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Thread: What a dilemma!

  1. #1
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    What a dilemma!

    Ok so hereís my story

    Iím married for 10 years.

    I have 2 kids.

    I am a supervisor for an employee and had a sexual dream about her one night. After that I began to have feelings. All was fine until she began to have feelings too.

    We have gotten to know each other more and turns out she has super natural powers like sheís physcic and can feel emotions. She claims she had the same dream on the same night. Iíve proven out what she knows about me and itís real. She also knows most of how I feel about her.

    We created this bond because I feel like we were made to be together. She understand me, I understand her. We text all the time, talk on the phone all the time. Obviously spend all day at work together. We havenít gotten physical yet but I feel like I want to and itís probably only a matter of time. Weíve sexted, talked about the things weíd do though.

    So we both have had the conversation about our relationship like we want to be together but canít and know we never could. So now Iím heart broken, feel like Iíve ruined my marriage and job. I feel like Iím on an island with no one to talk to about it because this is so out of this world who would believe me?

    You canít make this one up.

    Thoughts? Questions? Advice?

  2. #2
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    I presume you have discussed your feelings with your wife. You are already having an affair. After 10 years you owe it to your wife to be honest with her.

    And no, your situation isn't special. It's the story of every affair that's ever happened.

  3. #3
    Forum Supporter ~Seraphim ~'s Avatar
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    Tell your wife about your special feelings and let her decide what she wants to do.

  4. #4
    Super Moderator Capricorn3's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by ~Seraphim ~
    Tell your wife about your special feelings and let her decide what she wants to do.
    I was going to say the same thing.

    We have gotten to know each other more and turns out she has super natural powers like sheís physcic and can feel emotions. She claims she had the same dream on the same night
    hmmmmm..... yeah. If you believe that, you'll believe anything.

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  6. #5
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    Originally Posted by jsmith19851
    Ok so hereís my story

    Iím married for 10 years.

    I have 2 kids.

    I am a supervisor for an employee and had a sexual dream about her one night. After that I began to have feelings. All was fine until she began to have feelings too.

    We have gotten to know each other more and turns out she has super natural powers like sheís physcic and can feel emotions. She claims she had the same dream on the same night. Iíve proven out what she knows about me and itís real. She also knows most of how I feel about her.

    We created this bond because I feel like we were made to be together. She understand me, I understand her. We text all the time, talk on the phone all the time. Obviously spend all day at work together. We havenít gotten physical yet but I feel like I want to and itís probably only a matter of time. Weíve sexted, talked about the things weíd do though.

    So we both have had the conversation about our relationship like we want to be together but canít and know we never could. So now Iím heart broken, feel like Iíve ruined my marriage and job. I feel like Iím on an island with no one to talk to about it because this is so out of this world who would believe me?

    You canít make this one up.

    Thoughts? Questions? Advice?
    This is how it starts and it's turned out this way because you actually have to do work when you're with your wife and with the new girl, she's new and it's fun. Eventually you're going to run out of things to talk about with this new girl, just like you did with your wife, and it won't be as fun anymore. You may leave this relationship, fight a custody battle or pay child support and you will have kids with the new girl too and you will be right back where you are now, hoping for a newer girl to make life exciting for you. So this road, although initially fun like drugs, has a high consequence, also like drugs. You might as well treat your new "relationship" with this girl as if she were drugs. You're going to want to be with her, really, really badly, and it will screw up your life really badly too.

    Kids get separated, new girl doesn't want the responsibility of your current kids and sees them as burden to her relationship. Or if you decide to ditch them then later on in life they come back asking why they weren't good enough for your love. Or things fizz out with the new girl and you're left with a divorce that didn't need to happen. Or the loss of your family hits you when you finally move in with the new girl and then you blame it on her and then that relationship sucks too. There are many, many ways this ends up wrong. It would've been better for you to end your relationship before meeting anyone new and then started looking. Lastly, dating a direct report is not ok at most companies.

    I recommend apologizing to the new girl, learning your lesson, and never doing this again. Put your effort in with your wife and the kids. If that doesn't work then divorce properly and look for someone new then.

  7. #6
    Platinum Member shellyf62's Avatar
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    What is your wife doing while you are texting & talking to this other woman?

  8. #7
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    LOL, you think this is so "special" and that you have a "psychic connection". Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha!!!

    This is the story of how 99% of all affairs start. You are no different. No, there's nothing "special" about this.

    Do your wife a favor, and tell her, so she can find a good man for herself.

  9. #8
    Gold Member thisisrichey's Avatar
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    yes you can make this up. how many times have we heard this story and its ended in disaster 99% of the time. (very rare that these things work out).

    I call it the 85/15 rule. You have 85% fulfilment from your marriage, but 15% is missing (the "fun stuff"). Along comes a new person who can easily supply the 15% fun stuff and things seem perfect.. b/c you are now 100% fulfilled, except your wife is supplying 85% of it but you attribute it t othe "new, fun 15%" person.

    don't be fooled by the 85/15 rule. If you lose your family and wife and home and the 85 goes away, you're going to quicklyk see how the 15% was only 15% and where will the other 85% come from? Most of the time pepole have this realization and the 85 never comes- they realize they weren't as compatible as they thought, they weren't as connected as they thought. They only felt that way b/c they had 85% of their needs taken by their existing relationship.

    Beyond that.. this is a very dangerous and bordering on LEGAL ramifications if you get with somebody you supervise. Not only coudl you lose your job or be sited for sexual harrassment (someday.. maybe when things don't go well, the honymoon period wears off, and you get into a fight or ven BREAK UP!), but your mistress to be could lose her job and have to look elsewhere and then blame YOU because HR won' allow you 2 to be together.

    Thing long and hard on this one.
    If you really want to do it - then divorce your wife and set her free before you do anything. If ou find you can't or hesitate - that's the 85% talking to you telling you "no.. i can't let go of the 85% I already have secured!"

  10. #9
    Platinum Member SherrySher's Avatar
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    *shaking my head* how do you live with yourself? Seriously? And what kind of floozy/homewrecker is she that she messes around with a married man?

    So, you get up everyday, see your wife and your children,(whom all trust and love you) and you start this fantasy with some woman from work?
    Do you not have a conscience at all? Do you not realize how your decisions could potentially destroy other people?

    File for divorce, go run around with this homewrecker. Let your wife find a decent man.

    But I can promise you that it will only be a matter of time that your fantasy falls apart. She will cheat or you will start looking around again. Neither of you are loyal or have decent morals, so don't expect any kind of happy ending.

  11. #10
    Platinum Member itsallgrand's Avatar
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    If this post is real, I'd suggest you see a mental health professional. I say that sincerely with concern.

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