girl, I'm proud of ya!. Anyway, to lpink78, you got played, she got played, but you came out the stronger person, because you are done with him (you are done with him right?). Like Starr said, your life will be better now, you just have to allow your heart and mind to believe that. Look at it like this, liars and cheats are a dime a dozen, who needs that when it can come so freely, find yourself someone that will be true and honest. You sound like a good person, so good things will come to you. -Hitek_Rednek-
  8. hitek_rednek
    That has to be the sorriest excuse I have ever heard. "It's a joke"??? There wasn't even anything humorous in it. You caught him fair and square, and that was the first thing that came to mind. Now, you have two options here, trust him because his ex is now married, hopefully happily. Or, take it as a warning for the future that he'll leave you for the next one he thinks he has feelings for. You know him better than us, so it's your call. Best of luck with it. -Hitek_Rednek-
  9. hitek_rednek
    OK, on a guys perspective, and I'll preface by saying an immature guys perspective. I for one would have to say that if I EVER had the opportunity to date a celebrity, I could care less if they cheated on me because hey, look at it this way, you will always, for the rest of your life be able to say, "I dated Mr. X, yeah, he cheated on me, but I still dated him" -Hitek_Rednek-
  10. hitek_rednek
    Well it's hard to keep myself busy for that long, seeing as how I see him at Christmas for a week, February for a week, April for a week, then for a month in the summer. I know that isn't that big of a gap, but it seems like forever to me. Guess I gotta come up with long term hobbies, LOL. Yes, my fiancee is very supportive and very helpful with the situation, but it just seems that no matter what, nothing helps. I know it's silly, but it just happens. I just have a hard time thinking about him and not being sad. I tend to agree, I don't think I'm going to "get over it". I guess I'm just going to have to turn the sadness into fonder memories, of the fun things, instead of the fact that he is gone until next time. If only I could talk his hardcore "yankee" momma into moving down south, then I could do every weekend, but she's a born and bred NY'er, so that'll never happen. No offense to any other yankees here. -Hitek_Rednek-
  11. hitek_rednek
    Well I have given you everything I know of and to be honest with you, it doesn't sound like you want advice. I'm sorry to be so blunt, but it seems that you are seeking sympathy rather than ideas. I am out of ideas, so I guess I will leave this to someone else to advise you on. I wish you the best with it and the rest of your life. -Hitek_Rednek-
  12. hitek_rednek
    Wishy washy is no good, you are to mature to deal with that. You know what you want in life...someone to love you for you, and stand by your side no matter what. You DO NOT have that in him, not at all. This guy is not the end of the world, there are a lot of us out there who are exactly what you are looking for. He has no idea what he wants, but he wants to make sure that you are in such a state of turmoil that the minute he snaps his fingers you'll be there. It's a game he's playing, and you are the game piece. Stop being a game piece. If you MUST talk to him, call him or email him and tell him that once and for all, this is what I want, you are who I want it with, can you do that, yes or no. Don't let him give you any BS about it either, it's a simple yes or no question that needs no further explanation. If it is no, then it is no, if it is yes, then you must be the strong person and tell him that this game is over, completely, forever. Tell him that you are not going to be a puppet on a string, and he has to accept that or move along. It's a hard thing to do, I know, but it has to be done. -Hitek_Rednek-
  13. hitek_rednek
    Your best bet is no contact with him at all, just get rid of him completely. Block his emails, don't accept his calls or IM's, and move forward. I know that is easier said than done, and I wish I could physically help you through it. You don't need the frustration, anxiety, and hurt that he is causing you. Life will put you on enough roller coasters without you standing in line for one yourself. -Hitek_Rednek-
  14. hitek_rednek
    I don't do well with doctors, of any sort. Never have believed in them, probably won't start anytime soon. I'd end up lying to the counselor to just tell him what he wanted to hear so he'd leave me alone. Plus, they want to put you on meds for everything nowadays, and while I enjoy the occasional percocet, I don't need drugs to help me deal with my feelings. I just want the hurt to stop, or at least subside a bit. I know it's part of being a parent, but I don't think being a parent should hurt this bad, although I'm starting to think it does in my situation. Oh, and to Computer Guy....yes, IRC is just multiplayer notepad!! -Hitek_Rednek-
  15. hitek_rednek
    OK, well my son lives in NY with his mother, and I live in SC, about 1000 miles apart. I get visitation, and his mother and I are better friends now than when we were married. That's the good news. Bad news is I want to know how to stop being so incredibly down when he goes home from his visitation. My new fiancee has 2 children, and they are here, but for weeks it just seems like my life and this house is so terribly empty. I know it's normal to miss someone you care about, but I'm thinking I'm carrying it a bit far. I mean, certain songs on the radio about father's and son's make me cry, I have a hard time looking at his pictures, and it's totally heartbreaking when I talk to him on the phone. I'm just wondering how to cope/deal/get over this, I guess, obsessiveness about it. -Hitek_Rednek-
  16. hitek_rednek
    Well you need to knock off that suicide thinking, that's going to do nothing for you at all, and is a real cop out way of doing things. You are smarter than that, and know better than that. Perhaps you are trying to hard, I don't know. I can say from experience that those built like barbie are the hardest to approach. I would probably be intimidated by your looks and think that there is no way I'd ever be in your league. But, not all men are like myself. I really think that when the right one comes along, you'll know it. From what you wrote, it doesn't sound like you did anything wrong at all in this relationship, and you have no need to blame yourself, just remember that what goes around comes around, and he'll get his hurt for hurting you. That may not be what you want, but it'll happen nonetheless. I am in no way a religious person, and I know it's hard to believe, but things in life do happen for a reason, and we may never know that reason, and if we do know, we might think it's bs, but hey, we live until we die, and we have to deal with what's handed to us. I lost somone very important to me as well, it wasn't a spouse, but it was my son when my ex and I broke up. He is now 1000 miles away and the hurt is no less now than it was the day she left with him, so I know about missing someone you love, but I have to go on, and make the best of it, and hope that one day, things get better in that situation. That's exactly what you need to do, pull yourself up, look in the mirror, tell yourself that you are beautiful, and you are a desirable person, and to hell with those that don't want to be with you. Put a smile on your face and I'll be you'll be greeted with the same. And hey, maybe what your looking for has been right under your nose the whole time. It just takes a new outlook on the situation. You are a Taurus (birthday one day after mine), so I know you are a strong willed and minded purpose, now use it to your advantage. -Hitek_Rednek-
  17. hitek_rednek
    Blame StarrieMarie, she did it, LOL -Hitek_Rednek-
  18. hitek_rednek
    OK, here it is in black and white....don't waste your time with him. If he cannot accept the fact that panic attacks happen, and they are not your fault, then he is not worth the trouble. A "real" man would have been there to comfort you, hold you, make sure you were OK. A "real" man, would have been concerned for your health. You are a woman, not a trophy to show off to his friends as how perfect she is, that is childish and immature. He needs to go out and find his little barbie [PROFANITY DELETED BY MODERATOR] to show off. You are too good for him, and don't deserve the heartache he is causing you. A panic attack is a scary thing, I know because my soon to be wife has something very similar. She gets scared that I will be mad at her or be embarrassed of her because of it, but I'm not, I care about her, and I care about us, and I don't give a flying crap what anyone else thinks, that's the way a relationship is supposed to work. You did nothing wrong, and you have no reason to be embarrassed, well except for the fact that you had some jerk who was more concerned with his appearance than with your health. I'm sorry that was so rude, but people don't need to be treated like that. Life is too short to put up with it. -Hitek_Rednek-
  19. hitek_rednek
    Yes, you do sound like an attractive woman, and could probably have any man you wanted. It sounds like this guy is insecure with himself and having M.E (not sure what that is though), and feels like you are too good for him. It's his issue, not yours, you've done what you could, there is no more for you to do now but wipe the tears and step forward with life. I'm sorry this sounds so cold hearted, but it's reality in my opinion anyway. As far as guys getting over the greener pastures thing, it never happens, we just grow up and don't act on it any longer, but I would say that 98% of all guys out there live with the philosophy of "just because i'm on a diet doesn't mean i can't look at the menu". It's not a bad thing, unless they are too immature and act on it, and expect the woman to be sitting there waiting when they are done playing, that's not how life works. -Hitek_Rednek-
  20. hitek_rednek
    Dude, you're 16, tons of years and women ahead of you. It seems to me like she likes the idea of having you in the palm of her hand to use as a puppet whenever she chooses, and in the meantime, she has her freedom to do whatever she wants, without worrying about cheating or hurting, or being attached. Best advice, let it go man, just ice her completely. I mean, be friends, say hi, etc. but hold all those feelings inside until they are gone completely. You'll find someone soon enough that will help erase the hurtful feelings, but don't allow yourself to keep being her toy. -Hitek_Rednek-
  21. hitek_rednek
    Stop being so gullible. Of course he is going to tell your sister those things, because he knows that she is going to turn around and immediately tell you, so she is his first line of attack to get the "good words" to you. Find out for yourself, and don't believe everything you hear. If he was drinking, I hate to say it, but he was horny, and nice words and thoughts are the quickest way to get in someones pants, especially if they already like you a bit. I'm not saying that this is true completely with Randy, but I'm saying be careful and don't do anything you will regret down the road. Be sensible, ask the right questions, and don't let him woo you totally, try to read through some of the things he says, and hell, if all else fails, anonymously contact a couple of his ex girlfriends. -Hitek_Rednek_
  22. hitek_rednek
    As a man guilty of the above crimes, I can only say that it is the old "Grass is greener" thing. Yes, the guy may have feelings for you, and those feelings may be very strong, but they start thinking "I Wonder" and eventually want to find out if just maybe, there is something better. It has nothing to do with what the female did most times, it's just the guy wondering. I guess it's better than him cheating on you, although it doesn't make it right, or make the hurt any less. Best advice I can give is not to blame yourself, and just simply move on, perhaps you will find something better as well, and if not, well you know he's going to come back eventually, then it's a decision of yours to make, as to whether or not you trust him. Once bitten twice shy, ya know. -Hitek_Rednek-
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