paulm

I like this question. The classic "alpha male" I'm thinking Gary Cooper, Cary Grant, John Wayne, Dean Martin, would likely end up in: 1. Divorce court 2. Jail They would likely be broke, single, and frustrated like the rest of us.

First dates can be like a job interview. Even when they go well, I always seem to get tired/tense afterwards. It's a 'defeated' feeling. It's exhausting.

This always happens to me at family functions... I turn bright red, grit my teeth, and snarl. usually works.

I'd say go for it, but be wary of the consequences. I've worked in a few different offices over the last couple of years, and have found that when in a new environment like that, it's easy to grasp at straws for companionship. You guys could end up being great friends, which will make work even more fun. Then again, seems so many workplace romances end up in marriage. My parents, and grandparents even...

I resent the american men / european men comment! I'm a guy, but I've been on 5 continents and would say that american men are among the most respectful of the lot! Try Australia or Russia!

So what's the question?

At first I'd be intimidated by myself and convince me that he's dating someone better, then I'd realize I am single and go for it all out. Even though I like me, I would probably be a bit of a jerk to myself because that's how I am when people are sending me the signals. Eventually I'd get over it and go all out. I would then date myself for my good looks and outward appearance that I've got my life in order and really know where I'm going. Then after a few months, I'd realize that I'm pretty unique, but not in the way I originally thought. I'd sort of crumble from the pressure of that whole image I project. I'd be a bit disappointed, and fall in love with me and my quirks, but I wouldn't return my love because I'm a bit detached that way.

I wish I had a similar arrangement going... But I sort of feel sorry for the guy, you're definitely setting him up for a heartbreak. I don't think I could take the guilt of doing that to a girl myself. I think "seduce" implies trickery/dishonesty, sounds like that's what this is. On the other hand, you don't care, so you're just going after what you want and if he's hurt it doesn't matter, right? Happens all the time.

Yeah, call him back. Guys never know how soon is appropriate to call back - wish the girl would more often myself.

Sorry man, move on. Think about it, she was asking if you found your way home from her house -- it wasn't you... Sounds like she probably hooked up with some other guy, or had someone over to her house and thought it was him calling back. Is this the sort you want to be in a relationship with anyway?

Get to the doctor asap. Doctors once thought I had mono - It turned out to be Lymes Disease due to similar symptoms. Not sure if you have this in the UK, but please get to the doc. Even if it costs a bit more, your health is more than worth it.

What do you mean by "cut the cue" ?

I'd have to agree with sydneybean84 - but the guy sounds like he likes you and just doesn't want to mess things up. The asking for permission stuff and "shyness" will get old fast. I'd give it some time first, but do you really want a guy around who's constantly seeking your approval?

I hate to be the devil's advocate here - but if you have gut level suspicions or reservations about him, I'd say ditch him and find someone else. Something's telling you that something's not right on a subconscious level that your conscious mind doesn't recognize. Plus I'm always suspicious of guys who "dance"...

I like when girls try to be subtle about it, because I totally bust em every time. If a guy like me can sense a subtle implication, most women probably can too... "So your girlfriend must cook you dinner..." "What does your girlfriend think of that..." Yes, I bust em every time, and make sure to point it out until they turn red. Just be direct - "are you single?" is good enough.