krnswte143

i understand.. i do always bring up about mybf's ex too. i think its a natural thing we feel jealous about.. cus were dealing w/ someone whos been with our boyfriends.. and for us to try to understand that... is kinda hard if u ask me.. from my experience, its n ot a good thing to get involved with someone who has *past* baggages around. its not an easy thing to get invovle with. i sufffered a lot .

im kinda in a same situation...my bf is still in contact w/ his ex.. although they went out decades ago...now theyre like sister/brother...funny thing is i dont see it that way...nor believe they see each other as sis/bro (when they know they had a past toghether)... i do feel jealous n i do get mad at times when he talks to her or not...she wil come to him for everything n depend on him..i hate it. i know how ur feeling... however, since u knew he wasnt over her... it'll just make things more complicated and plus they work toghheter....can u deal w/ it?

well, everyone feels needy at time.. but to a certain extent... i feel myself needy too. like i want his attention.. i want him to miss me n come see me n call me n so forth... but u cant force a person to do all that.. they need to feel that way in order for them to express their feelings towards u... some ppl show feelings and affections and some just dont... maybe ur bf is one of those type of ppl who do care n love u but doesnt show it that much?

Im having issues with my boyfriend of 2 1/2 years, because i think i am being a bit too needy, and i have a fear of him leaving me, because a year and a half ago he broke up with me for like the day, and it was cuze he was in a bad mood, and im afraid if i get him in a bad mood again like that day, he will just leave me hey girl i know wat exactly u mean.. i am goin through the same thing with my bf.. he broke up w/ me for a day n got back same day.. and now i have a fear he will leave me again if i get him mad or something... i fear as if he wil find someone better than me or seeing someone.. i get the same feelings as u... as many of my friends told me... u need to trust him and believe he wont leave u... and if he does... then we move on.. but girl i am in the shoe as u now!!!!! my suggestion is..... just relax and enjoy ur time being with him.. i mean every couple fights in a relationship.. thats just natural thing.. jus be calm n relax n have a good time w/ ur bf... thats what im doing now.. im tryin to relax and enjoy my time w/ him i myself is needy too i think? if he doesnt go online or call me i always end up doin first... Janella

when i first met my bf .. we went on couple dates and i think after a month we develop a romantic relationship. and few month later we became a couple. so i would say after 4 or 5 month we became a couple (bf/gf)

Hello All, I hope everyone had a good weekend. Anways, I'm having this minor problem with my boyfriend. There was this girl before me. We'll call her "A". It was a crush he had but never made into girlfriend/boyfriend stage. Last year, I think about October or November? I found a picture of a girl on a frame on his shelves. I didn't say anything for few weeks. So after few weeks, I mentioned to him and he put the picture away. He said it was a crush he had and never made into gf/bf stage and they only dated for a month and that she found some other guy. ( they both went to the same college). Anyways, I took his word and I didnt worry. I think this year around March or April ? I found pictures of her on his cell phone ( pics were taken 2 or 3 years ago). I didnt talk to him about this or never mentioned it. Anways around the same month or so i was using his computer and i was looking at our old chat conversations and i came accross conversations betweem them two.. Convos were back 1 or 2 yrs ago. and they stopped talking for awhile i guess and then on january of this yaer they talked again. He ask her out for a lunch. Anyways, i didnt check the chatlog ever since that month. I didn't like the idea of course but i didnt say anything to my boyfriend . I was having other problems that i didnt really care about it. Anways, i think they still talk to each other? I have her SN on my AIM. She signed on few nights ago. I guess i'm being paranoid or jealous or something. Should I worry about this? My bf and i been toghether for an year and 4 month now. We did have our ups n downs in our relationship. Im worried that hes going to leave me for her or someone. I mean when we were dating ( this was like our 3 or 4 month of dating) he was stil talking to her as if he still liked her? I dont know you guys. Do you think I should worry about this or not? Or Should I just let this go and forget about it until something werid happens? Janella

hey.. i understand what your saying... im involved w/ a guy who has an ex girlfriend hanging around... they were never married cus they went out decades ago. anyways i know how u feel..feelin like 2nd best, feel like neglected knowing ur bf mite hav feelins for his ex.... i went through all those phrases of insecurities and paranoia. i am sometimes , honestly paranoid he mite get back w/ her or thinks shes more better than me in looks, personality.. n so on. sometimes i feel as if he is comparing me w/ her. i'll tell u this.. i went through this for an year and it is not healhty for u and ur bf. u shouldnt feel this way when ur in a relationship w/ someone u love. ur suppose to hav trust,faith. i on other hand, trying to figure it out too. ppl had told me not to worry cus hes w/ me n not her... so i'll tell u the same thing too.. hes w/ u now and not w/ her... maybe he still has feelings jammmed up in his mind, it takes a while to cope w/ the sorrow of pains.. im sayin this cus seem like they broke up not so long ago.. i say not to worry too much about it.. easier said than done.. but try to have more trust in ur relationship.. if u dont... it wont work.. im having same problem too.. trying to rebuild trust. Janella.

my bf is the same.he never calls me.. cus we usually chat online but yes u are right it doent hurt to call for few mins... i gues some guys dont take it seriously when us girls want to talk to our bfs for whatever reasons.. but why dont u change the tables n u call him? hehe. mayb he didn call u cus he was busy? it could b many reasons. for me i gave up on him callin me.. it would b nice if he did jus for few mins..but thats how my bf is.. so i could suggest u is jus don worry about it.. if he says he wil call n dont...u should call him.. maybe somethin happen.. maybe he forgot... or busy.

im in a similiar situation as u but my bf n his x arent married. jus broken up for a long time. i understand how u feel cus thats how i feel about my bf n his ex.. she hasnt done anything wrong but the things she do sometimes w/ him...makes me so mad... in ur case it would b hard more difficult cus ur bf is in the middle of divorice n gettin joint custody of the child.. his ex wife is a b***ch for acting like that.. like u said ur bf cant control the way she feels.. but try to understand in her shoes.. shes gettin a divorce or already has.... she n ur bf has a child toghther.. basically she doesnt want u to be the *mother* of her child..thats how i could see from her actions... i dont blame u or her or even the bf .. your in a tight situation between two ppl and u prolly feel stressed or even feel ur in the middle.. i understand...its not an easy thing to be in... all i can say is....ignore her....just be happy w/ ur bf...and hope things will turn out good for the best. keep ur chin up n cheer up..

i have been in a relationship w/ my bf a little over an year. we been through a lot of dramas lately relating his ex girlfriend. Just last week, he broked it up saying he can't take it anymore with my issues. However, that night we talked and got back toghether. Now, im left with a feeling of what if he is going to find someone now? Or he doesnt love me anymore? feeling negative these days. I dont know. I am depressed now. what can i do to think positive things? All i think right now is the "what lfs" and worrying too much that he'l leave me anytime soon and find someone else. Janella

interesting thing.. cool why do people stay friends w/ their exes? dont feelings come back if u see each other almost everyday? memories dont die.... its always there remaining in our head... and if u have a gf/bf and ex is always in the picture.. wouldnt this cause more trouble in your relationship? i guess im one of the people who dont become friends w/ an ex.. cus they are exes for a reason u broke up for a reason too.. why do u need to be friends w/ them? i just dont understand. from my personal experience with my bf and his ex... i see things differently than him or her.. they think its ok to be friends or sis/bro like... and its ok for them to be there for each other... but i see it different.. i see as if theyre still bf/gf.. i guess jus by their past i assume that way.. do u stay friends w/ exes so maybe if u are single u'll get back with them to try again? or u are friends w/ them cus u broke up and u havent let go of them ... i wish i could see it like how he sees it..but thats jus the difference between him and i ....i guess.

my bf has told me that he sees her as a sister... and vice-versa... she sees him as a big brother... can this really be real?

i am friends with most of all my exes but i do not hang out with them.. its just the way i am... our relationship never lasted long so i dont really have the closenesss of hanging out. we talk sometimes and thats it.. on a different note, my bf is still in contact w/ his ex and roomates with her and other people... does this make him not over her? or does he see her as a sister like friend? can someone answer that?

Im not even sure if this was a right choice i or he made. I'm still feeling down about this. This whole thing is about his damn ex girlfriend and me. They had a history long before me....i would say 10-15 years ago.... I dont like her and she doesnt like me basically. he roomates with her and other people. She isnt the happy type person...more like moody all the time. I go over his house sometimes on weekdays or even on weekends and i sometimes spend the night i dont really live near him i live about 45-50 min away. i dont feel comfy going over there cus of her basically. but he still invites me over regardless she hates it or not. so i go there cus he invites me. at times i feel uneasy or feel im not welcome there. basicaly boyfriend broke it up becuase he said i have too many issues with her or in the relationship. He tells me that they are no longer toghether and have no feelings whatsoever and that its all in my head. im mad right now because it seem as if he broke it up by taking her side...since she doesnt like me. i had ask him to come over my house if she hates me around that house. he said to come over anyways....i dont understand this.... he knows her and me wil never get along. anyways i think he made his choice by choosing her over me... thats what i think.... u guys think he or i did a right thing to get back? as he says...he doesnt want to be drag on and on w/ these issues. everyone thinks im the jealous or insecured person....well if they were in my shoes they would feel this way too.. the ex doesnt like me cus she thinks i have something against her cus of her past and her n my bf.. and that it was decades ago and its nothing recent. she also said i am not a good or right person for him and that he could do so much better......maybe she is right...maybe he isnt for me.... this been goin on for awhile and i am tired too. should i just let him go i feel so sad n sorry for causing dramas..... i went over to his house last nite to get my stuff......but we end up talking and i ask him u really want to break up n he said i dont want to but dont want these drama too.......anyways he said he'l give one more try and said everything will be ok.... i dont know about this.....i talk to my family,friends,and even worker....they all say i should not worry and calm down... if they wana be toghether they had the chance already... sad and confused Janella

well, in my case... my bf's ex is not nice. she doesnt talk to me or even try.. i say hi to her when i see her sometimes but all she do is jus give a small smile. i just ignore her most of the time. she is not my business to be concern about whether or not she wants to be nice or mean to me.

well he had all this time to get with her but he didnt and hes with me.. i mean does that show something? he tells me he loves me and that their just friends nothing more and if he wanted to be w/ her he would done or do so.

yes seriously i just hate the feeling i get afterwards we hang out. so now i dont go hang out w/ them anymore. its only me and my bf that hangs out. i decided to step backward from this relationship. cus right now i feel i should end this relationship even though we very much love each other. i dont think i could handle it anymore. Janella

theyre just friends ( my bf and his ex girlfriend). we all hang out sometimes but i dont really like it cus when we do...its always her and my bf talking. my bf seem more interested in talking with her more than me. i feel like a statue. so, i try not to hang out w/ them anymore. theres many things i think its wrong. i might be over-exeggerating but the things ive seen so far...from past til now.... i seriously dont know whats real and whats not. Janella

Its nice to hear from other perspective about being friends with an Ex. thanks They dated long time ago. Im guessing 5 or 10 years ago? No, he doesnt have pictures out on the open. but once i found on his shelves or on his computer.

Well, my boyfriend said they broke up maybe like 5 or more years ago? I'm not too certain on the years but that is what he said. I do trust him but Sometimes i get those werid feelings. About the pictures? yes, i guess i wont worry about them Once i found them on his room . and He has pictures on his computer too. So i thought he wasnt over her but he says he is. Do i take his word ? Janella

Hello All, My name is Janella and this is my first post here. I'm not sure if I am at the right post area. Here's my story. My boyfriend and I been toghther for an year now. We are happy with each other. He is charming, nice and treats me good. I have one problem. His exgirlfriend She hasnt tried anything bad like trying to get back with my boyfriend or not. Or try to break us up. Shes pretty much in her life with her own boyfriend. I have a question. U guys think its okay for to be friends with an ex? even though they went out long time ago?? can they really be over each other? im very curious. i am not friends with any of my exes. i talk to my exes sometimes online but never hang out. my bf doesnt really hang out w/ her but sometimes through their mutual friends. I know they email and talk on the phone sometimes. Also, i would like to add. My bf has pictures of them two still. Is it really necessary for him to have those and why? Sometimes I think her or she isnt over with each other Can they be just friends and nothing more? Curious, Janella