Seraphim Posted June 16, 2019 Share Posted June 16, 2019 She is someone I am very conflicted about. She died an hour ago after many years of drinking herself to death. 😓 Link to comment
SarahLancaster Posted June 16, 2019 Share Posted June 16, 2019 That's too bad. Sorry to hear it. Link to comment
RedDress Posted June 16, 2019 Share Posted June 16, 2019 I’m sorry for your loss. It can be hard watching people make decisions that are not good for them. But sometimes that’s what you have to do. It makes sense that you would be sad about it. Sorry 😔 Link to comment
Cherylyn Posted June 16, 2019 Share Posted June 16, 2019 I'm very sorry Seraphim. It was such a tragic ending. Link to comment
Seraphim Posted June 16, 2019 Author Share Posted June 16, 2019 She was my my mom’s brother’s wife. She cheated on my uncle with my dad and effectively destroyed our family and hers . My father was the major culprit and evil. She was a very abused child. She was also my mom’s best friend from the time they were 14 and 17 ( my mom) up until stuff happened with my dad 30 years ago. Link to comment
HeartGoesOn Posted June 16, 2019 Share Posted June 16, 2019 I'm sorry for your loss, Vic. May she RIP. Link to comment
luminousone Posted June 16, 2019 Share Posted June 16, 2019 I imagine the conflict is: grief for the loss of a family member, perhaps relief that her suffering is over (and maybe the end of suffering for family members who were affected by her drinking), maybe even anger at times for drinking herself to death. Whatever you are feeling- it is all real. And it all may come and go in waves. Honor and remember good things about her if you can. Light a candle for her spirit. Support yourself and family members. Condolences to you and your family Link to comment
Seraphim Posted June 16, 2019 Author Share Posted June 16, 2019 I imagine the conflict is: grief for the loss of a family member, perhaps relief that her suffering is over (and maybe the end of suffering for family members who were affected by her drinking), maybe even anger at times for drinking herself to death. Whatever you are feeling- it is all real. And it all may come and go in waves. Honor and remember good things about her if you can. Light a candle for her spirit. Support yourself and family members. Condolences to you and your family It is sad. Tomorrow I have to tell my dad he doesn’t know and he was with her for 15 years.  My mom is a mess as is her brother.  My Aunt was with another man the last 10 years but I never knew him. Link to comment
Carus Posted June 16, 2019 Share Posted June 16, 2019 Sorry for your loss Seraphim* I too lost my best friend just 3 days ago at age 51. We tried to help for years but in the end he just didn't have the strength and the black dog eventually ran him down* It's quite amazing how much the mind and body can take....until it doesn't. You've probably seen me write 'Stay off the alcohol' in many of my posts.... Be kind to yourself. Take good care* ((Hugs)) Carus* Link to comment
Starlight925 Posted June 16, 2019 Share Posted June 16, 2019 So sorry for your loss. Sometimes, the choices people make are ultimately the same choices that cause them a life filled with regret and, unfortunately, death. All you can do now is grieve and process, and we are here for you. Hugs. Link to comment
Seraphim Posted June 16, 2019 Author Share Posted June 16, 2019 Thanks everyone. I am trying to keep in mind the good person she was when I was a kid and the fact she is no longer in pain emotional or otherwise. I just don’t know how I am going to stomach telling my dad today. Visits with him are stressful enough without this . And I hate watching my mom who is so torn up and the fact that my uncle my mom’s brother is just devastated over a woman who tore a massive hole in his life and my mom’s and those of her children and her niece (me)and nephew ( my brother) . It just doesn’t jive with the person that she was when I was a kid . Link to comment
bluecastle Posted June 16, 2019 Share Posted June 16, 2019 Just sending some hugs your way, Sera. Grief is always complicated, and all the more so when its for people whose demons wound us along the way. Link to comment
WithLove Posted June 16, 2019 Share Posted June 16, 2019 Love you, L. We are here for you. Praying that things go okay with your fam today. Link to comment
AliceSummers Posted June 16, 2019 Share Posted June 16, 2019 it can be hard but it will get better for u i will be thinking of u Link to comment
greendots Posted June 16, 2019 Share Posted June 16, 2019 Seraphim, I am wishing you hope in the midst of sorrow and comfort in the midst of pain. Many blessings to you and your family!  I too lost my best friend just 3 days ago at age 51. We tried to help for years but in the end he just didn't have the strength and the black dog eventually ran him down* I am also wishing you hope in the midst of sorrow and comfort in the midst of pain, Carus. Many blessings to you! Link to comment
Seraphim Posted June 16, 2019 Author Share Posted June 16, 2019 Thanks everyone. I know I should not be surprised but my father’s callousness was stunning he didn’t give a rat’s behind that she died. I can’t believe I am related to that man. Link to comment
Seraphim Posted June 16, 2019 Author Share Posted June 16, 2019 It will be hard to process for sure because she is the first of my parent’s generation to pass and the first of my aunts and uncles . 😢😓 and she wasn’t even that old she only turned 70 2 months ago . Link to comment
itsallgrand Posted June 17, 2019 Share Posted June 17, 2019 I'm sorry for your loss, Sera. Link to comment
Seraphim Posted June 17, 2019 Author Share Posted June 17, 2019 Thank you. There is supposed to be a memorial service for her but unfortunately I can’t go . 😓 I'm sorry for your loss, Sera. Link to comment
Seraphim Posted June 20, 2019 Author Share Posted June 20, 2019 I found out that all her children were there to tell her goodbye ( except the one that passed) . And at some time there will be a memorial service . She will be cremated and eventually buried with her last boyfriend . Link to comment
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