Teenage student found my nudes

[moodindigo91]

I realize my post doesn't help how you are feeling now. Please know you are not alone, this has happened to others, even before cell phones. It might help to read stories of how other people have bounced back from this kind of thing, held their heads high and moved on. Brooke Shields and Vanessa Williams are two that come to mind (pre cell phones) who have recovered with dignity.

 

Lol yeah but they are also wealthy celebrities with PR teams.

[abitbroken]

From what I understand from my relatives who are teachers or work with young children, part of the job is not having nude photos available of yourself, having Facebook profiles in such a way that students/clients cannot "friend" you or read up on you (some teachers have "class" bulletin board pages and then a private Facebook using their first and middle name or something where you can't find them searching "mrs. Nancy Smith from Smyth elementary). Its not about loss of free speech - its what you do when you have a job like that and someone most fit for that job category are people who have the natural inclination to always assume "what if my future kids saw this" before putting info out there. Assume that ANYTHING on an electronic device can be seen.

 

This is 100% your fault for handing the kid your phone instead of a ipad or something used communally by the office/class AND for having nude photos on a device you have on with you to work with those kids (and why take them in the first place?_. Sorry, i have absolutely no sympathy for you here.

[abitbroken]

I have to admit I am both shocked and surprised that your supervisor of all people suggests hacking into this kid's email account. Maybe it's just me, but there is so much wrong with the entire scenario (not just the hacking part), it is truly disturbing to say the least (imo).

 

Agree. But you can't make him unsee the photos no matter what. They couldn't have been hidden if he found them in the few moments he had the phone. He would have to be looking for them, or they are right out in front. Or someone else told him about the nude photos on your phone and he wanted to see for himself.

[quirky]

Although I agree with some of the comments posted I just want to send you some support because I'd be feeling awful if that happened to me. Hope you can work something out with the supervisor relatively soon so you don't sit with these feelings for too long. Boundaries are so important in helping work aren't they..I am sure you will be reflecting on things from a different angle now but still, it's a s***ty thing to happen and I feel for you.

[journeynow]

Lol yeah but they are also wealthy celebrities with PR teams.

My point was that the OP is not alone, and the two people I mentioned survived. Yes, they are high profile, which is why we know about them.

[TMifune]

Pics or it didn't happen! ;-)

 

 

Kidding...kidding.

 

Take a deep breath and chalk this up to a very serious lesson on boundaries and securing sensitive information.. It only feels like it's going to ruin your life. So take a deep breath, and as j.man says, get yourself in a position to be ready and able to handle whatever consequences come out of it.

 

Despite the expression, nobody dies from embarrassment. You will be okay.

[Maddyb12]

The pictures were deleted on my phone in the deleted folder. That is my fault for not emptying it regularly but this was not something easy to find or expected from the kid who asks permission to press the home screen etc. j would like this thread to be closed please. This is not why I came here. Thank you

[journeynow]

The pictures were deleted on my phone in the deleted folder. That is my fault for not emptying it regularly but this was not something easy to find or expected from the kid who asks permission to press the home screen etc. j would like this thread to be closed please. This is not why I came here. Thank you

 

If you need to rant or receive understanding, or suggestions going forward, sometimes asking for that first helps. Take advice with a grain of salt, as if people are giving themselves advice if they were in your shoes. If you want the thread closed you might need to contact a forum admin.

[HeartGoesOn]

Lol yeah but they are also wealthy celebrities with PR teams.

 

Apparently you haven't noticed the amount of members on this forum who have sent nude photos, and lived to regret it. Nothing of that nature is ever secure after being posted on the internet, that's a well known fact.

 

Please feel free to search the forum, and view the consequences of these type of actions.

[Snny]

I work with a LEA with children who have severe disabilities... I can't decide which one is worse: you having explicit pictures of yourself (very unprofessional) OR or your boss suggesting taking an ILLEGAL action of breaching the privacy of a client's computer/server.

 

Your boss and organization should be under investigation. None of you are being ethical or professional here.

[Maddyb12]

I work with a LEA with children who have severe disabilities... I can't decide which one is worse: you having explicit pictures of yourself (very unprofessional) OR or your boss suggesting taking an ILLEGAL action of breaching the privacy of a client's computer/server.

 

Your boss and organization should be under investigation. None of you are being ethical or professional here.

 

No one ever said hacking his email. Mom has access to it and he is aware or talking with him and him allowing us to get into the email to delete the files.

[Seraphim]

Hopefully this will be the end of it . But work with your organization to set up better protocols . It is really hard lesson to learn.

[boltnrun]

Is it SOP at your organization for the employees to use their personal phones for work purposes?

 

At my job, we are definitely NOT allowed to use our own phones. The company I work for provides all electronic devices for us to use. We get into trouble if we try to use our own phones, computers or tablets.

[butterfly45]

Is it SOP at your organization for the employees to use their personal phones for work purposes?

 

At my job, we are definitely NOT allowed to use our own phones. The company I work for provides all electronic devices for us to use. We get into trouble if we try to use our own phones, computers or tablets.

 

 

Same. Even when I was a carer for a really sh&*y company that had questionable standards, they still provided us with work mobiles that we had to use in replacement of our own phones, so clients would call or text that work phone.

[TMifune]

Same. Even when I was a carer for a really sh&*y company that had questionable standards, they still provided us with work mobiles that we had to use in replacement of our own phones, so clients would call or text that work phone.

 

An awful lot of companies are moving toward BYOD (bring your own device).

 

 

 

My company cancelled all company-issued cell-phones except for very specific circumstances in favor of providing application access to company resources from personal cell-phones. It can save the company a pretty significant amount of money. (1000 cell phone plans * $50/month is $50,000 / month) I don't know how prevalent that would be in behavioral therapy, but it's very common in private sector business.

[boltnrun]

An awful lot of companies are moving toward BYOD (bring your own device).

 

 

 

My company cancelled all company-issued cell-phones except for very specific circumstances in favor of providing application access to company resources from personal cell-phones. It can save the company a pretty significant amount of money. (1000 cell phone plans * $50/month is $50,000 / month) I don't know how prevalent that would be in behavioral therapy, but it's very common in private sector business.

 

But in that case, I would have one phone for work purposes and another for personal.

 

My brother's company does what you detailed above. So he has one for work and another for personal. That way he doesn't accidentally text "I love you Beautiful, good night" to one of his clients or to his boss (just to me, like he did accidentally lol).

[TMifune]

But in that case, I would have one phone for work purposes and another for personal.

 

My brother's company does what you detailed above. So he has one for work and another for personal. That way he doesn't accidentally text "I love you Beautiful, good night" to one of his clients or to his boss (just to me, like he did accidentally lol).

 

Or accidentally text his girlfriend: "F you, I quit!" ;-)

[HeartGoesOn]

No one ever said hacking his email. Mom has access to it and he is aware or talking with him and him allowing us to get into the email to delete the files.

 

I'm confused. Who is "Mom" and how does this person have access to this kids e-mail?

[butterfly45]

I'm pretty sure we used pay as you go phones. But really the easiest solution is just not to use your phone at work. It's moving towards email communication more and more. Plus if clients don't see your phone out, they can't ask to use it.

[Seraphim]

At work my husband's phone has to be locked in a metal box with security until you leave.

[reinventmyself]

My brother worked under a section 4 clearance (confidential military projects) where he had to be renewed by the DOHS every year.

 

One year he was contacted by an investigator who reported by remotely accessing their home computer (unknowingly) they found nude photos of his underage step daughter that she had uploaded and deleted.

 

It's just a reminder that nothing is private.

[Hermes]

"I'm confused. Who is "Mom" and how does this person have access to this kids e-mail?"

 

Well you may ask, Heart.

[rosephase]

OP I'm sorry this happened to you. I'm not sure why so many posters on here feel the need to tell you how you screwed up. Cleary you feel a lot of shame a guilt and you don't need to listen to random internet people tell you that you should feel more shame.

 

For the record I have tons of nude photos and sexual videos of me. It's something I enjoy doing with my partners. It's a fun and exciting part of my sex life. It doesn't make me stupid or bad. It doesn't make me a bad employee. It doesn't mean I'm gross or wrong. It's a personal sexual choice. And while there is risk involved because we live in a society that still thinks if you are sexual person you are somehow bad, incompetent or gross.... It's worth the risk to me. There are risks when it comes to driving a car. There are risks involved in having children. There are risks around basically every choice we make everyday. And it's only because people still aren't sex positive that they judge you harshly for a personal choice.

 

It sucks that this happened. And I can understand why it feels so violating. I hope you can forgive yourself and move on. It is okay to be a human being, we are (most of us anyway) sexual creatures and fallible. Mistakes happen. Don't let people make you feel worse because this mistake happened to involve sex. That is just our cultural's sex negative backlash. You made a mistake, like getting a parking ticket, like paying your taxes late, like accidentally sending an e-mail to the wrong person. Mistakes happen everyday. You've got to live and learn and move on.

[boltnrun]

Lesson learned, never underestimate the technological capabilities of young people.

 

One of the younger employees at my job wrote a program that does his job for him, so he is free to walk around, socialize and get snacks in the break room while his program does his electronic scanning and filing. Smart kid. Smart now-jobless kid.

 

But as far as searching a "Deleted Items" folder on an I-Phone...even old lady me could have figured that one out.

 

As for choosing to take nude selfies...I could care less what other people choose to do. I can only say how I'd react if one of my kids received a copy of that pic from a friend who got into a teacher's phone. And I'd be angry with both the teenager AND the teacher. I'm sure I'd say the same thing...selfie away, just not on a phone that is used for work.

 

Incidentally, I had to inform a coworker that the IMs she and her husband sent one another on the work system weren't private. She expressed shock and dismay. I thought, really? You thought they would stay private and just disappear into thin air?

[Seraphim]

It has ZERO to do with the movies and pics and everything to do with how a 14 year got a hold of them. We don't care what she does in her off time.