tattoobunnie

Try ASMR EMDR for your PSTD; many therapists can do this for you. And generally may only take a few sessions.

Bring your new fella.

1) Stop blaming her for why your business failed. One, why in the world are you talking about your employees together on the phone while they are there. There is beyond unprofessional. You do that at home together. And, COVID closed down shop for endless companies, so stop holding that resentment over her. If your employees felt acknowledged or recognized, they wouldn't just leave a functional business. 2) You need to get yourself close to cumming (masturbate, watch porn); most women cannot have multiple orgasms, so if you are banging for over 20 minutes, that is way too long for them. 3) Get back out there in the work world, or focus on caring for your kid and your MIL. Either way, your self esteem is in the toilet, and it is so unattractive on top the giant chip you have that it's all her fault why you're life sucks. 4) Just be in charge on maintaining the cars. Take that off her plate. Make the appointments, and drive her to work or whatever. 5) You are better off going to therapy on your own. You have so much resentment towards her that you need to work through, not her.

I would have just paid ice cream for everybody, but that's just me. Meaning, instead of letting the BF pay for the sis and your BF, you pay. Why should they pay for your ice cream, again? I mean it's tacky to only 3 out of 4 people, but I would let it go. Be the cooler person, not the petty one.

Maybe try a penis pump? I am not joking.

I used to write just like this, even sent love letters as a prank in college. All for fun, but cruel joke to be honest. I honestly think it's fiction. Mine sure was. And essentially, you just read her journal. A good writer is all about the details. I think you should let her be herself in her writing.

Nothing will change until you change. He is the same broken record. You've given him your love. Fighting with love won't change anything, nor this dynamic.

My hubs puts tons of effort into my gifts past few years. I return them all or hide them. He's the love of my life. I don't know what to tell you, other than to not take it personally. For the entire time we've known each other, I have some sensory issues to fabric or the way something feels, knew it, but couldn't explain it, but just did recently after 29 years because now I know what the hell it is. But, I definitely would tell him you put a lot of effort into it, and he really hurt your feelings.

He can use evidence to gain full custody of the child and the house. They can portray it as instead of caring for the child, she was using her time to contact strangers to bed them. Attorneys with the big d*ck energy makes a huge difference.

She sounds incredibly broke (why they had to move home), and lonely. Trust me, she is awkward, depressed, and trying to create any excuse to hang out. I've been in her spot before, the whole moving home, and having zero friends because I lived away for years and years. I am in NY where it takes 3 years to feel good in your skin. She just got there, and needs time to decompress. Not sure if it makes you feel better, but she's not in a good spot despite what she posts on her social media.

Almost all people are not interested in sex with their partner when they're partner is banging someone else. It doesn't matter if his 1st wife was interested or not; he still selfishly cheated on her, and it ended the marriage. You are next in line whether or not you aren't ready to divorce.

Never say never. And never ever think marriage is easy the entire time. There are many ways to break fidelity in 31 years. People who love each other and want to be together, can learn to work through it and forgive and get past it. Your parents are humans, and humans all make mistakes. In 11,315 days of marriage, things happen. What you do to be accountable of it, is the difference.

I also want to add when my hubs and I were dating, my now MIL told me that this one girl who "was" a mutual friend who he dated for a year or more was the "love of his life." NOT. He left her over her secret coke habit, and weird hang out on orgasms. My point; who cares what she says. It is also creepy she told your mom this, and your mom told you this. Haven't they learned to not be such sh*t stirrers?

What looks like passion on the outside sounds like chaos and nothing else in common on the inside. Passion does not equal intimacy. I would totally disregard two old ladies gossiping.

Right?! Even then, they should be able to find a two bedroom. Just tell then they have 60 days to heave ho. And in the meantime, they need to cover utilities. And, change the wifi password. And if you are feeling generous, give her the money she gave you for utilities, back, so she can buy furniture for the new place. It's one thing to escape an abusive partner. It's another to blow off paying rent for months, only to find another sucker to pay their way. No thanks.

I say, "cool," when I am super stoked, but don't wanna come off as weird. I literally just type, "Cool" and nothing else. I think you should take a few deep breaths, and not over analyze it.

Oh, when I read your text, it sounded like you wanted an FWB situation. You did say way too much stuff. I would just CALL him (leave zero room for interpretation), and ask him to dinner. If he says, "no," at least you gave it a shot.

He isn't frugal...he's a cheapstake. He's already had his chance. No need to give another. You can't unteach being selfish at his age.

Exactly what Jibralta says. Sorry, but unless he's a professional contractor, trying to be the guy who swoops in after all the big stuff is done by you and your dad is so off putting and controlling. He can spend his time researching the perfect diamond ring, home decor, and recipes. And if you want, he can do landscaping. Even if wants to show off what a man he is, he's coming off as a giant brat having a mild tantrum. What if you hired a contractor? Are you supposed to fire them? Why is it an issue that you're dad is helping you? Are you not allowed time with him? I am sure he has great qualities, but tread carefully with anyone you have to walk on egg shells for. It's your house, and you can do what you like and hire who you like, and work on it when and with whom you like.

Sounds like she's super lonely. That if she doesn't have verbal diarrhea, she is left to her thoughts, and they aren't happy ones. I have taught myself to tune out; key phrase to seem like you're listening. really? oh! wow that's crazy I wouldn't take her blabber personally. Sounds like she has very little people to connect with, so says the most mundane stuff. If you can't zone out, ask her questions to steer the conversation.

OMG - Run. Talk about baggage. People who gaslight you about how you should know better, assume things like this, and disrespectful of your time, and then brings their mama into it, is not the right guy. He sounds like a chore.

Never buy a house with someone who isn't your spouse. Why the rush? It's better to be marry later or move in later, then divorce within a few years and stuck with having to buy them out when they move out after breaking up. Home ownership is great. I think another poster says it's not for them, but maintaining and updating it is all a part of home ownership. Not to be contrary, but I have never had to wait for repairs to be handled, even during the pandemic. And, you can do it. You don't need him.

While your partner was at home with the kids, the first chance you got, you cheated on her, then kept on an emotional affair for over a month after. And, you tried to cover it up. If you haven't got caught, you'd probably would have done it again and again. Things like this blows up families; you were and are being selfish. My advice, give her access to your phone whenever she wants. Access to all your emails and social media. You blew up your right to privacy. Don't go on "lads" trip, because you obviously couldn't make it with cheating on her. And do a deep dive on why you did this, because I don't think you even know yet.

Download all of her voicemails onto your computer, and keep them in part of child custody, because I guarantee they will try to make you sound like a psychotic monster who cannot care for children. Without evidence, they will drag you through court to get full custody. Haven't spoken to my MIL since 2011 after hubs and I got engaged. She has never met our kids, and hubs supports this fully, nor has seen or spoken to her as well for several years. I also call the cops on her every single time she "drops by" over the years. The major difference though is that I never had to explain to him how messed up her behavior was. Two years of him thinking her behavior was normal until you threaten divorce 100% means, he's just placating you, and you cannot trust him. But her job is to isolate him from you (and if you divorce, she wins), and it can take a while to realize how much abuse he endured and that is was never right or normal. So, quite honestly, if you want this to work, it means, she can no longer ever be in your life and your children's lives because you cannot trust a person who curses you, but wants to hold your kids...NOPE...NEVER EVER! This means, calling the cops as soon as you pulls up to your home; you don't have to press charges, but put it on a file. Both of you blocking her number(s), friends, because she will convince them to call you, or use their numbers, blocking her on all social media, emails; keep in mind, she will use "death in the family", illness, suicide threats, harassment, call your employers, to get you to response to her. Stay strong. Stay a united front. And be informed. Look up histrionic narcissistic personality disorder. This is her to a "T" I read your 2nd post; I am very sorry for your loss. I am very sorry. What you went through, and having to deal with that trash POS MIL, ugh, I hope things work out. Big hugs.

Look, we can all coddle you, and just nod our heads with your misery, but I remember being your age and dating, and looking for "the one." In fact at your age, I wanted to off myself after a relationship that brought me to ENA. It took 3 years to work though things, even while dating, to figure out what I wanted, being happy with being on my own, never marrying, and just living life to the fullest. There are plenty of people who didn't coddle me, and honestly, because of that, I was ready for the love of my life that I'm happily married to with kids. I feel fricken fulfilled, and it wasn't because of a relationship. And it's not because I managed to become a "10" or "mega-rich." You are teetering between staying in your comfort zone or getting it...but you'll never, ever get out of your funk if you don't get out of your G-Da** way.