Goodfun88

I'd say get busy, don't be as available. When he does call to ask you out, tell him your busy that day, but suggest another time to hang out. This will drive up your desire, if any is left. He won't want to imagine you hanging out with another guy, if he likes you at all. Of course, look your best when you do go out, be confident and know your worth his time. Good luck!

Why has he lost interest? More information would be helpful. Are you in a relationship?

I'm not sure why, but thats the way it is. Most of the nerve endings are on the clitoris and thats just the easiest way for most women to orgasm. And if she's close, maybe she'll get there, but you are putting way to much pressure on each other. Sex should be fun, not a chore or work. Also you'll need to work out the trust issues you have, since you guys had a break and it seems like she is having a hard time coping with what happened.

Not all girls can orgasm from intercourse alone. Some can only orgasm from clitoral stimulation, keep that in mind.

I'm not a guy, but maybe he said it because if he had gotten to know you better before having sex the relationship would have ended sooner for lack of compatablity or something, but since you slept together and it was good, it lasted longer than it should. Thats the only thing I could figure.

Well if your ok with it, then thats something you'll have to deal with but I can tell you that would NOT be ok with me. Don't you think he would be happy that he got so lucky his first time, why would he want to spoil that? And risk tainting your relationship forever? Something about that doesn't sit right with me. Having the same number of sex partners or experience doesn't make anything equal. The fact that he's even considered this as an option (not to mention discussed it with you) would be a huge red flag for me. I hope you know that if someone loves you, they would never put your through that. Good luck.

I'm sorry, but this sounds like total bull. Someone who loved you would not want to take time apart to sleep with other women. There is no way, and even if that was the case, there is no way 99% of women would want to continue to be with someone like this. I'm sorry, but if someone is saying these things to you, you may need to reconsider your relationship with this person. Good luck.

Well the good thing is you already know how you'll react. This doesn't mean you shouldn't study with him, this just means you can change how you react and make it a pleasant experience for both of you. You know what's going to happen, in your eyes, so why would you still get upset about it? Just go with the flow and be your cute friendly self and don't let little things stop you from getting what you want! Good luck!

Thank you amuse, I appreciate the kind words and the sound advice!

Oh and I forgot to mention, I told my boyfriend I would fix it, and that I'd email her and try to work something out, he thought it was a great idea, and was surprised that I would do that after everything he told me they said. He just said he'd like to proof read it first.

Bella Donna, I agree with you to some extent, but I was irritated because we had made plans to hang out at the time he decided to go to his uncles. I have no problem with him doing his own thing, but not blowing me off to do his own thing, thats why I called back, because I knew that something must be up, since that is not his normal behavior. Thank you for the advice though!

Amuse, thank you for the insight, its just that this is a person I see myself having a future with. And I know that his mom will always be an important part of his life, so just to make it easier, I'd like for her not to think I'm the spawn of satan. I've never had such a problem in my life, and I've never met anyone who didn't like me, or at least who didn't like me so much that had to yell and scream and make a scene about it. I agree with you though amuse, its jealousy.

No he doesn't want to spend less time with me, I think a small part of him was actually buying into what they said. I guess its hard to hear from people who love you and that you love that they hate someone else you love. He was confused and frustrated when he said that. I'm trying not to take this personally because I honestly feel that any girl he was with, his mom would think the same thing about. It seems like they just want to keep him for themselves, which strikes me as a bit odd. Oh and I forgot to mention, his dad passed away about 10 years ago, so my bf has been standing in as the man of the house, as far as repairs on the house or her car and stuff like that.

Oh I guess I forgot to mention, he did stand up for me and told his mom and his brother that's he's going to be with me and that he loves me. Thanks for the advice Jayar!

Yesterday my boyfriend called me and said he was going to his uncles house and he'd catch me later. I was like catch me later? What the heck does that mean?? I was pissed. So I called him back like 1/2 hour later and he tells me that I'm controlling and that we should spend less time together. I was like what?? Where is all this coming from?? So I finally drag it out of him that him and his mom and his brother got into an argument about me. I should feel so honored! To make a long story short, his mom and brother think that I'm controlling and manipulative. That all I do is follow him around like a puppy dog. That I'm to quiet and I should talk to them more. That he shouldn't settle for the first girl he meets (obviously I'm not the first girl, this guy is almost 30!). That he's never home and never does anything for his mom (he's currently remodeling HER bathroom, not to mention, he's old enough to do what he wants with his time). That he never spends anytime with his brother (his brother just recenly broke with his girlfriend and before that NEVER called my boyfriend to hang out, and still doesn't). That my boyfriend has changed so much since he met me. He got a better job (thats bad right?), sold his car and wants to buy a Ridgeline, has talked about moving out and possibly moving to South Carolina and buying a house. All of this is apparently unacceptable to them. I guess they had other ideas for his life that he was unaware of. My boyfriend got really upset with them and it now really pissed. We worked out the fact that I'm not controlling. It was just frustrating to hear all that, when I've done everything in my power to be nice and friendly with the whole family, well excluding the sister, since once my boyfriend and her got into a fight and she said, "why don't you go hang out with your fat girlfriend", really nice, huh?? I've always been kind of quiet around his mom, but I had no idea she thought this way about me. I'm good looking, a little chunky though, I have a college degree, a job, a car, I come from a good family, never been arrested, no children, never married, have very little debt. I'm trying to figure out what's wrong with me. I guess I thought that they would accept me for who I was and that over time, I'd be more comfortable around his mom and we'd start developing our own relationship, but now I'm confused. I don't want to fight and I know this is harder for my boyfriend than it is for me, but I don't know what to do to make it right. I thought of writing her an email and letting her know that i'm sorry we got off on the wrong foot and that I want to know her better and form a relationship with her. But I don't know if its even worth it at this point. I need some serious advice because I don't want this problem to linger and start to eat away at our relationship. ](*,)

Wow, that was quite a story, I'm at work and the tears were just streaming down my face, good thing no one came into my office. If I ever get a pet, I'm going to adopt an adult for sure!

Why don't you try not having sex till your in a loving and committed relationship? Your letting these guys get what they want and leave. If they don't have to work for it why would they bother?

First of all, its wrong of him to be doing this to you. Secondly, you are letting him get away with it. You are letting him walk all over you. I understand you are trying to be understanding and compromising, but when it starts to affect you, its not right. You need to stand up for yourself and demand to be treated right, or walk away from the situation. At this point, I don't know if there is hope for you to be with this man, because I believe the trust has been destroyed, but you need to remember in any relationship that you deserve to be treated with respect, and if you not getting it, demand it, and if you still don't get it, walk away. I'm sorry your going through such a tough time. Good luck!

I understand you're not wanting to be sneaky. I just wonder how well you can get to know someone, if you are spending time getting to know other people. I understand people date around, but for me, its so hard, once I start getting to know someone, I really don't want to see other people (I call this tunnel vision). For me, if I was wanting to see someone else, that would tell me, hey maybe the person I'm seeing isn't my type, or there isn't much chemistry. Thats all for you to decide though. As long as you are open and honest if the question ever comes up, your not doing anything wrong. I would just wonder if you really did like this woman, would you really want to see what else was out there?

So you are dating a women and you want to date other people? So you don't see yourself being with her in the long term? You are looking for someone to be with long term, but she's not it? I guess if you are not exclusive feel free to date. But at the same time, wouldn't it be fair to let her know that? What if she is developing feelings for you? Never think that anything is understood or expected to be understood. Make yourself clear and be open with what you want and what you are looking for, then you won't find yourself feeling sneaky or guilty.

I wouldn't. I'd just play it cool and let feelings develop and try to get to know each other better. You don't want to scare him off by being over the top with your feelings. Good luck!

I'm sorry, but thats messed up! What's up with his sister? Thats very rude to request that you not be there. Especially since you have already made plans to go with him. He needs to figure something out since its your birthday, if he doesn't, well then I'd seriously consider his feelings for you. I understand for some people blood is thicker than water, but I'm assuming that you guys are serious, so it seems that he should be taking more consideration to your feelings! Good luck!

The best thing you can do is tell her now how you are feeling. Don't let it get any further, because as more feelings start to develop, and you wait a few months, it will appear that you don't like her, and she'll wonder why you are changing everything, and how come you liked talking on the phone before, but now you don't, are you going to break up with me? All that jazz. Nip it in the butt early, do it kindly, tell her you love talking to her, but you'd rather just catch up at night because when you talk to her all day, you don't have much to say and it makes you feel uncomfortable. Sure she may feel a little hurt or upset, or insecure, but she'll get over it. You'll also find that you'll both enjoy your nightly conversations much more, because there will be much more for you to talk about. Just make sure you keep being the same around her, otherwise she could get more insecure, good luck!

It might be wishful thinking, but sometimes I think thats ok, as long as its not holding you back from living your life. I hope that your paths do cross again, because if your anything like me, you are a good person who deserves to be the person they love! Good luck!

I think maybe you are overreacting. Are you doing this to try and push and see if he'd stop you and say no don't do that, come live near me? I think he's honestly trying to be supportive, because you've already stated what you are going to do. He probably thinks you would have asked or talked about you moving closer to him if you were getting a place, and since you haven't brought it up, why should he? Why don't you bring it up and see how he responds? You could say something like, "I was thinking, I haven't found anything here I like, what would you think about me trying to get a place closer to you?" Good luck!