WHATTTT

[Bora]

I confess my crush!!! I told him that I like him and I said this "But it's just how I feel and I don't wanna make u uncomfortable, Also I don't expect an answer, so don't let it bother u".And he only replied me "okay". Is that a rejection???I can't understand!!!

 

[Wiseman2]

2 minutes ago, Bora said:

I confess my crush!!! I told him that I like him and I said this he only replied me "okay". 

Unfortunately blurting out crushes makes people uncomfortable and especially since it's unrequited it makes you uncomfortable. If you want to stay friends, fine but what is he supposed to do with this confession other than "okay"? You' seem to be hoping for a romcom happy ending but this isn't the way to go about it. 

[Bora]

So does that mean he rejected me??

 

[boltnrun]

Is this the same guy, who you made your "final decision" about a couple weeks ago?

I wouldn't call it a "rejection". More like, he doesn't seem to feel the same way. 

[catfeeder]

34 minutes ago, Bora said:

So does that mean he rejected me??

It means that you told him you didn't expect an answer, and he agreed not to give you one.

Don't say one thing if you really mean another. Either follow through on your words and leave him alone about this, or bother him for an answer and make yourself look like a hypocrite.

[yogacat]

Fortunately, you are no longer stuck in this uncertain state. Perhaps it's time to let go and divert your attention to someone else?

Judging by his response, it seems he is not interested in dating you anytime soon. If he were interested, he would have put in more effort than simply replying with "okay." Even if it caught him a bit off guard and had an inkling of interest, he would have enquired further. Unfortunately, It seems that he isn't into you as you are into him.

Now you know, don't get stuck in his "OK" and move forward.

I'm not sure it would have been any different outcome since you communicated that you don't expect an answer, and not let it bother him. Maybe it's a polite of saying it does not make an iota of difference in my day!  

Brush it off. Your crush will lessen. Another one will arise. Life gives you what you put out there.

[rainbowsandroses]

1 hour ago, Bora said:

I confess my crush!!! I told him that I like him and I said this "But it's just how I feel and I don't wanna make u uncomfortable, Also I don't expect an answer, so don't let it bother u".And he only replied me "okay". Is that a rejection???I can't understand!!!

Couldn't you have simply asked him out in a carefree casual manner and gauged his response?

I mean come on girl, "confessing" feels?  That's just plain awkward, what did you expect him to say?  

I think it's safe to say this man is not interested in you and you should take steps to move on from your feelings.  

Please don't ask me "why"?   It's not important...  

Lesson learned for next time.  No need to confess feelings, simply ask him out, something light, casual and fun.. 

His response will tell you everything you need to know. 

 

[TeeDee]

Never confess a crush like that.  It comes out of left field & the other person just feels bad.   It's awkward.  

Rather, spend more time IN PERSON with your crush.  Up your flirting game & see what happens. 

It's not a rejection but it's also not an enthusiastic response where your crush declares they feel the same way.  You took your shot.  It was poorly received.  Back off. 

[Jaunty]

This approach kind of left the guy cornered.  Not a good set up.   

[Batya33]

I mean sure if he was into you too - he'd have said -I feel the same way but it's a very awkward approach and he did as instructed.  It's also kind of self absorbed.  I would think if you have a crush you want to spend time with him and get to know him better so why didn't you chat with him and ask him to spend some time with you doing a fun activity?

[LootieTootie]

I don't think he rejected you but his response wasn't an emphatic celebration. So yea, I don't think he likes you like that but just as a friend.

[Bora]

10 hours ago, boltnrun said:

Is this the same guy, who you made your "final decision" about a couple weeks ago?

I wouldn't call it a "rejection". More like, he doesn't seem to feel the same way. 

yeah I couldn't give up on him

 

[Bora]

7 hours ago, Jaunty said:

This approach kind of left the guy cornered.  Not a good set up.   

Then what should I do??

[Bora]

9 hours ago, yogacat said:

 Perhaps it's time to let go and divert your attention to someone else?

It sounds easy but it's impossible.I already tried it!!

[Kwothe28]

Confessing only works in movies and TV shows. You never outright say it. As much as its silly, you are suppose to guess some stuff. Just blurring it out creates uncomfortable environment. Nobody outright wants to say they dont like you. It just creates a whole other uncomfortable conversation that you shouldnt have. Hence why “OK” answer from them.

What you should have done? Well, nothing. You already knew he doesnt like you that way. So you shouldnt have pushed that far. 

[Bora]

2 minutes ago, Kwothe28 said:

You already knew he doesnt like you that way. So you shouldnt have pushed that far. 

 

Yeah I knew it. But I got the wrong idea that he might like me back. Maybe cuz he's so kind to me.

[dias]

It wasn't the smoothest way to do it but it doesn't really matter. If he was interested he would be excited about it. There is nothing you can do. 

[TeeDee]

4 hours ago, Bora said:

Then what should I do??

With respect to this guy, nothing.  You took your shot but it didn't work. Now you have to leave him alone until the awkward dies down.  

Going forward when you find yourself liking somebody spend time with him.  Flirt your tail off.  Laugh at the jokes.  Toss your hair.  Touch his arm.  Sit too close etc.  

One of my favorite techniques to gage interest would be to inform the crush where you & your friends will be on a weekend night.  Invite the crush & their friends to show up.  If they come there is interest there.  However, you have to see how they behave.  If they immediately start hitting on your friends or someone else, then you know they do not see you in a romantic light. 

[Jaunty]

7 hours ago, Bora said:

Then what should I do??

Have respect for other people and how they feel, and get a life.

[smackie9]

You are being obsessive and it's making you look ridiculous. If a guy came up to you out of the blue and said those things to you what would you think? Get yourself together here, and slow your roll. Was it a rejection...It's possible. Anyways what were you expecting? Him running into your arms? No of course not. Guys don't like girls throwing themselves at them. They do like a little bit of a challenge. Just saying...when a guy is really interested in you he will ask you out. Leave it at that in future. 

[yogacat]

9 hours ago, Bora said:

It sounds easy but it's impossible.I already tried it!!

Whaaat? This issue is like giving you a long distance hug. hahaha Patience is a sweet reply right now right?

Hmm...

Do something that can help you thaw. Like, try to work on that project that you long to finish, join a group perhaps? You're not the only one that has ever had a crush. I've had them. Then a different person steps in and it's as if he vanished from my mind. I did have one for a long time, eventually feelings subsided. I've also had men with crushes on me. I let it be known it couldn't happen between us as he was like my brother/sister. Man that helped a lot. 

Good luck!

[jul-els]

The feeling isn’t mutual. Accept it and let it go for your own well being and self respect. Holding on to it is just self inflicted torture. Don’t do that to yourself. 

[Bora]

2 hours ago, jul-els said:

The feeling isn’t mutual. Accept it and let it go for your own well being and self respect. Holding on to it is just self inflicted torture. Don’t do that to yourself. 

Yeahh I think I should let go him

 

[Bora]

But this time...I really think I can get over him

[ShySoul]

Sometimes saying your feelings isn't about getting the answer you want, its about clearing the air and getting things off your chest. Of course you would rather hear they like you as well and you can have the happy ever after. But often it doesn't work out.

I wouldn't view it as a rejection, rather him not having the same feelings. He, as most people would, tried to take the easy way out without hurting your feelings. You gave him an opening in saying he didn't need to respond, so he took it. Doesn't mean he is a bad guy or that he doesn't care about you at all, just not up to the level of interest you have in him. There may be an awkward stage where you are both adjusting to this getting out in the open, but there is no reason you can't still be friends if you like. If he is the nice guy you've said, he'll still be nice to you. 

7 hours ago, Bora said:

But this time...I really think I can get over him

That's why saying what you are feeling is a good thing. Before there was the lingering doubt. You weren't sure. Now you can say you took your shot and know how it turned out. I still kick myself for not confessing feelings when I was younger. You won't have that regret. You'll see that it wasn't as bad as you might have imagined and find that you can survive. And next time, it might be a little easier.

Having crushes can be exciting and scary all at once. Be proud of yourself. You went on the rollercoaster and came out ok on the end. Eventually there will come a guy who feels just as strongly for you.