I lost my sexual appetite because of a possible transgender encounter.

[Seraphim]

I told you. Visit a therapist. You don’t even know if that happened or can’t even verify if that happened. Oh if you feel traumatized visit a therapist . Traumatization requires therapy.

[katrina1980]

Okay thanks, but I don't think this has anything to do with semantics on transgenderism. Not sure if semantics is the right word, but I am just trying to figure out how to do about me and how my body is reacting to this.

 

Take steps to change your mind frame. Either on your own by researching it for understanding or with the help of a qualified professional who specializes in sexual issues.

[ironpony]

Okay it's just it might be a while before I get in like maybe a few weeks and want to know if there is anything I can do until then, I mean I can't even concentrate on work or driving or sleeping as much now.

[Seraphim]

Okay it's just it might be a while before I get in like maybe a few weeks and want to know if there is anything I can do until then, I mean I can't even concentrate on work or driving or sleeping as much now.

It is time for treatment for compulsive thoughts. CBT.

[ironpony]

Okay but I asked my gf and my women friends opinions on the pictures, and said how the girls vagina looked very much like the SRS ones and how she had scars on her breasts. My friends said they think that I am likely right from what I described, and that I am not going crazy over it.

[Seraphim]

Okay but I asked my gf and my women friends opinions on the pictures, and said how the girls vagina looked very much like the SRS ones and how she had scars on her breasts. My friends said they think that I am likely right from what I described, and that I am not going crazy over it.

You have said this 15 times already and my answer is going to be the same thing . THERAPIST. CBT.

[DanZee]

Well, I'll play this game. In changing a man into a woman, the vagina is not very deep. It's more like a pocket than a passageway since it was dissected from the scrotum. You would not have been able to penetrate a sexually reassigned person very deeply. Do you remember if it felt any different than sex with anybody else? I think you would have noticed that. Also, was she Muslim? I just ask because there's 30 countries where female circumcision is practiced and the clitoris is removed. Also, I think you would have noticed breast implants versus breast reduction. Implants are very symmetrical and firm whereas breast reductions would just have scars and would look natural. There would have been other things you would have noticed, so I think you're just obsessing about this.

[katrina1980]

Okay it's just it might be a while before I get in like maybe a few weeks and want to know if there is anything I can do until then, I mean I can't even concentrate on work or driving or sleeping as much now.

 

Why though? What is your thought process?

 

Although it is affecting you sexually, this is actually being caused by something mentally.

 

Are you consciously or subconsciously imagining you had sex with a man?

 

It sure sounds like it, which again is incorrect thinking.

[Realitynut]

Katrina...i thought the only way to know for sure if a person is a man...or woman...is thru the chromosomes. XX for women. XY for men. The Y make the sperm etc. That's what makes a man a man....and a woman a woman. Just because a man FEELS like a woman....doesn't discount the fact that she WAS originally a male.

[ironpony]

Well, I'll play this game. In changing a man into a woman, the vagina is not very deep. It's more like a pocket than a passageway since it was dissected from the scrotum. You would not have been able to penetrate a sexually reassigned person very deeply. Do you remember if it felt any different than sex with anybody else? I think you would have noticed that. Also, was she Muslim? I just ask because there's 30 countries where female circumcision is practiced and the clitoris is removed. Also, I think you would have noticed breast implants versus breast reduction. Implants are very symmetrical and firm whereas breast reductions would just have scars and would look natural. There would have been other things you would have noticed, so I think you're just obsessing about this.

 

Oh okay. Well are all breast implants firm? I thought only the models would want the firm ones, but are there some women who want implants that feel natural? Or would almost all women want the firm ones if there was a choice? As for the vagina not being very deep, how deep are we talking here for a sexually re-assigned person?

 

Why though? What is your thought process?

 

Although it is affecting you sexually, this is actually being caused by something mentally.

 

Are you consciously or subconsciously imagining you had sex with a man?

 

It sure sounds like it, which again is incorrect thinking.

 

How would I imagine it subconsciously vs. consciously? Are you asking if I am imagining it in my subconscious, like in my sleep?

[katrina1980]

I'm out ironpony, your issues are beyond what I can help you with.

 

Best of luck figuring this out.

[Seraphim]

Stop with the one tract thoughts and consider other possibilities .

[DanZee]

Oh okay. Well are all breast implants firm? I thought only the models would want the firm ones, but are there some women who want implants that feel natural? Or would almost all women want the firm ones if there was a choice?

 

Well, you have the choice of silicon or saline implants. Saline looks like bags and they don't look very natural. Silicone is firmer than fat and they don't tend to move from side to side. You would know if you were dealing with implants.

 

As for the vagina not being very deep, how deep are we talking here for a sexually re-assigned person?

 

It's not very deep. Think about how much space that's down there. Doctors take out the prostate, but that doesn't make much room. You would just get the head of your penis in there.

[katrina1980]

@Realitynut, I don't know anything about this woman's feelings.

 

Or what caused her to have the SRS surgery. Assuming she did, we don't even know that for sure.

 

I was just explaining what transgenderism is (I actually just researched it to be sure myself before posting) cause it seemed like the OP didn't understand it, and is thinking he had sex with a man.

 

I said nothing about her feelings, again have no idea what she was feeling.

 

If that was what you were even asking!! :)

[DanZee]

Katrina...i thought the only way to know for sure if a person is a man...or woman...is thru the chromosomes. XX for women. XY for men. The Y make the sperm etc. That's what makes a man a man....and a woman a woman. Just because a man FEELS like a woman....doesn't discount the fact that she WAS originally a male.

 

There's some early research that seems to indicate that transgender people have some of the brain structures of the opposite sex. So it's possible there was either more or less estrogen or testosterone released at the wrong time during fetal development. So the XX or XY chromosomes wouldn't matter. So you would have the brain of a woman trapped in the body of a man and vice versa.

[Seraphim]

There's some early research that seems to indicate that transgender people have some of the brain structures of the opposite sex. So it's possible there was either more or less estrogen or testosterone released at the wrong time during fetal development. So the XX or XY chromosomes wouldn't matter. So you would have the brain of a woman trapped in the body of a man and vice versa.

Exactly it depends on the fetal hormones and maternal hormones at play at the different times of fetal development. Sexuality is heavily influenced by the brain and brain structure and neural pathways not just chromosomes.

[ironpony]

Well I suppose her breasts did look kind of baggy but I thought maybe that was because she was overweight, not because of implants. Overall, I don't remember anything unusual feeling about the breasts, accept for the scars.

 

As for a vaginoplasty, I asked a person about it who herself was transgender and had SRS to get an opinion and she said that modern vaginoplasties can go all the way deep in. Is that true though?

[katrina1980]

@DZ, I'm impressed! Makes sense.

 

I mean I know what TG is, but didn't know the why of it.

 

I swear, the things I learn on this forum.....

[Capricorn3]

of a woman I slept with almost ten years ago. I feel traumatized from it,

All of this from ten years ago??

[ironpony]

I guess it just came back and hit me cause of what I remembered all of a sudden.

[DanZee]

Well I suppose her breasts did look kind of baggy but I thought maybe that was because she was overweight, not because of implants.

 

If they fell to the sides when she was laying down, they're real. Implants usually don't move much.

 

As for a vaginoplasty, I asked a person about it who herself was transgender and had SRS to get an opinion and she said that modern vaginoplasties can go all the way deep in. Is that true though?

 

It's somewhat true, but on average they're not as deep as a normal woman's vagina. It's a problem of anatomy. They have to use medical devices to expand the canal since the space used is narrower or it will close up. Also the vagina is not self-lubricating and lube has to be used. Did you have to use lube?

[figureitout23]

I guess it just came back and hit me cause of what I remembered all of a sudden.

 

Or the event triggered your thoughts and all this manifested itself. Again, I find it incredible you would remember so many details about this specific woman but not even know the exact number of women you’ve even slept with

 

The subject of sex seems to really be one of interest for you. Every month or so there’s a new girlfriend and new dilemma always centered around sex, I don’t think that’s a coincidence.

[MissCanuck]

OP, you need the sort of help nobody here can provide you with.

 

We cannot help you be less obsessive. We cannot help you not be triggered. I don't think that debating the specifics of this long-ago partner's body part is even the point, or particularly helpful here. Your thought process is such that you can't or won't hear what people are telling you.

 

Please, do seek therapy. The degree to which your anxiety and fear is manifesting over this hypothetical from a decade ago suggests there are much deeper issues you need to sort out.

[Wiseman2]

Your morbid curiosity disgusted you. It's no different than getting engrossed in looking at any other surgical procedures. For example I wouldn't research and get engrossed in graphic pics of colon surgery and then go out to eat.

 

It has nothing to do with whatever you "remember" from 10 years ago. Unless you're a gynecologist, you're not an expert on all variations of female anatomy.

 

You had issue with your gf way before this. You are constantly finding reasons why you are not attracted to her. You and your gf need to go out on interesting dates rather than sit around on netflix then stare at laptops at graphic surgery photos for hours.

I most likely had sex with a woman who was once a man. now I have lost my sexual appetite over it, and I cannot get aroused by my current gf anymore.

[SherrySher]

This was 10 years ago.

 

Let's say it was a transgender, so be it. It was a human body, you had sex, and it's now said and done. It's been years and years and years.

 

Leave the past in the past. You can't undo it now, can you?

 

The only thing you can do now is to be far more careful and know who you are actually getting into bed with.

 

But as for this case, it's said and done, let it go. It will be impossible to prove one way or the other, so why bother wasting energy on something that can never be proved?

 

Move on, enjoy time with your gf now a days, life is too short.