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Thread: Ex is ready to date

  1. #1
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    Ex is ready to date

    Hello,

    This may seem a weird message and I apologise if people think so. I'm just looking for some advice.
    I posted before and people were really helpful.
    I was dumped 5 weeks ago. I really struggled with it as I saw a great future for us.
    Last night I received an email from a dating website I use to use and it told me I had a message. I thought it was odd so logged on to look, turns out it was just a message asking me to sign up to their pay version of the site.
    When I clicked the message it showed a selection of online people above the in box.... I saw my ex there. I clicked her profile and sure enough it had just been set up and stated she was looking for a relationship.

    Is 5 weeks to soon to be looking for dating again? Is this normal?
    We were together just under 2 year

  2. #2
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    Originally Posted by Rb1980
    Is 5 weeks to soon to be looking for dating again? Is this normal?
    We were together just under 2 year
    Not necessarily, if she'd already lost feelings for you before breaking up. Sometimes people lose their emotional attachment to their partner but take their time working up the courage to actually end it. Those are the ones who are usually ready to at least meet some new faces not long after breaking up with their ex. I've been there, too.

    It might not mean she's ready for something serious but she is evidently looking to see what's out there. Sucks to see, I know. I hope you're no contact.

  3. #3
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    Originally Posted by MissCanuck
    Not necessarily, if she'd already lost feelings for you before breaking up. Sometimes people lose their emotional attachment to their partner but take their time working up the courage to actually end it. Those are the ones who are usually ready to at least meet some new faces not long after breaking up with their ex. I've been there, too.

    It might not mean she's ready for something serious but she is evidently looking to see what's out there. Sucks to see, I know. I hope you're no contact.
    Yeah we are. You may remember me from a previous post where I mentioned about her mental health and her calling the police.
    I can't contact her even if I wanted as she has blocked me on everything

  4. #4
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
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    These sites are desperate for business right now, so they show a bunch of random people. Just ignore it. Focus on your own friends, family, career, coping with the epidemic, etc. In fact to get your mind off things run down your contact lists and start randomly asking people how they are doing etc.
    Originally Posted by Rb1980
    I mentioned about her mental health and her calling the police. she has blocked me on everything

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  6. #5
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    Originally Posted by Rb1980
    Yeah we are. You may remember me from a previous post where I mentioned about her mental health and her calling the police.
    I can't contact her even if I wanted as she has blocked me on everything
    Ah yes, I do remember now.

    This quick turnaround is par for the course then, unfortunately. Let this be your final signal that the relationship most definitely needed to end.

  7. #6
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    Originally Posted by MissCanuck
    Ah yes, I do remember now.

    This quick turnaround is par for the course then, unfortunately. Let this be your final signal that the relationship most definitely needed to end.
    When you say par for the course do you mean due to her mental health or something else?

  8. #7
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    Originally Posted by Rb1980
    When you say par for the course do you mean due to her mental health or something else?
    Perhaps, but also the fact that she just seems to be done with the relationship. Based on what you wrote in your other thread, I got the impression she had checked out a while before she ended it.

  9. #8
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    Originally Posted by MissCanuck
    Perhaps, but also the fact that she just seems to be done with the relationship. Based on what you wrote in your other thread, I got the impression she had checked out a while before she ended it.
    Ah I see. I just find it a little sudden plus with the current lockdown it's not like she can go off and see anyone

  10. #9
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    Not sure if this is relevant but when I got serious with my now husband I ended my dating site membership (not how we met) and I think I did something with the profile short of removing it -because I thought this was enough. Apparently it wasn't -people who had viewed me before still could. I couldn't check my messages nor did I wish to -but a few months later someone I'd dated brought this to my attention. i was still logging on -with my then boyfriend's knowledge -if a friend wanted me to look at a profile of someone she liked etc - so apparently it showed me as active to those who had viewed me in the past. Maybe this is the same thing with your ex- I wouldn't assume unless she recently updated her profile? How do you know she just set it up??

  11. #10
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    Originally Posted by Batya33
    Not sure if this is relevant but when I got serious with my now husband I ended my dating site membership (not how we met) and I think I did something with the profile short of removing it -because I thought this was enough. Apparently it wasn't -people who had viewed me before still could. I couldn't check my messages nor did I wish to -but a few months later someone I'd dated brought this to my attention. i was still logging on -with my then boyfriend's knowledge -if a friend wanted me to look at a profile of someone she liked etc - so apparently it showed me as active to those who had viewed me in the past. Maybe this is the same thing with your ex- I wouldn't assume unless she recently updated her profile? How do you know she just set it up??
    Because all the pics are from the past month (they are ones I either saw on fb or ones she sent me to show what she was upto when out with friends etc) plus it includes her new job role etc

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